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Discover weekly, the best short stories

Looking for a steady supply of funny short stories? Every week thousands of writers submit stories to our writing contest.

8560+ Funny Short Stories to read

Submitted by writers on Reedsy Prompts to our weekly writing contest. The world can get dreary and overwhelming, so when you’re looking to have a good laugh, take a scroll through our free collection of funny short stories.

Funny Short Stories – Page 2 of 571

The Spook Who Sleuths: Case of the Immortal Curse

Submitted to Contest #295

RAIN DRUMMED AGAINST my office window like a junkie’s fingers on a pawnshop counter. I nursed a ghostly approximation of bourbon—can’t taste the stuff anymore, but old habits haunt you just like, well, ghosts.Name’s Roxie Hart, supernatural P.I. extraordinaire. Been dead since ‘45 after I zigged when I shoulda zagged during a particularly dicey OSS operation near Berlin. Now I solve the cases that leave the living scratching their noggins.My door creaked open—I keep it that way on purpose, good for the atmosphere—and in stumbled a fella look...

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They Speak

Submitted to Contest #295

“Hunter, hey, Hunter—it’s time to wake up.”Hunter opened one eye and looked at the clock. “Oh, six o’clock, okay, okay!” He closed his eye again, then raised his head with a start! “Who? What?” He looked around the room, but saw no one. “Oh man, was I dreaming? It didn’t sound like any of the neighbors. I guess somehow a dream friend knew what time it was here,” he chuckled out loud. “I’ll wait for the snooze.”He settled back on the bed, facing the ceiling, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath.“Hunter. Hunter, it’s five past six. I’ve giv...

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The Amazon Prince

Submitted to Contest #295

The Amazon PrinceA Tale of Delusion, Destiny, and Delayed Deliveries By D’Anna Cannaveno Every maiden dreams of meeting her Prince Charming—a tall, gallant man with dazzling armor, flowing locks, and rippling pectorals that glisten in the light of enchanted fireflies (or, in our case, the flickering fluorescents of aisle 17). Some dream of royalty. Others long for dangerous rogues with forbidden tattoos and mysterious pasts. And if you're on the thrillingly toxic side of the tavern, perhaps a charming outlaw or street sorcerer with a sk...

8 likes 1 comment 1
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Last Night I Dreamed About Oprah...Again!

Submitted to Contest #295

Please don't judge me immediately or assume I had some kind of obsession—I didn't. I was and still am a reasonably sane person with an unusually ordinary life. But these dreams had been coming pretty often with alarming regularity. We seemed to have some sort of cosmic connection—that is, Oprah and me. It might be plausible if you think about the advancement of quantum physics. Who knows what they've discovered with those accelerating detectors searching through elusive black holes . . . maybe holograms of twin selves evolving into—okay, I d...

18 likes 6 comments 6
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Loctopus

Submitted to Contest #295

“Mail call, Moosie!” Vanessa bellows as she bursts through the front door of our apartment. She’s carrying a medium-sized package. Once I see the pink floral packing tape surrounding it, I know instantly that it’s from my Grandma Opaline, my family’s oldest flower child, who spends her senior years knitting, playing her harp, and reminiscing about the past, and how music was so much better fifty years ago. Vanessa puts the box on the dining table. “I wonder what it is?” she says. “Were you expecting anything?”“Nope,” I reply. “My birthday’s ...

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Airing Cupboard Alchemy

Submitted to Contest #295

All the nice girls love a sailor,All the nice girls love a tar.For there's something about a sailor,(Well you know what sailors are!)Bright and breezy, free and easy,He's the ladies' pride and joy!He falls in love with Kate and Jane,then he's off to sea again,Ship ahoy, ship ahoy!But enough of that old English music hall song for a moment, we’ll come back to that shortly. For now, let me ask you a question…What springs to mind when you think of magic? Perhaps a showman in a flashy tuxedo with a corny catchphrase, a top hat, and white rabbits...

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Is He Dead?

Submitted to Contest #295

THE FUNERAL…“Is he gone?” Elizabeth asks with hope and anger.“Well, he looks dead, he is in a casket and his hair looks terrible!” Becca replies, knowing Elizabeth knows too. “His hair, dear God, remember…the perm.” They both say, quietly laughing a little too long. A mix of relief from the past and sadness for what never will be. Becca looks at the casket one more time. “Where is he?” Elizabeth asks. ABOVE…“Where is he, purgatory?”“Yep, you want him?” “Uh, no, God.” He responds, “I mean, he is not bad enough for me and not quite good enough...

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Sandwich Magic

Submitted to Contest #295

I wake up, but it feels like I never actually slept. There’s this heavy, dull ache in my chest that I can't shake off. I sit up, and the world spins for a second, not from anything physical, but from the weight of... everything. Like my body’s tired, but it’s not from anything I’ve actually done. It’s like I’ve been carrying this invisible burden forever. I can't remember the last time I felt good about anything. Nothing excites me, nothing makes me feel like there's something worth getting up for. It’s all just a blur of grey—every day is t...

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Being the Chosen One is Highly Overrated

Submitted to Contest #294

I'm looking for someone to tell me if I am the chosen one. So far, I've asked a knight, a wise man, and a wizard. I got nowhere with the first two, but the wizard pointed me to Mordrone, an old dragon who might know. Unfortunately, Mordrone was just as likely to eat me as tell me what I wanted to know; it mattered which side of the horde he woke up on. No matter the risk, I had to find out. If I discover I am the chosen one, I need to save whoever I'm supposed to be saving. So I trekked to the dragon's cave and asked my question. "Excuse me,...

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I Eat Dum Pi

Submitted to Contest #294

“Blouba fulu roy som toy fom fom,” the U.S. leader said with great passion and conviction as he spoke through every top news station.“Jale freyman sale hombro! Meztra fracze patzel frazeh!”This was President Eggoe X. Shrub’s first speech—his inauguration speech—since he was reelected into the greatest leadership position of a great nation for his second and final term, with the help of a trusted and true voting system. But that wasn’t the only first on this day—this was also the first time the president had ever conducted an entire...

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Proclamation Parchments and Scandal Sheets

Submitted to Contest #294

Not even Malory Tennyson knew what was in the wooden box in the back room of his Cloudbank Cabin for Arthurian Studies. And not even Sir Lancelot du Lac had been daring enough to open it. Lancelot had very unpleasant memories of the macabre contents of a very similar box he had cleared out from the vault in the Dolorous Tower after he defeated its evil overlord, who practiced the black arts.But Psycho Motor Dabrowski, one of the five overexcitable Dabrowski Dog companions of Little Plump Jo, the current Artisan in Residence in Cloudbank Cabi...

6 likes 1 comment 1
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Future Tense

Submitted to Contest #294

“Your future is our success.”Pendleton was standing on the small stage, picked out by a spotlight. He was outlined in a silver-grey halo reflected off the screen behind him. He was on the stage of the Rivoli Cinema. Benucci Radio Components Ltd. often hired this venue for their all-hands meetings. It was cheap, big enough, and just around the corner from the office.Usually, the all-hands were planned well in advance: announcements of minor strategy changes or summaries of quarterly reports. But this was different. The invite to this eme...

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A Tight Leash

Submitted to Contest #294

“I’m feeling restless, Max.” Max was older, wiser, Danny’s go-to guy when he was feeling out of control, like he had been lately. He’d been waiting for this video chat all week. “What do-ya mean, restless?” Max asked. Danny looked around for Linda to make sure she wasn’t listening, then leaned in. “Crazy. Like something’s missing.” “What’s missing?” “I don’t know. I feel like wandering.” “Wandering? You mean, like, a trip with no destination?” “Maybe. Or maybe a trip with a destination.” “Where do-ya wanna go, Kid?” “I don’t know!” Danny ans...

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From the Desk of Doktr Downdraft

Submitted to Contest #294

~ From the desk of Doktr Hampton P. Downdraft ~    DULCENEW NEW MEXICO APRIL2046 I don’t have much time. Not enough to tell this tale with mycustomary flare.  Hopefully,I can remain lucid long enough to share  a sufficient, albeit dull, Reader’s Digest version.  Recently,the ‘Bug Whisperer’ paid me a visit, and already I feel the dreaded C-33 virus,more readily recognized by its moniker, the ‘Satan-X’ variant, coursing throughmy plaque-clogged veins. The victim of a dreadfully exces...

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Innocent Heights

Submitted to Contest #294

You ever notice how little kids can’t quite pronounce certain words? The letter R, for instance. Yeah, it didn't stand a chance. “Car” becomes “cah,” and “hair” turns into… well, “hay-woo.” And don’t even try throwing an L and an R in the same word. “Probably”? Good luck. You’ll get “pwobably” at best. Anyway, let me tell you about this date I went on. Nice guy named Eddie. Polite, easygoing, intelligent, and—most importantly—open to trying new things. Like snow skiing. Which, in hindsight, should’ve been my first clue. But back then I thoug...

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RBE | Illustrated Short Stories | 2024-06

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