Murray Burns

Author on Reedsy Prompts since Jan, 2022

Stories (86)

86 Stories

2528 karma pts

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“Advice- 5 cents/$5.00” by Murray Burns

Advice- 5â‚”  $5.00If you’ve ever wondered what happened to Lucy Van Pelt of “Peanuts” fame, you’ve come to the right place. If the topic never concerned you, well, maybe you’ll stumble across the subject in a late-night, free-wheeling Trivia game, and you can impress your friends.Young Lucy’s business model mirrored Lincoln’s reflection on the legal profession- her time and advice were her stock in trade. Children from all over the neighborhood sought her counsel on a w...

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“The Beavis and Butt-Head Self-Help Program for the Socially Awkward” by Murray Burns

The Beavis and Butt-Head Self-Help Program for the Socially AwkwardPre-school.“Ernie, have you met the new girl, Melissa?”“No, Miss Finn.”“Would you like to meet her?”“Not really.”“Well, you should want to know everyone in our group. Ernie, this is Melissa. Melissa, this is Ernie.”“Oh, I know her! She’s the one who farted in church last week.”“Earnest!”“What? She did fart, Miss Finn. Didn’t you
Melissa? Tell her how you farted right in the middle of Father John’s Homily...

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“Cool” by Murray Burns

CoolHigh school. The land of the haves and the have-nots. The cool kids and the outcasts who gather at the nerd table in the lunchroom. The quarterback and the 3rd trombone in the school band. The Petrie dish for the natural evolution of separations within a species long before sociologists wrote about tribes and caste systems. Calvin knew where he was, and he knew he didn’t belong there.He fit in, but he hated where he fit in. His “f...

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“The Mentor” by Murray Burns

The MentorOff-key crooning
“The green leaves of summer are starting to fall, and those
’’“Enough with all the melancholy end-of-summer stuff, Sawyer!”“How about something a little more upbeat like a little ‘Summer Nights’ from Grease, Jesse?”“Oh my God, no. If I hear about Sandy and Danny one more time I’m going to toss my cookies. You need to move on. Summer’s over. We had a good run, but school starts tomorrow.”“Yeah, I know, but I sure am going to miss those lazy,...

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“Attaboy, Joey!” by Murray Burns

Attaboy, Joey!“Attaboy, Joey! Nice swing. You can do it!”Truth be told, Joey couldn’t do it.Strike three.Joey slowly walked off the field with his head down. His Dad understood the hurt and put his arms around him.“It’s okay, Joey, you’ll get ‘em next time.”Tom didn’t really believe that, but that’s what dads say.You may have heard a coach say something like, “What a kid lacks in talent can be made up for with hard work and desire.” Don’t believe it. Joey had ...

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“"Pen Pals"” by Murray Burns

“Pen” Pals “The guy is a genius, Matt.” “How’s that?” “You’ll see. Watch and learn.” ---------- Dear Martha, I hope this letter finds you well. The days become longer and harder here. The only thing that keeps me going is the thought of holding you in my arms the day I leave this terrible place. Love, Old School P.S....

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“No Returns” by Murray Burns

No ReturnsMr. Arnie Irk Customer Relations                                                                     &nb...

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“Overdue” by Murray Burns

OverdueThe small, snuggly town was named Life Magazine’s #1 Place to Live in America a stunning seven years in a row. Maple Grove defined quaint, rural, and rustic. Its streets weren’t tree-lined; its trees were street-lined. Happy smiley faces everywhere, children and adults, a Ward, June, Wally, and Beaver behind every door.Everyone knew everyone. The barber was the butcher’s uncle, the fireman was the baker’s brother, and the teacher was the student’s aunt. The children all played together i...

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“Heavenly Do-Over Duel” by Murray Burns

Heavenly Do-Over Duel Circumstance, coincidence, and fate always play a role. If King George hadn’t been quite so greedy, if the first shot had not been fired at Lexington Green, and if Alexander Hamilton had not married the daughter of Philip Schuyler, there might not have been a story. But these three stepping stones did fall into place to lead to the fateful events of July 11, 1804 in Weehawken, New Jersey, and the additional extraordinary events that followed.Hamilton and Aaron B...

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“One Night Out on the Lake” by Murray Burns

One Night Out on the LakeThe best time to fish for walleyes is the last half-hour of sunlight. Every fisherman worth his weight in nightcrawlers knows that. It is also the best time to be out on the lake for any reason, or even better, for no reason- the wind dies down, the temperature drops, the sky presents a tapestry of extraordinary colors, all is quiet and still, and it is enough to just be there. Marty knew this better than any man alive, and he took full advantage. He was there so of...

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“Get Your Kicks on Route 66” by Murray Burns

Get Your Kicks on Route 66“You sure about this, Zak?”“A little late for second-guessing, Cal.”The ’55 Chevy was packed to the gills, and the wheels were already rolling out of the driveway of Zak’s parents’ home within a stone's throw of Lake Micigan in Evanston, Illinois.“It’s just such a big step.”“No kidding, Cal, but you’ve had like 50,000 hours to think about it. There’s no turning back, partner. California here here we come!”And so the sky blue Bel A...

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“Dreams of the Father” by Murray Burns

Dreams of the Father“It is a wise man who knows his own son.”                                 - William Shakespeare, Merchant of VeniceIt was one of the first things imprinted in Charlie’s mind as a child, an integral part of the foundation of his memory and a guidepost for the path to be followed...

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“Hollywood Hack” by Murray Burns

Hollywood HackThe cameras were rolling, the actors were ready, the director was sweating, and the producer was a nervous wreck. The studio’s planned summer blockbuster, “Brash Bags the Bad Boys
Again”, was behind schedule, over budget, and the company was fending off a looming writers’ strike.EXT. L.A. CITY STREET - NIGHTEmergency vehicle lights are flashing. The beautiful Honey Muffin, in full police garb, leans over a man lying on the sidewalk. Brash Bradford approaches...

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“Defenestraphobia Moves in Next Door” by Murray Burns

Defenestraphobia Moves in Next Door(Satirical references to certain phobias; indelicate treatment of the subject of "plus- size" people.) The day after the “For Sale” sign came down, a crew was at the two-story colonial boarding up all the windows. Kenny, the keen-eyed neighbor next door, couldn’t help but notice.“Margie, take a look-see on what’s going on next door. The new owner is having all the windows boarded up.”“What? Oh, my God, that is strange....

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“The Dehumanization of Adam Longtree” by Murray Burns

The Dehumanization of Adam Longtree(Language.) 1. White-collar criminals out on bond get to wear white-collar attire to court. Adam Longtree’s attorney, a salaried Public Defender with a questionable commitment to the task, had him dressed in a dark blue suit with a white shirt and a bright red tie. Add clean-shaven, with every hair in place, and an endearing smile, Adam looked more like a figurine on top of a wedding cake than a hardened criminal. Unfortunately for Adam, the jury base...

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Author bio

Dartmouth, then Law School followed by years in mind-numbing law practice; now have more time to write. "Brevity is the soul of wit."

Shortlisted 2 stories ⭐

Contest #195
A Simple Act of Kindness – read story
Contest #170
The Rosary – read story