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Discover weekly, the best short stories

Looking for a steady supply of funny short stories? Every week thousands of writers submit stories to our writing contest.

8560+ Funny Short Stories to read

Submitted by writers on Reedsy Prompts to our weekly writing contest. The world can get dreary and overwhelming, so when you’re looking to have a good laugh, take a scroll through our free collection of funny short stories.

Funny Short Stories – Page 570 of 571

The Witches' Thanksgiving

Submitted to Contest #17

“Well, well, well. Look who the cat dragged in?” Cynthia, the oldest witch, licked her fingers after she bit into her drumstick. She picked at her tangled gray hair. “What do you know, there’s my wand." “This is quite unexpected.” Samantha, the prettiest of the three witches, let go of her floating fork. She straightened her black skirt and turned to look at the cat. “Smells human and very fleshly,” sniffed Martha, the mature one, who rose up and pulled the front door wide open for the cat. Tom, the family black cat, lugged th...

11 likes 1 comment 1
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Secrets of the Assassin

Submitted to Contest #15

It was all he could do to hold in his bark of laughter, leaning against the walls of the fortress, gripping his sides in a struggle to suppress his mirth. Yti quirked an eyebrow, his countenance not reflecting the same level of joyous amusement Wren's did.  "Is this entertaining to you?" he demanded, pursing his lips, his dark brows creasing with the words.  Slapping his knee, what giggles Wren had managed to hide flooded out, echoing through the dark marble halls. "No," he spluttered, straightening at the stern look Yti ...

27 likes 0 comments 0
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On the Roof Never Dancing Ever Again

Submitted to Contest #11

Mommy didn’t let me out of the car for five minutes after we got there. Daddy said it was because I’d been screaming I WANT A WOMBAT FULL OF GRILLED CHEESE for lunch the whole way there. So I need to stay inside to learn to be quiet.But that wasn’t my fault, right? I DID want a wombat full of grilled cheese for lunch-- oh no, it’s that creepy man with the squirrel on his chin. He keeps smiling at me. I hate him.I spent my five minutes drawing Norse gods on the frosted windows and trying to avoid looking at the squirrel-man.Mommy says it’s Un...

35 likes 5 comments 5
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Wolf Aaron and the Wild Sceptre

Shortlisted for Contest #10 ⭐️

He was a stranger, and he was strange. He had thick black hair and spiky handwriting and he stuttered.He was an odd one out, and he didn’t know if he was loved.His name was Aaron.Aaron was young, with strong fingernails and a typing score of two hundred words a minute. He didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life. He was in the tenth grade and he was a shunned oddball.Poor Aaron. He did not talk very much. He had red, scarred fingers from a long-ago fire, and though he was smart, not many of the kids knew it, because he kept his mouth s...

46 likes 3 comments 3
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When is a word not a word?

Submitted to Contest #7

“That is not a word!”“Oh yes, it is!”“I bet it’s not in the dictionary?”“Have a look then.”A thick book was dragged from the shelf, skinny pages leafed through.“See it’s not there.”“You are looking in the wrong place.”“Ow is not a word!”“It is in the Thai dictionary!” Tom the younger of the twins sniggered at his brother. Tim lashed out, missed.The twins glared at each other. Only their mother could tell them apart, and she hated telling them off. “Now, now boys give it a break. Words are nothing to argue over.”“But Mum, this ...

9 likes 2 comments 2
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Get Even

Submitted to Contest #7

“What about the homework, Magnus?”“Well, I trust you are more than capable of finishing it after we come back from the party, Agatha,” Magnus says, holding the third lipstick, rolls her eyes, inspects herself in the mirror, applies. “How do I look?” “Hideous.” “Now, now it’s not the time to sulk. Oh, you’re right though,” Magnus rummages the vanity drawer for the ideal lipstick color for the evening.“Magnus, Magnus! Look at me, we have finals tomorrow!” Agatha’s on the verge of tears, she’s always been the responsible one, and for the life o...

5 likes 1 comment 1
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The Comicbook Kid

Submitted to Contest #7

1Ralph’s parents were never the same after they died. They didn’t need to eat anymore, which was a bit of an issue. It meant they often forgot his meals, so that he had to learn to cook for himself. The food was a bit… dodgy, at first, and the kitchen had almost gone up in flames on more than one occasion. But Ralph was getting better at it.They could also walk through walls. And float upwards through the floor. Or out through the ceiling. When they were talking to him, they tended to disappear beyond a physical boundary mid-sentence, leavin...

55 likes 15 comments 15
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To hell with Hollywood

Submitted to Contest #7

You won’t believe your eyes, I’m willing to bet. A letter in your mail! Who still writes today? I can imagine you from here: “A pervert. He saw me in a movie and he's polishing his whistle while thinking about me, that disgusting old man.” You wouldn't be wrong, at least for the “old man” part. I’m at the end of the line. But that's another story. My lawyer, a brat of not even thirty, wanted me to contact you by e-mail or phone. “That's the way it is now, Mr. Davis,” I said no. Well, to be very precise, I said, “Shit”. I wanted to talk to yo...

7 likes 1 comment 1
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A Killer Friendship

Submitted to Contest #7

John had been driving home from his class reunion for hours, and though he would never admit this to his wife, he had somehow gotten himself completely lost. He had very little sense of direction as it was, and he relied heavily on his phone’s GPS to get him just about anywhere. The current problem was that the GPS just kept rerouting and rerouting and taking him down so many side streets and backroads that he was now driving down a winding road surrounded by endless trees on either side. He knew for a fact he hadn’t driven down a road like ...

19 likes 4 comments 4
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Change Your Mind

Submitted to Contest #7

“Hello, my name’s Toby,” said the man wearing a navy blue suit with tawny shoes that matched his wrist watch and belt. “Hello Toby.” Mumbled the other five voices in monotonous unison. Toby had onyx shaded hair that was slicked back, a cleanly shaven face, a glistening white collared shirt, and cyan tie - littered with white flowers - that was yanked against his trachea. He stood with his shoulders back, looked out at the people around him, and a small smirk crawled across his face. “Long time fan, first time attendee. Out of curiosity, woul...

5 likes 0 comments 0
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Ice Cream

Submitted to Contest #7

By anybody’s measure he was not intelligent. He was incapable of making informed decisions or conclusions. There wasn’t a subject in which he was versed. Just nonsense and blank space in his mind. At a young age he was put in classes with the other slow learners. Him and the others worked at a slower pace and covered less subject matter than the rest of the students. He knew of his enrollment in the special classes, it’s not like anyone tried to hide it. It didn’t matter to him anyway. Throughout his or her life, a mentally deficient person ...

7 likes 0 comments 0
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Randomly Random

Submitted to Contest #7

Even as Daisy sat comfortably on the chair, the jittery feeling in her stomach never subsided. It had a mind of its own, an involuntary, uneasy feeling that wrapped itself around her belly as soon as she sat on that chair. It was the butterflies in her stomach, she thought, which had multiplied by the minute. She couldn’t wait any longer. The day has finally arrived, but he still has not. In fact, he was already ten minutes late.A rapid knock came from the door, followed by the sound of clicking and the door opening. The man was six foot tal...

7 likes 0 comments 0
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A Love so True

Submitted to Contest #7

    Never in my life have I seen anyone so miserable. A rat half-drowned in fish broth staring down a hungry cat would have a more pleasant demeanor than this man trudging down the road. A long journey can do that, I’ve seen many grave looks come through my father’s inn, but this wins first prize for graveyard gloom.    “Aren’t musicians are supposed to be merry? But you look like you’ve split your fiddle.” I greet the man as I emerge from the woods; three rabbits hung over my shoulder. Game has been scarce this...

9 likes 1 comment 1
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The First Date

Submitted to Contest #7

“Reservations under Tom Metzger.” “Perfect. This way Mr. Metzger.” The host led the couple to a small table covered in white linen. A short candle illuminated the table in a romantic glow.  Tom pulled out the chair for his date and she meekly thanked him and smiled shyly as she watched him sit down and pull his own chair in closer. They smiled at each other, but the tension was surely unbearable. A restrained clearing of his throat finally broke the silence.“So,” Tom focused on maintaining eye contact with the woman across from him...

19 likes 5 comments 5
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Monsters of Doubt

Submitted to Contest #7

 “Oh no. George prefers red wine.” “No, no, I'll try the white.” “You never drink white wine!” “Well I like to be able to change my mind.” George took the offered glass. “You never drink white wine.” Marjorie huffed. And it was true George never drank white wine, especially not the sweet white that the Abercrombies served. He disliked it intensely. He might be predictable, he might never change his habits but he wanted the freedom to do so if the fancy took him. “No thank you,” he would say, if asked directly. “I prefer red wine, dry ...

8 likes 1 comment 1
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RBE | Illustrated Short Stories | 2024-06

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