160 comments

Drama Fantasy

Oh, hello. Obviously if you’re here to talk to me, you’ve hit rock bottom. That’s a shame, but it’s not my problem. I destroyed myself. You’re about to if you leave, so don’t get out of your chair. Just because I’m in these handcuffs doesn’t mean I’m an idiot. If you’re anything like me, you’re going to want to listen to what I have to say. 

I was born with a curse. A curse that kept me from deceiving anyone. I couldn’t lie, and I still can’t now. Like a noose around my throat, only tightening when I tried to lie. I couldn’t even make a half-truth or a white lie to protect someone. I was a prince, born to be rich, famous, and successful. But the kingdom I was meant to rule was built on a lie, and therefore I was an outcast. I wasn’t able to uphold the lie and that became my downfall. My mother and father kept me locked in my bedroom. I never saw my people, the people I was born to rule, because they were young and they didn’t want me to reveal anything to anyone, and I barely ever saw them, either. It drove me crazy to be alone all the time. I had no friends and no way out of my room. After a while, I broke out of my bedroom, shattering my window. But I was young… and stupid, and I jumped, half hoping the fall would kill me. It didn’t, clearly. It did shatter all the bones in my leg, though, and when a guard (who didn’t even know I existed, by the way) found my lying there and brought me to the apothecary. My parents were mortified that I tried to escape and tripled my security. I begged them to let me go. I begged them to let me go out and meet some people my age, and I told them that I didn’t even know anything about our kingdom setup. But they didn’t believe me. They threw me into my cage and everything became like it had been. 

This time, I refused to go down without a fight. 

They gave me books. Books on magic, and spells, and everyday tricks like how to pick a lock and how to wield a sword. I broke my bookcase apart into small pieces against the cobblestone wall and used them to practice throwing knives, and by the time I was sixteen, I was more skilled with weaponry than anyone in the kingdom, according to my guard, who watched me through the glass in my door. 

One night, I escaped again, only cracking a small portion of the glass, and tied all my bedsheets and blankets together so I slid to the grass safely. Then I went to the blacksmith and bought a diamond sword after I explained to him who I was, which then I promptly killed him with. Don’t worry, he didn’t suffer. But he wasn’t my only victim that night. 

I stole five metal daggers as well, and snuck back into the palace, this time smashing open the front gate. I ended the lives of two guards who tried to stop me and cleaned the daggers as I walked, ducking in and out of rooms throughout the castle in search of my parents. 

Finally, I found them. 

They were scared. They didn’t recognize me- the last time I had met them, I was a foolish, plump, ten year old boy. Then there I stood before them; tall, regal, and cold. I asked my father why he had done what he did to me and told him that it was all his fault that I did this. 

The crunch of metal into his chest still rings in my ears. 

My mother… she was different. She explained. She told me that my father built the kingdom up on a lie as his father had instructed, and he built it very fragile. I remember the tear tracks that glistened on her face in the moonlight as she begged for her life. She claimed she had always loved me. 

I ended her faster than my father. She had only been an accomplice. 

The next morning, I took control of the kingdom. I broke down the entire country and rebuilt it from the ashes. But many didn’t like my rule, and there was an uprising against me. And since my father’s death, all of our allies had abandoned us, I was overthrown and nearly beaten to death by the angry people. 

But then… Aimee. 

She was beautiful. She saved me from the peasants and we escaped to a distant part of the country. And I was happy. I put away my daggers and my sword and embraced her. I can still remember the sweet smell of her hair- like fresh picked flowers from the meadow. She had long caramel colored hair and hazel eyes that sparkled when she looked at me. I loved her more than life itself, and she loved me too. We lived in a little cottage outside a small village for five years, and then she got sick. She became rail-thin and her soft olive skin turned dull and whitened. When she died, she died in my arms. I wrapped her body in flowers and buried her in the meadow, where she had loved to sing with the birds. 

Aimee. She brought me out of a dark place. And then the shadows returned, this time in the form of grief, not rage. 

I broke our house apart. All of her paintings that she worked on, her recipe books, her clothes, everything, really- were thrown into a huge fire that ate up our house too. I became homeless and was forced to return to the kingdom to find peasant work. I worked cleaning a barn and I lived among the pigs as payment. The owners were poor and only fed me one loaf of stale bread in a week. I grew grimy and dirty and the only clothes I had in my possession were two loincloths and some old, worn sandals. 

One day I quit my job and went into the regal part of the kingdom and I killed the new blacksmith with my bare hands  in the back of his shop. I disposed of his body in the river and cleaned myself in his house and fixed myself up, then started my life as a lowly blacksmith, selling weaponry and other things to the people. Only one problem- after I ran out of supplies, I had to go out of business. I didn’t know how to make tools! But I did save some daggers and another sword, my favorite weapons, for my latest conquest. 

The new king they had dragged in was called Sebastian. He was fair, as far as I knew, and when I entered the castle, he did his best to hide his fear. I can still remember our conversation- 

“Matthias. I thought you ran off with the girl, Aimee.” 

“I did. She’s passed.” 

He bit his lip. I think he was deciding whether or not to ask if I killed her, but he changed his mind. “So, what’s brought you here?” 

“The throne. I want my crown back.” 

His fingers were white as he gripped the sword at his hip, his eyes wide. “I’m afraid not. I would be happy to give you a job, to let you stay here- but if I hand over the crown, there’ll be mutiny. Just like before. I’m sorry.” 

“No you’re not. Just hand over my crown, Sebastian.” 

“I can’t.” 

I had begun to grow impatient with perfect, patient, just Sebastian. He did really seem sorry, though. And he was smart enough to wear a breastplate, which took the full force of my sword. 

I yanked it out, and Sebastian smiled softly. “I learned from your father’s mistakes.” 

And then, poof, the guards were upon me. 

They locked me up again and set me here. All by myself on an old metal boat, with enough food and supplies to last me two weeks and a WARNING note stapled to my shirt. Some people found me as I arrived on a beach and started blabbing about how I must have escaped from what they called the “Bermuda Triangle”? I’m assuming you know what that is. And now, after reading all of the warning labels, they shipped me here. Los Angeles County Prison. And you’ve come here because you can’t lie either, yes? Or you’re very bad at it? 

It isn’t good to lie, my friend. I learned that after the downfall of my father’s kingdom. But sometimes, twisting the truth just a little is necessary. Or you’ll find yourself in a mudslide to crap.

January 12, 2021 03:07

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160 comments

02:11 Jan 14, 2021

Oh wow, that was super good! I totally loved it:) However, I do wish you would elaborate a little more on some of the characters, and how he managed to get across the ocean. Other than that, this is amazing!!!

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Megan Sutherland
02:38 Jan 14, 2021

Thank you, Zen!!! (is that okay as a title? hehe)

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14:50 Jan 14, 2021

Totally:)

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14:50 Jan 14, 2021

Totally:)

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wonderful story good job :) 🤍

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Megan Sutherland
16:53 Jan 12, 2021

Thank you, Blue!!! Haha do you mind being called that?

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you're welcome i dont mind you calling me Blue

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Amaya .
22:52 Jan 14, 2021

Megan! What's going on? Thank goodness I randomly decided to check your account today, on Jan 14th. I understand and thanks for giving me time to say bye! I love you and I'll miss you even though we could've been so much closer than we are :(

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Megan Sutherland
22:59 Jan 14, 2021

Thank you Amaya <3333

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Raelynn Wei
16:46 Jan 14, 2021

Oh no, Megan! I'm so sorry that you have to leave Reedsy, we'll all miss you😢😭😭

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Megan Sutherland
18:56 Jan 14, 2021

Thanks Lily :):

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Raelynn Wei
19:08 Jan 14, 2021

Sorry that you keep losing karma points, that's really horrible.

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Oh no Megan you’re leaving?! 😭 I’m so sorry you keep be downvoted and have to leave...we’ll miss you 😣🥲

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Megan Sutherland
13:34 Jan 14, 2021

Thanks Aerin :):

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13:28 Jan 14, 2021

Here's my short notes: First, you tell the entire story instead of showing it. Showing gives your writing much more power. (I will say you did show Mathias's personality and development through his actions, instead of telling them, which was good) Second note. Because the story is told in a sparse, drifting way, we're unable to connect with the main character. We know intellectually why he had to do the things he did--because he tells us--but we don't know why emotionally. We can't feel it. To fix this, I would do research into something c...

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13:28 Jan 14, 2021

That ended up being way too long.

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Megan Sutherland
13:33 Jan 14, 2021

No, no, no, it's fineeeeeee. Thank you! I will take it into account working on my novel. :)

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13:36 Jan 14, 2021

Working on a novel project? Nice. What's it about?

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Megan Sutherland
13:45 Jan 14, 2021

It's... a long story XD Taking in that fantasy genre 😎 It's about a girl who's mom just died and she's super frustrated and she finds an escape in writing and creates this whole new world and kinda wishes it were real but then it is and she's magically transported there but it's evolved since she worked on it and now there's this huge dark force that she didn't create and she has to defeat it before she can get home.

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15:43 Jan 14, 2021

Neat! I love writing fantasy as well--it's my favorite genre. How far have you gotten on your book? Right now, the project I'm working on is a Christian fantasy/adventure story. It was originally meant to be an allegory of the Biblical Apostle Paul, but has since spun off on it's own as I've gotten into it. ;)

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13:18 Jan 14, 2021

I feel so awful that I'm coming on a day before you said you were going to leave... I really don't want you to! I only just found a great writer like you and you want to leave just because some spammers can't take losing? Still... a story this dark can only come from some inner imbalance.

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Megan Sutherland
13:24 Jan 14, 2021

Lol, that last part made me laugh. I'm not depressed or anything, don't worry. That was just how I felt when I was writing the story. I do most of my best writing when I'm mad or sad, because then writing is an escape. I'm leaving for two reasons. One, my likes and points have been steadily decreasing, which makes me think that my writing has gotten worse and I want to fix it. Two, I don't like that it's almost become an obsession for me to be on here. Like, I'm checking it every ten minutes. I probably won't be gone forever, and I'll stil...

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. .
13:17 Jan 14, 2021

Meg, we need to talk. WHY ARE YOU LEAVING??

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Megan Sutherland
13:21 Jan 14, 2021

*sigh* why is everyone up this earlyyyyyy Because of two reasons. One: I am sick of losing points and seeing the steady dislike for my stories. Two: I am on here too much waiting for replies to comments that don't exist.

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. .
13:22 Jan 14, 2021

One: well... that sucks... do you need upvotes?? two: well... maybe set a time for reedsy?

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Megan Sutherland
13:27 Jan 14, 2021

One: I honestly don't see the point in upvotes and I never have. They'll just get taken away again. Two: I don't know. I've seen a steady not-liking of my stories. So, yeah. That and the whole I'm honestly kind of obsessed with this. I'll be on every couple of weeks or so for a little while, but I'll no longer be submitting. All of my stories will remain posted.

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. .
13:28 Jan 14, 2021

... okay. That's too bad, because we've lost another amazing author, but I understand your reasons. Bye bye, Haven :(

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Megan Sutherland
13:31 Jan 14, 2021

I'm not going till tmrw. One more among us today? For old times' sake? ;)

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Thom Brodkin
13:17 Jan 14, 2021

I love the way you fulfilled the prompt. I was afraid of getting bogged down in opportunities to lie and then telling the truth. You presented it as absolute reality and dealt with the consequences of the issue. Really brilliant. I have to say, you belong on Reedsy because you have stories to tell. Votes are nice but being heard and being read are why you need to be here. Don’t let the down voters win. I hope you change your mind and stick it out. I want to read more of your stories. If you have a moment I wrote one this week called “The O...

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Megan Sutherland
13:20 Jan 14, 2021

Sure, and thank you! I don't know. I'm thinking about it but my mind is pretty made up. It's just been a gradual thing, and it's an insecurity for me, really, knowing that someone anonymous is just knocking me down for no reason. And I am also leaving because this website takes up too much time for me, and it's almost like an obsession.

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Thom Brodkin
13:41 Jan 14, 2021

You’ll be missed.

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Megan Sutherland
13:47 Jan 14, 2021

Thanks

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. .
13:20 Jan 12, 2021

YASSS MEGAN!!!! I WOULD ONLY RECOMMEND ADDING EMOTION OR SOME ORNAMENTAL ELEMENT TO YOUR 'I AM' AND 'I WANT' AND 'I DID' SENTENCES!!! GREAT STORY I WAS SO CAPTIVATED!!!

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Megan Sutherland
16:53 Jan 12, 2021

THANK YOU LUKE!!!!

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. .
16:54 Jan 12, 2021

NO PROBBBBBB

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Megan Sutherland
16:54 Jan 12, 2021

AYYYYYY WE'RE ON AT THE SAME TIME!!!

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. .
16:56 Jan 12, 2021

YASSS WE AREEEE WANNA PLAY AMONG US??

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Megan Sutherland
16:57 Jan 12, 2021

YASS BUT DOES LIKE 12:30 WORK? I HAFTA EAT. DO YOU WANNA PLAY THEN WITH ME AND MY FRIEND?

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wow, powerful. The hook was priceless, and that's what has me here in this apparent prison, Matthias. Very well written. You made it seem like he was re-telling a story, using words like had, learned, was, and much more. It was very compelling and kept me on the edge of my seat. Great great job! L.W.

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Megan Sutherland
00:02 Apr 17, 2021

Thank you so much, Wolf!!!

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np, Meg :)

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Chris Wagner
21:44 Jan 21, 2021

The writing was clean, nothing distracting on that end. The steady stream of preposterous situations tied in well with the ending. I think you'd be able to fit more vivid description into the story if it didn't cover such an epic arc, but it works well with the whole joke of the guy telling what amounts to a huge fib claiming to always tell the truth. Overall pretty good

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Megan Sutherland
22:51 Jan 21, 2021

Thank you so much!

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Colin Devonshire
06:21 Jan 21, 2021

Brilliant story, well done.

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Megan Sutherland
10:58 Jan 21, 2021

Thank you, Colin!

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Mazie Gray
20:49 Jan 20, 2021

Woah! This was definitely one of your indescribable pieces. It was so beautiful, and I loved and enjoyed reading it. You did a wonderful job writing it. Great job! :D -Brooke

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Megan Sutherland
00:24 Jan 21, 2021

Thank youuuuuuuu <3

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Mazie Gray
15:13 Jan 21, 2021

You're welcomeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee <3 You know who I am right lol

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Megan Sutherland
18:24 Jan 21, 2021

Yes hahahaha

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Mazie Gray
18:29 Jan 21, 2021

XDDDDDDDDDDDDD

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Raelynn Wei
17:34 Jan 15, 2021

Hey, Megan. I just wanted to let you know that I published a story you 𝘮𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 want to check out... ;)

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Megan Sutherland
17:49 Jan 15, 2021

Okay I will!!

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Raelynn Wei
06:24 Jan 15, 2021

Are you staying? Are you staying? Please say you're staying!!

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Megan Sutherland
13:03 Jan 15, 2021

ssssssssssssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hehe

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Amaya .
03:06 Jan 15, 2021

WAIT ARE YOU NOT LEAVING?!?!

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Megan Sutherland
13:03 Jan 15, 2021

shshsshshshhhshshsshsshshshshshhshshshs hehe

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Amaya .
17:37 Jan 15, 2021

LIDSKJFDILKFSJL YAYYY

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01:05 Jan 15, 2021

OH NOOO! YOU’RE LEAVING?! I know I don’t know you all that well and we’ve talked, like, once, but I still don’t want you to go! DX Downvoters are stupid idiots who deserve to have their accounts deleted. Ohhh, now I’m really mad... And sad... Well, if you’re leaving, then I guess I can’t stop you... But all I have to say is: Please come back sometimes?! We may not be all that good of friends, but I know you mean a lot to many people on here. And we will all miss you like crazy... DX

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Megan Sutherland
01:44 Jan 15, 2021

Thank you Fearless Fox :): I'll be back, don't worry Just not for a while

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01:46 Jan 15, 2021

Aw, ok... But we’ll miss you! (Oh, and sorry for spamming you with notifs. I read your stories a little while ago, but then I may or may not’ve forgotten to like them... XD)

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Megan Sutherland
01:46 Jan 15, 2021

There were likes XD thank you

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15:30 Jan 15, 2021

Can I just say AWWWWW! I’M ON YOUR BIO?! ♡

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Megan Sutherland
15:30 Jan 15, 2021

YASSSS HOW COULD I NOT PUT YOU IN THERE FEARLESS?

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Kate Reynolds
23:08 Jan 14, 2021

Wow. This story was fantastic! The details were amazing!!! I was so captivated while reading this!!! Great job! :D Also, I saw your bio. I don't think we've ever gotten to know each other but you seem like a really nice person! I am sorry that down voters are making you leave Reedsy, and we will all miss you! Best of luck in your writing journey!!!!!!!!! <333

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Megan Sutherland
01:43 Jan 15, 2021

Thank you Kate :)

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Kate Reynolds
01:44 Jan 15, 2021

Anytime! It was a pleasure reading your stories!!!

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Sapphire ~♚
22:40 Jan 14, 2021

I know we don't know each other much, but I've heard of you A LOT! You seem to be a nice. caring person and an AWESOME writer. It's gonna be sad to lose another great author. I wish there was no such thing as downvoting, and points should only be earned by stories. I'm so sorry you lost so many points :(( I'm sorry you are leaving Reedsy. I wish you well on your writing journey :)

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Megan Sutherland
22:58 Jan 14, 2021

Thank you <3

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