leave me here?
god, i miss you
why do i miss you?
i thought i could do this
i thought i was fine with me
but now you’re gone and i don’t know
don’t know what to do; you were my all
i was wrapped up in what you said of me
can’t you see that what i’ve done was all for you?
my time, my worth, my love, i gave them free
and when you left, you took them with you
you left me here, this world to rot
it’s like you made the sun shine
now the wind knots my hair
and the clouds are dark
rain fills my shoes
tears too, but
i was wrong
you know what, no
that is what you want
but i will stand my ground
i will not crawl back to you
you can not make me turn my will
I’ll be as stiff as you claim you are
all of my days, i will run far from you
when i stop, i’ll be so high you can’t reach me
you will have to crawl to me on your knees
and then beg for me to take you back
till then i will stand in this storm
i don’t care how rough it’ll get
let this noise shake the earth
the light pierce my eyes
to show all things
and then go.
give me time
why did you leave?
hear me shout my hate
let me scream what i feel
let me tell you what i think
you are so great, so high, so far
or so you think. i will prove you wrong
my words will make you fall in to my grasp
and then i want to bring you down here with me
so that you can know just how this all feels
to lay face down in the cold wet grass
and rip the turf up with your hands
your clothes stuck to your skin
while the wind goes mad
and my eyes glow
and it’s cold
it’s not worth
all that i give
and if they ask me
i will say you left me
and i don’t care from now on
so now you can go on your way
stop with the pleas for me to come back
your voice just hurts my ears, i’ll turn it off
your words will stay in a vault with the key lost
i’ll do just fine on my own path, you’ll see
go back to your light, i like this dark
a weird flash now and then is fine
i can see just what i want
i will breathe in this rain
i will walk through mud
and just you watch
i’ll learn how.
here i am
i can go on
see, i don’t need you
then why do i still talk?
i just talk to my self now
i am more than you said you were
for i’m kind, i have sense, i am just
you gave me gifts, but i can give me more
your laws are in my past, i can make my own
i make my own up and down, good and bad
and you can not tell me what to do
so i will go on with my life
but i fight on in this storm
and i have fought so hard
yet it still goes on
it does not stop
i am stuck.
i came back
i can’t do this
i’ll say i was wrong
you did not leave me here
i’ll say it was me who left
and it’s the most true thing i’ve said
i want back the light you gave my life
I am done with all this dark all the time
i’m sick of this fight that i fight on my own
i’m sick of this brawl that i can not win
i’m sick of my self and my own tries
my hands are not as big as yours
i was not made to guide wind
i can not scold the rain
i can’t stop the sound
i still can’t see
but i know
cry so loud?
i said i’m wrong
so why do you scream?
can’t i pay my own debt?
why must you feel all this pain?
how can you stoop to love me so?
i can not watch you die in my stead
but yet you do it, and what have you done?
the world’s turned on its head with your love for me
and i’m scared i might fall off while it spins.
the storm gets more thick. i might die too.
the ground on which my feet stand sways
while the skies shake in full wrath
the rain turns red with blood
my tongue can taste it
it chokes my throat
soaks my skin
i don’t know
i don’t get how
but now here you are
i know you will not leave
and that i will stay with you
you will keep me safe by your side
and i’ll walk with you in peace through death
for naught can pull you from me. we are bound.
you have sworn an oath to me. your word is sure.
my soul is twined with yours in cords of blood
you hold out your hands and calm the storm
those nail pierced hands can kill my storm
the clouds part when we walk through
and now the sun does shine
i am dry and warm
the wind is gone
i can breathe.
i fought god
and it was tough
for he is so strong
but i learned he is good
he does not leave those he loves
and when we run, he will chase us.
he chased me up to the gates of hell
he ran for me while i ran for my doom
he raced me while my steps traced the path to death
he proved his love while i spit in his face
he gave his all to mend what i’ve done
and then he freed me from my storm
he saved me from what i’d made.
to fight god is to lose
but he is so good
that to fight him
is to win.