When it rains, who's poor?

“As you can see here on the Doppler radar, this is going to be a steady rain. It is holding over the bi-state area for a few days, providing us with that much needed cash influx to rejuvenate the local economy. So, get out there and get rich, and don’t forget to save for those not so rainy days. The drought is over! This is Steve Stephenson with your channel 8 weather.”

Bill Talbert, his wife Edna, and three children had stopped to eat lunch at their favorite fast-food establishment after Josie’s softball game that morning. That’s when the rain started.

It was a few ones at first, nothing heavy. Then came the fives and then the tens. The next thing they knew, it was pouring twenties with a mix of fifties and hundreds. The Talbert’s swept their unfinished meals into their arms and ran for the car. They had just spent the last of their money on lunch because they knew a storm front was coming in.

Bill and Edna hung out their windows pulling bills off the windshield as they swerved through traffic on their way home. Bill was so distracted pulling in money, he ran a stop light and nearly got t-boned to the sounds of angry yells and obnoxious horns.

Bill turned into the driveway where he left the car and opened the garage. The family raced to collect their tools. The night before, Bill and Edna spread out large tarps in the back yard so all they would have to do is grab the corners and drag them into the garage. That left the front yard. Bill and Edna grabbed the four big blue barrels with the tops cut off and got them outside. Josie started strategically setting up the twenty-five five-gallon buckets while the younger two, Danny and Squirrel, started raking money into bags.

The buckets filled up fast. Bill, Edna, and Josie ran back and forth dumping money on the garage floor as the little ones frantically raked. They worked fast but the money came down in busted bales. They had to hurry. They lose whatever blows off their property, and they lost a lot during the last rain, right before the drought. Edna and Squirrel were sick, needing their rest, so Bill figured it could wait. The winds picked up and, by what he figures, he lost eighty percent of what was theirs.

The young ones were tiring and getting frustrated with getting nowhere, so Edna sent Josie to rake as her and Bill focused on dumping the barrels in the garage.

The bills started dropping heavier. There was a gust of wind. Bill heard his windshield crack.

“Quarters! Everyone inside!”

They all ran into the house as the storm picked up in intensity. The clanking of quarters was like the world's biggest jackpot. They could smell, even taste the metal in the air. It was like tiny hammers on the roof; little knives on the car. Bill and Edna watched helplessly from the window. The barrels and buckets were blown over. Their contents spilled out onto the ground, blowing away.

“Great,” Edna sobbed, “It’s all blowing away.”

“Look,” said Danny as he points out the window.

Five-year-old Squirrel had thrown on her bicycle helmet and ran out into the storm to set the buckets back up.

“Squirrel,” her mother shouted, in a panic.

She could hear her daughter scream as quarters hit her from every direction and watched as Squirrel climbed into one of the overturned barrels.

 Bill threw a jacket over his head and ran out outside.

“Hey, Squirrel. Do you want to go inside?”

“Yeah,” she said with a sniffle and glossy eyes.

She wrapped her arms around her father's neck. He stood up, shielding them with the jacket, and ran inside.”

“Mary Elizabeth Talbert, what on Earth were you thinking,” Edna scolded as she hugged her daughter, checking all her little bruises.

“I thought I could help.”

“You scared me to death,” Edna told her. “Next time you ask mommy or daddy.”

The hail shortly thereafter stopped. Like clockwork, all up and down Vincent Street, families came out of their homes and stepped into the downpour of cash to resume their work. The work was harder, much heavier now that quarters were involved. The barrels, even though most of their contents had spilled out, were too heavy for one person to move due to the number of quarters weighing them down. Bill and Edna twisted and turned them, walking them along until they could get them emptied into the garage. Danny, who was eight, traded his rake for a shovel and let his sisters rake up the coins while he shoveled them into the buckets, which he could only fill a quarter of the way full. Even then Josie had to use both hands to carry the buckets to the garage.

“Bill, why don’t you take some of this money and run into town and grab us a wheelbarrow. All this change is breaking our backs,” Edna suggested.

Bill took his recently beaten-up car into town where he was only one of a few people out driving. He caught the owner of the hardware store just as he was getting ready to leave. He talked him into letting him make a quick purchase; his last wheelbarrow, and some rope to tie it to the top of the car.

Once they had the wheelbarrow, the pace picked up. Bills fell into the buckets and barrels while everyone focused on raking up the coins. All the coins ruined Bills idea for the tarps. They weren’t going to budge regardless of how many people were pulling. The back yard was fenced in, so he figured he could wait until the weather cleared up. The sun began to set. Everyone was hungry, tired, and sore. They decided to retire for the evening, closing the garage door, and heading inside for dinner.

The next morning, it was only drizzling a light but steady flow of ones. Bill and Edna stood at the window in their robes, sipping their coffee, dreading another day’s work as they stared at piles of cash. They almost didn’t have the heart to wake the kids. Almost.

The Talbert’s cabinets had been close to bare for days. They, like so many others, struggled through the drought after only a quick, light rain, and there was also Bill’s blunder. But there was always oatmeal, which is what they had to start the day. The kids moaned and groaned, saying they should have enough already, but how much is enough when you never know when it’s going to rain. They threw on their clothes, grabbed their rakes, and started collecting their money.