The Welcoming

I was in a dreamlike state. Words appeared before my very eyes. Sentences sailed on endlessly through the air, but still, I never flinched, or at least not until the surrounding solid walls began breathing. Yet, I just could not believe all the beautiful colors. It felt as if I was in a wonderland. Then suddenly, my hands began pulsating and glowing, while at the same time all that was tangible moved, and all that was audible echoed.

   While turning over to lie upon my back, I sluggishly closed my eyes. Instantly I observed many sharp colors of uninterrupted streams and shapes surging before my inner eyelids. Figures were rearranging into sparkling spirals of geometric patterns, opening and closing, then bursting into colors. Upon opening my eyes I viewed the ceiling, then suddenly there was no ceiling. I sighted countless stars twinkling in the sky. While gazing up at these stars, the sky became a giant star-filled kaleidoscope. The next thing I knew, I was weightlessly floating high up inside this sky. It felt elating to be looking downward at my physical body. But then, a moment later, I was back inside my physical body, wondering what was and wasn’t real. I soon sat up and looked about the jail cell.

   “But, what are these bugs doing crawling on me?”

   As I looked around, the entire room became a profusion of swirling vibrant colors. The walls continued breathing, while also now emitting howling sounds. Shifting my head back and forth, I slowly observed a room where snakes lurked in every corner, each one hissing in rhythm. I could see the rhythm, it was a cacophony of crimson, the color of blood. My subconscious became my foreground. All internal conflicts were unmercifully haunting me, one hundred fold. I had no idea who, or what I was! I could not feel my body. What was my body? Upon the benches skeletons sat holding hands. They stood up and walked towards me, their bones rattling, their teeth chattering, their eyes spinning while turning into mirrors. I could see myself in their eyes. I looked scared, I was scared, I was horrified – uncontrollably shivering, devoid of reality! I ran into the gooey melting cell door screaming:

    “Jesus, Jesus! – Help me! – They’re attacking me…!”

   At a phenomenal speed the room was now pervasively spinning, around and around, faster and faster! I was standing dead center inside a kaleidoscopic tornado! I felt ill, squeamish, holding back my vomit! Cold chills synchronized while dancing up and down my arms until turning into giggling maggots! The kaleidoscopic tornado’s interior appeared as a multitude of giant, stacked, musical truck tires, all colorfully spinning while also gradually contracting, around and around, shrinking tighter and tighter, faster and faster, closer and closer, smaller and smaller! Had I entered Hell through a wormhole? Dark dimension, the black universe, perhaps I wasn’t coming back? An alluring apathetic face suddenly appeared out in front of me. Instinctively I knew whose face it was. I screamed out his name:

   “Death…!!! – No! No! – Dear God please help me! – Jesus! Jesus…!”

   The last thing I remember was my thinking, “Don’t Pass Out…!”

ONE HOUR LATER

   “Doctor Garfield, the patient appears to be waking up. Shall I administer more sedative?”

   “No, Nurse Carlin, more than a sufficient amount has already been administered. Any additional diazepam could promote adversity. The excessive amount of lysergic acid diethylamide found in his system would only continue counteracting, in alternating recessive increments, the sedative’s affect. We can expect the patient to slip in and out of consciousness. On the other hand, if we administer more diazepam, then once the LSD wears off, the side effects of the diazepam, in the worst-case scenario, could induce coma, cerebral paralysis, or possibly death. Diazepam is far more long acting than LSD.”

   “To what degree of an overdose did the patient incur?”

   “He tested positive for approximately six thousand micrograms of LSD-25, whereas two hundred micrograms of LSD-25 is considered a very strong dose. The patient had at least thirty times this amount in his system. The threshold for a psychotropic effect in humans is considered to be anywhere from twenty to thirty micrograms.”

   “Should I transfer him to a room?”

   “No, for now he’ll be committed into the psychiatric ward, at least for overnight. We should know by either tomorrow or Sunday whether the chemicals have worn off. When he awakens, at first he’ll be lethargic. He’ll probably experience incremental bouts, teetering between lethargical and maniacal peaks and valleys. The sedative can be expected to decrease his fears and anxieties, but it will not subdue his hallucinations and formications. Therefore, have him confined to a padded isolation chamber.”

   “I’ll see to it immediately. Presently orderlies Hanson and Stadler are at hand. I’ll have them transport the patient into psychiatrics. Oh, here they are now.” “Gentlemen, this patient is to be transported into psychiatrics and placed in padded isolation.” “Is there anything else, Doctor Garfield?”

   “Yes, make sure he’s delivered specifically to Doctor Clive, this is important, and Nurse Carlin, notify Dr. Clive of all pertinent information prior to the patient’s arrival.”

   “I’m dialing his extension as we speak.”

   Down the hall we went, my body stretched out aloft a long gurney, pushed and pulled into an elevator, until ultimately arriving on the fourth floor. Once inside the psychiatric ward, I was placed inside a padded isolation chamber.

   I awoke with absolutely no recollection of ever being in a hospital. I was not sure who or what I was. Many rudimentary ideas, such as days and hours, seemed foreign to me. I was far beyond lost, completely oblivious to location, with little conception of space, time, and person.

   Hovering above, beckoning me, a bright light shone. Was this the Sun? Had the very universe itself collapsed, or had I become the universe? Was I presently embarking on a mystical inner body experience, and from where did I learn this term? Or, perhaps I entered another dimension, one of those widely theorized alternant (Not Alternate) universes?

   My mind raced, possessing fragmented thoughts cluttered within fragmented thoughts. In defense of my knowledge of our universe expanding, I won’t move! I’ll let the universe, or perhaps I should say, I’ll let this alternant universe move without me, releasing me from its abduction, thus, methodically reinserting me back into my universe?

   Maybe I’m destined to wander aimlessly throughout eternity, lost inside this contorted realm, seemingly as contradicting as a colorful black hole? Now, if I could only activate my dormant hibernation genes, remaining idle throughout the infinite, vast light-years yet to come. I believe, then, even fate would stand to reason with the inevitable. I also believe that somewhere it must be written that I am destined to cheat eternity!

   My awakening! My epiphany! I am the universe! Omnipotent! Omnipresent! Transcending time! Transcending space, matter, dimension! Dimension? Hibernation! Hibernation? Shifting consciousness! Transcending time! I am time! Shifting consciousness? I am dimension! Shifting as I choose! What I choose! What I choose? I am space! Where I choose! Where I choose? I choose! I choose? I choose:

   “Sarah’s apartment!”

    Sarah’s apartment? I choose Sarah’s apartment! Remote viewing! Consciousness shifting! Inner projecting! Sarah’s bedroom! Heaven! Hell! Holistic body! Universal body! Sarah’s bedroom! Sarah’s bedroom? This is Sarah’s bedroom! I’m in Sarah’s bedroom! I am Sarah’s bedroom! The wall! I recognize the wall! I feel the wall, it’s solid! It’s soft! Sponge-like! Sponge-like? Think, think, think! What am I forgetting? Why can’t I remember? My memory is virtually powerless! I’ll lie down! I believe lying down helps one remember! The bed is soft, is this good? I can’t remember! I’m presently lying down, yet why do I suddenly recall the magnetic north? When my girlfriend Sarah returns home from work, she’ll remember! Yes, that’s it! In anticipation of sharing my inner body experience, I’m awaiting Sarah’s return! The alternant universe! Highly advanced mystics! I’m a highly advanced mystic? Where has my memory gone? Think, think! I can see myself! That’s Sarah’s bedroom mirror! Yes, her bedroom mirror lies ample feet before her bed, I remember! I’m so very drowsy, I’ll nap, sleep, sweet sleep! Is this a dream? Perhaps it’s someone else’s dream?

   Where am I? Did I awaken? There’s a pinhead size beam of light coming from the center of Sarah’s bedroom mirror. I approach the beam of light, covering it with my finger. When I remove my finger, the light returns! I’m scratching at the pinhole, progressively scraping away the mirror’s surface. The hole widens, so does the beam of light! My finger slips right through the hole! Is there a hole in the wall on the opposite side of the mirror? I now dismantle the mirror, removing it completely from the wall! Looking at the wall where the mirror had been, there is no hole! Looking behind the mirror, again there is no hole, only solid wood! How can this be? I begin frantically scraping away at the continually widening hole, until no portion of any mirror surface remains. This once mirror is now a hole in a wooded frame, with a solid wooden back. I’m confused? Holding the frame out before me, peering inside, I see only darkness! Lifting the frame above my head, lowering it until reaching my mid-thighs. Slowly dropping the frame upon the floor, my entire body slips on through! Strange feelings of entering yet another dimension! In my passing through the mirror, could I have entered our world’s parallel universe?

    Dwelling inside the looking glass, I lurk amongst a universal counter-realm of mirrored images! A world of opposite polarity, reflecting and countering my very existence! A parallel Sun brightly shines above me, thawing mountainous glaciers! Waterfalls flow into the sea, the deep purple sea! Melted oceans meet the shore! I wade upon the beach, endless purple ocean waves are crashing at my feet! I hear the seagulls! I smell the salt air! I walk with sinking footsteps as the pink sand swivels beneath! How large is the universe, the universe of all universes? What is God? Is God the universal universe? Walking, endlessly walking, my eyelids weighing heavily! I must sleep, sleep, deep sleep! I can sleep upon the infinite pink and purple beach!

    Sinking into the abyss, slumbering deeply, sporadically wavering, drifting in and out between light and solid sleep. I’m dreaming of flying, the vibrations come, very fast and very coarse. I’m standing in a hallway, with a nurses’ station to my left. To my right, behind a steel gate, lie many occupied rooms of patients, fully spanning the entire length of the hallway. There’s a blind man on this side of the gate seated alongside his Seeing Eye dog, a German Shepherd.

   I feel as if I’ve experienced a time lapse! I can’t recall who, what, or where I’ve been between my flying dream and my cognizance in this hallway. Nobody sees me! When I shout, no one hears me! Am I having an out of body experience, or am I merely dead? Canine senses are far more acute than that of humans. I’ll yell into the dog’s ear:

   “Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!”

   He hears me! He turns his head, he raises his ears, he sniffs the air as he looks at me! I’ve been acknowledged by a dog!

   “Have you recently checked the status on Mr. Bower?” asked Nurse Stoker.

    “Yes, I’ve just looked in on him,” replied Nurse Young. “He appeared disoriented, completely oblivious to his surroundings. As I peeked through the observation window he disassociatedly stared in my direction. After walking towards me he tore the trim off the inside of his observation window. He then lifted the thin small frame up and over his head, dropping the frame around his circumference. Following this, he walked around in circles until lying down. Presently he appears to be sound asleep.” 

   “Good Lord,” remarked Nurse Stoker, “he’s way out there, isn’t he? Let’s just hope he didn’t incur any permanent brain damage. If all goes well, he may still recover.”

    I’m in a hospital! Or am I only dreaming I’m in a hospital? But if I’m having an out of body experience, then what room is my body in? In and out of focus, visually every sight intermittently flickers, back and forth between intense clarity and borderline obscurity. I also see numerous colors, alternating between vivid and bland. It’s all so surreal! The nurses’ faces are pale red and green. Why am I in a hospital? How long have I been here? At the opposite end of the hallway, two people begin inching their way toward me. Slipping in and out of focus, they continue heading in my direction. I believe one person’s pushing the other person in a wheelchair. It appears to be a man pushing a woman, yet I can’t quite make them out. The woman must be a patient. Her head is bandaged, her leg is in a cast. Everything is coming through in waves. I feel strong overwhelming emotions of empathy, concern, and allegiance. I must know these people!

   Gradually their images sharpen, slowly taking form. But still, I can’t quite make out their facial features. They’re getting closer, continuously forging ahead. I wonder, why can’t I hear the man’s footsteps? Their features begin solidifying, they approach in vivid clarity. Is that who I think it is? Yes…

    “Sarah!”

   She doesn’t hear me. I really hope I’m not dead. This man who’s with her pushing the wheelchair, I know him, but why do I see right through him? He’s transparent, yet Sarah is not. I now see that he does not push her, he only lurks behind her, stalking her! Upon acknowledging his true identity this once apathetic face now warmly greets me! What I had initially envisioned as bone-chilling hands, quite the contrary are nothing of the sort!

   “Death, I fear thee not!!!”