(Content Warning: Strong Violence, Murder, Psychological Phobias.)
October 1, 2020
My name is Doctor Jeremiah Isaack, and I’ve decided to commit my thoughts to words. It’s an exercise I often suggest for my patients because it helps prioritize problems, fears, and concerns. It also allows me to track their day-to-day symptoms, making it easier to recognize specific triggers that cause stress leading to a more fulfilling diagnosis. I think everyone should keep a journal, even if they are not currently seeing a psychiatrist like myself.
I’ve refrained from using this practice myself in the past simply because the demands on my time were so extensive. Helping my clients has always been an obsession. I pride myself on being the best and make no excuses for it.
Dear journal, I’ve always upheld a professional appearance and carried myself with class and dignity. For the past thirty-five years, I’ve dedicated my life to psychiatry. I have no family to speak of, and although I have amassed a vast fortune, I don’t have time to spend a dime!
Ruby City has been drowning in a sea of madness for as long as I can remember. I sometimes wonder if all the “sane” people have abandoned the ship. Despite my years of procrastination, I remained ever vigilant in my personal crusade for greatness.
Just this morning, my secretary, Amber, informed me that we received several one-star ratings from some of our new clients. I must admit that this surprising revelation left me feeling angry and bitter. It’s not my fault that this facility has become a drive-thru psychiatric practice. Clients are allowed fifteen minutes on a weekly basis, and I try my best to get the most out of each and every session. One-star review, indeed…
October 2, 2020
This morning I instructed Amber to give me the names of everyone who gave me a one-star rating. A bit harsh, I know, but I simply must make amends. After a few hours, I found myself staring at the list. Ethically speaking, I will not use their real names and refer to each person by first name only.
Sam, Alice, Ben, and Jessica have defiled my good name and reputation by giving me a one-star rating. This can not stand! I will not allow it!
Ahem… I don’t know what came over me. I must take a break before seeing my next patient.
October 3, 2020
Today I found myself sitting at my desk, staring at that list again. Beside each name was a contact number, and without hesitation, my brilliant mind formed a plan. I personally took the time and called each client to make amends. I informed them of a special one-off session, after hours, of course, to better help their needs.
Naturally, there was some hesitation, but after I informed them that this extra session would be free of charge, they all agreed to see me. I scheduled everyone on a different night to give them my undivided attention…
October 10, 2020
It’s been a while, dear journal, but after a busy week, I finally have some time to jot down some thoughts. Tonight is the first of four private sessions with the one-star defilers and to say I’m excited to begin is an understatement…
October 11, 2020
My God… what have I done?
Last night, I met with Sam in a private session. As a child, Sam was abused by his father and helplessly watched his mother take one beating after another. Now a middle-aged man, Sam had become his father and beats his wife and kids regularly. A classic story of the victim becoming the abuser. About one-third of victims fall prey to this devastating statistic.
Our session was going well up to that point. I asked Sam why he sought help for his sins, and he told me that his wife was going to leave him if he didn’t get some kind of aid. I thought this was a fascinating fact because he was only seeing me for his own selfish purposes. He didn’t care about the pain he so maliciously caused his own family. Classic abuser mentality!
I decided to delve deeper into Sam’s mind. I asked him how beating his wife and children made him feel. He immediately took offense to the question. I diffused the situation by telling him that this was simply a method to express himself without fear of prosecution or judgment.
He talked about how his rage took over and that he didn’t have control of his impulses. I listened intently and secretly wondered how that would feel. To give in to something so dark, so primal… it must be a freeing experience.
As Sam continued, I rose from my chair and slowly walked behind him, taking notes. He spoke of a memory from his childhood and remained motionless.
I felt annoyed and aggravated by Sam’s boring story and couldn’t help but notice the golden candlestick resting on my bookshelf. I interrupted Sam and asked how hitting his innocent family made them feel. He paused for a moment, and before he could answer, I whacked him with the blunt weapon.
Sam fell to the floor, head gushing red. He was dead; there was no doubt about that. I felt a surge of electricity, and my God… I was smiling. The power, the exhilaration, was amazing. I felt alive!
My joy was short-lived because the reality of what I had done began to sink in. I needed to dispose of Sam’s body and clean up the mess. I decided to dump his corpse in the Ruby City Canal on my way home, but before I did, I used Sam’s thumb to unlock his phone and changed his one-star rating to a perfect five-star review.
So, what have I done? Something amazing! I can’t wait for my next private session!
October 13, 2020
Alice was next in line for my special therapy session. She suffers from Entomophobia, which is a fear of bugs. We began our session by discussing her phobia. She took me back to a childhood memory where she was accidentally locked in her grandmother’s cellar full of cockroaches and spiders. She was trapped for hours as the tiny bugs scurried about her feet with their alien appendages.
I could see her hands shaking as her voice trembled. Again, I found myself smiling…
Wanting to move on, I asked Alice if she was willing to partake in a special exercise, one that might cure her. She pressed me for more information, and I simply told her that facing her fears was the only way to overcome her phobia. It took some convincing, but Alice reluctantly agreed.
Being one step ahead, I asked Alice to step into my office closet so that she could face her fears. The small space was dark and had a musky smell. Having second thoughts, Alice tried to run, but I grabbed her slender body and shoved her into the closet against her will. Once again, as I locked the door, a surge of power washed over me, and I loved it!
I listened with delicious glee as Alice whimpered. Now, the real fun could begin. I reached into my pocket and pulled out a remote. I told Alice it was time to face her fears and pressed the red button.
Above Alice was a sealed tank full of cockroaches and poisonous spiders that were now free to explore her body. I pranced around the office full of giddy delight. Hearing Alice scream and pounding the door filled me with electricity.
After a few minutes, the only thing I heard was the sputter of tiny little insect legs crawling within the closet. I unlocked the door and dragged Alice’s lifeless corpse out of the dark, confined space. I checked her pulse and felt the little buggers crawling beneath her skin.
Again, I unlocked her phone and gave myself a five-star rating. I dumped Alice’s body in the canal and went home to plan my next session.
That was so exciting. I guess Tom Petty was right… The waiting is the hardest part!
October 18, 2020
What can I say about Ben?
Ben was a relatively simple case. He had a fear of heights called, Acrophobia. Our session started out well, much like Alice’s did. I listened intently as Ben discussed how his father had died working as a construction worker. He fell from a giant skyscraper, and Ben was there to witness the whole thing. Since this tragic event, Ben’s fear of heights has plagued his entire adult life.
It was to be expected, but not to fear; I had the solution!
I told Ben the same thing I said to Alice. The only way to conquer his fear was by facing it. So, with much debate and persuasion, I managed to get Ben on the roof. I told him to stand on the ledge, which was one hundred feet high.
Ben looked me in the eyes and told me that he wasn’t ready and couldn’t do what I asked.
Why is it that every time I offer a solution, it gets spit back into my face?
I smiled politely to acknowledge his reluctance and noticed sweet relief wash over Ben’s face. We decided to go back inside. However, I couldn’t allow this transaction to go forward. I needed… no… I wanted to feel that powerful feeling again!
Before reaching the door to salvation, I grabbed Ben, drug him to the ledge, and threw him over. I giggled as he screamed to his death. The mess was enormously hard to clean off the pavement, and all I can say is, “thank God for bleach.” Being after hours, we were utterly alone with no witnesses to observe my little miracle.
After changing Ben’s rating to five stars, I dropped a bloody trash bag full of Ben’s broken body parts into the canal and called it a day.
October 31, 2020
Dear journal, it’s Halloween and my last private session of the month. I craved that powerful, dominant feeling, and I simply couldn’t wait to get started!
Jessica had a fear of water, otherwise known as Aquaphobia. I must admit, this particular session took me some time to plan…
Our meeting began like all the others, but I needed to get Jessica to face her fears. There wasn’t much I could do in the office as far as water was concerned other than drowning Jessica in the fish tank. That simply wouldn’t do because I adore my fish. The excitement of watching Jessica gasp her last breath might cause my little friends to die, and I simply can’t have that!
Ugh… After listening to Jessica’s story of woe-is-me at a campground where she almost drowned as a child, I managed to talk her into coming with me for a drive. It took some convincing, but Jessica was more willing than the others to do my bidding. The way she looked at me… I think she may have had a crush. I couldn’t hold that against her because it is true that I am a sexy old man! Alas… I didn’t have time for such nonsense. My work was far too important!
I drove through Ruby City until we reached the canal. The night air was cool, and the water looked like a dark serpent slithering against the molded cement. I told Jessica it was time to face her fears. She strolled over to me and placed a firm kiss on my lips which surprised me. I knew I was right! I wasn’t just a brilliant doctor, but a sexy beast as well!
However, I felt nothing from the kiss, but when I slammed her head on the hood of my car, I felt joy. That power was addictive, and I wanted… no… needed more. In a sense, I was a little overwhelmed by that feeling, but once a person gives in to that kind of temptation, killing is easy as breathing!
Jessica was out like a light, so I searched for her phone and found it neatly tucked away in her back pocket. With my trembling hands, I changed her rating to five stars.
I needed to act quickly before some passerby saw my exploits, so I grabbed Jessica’s blonde hair and yanked her to the water. A devilish smile erupted on my face as I plunged her head into the freezing depths. After six minutes, I let her body float away like a piece of trash, for that’s what she was to me!
I emerged from the canal and looked out towards Ruby City. The lights were like demons serenading my ascendance into the dark realm, calling me to a higher purpose.
I must be honest, dear journal, I like the new direction my life is taking. I can see now that my work is just beginning. From now on, I see nothing but five stars in my future!
My good work must continue, and it will! I can’t wait to get started…
Daniel R. Hayes