The Secret Organisation { part 4 }

Submitted into Contest #58 in response to: Write a story where the power goes out on a spaceship or submarine.... view prompt

136 comments

Adventure Thriller Mystery

As the days past by, the mission came up.


The mission is that Kane Richard was going to Atlantis with his companion Hannibal Lectre, but Hannibal was the best agent of Spectre.


They were going to Atlantis after a week.


Mr. Bond went to Amogh's cabin.


"There is a serious mission."


"What's the mission?"


"The mission is that Kane Richard the son of Luke Richard is going on an adventure to Atlantis."


"So what's the harm?"


"The harm is that Luke Richard organized an audition to select a companion, who will go with Kane. The companion which was selected is Hannibal Lectre, the best agent of Spectre. He is going there to take all the treasure of Atlantis."


"What is Spectre?"


"Spectre is an evil organization formed by Mr. Ernst Stavro Blofeld, Mr. Auric Goldfinger, Mr. Jaws, Mr. Alec Trevelyan, Mr. Francisco Scaramanga, Mr. Le Chiffre, and Mr. Dr. No."


"Oh, I see. So, let's start planning."


"Let's go to the research room."


The went to the research room.


"By the way Mr. Bond, how many days are left for the mission?"


"We have just a week for the mission."


" If I am not wrong, Atlantis should be in the Atlantic Ocean?"


"Yes, but we will follow what the Greek Philosopher Plato has mentioned, that Atlantis is located in the Strait of Gibraltar”


"We would need a submarine for following the submarine of Kane."


"Yes, I have told the designer to make a submarine which could be driven, it could fly and it could go inside the ocean."


"Can you add one more thing in the submarine?"


"What?"


"Can you add some weapons in it?"


"Yes, I will."


The days past by.


Two days were left for the mission.


They started collecting the instruments, which were required.


The submarine's design was ready. The mechanic started developing the submarine.


It was the day for the mission.


They went inside the submarine and touched the flying button. The wheels went inside and the wings came outside.


Their journey started.


"Mr. Bond, how we will follow the submarine of Kane?"


"Don't worry yesterday night I went to their house and stuck a tracking device on their submarine. So, where they will go I will get their location."


"That's good."


They tracked Kane's submarine.


They got a notification that Kane has gone underwater.


They also went underwater.


When they went into the water, there was a huge splash!


Some ice-bergs came in front of them. They used the torpedo to blat them.


Suddenly, a huge ice-berg came in front of them. They couldn't launch the torpedo. It hit the submarine and the power of the submarine was cut off.


They were worried, how would they complete the mission.


Mr. Bond went to check the batteries.


There he saw that the batteries were working but because of the hit, the wires had got some issues. They needed a huge amount of current to start the submarine again.


He went into the pilot cabin.


"Amogh we need a huge amount of current to restart the submarine."


They started thinking about how could they get the current.


At that time a huge electric eel was passing their submarine.


Mr. Bond saw it and got an idea.


"Amogh bring the extra wires and connect with the batteries then attach to a poll. The pole should be electric proof."


Amogh did the preparation.


"But why did you want all these instruments?"


"I need it to start the submarine."


"How?"


"Can you see the electric eel?"


"Yes, what will you do with it?"


"I will go outside and stand on the submarine. Then when the eel would be passing again that time I will point the pole towards the. So, when the eel will touch it the current will flow inside the wires and reach the batteries. Then the submarine will start."


"What if you are injured?"


"If I get injured, you go according to our plan."


"Ok."


Mr. Bond went outside.


The electric was coming towards them but Mr. Bond could not connect the pole with the eel.


He was thinking how would the eel come towards me.


He got an idea. He threw an ice-berg towards the eel. The eel was furious and came towards Mr. Bond.


When the eel came toward the pole, Mr. Bond connected the pole with the eel. The current came and the submarine started but unfortunately Mr. Bond also got current and he died.


Amogh remembered what Mr. Bond told him, that if I get injured please go according to the plan.


He saw the tracking device and followed the other submarine. 


He saw that they reached Atlantis. They were collecting the treasure.


Amogh wears his scuba gear and goes outside. He went inside the submarine of Kane and hide a place where no one cant's find him.


He stayed there till Hannibal doesn't show his real face.


Hannibal was going to trick Kane and go to his headquarters, that time Amogh jumped out from his place and shot him on his head.


"Who are you?"


"I will tell you, first take me to your home."


They reached Kane's home.


Luke had many questions in his mind.


He started asking one by one.


"Who are you?"

"Where is Hannibal?"


"Hannibal is dead."

"I am an agent of MI6."


"Who killed Hannibal?"


"I killed Hannibal because he was an agent of Spectre."


"What is Spectre?"


"Spectre is an evil organization formed by Mr. Ernst Stavro Blofeld, Mr. Auric Goldfinger, Mr. Jaws, Mr. Alec Trevelyan, Mr. Francisco Scaramanga, Mr. Le Chiffre, and Mr. Dr. No."


"Who are they?"


"They are the evil people who destroy everything."


"Thanks for saving my child."


"Don't say thanks, it's my work."


"What's your name?"


"My name is Amogh."


Amogh went to the headquarters of MI6.


There he told the full incident. He also told how Mr. Bond died.


The days past by. Amogh had killed Mr. Ernst Stavro Blofeld, Mr. Auric Goldfinger, Mr. Jaws, Mr. Alec Trevelyan, Mr. Francisco Scaramanga, Mr. Le Chiffre, and Mr. Dr. No. 


Then all the evil people had died and MI6 was closed.




















September 07, 2020 07:48

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136 comments

Amogh Kasat
08:56 Sep 07, 2020

Hannibal Lectre is a real person who is a cannibal

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Amogh Kasat
07:49 Sep 07, 2020

This is the last story of the sequel

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Hriday Saboo
06:21 Sep 20, 2020

Yeah we do read ur stories Answering your bio question

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Amogh Kasat
15:22 Sep 20, 2020

The things that I write in my bio I follow it

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Hriday Saboo
17:20 Sep 20, 2020

Already followed them

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Hriday Saboo
06:19 Sep 20, 2020

Would you mind reading my story The Zombies 🧟‍♂️ Just submitted it yesterday

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Amogh Kasat
15:22 Sep 20, 2020

Sure but afterwards

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Hriday Saboo
10:59 Sep 19, 2020

Hannibal lectre is just a fictional character Theres no one called hannibal. Ik cannibals are there but theres no one as hannibal

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Amogh Kasat
11:37 Sep 19, 2020

there is Hannibal Lectre but they don't show.

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Hriday Saboo
13:18 Sep 19, 2020

Ok ok upto u

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Keerththan 😀
05:26 Sep 08, 2020

This was great. Wonderful story, Amogh. Nice ending to the story. I am sad for Mr. Bonds death. Great write up. Anyways, keep writing. I found out a few mistakes. Edit it if you can. 1)I will go outside and stand on the submarine. Then when the eel would be passing again that time I will point the pole towards the. unfortunately Mr. Bond also got current and he died. You missed the word eel in between towards the and the dot. 2)hide a place where no one cant's find him. You have used the word hide here. It is present tense, change i...

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Amogh Kasat
05:32 Sep 08, 2020

thanks and I will work on it and the series isn’t ended

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Keerththan 😀
05:33 Sep 08, 2020

Welcome. I know that the series is not ended, but why don't you start a new series? Please read my new story. Thanks. I would be waiting for your comment and like.

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Amogh Kasat
05:40 Sep 08, 2020

I will think and sure

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Amogh Kasat
05:41 Sep 08, 2020

wait I have read all of your story

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Keerththan 😀
05:50 Sep 08, 2020

Yeah, now you have read it. Keep writing and thank you for reading.

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Keerththan 😀
05:47 Sep 08, 2020

No, you have not read my latest comedy story.

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Keerththan 😀
08:45 Sep 18, 2020

Let's see who wins tomorrow 🤗😜

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Amogh Kasat
08:47 Sep 18, 2020

Yes

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Avery G.
02:50 Sep 08, 2020

I really liked this! It was a good ending! Great job!

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Amogh Kasat
02:50 Sep 08, 2020

thanks

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Avery G.
02:52 Sep 08, 2020

You're welcome!

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Akshat .
09:04 Sep 07, 2020

It's a nice ending to the Bond quartet! I was sad that James died :( I noticed that you spelled "blast" wrong in paragraph 39, so you may want to edit that! :) And I also think that you shouldn't say that MI6 was closed just because Bond died because it's a large organization right? So, they should still carry on. Overall, it's a nice story! :D

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Amogh Kasat
15:47 Sep 07, 2020

thanks and I will work on it

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Akshat .
16:23 Sep 07, 2020

:)

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Amogh Kasat
01:58 Sep 08, 2020

:)

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Sapphire 🌼
15:49 Feb 01, 2021

First of all, I love this story's format! It made is neat and easy to read, instead of having it like, a bunch of words squished together on the screen! Secondly, the suspense and the adventurous vibe to it made it quite enjoyable! I was imagining how it would look like if it was a movie! The end though, it was capturing. Great Job!

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Amogh Kasat
04:38 Feb 02, 2021

thanks

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The Cold Ice
05:55 Oct 19, 2020

Hey Amogh Just a request you can upvote my comments I will also do the same.

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Amogh Kasat
15:06 Oct 19, 2020

Okay

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The Cold Ice
17:39 Oct 19, 2020

Thanks.

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The Cold Ice
05:35 Oct 13, 2020

Please read my story “The dragon warrior part 2?”

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Amogh Kasat
02:24 Oct 14, 2020

ok

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The Cold Ice
02:31 Oct 14, 2020

Thanks.

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Raquel Rodriguez
14:44 Oct 01, 2020

Nice story, Amogh! I love the ending. I noticed a few grammatical errors while I was reading though: 1.) 'As the days past by, the mission came up.' I think you meant, 'as the days passed by...' (It's simple but still important) 2.) 'The mission is that Kane Richard was going to Atlantis with his companion Hannibal Lectre, but Hannibal was the best agent of Spectre.' This sounds like you're talking to the audience, which isn't really something people do in stories. Also, I thought the story was in past-tense? 'The mission ...

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Amogh Kasat
03:54 Oct 02, 2020

Thanks and I will work on it

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Raquel Rodriguez
11:43 Oct 02, 2020

Do you mind checking out my new submission?

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Amogh Kasat
11:54 Oct 02, 2020

Sure but afterwards

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Raquel Rodriguez
11:57 Oct 02, 2020

Okay, thanks! :)

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Hriday Saboo
07:38 Sep 19, 2020

No new stories huh 🤔?

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Amogh Kasat
08:38 Sep 19, 2020

yes, you have also not submitted any new story

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Hriday Saboo
08:57 Sep 19, 2020

Yeah planning to submit this week. Are you getting downvoted ?

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Amogh Kasat
11:36 Sep 19, 2020

I m getting downvoted

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Anshika Goyal
19:27 Sep 11, 2020

I loved your story, Amogh!! Congrats on the concept. The story is well-written and oh- those dialogue tags make me feel like an observer. I hope I can write like You T_T Also, I must appreciate that you wrote it choosing submarine. Most of the people wrote about spaceship. This story stands out! I am a newbie here, and I would love it if you check out my story-'Hiraoka Aika' ;)

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Amogh Kasat
04:03 Sep 12, 2020

thanks and I will read your story after some time

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B. W.
14:00 Sep 11, 2020

You've only made about 5 stories so far which is fine but whenever you have the time you should make some more ^^ this story was really good and you did a great job with it and i don't think there was anything wrong about it. so guess what? this story gets a 10/10 :)

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Amogh Kasat
15:13 Sep 11, 2020

Yes I will write more

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Tejas Chandna
18:36 Sep 09, 2020

Finally The end! Man what a series! I hope to write like you! Can you read my story "Freedom to fire the flies"?

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Amogh Kasat
01:43 Sep 10, 2020

thanks but the series isn't ended. I will read

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The Cold Ice
05:34 Sep 09, 2020

Good story.Great job keep it up. Would you mind to read my story “The dragon warrior part 2?”

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Amogh Kasat
06:03 Sep 09, 2020

yes

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Niveeidha Palani
22:27 Sep 08, 2020

HI Amogh, the last line, was...well, unexpected? Why should they choose to close down MI6 because the evil people had died? There will still be evil people in this world, and it doesn't necessarily need to close because the best agent died right? Anyway, it's still your story and it's your choice! Great job on this!

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Amogh Kasat
01:48 Sep 09, 2020

It's not really closed, If I get a prompt I can tell that a boy lived he made and organization known as MI6

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Niveeidha Palani
10:15 Sep 09, 2020

Oh, oops, my mistake :)

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Amogh Kasat
13:41 Sep 09, 2020

It's ok

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Jane Andrews
21:12 Sep 08, 2020

I can tell you've really enjoyed writing this, Amogh. In places, you stretch our credibility a little too much eg being told that plans have been drawn up for a submarine and a day later there it is; or having James Bond throwan iceberg at a villain. (That's like throwing a mountain at someone, and James Bond is a secret agent, not a superhero!) To be honest, I'd embrace these less than convincing aspects and aim for a slightly more surreal feel - yes, you're referencing characters such as James Bond, but you could treat this almost like a...

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Amogh Kasat
01:46 Sep 09, 2020

thanks and I will work on it

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Awesome! It was sad that James ended but I did think that this was a great ending to the ¨Series¨. (And yes, I did read all of them)

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Amogh Kasat
03:49 Sep 08, 2020

series is not ended

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Amogh Kasat
03:50 Sep 08, 2020

if I get a prompt I can write it ahead

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