The Attic's Secret

Submitted into Contest #250 in response to: Write a story in which someone is afraid of being overheard.... view prompt

24 comments

Fiction Thriller

Amidst the pall of war, creaking atop the old timbers of an attic floor lay Jakob Kaufmann, a child wrought with a silence that screamed louder than the tumult below. Eight years young, his small frame was swallowed by shadows that flickered eerily with each passing car headlight through the attic vent. The noise below—a racket of high spirits, laughter mingling with the clink of glasses—felt alien to him now.

Jakob's world had shrunk since his escape to this concealed attic room. He felt estranged not only from his parents but also from the boy he used to be.

"Stay silent, whatever happens,” his mother’s last whisper echoed in his heart, a tight throb that kept time with his shallow breaths. Below, the revelry ground on, oblivious to the fragile soul just rafters away.

Jakob rubbed the locket he wore always—a simple piece, golden and gleaming against his chest it bore his initials, a birthday gift from better days. Its chill was a cold comfort as the voices swelled, laughter spiking like a cruel tide against his quietude.

As the Nazi officer, Hans Müller, prepared his residence for the evening’s entertainments, his presence filtered up through the ceiling boards, carried by the surety and command of one used to being both feared and obeyed. The clattering of his booted steps was intermittent thunder. Jakob imagined Müller below: a tall, imposing figure casting shadows that danced with those flickering over his hidden perch.

Müller’s charm was the dangerous kind, draped in uniform and authority, with a smile that masked the calculated coldness of his aims. This evening wasn’t merely for leisure—it was another move in the deadly game of loyalty and betrayal Müller orchestrated with delight. The stage was his home, the actors his guests, unwitting or unwilling in their roles in the night’s forthcoming drama.

Jakob, eyes squeezed shut, tried blocking out the noise, the fear, the imagined and real shadows, by conjuring up the safer, sun-washed hues of days spent with his parents before war had redrawn their world. His mother’s laughter, his father’s steady gaze—memories now as distant as the stars veiled by the town’s wartime blackout. But each burst of laughter below jabbed at these recollections, each toast an elegy to the peace past.

As the assembled crowd warmed with wine and camaraderie, the attic’s chill deepened, seeping into Jakob’s bones. The isolation was complete, a frozen sea between the warmth of human festivities and the ice of hiding. But in hiding, there was hope, the slender thread his parents had spun into this tapestry of concealment, with belief and desperation coloring its strands.

The night grew darker, and with it, the sounds of celebration below escalated into a boisterous symphony of noise, the occasional strains of a gramophone adding to the sonic tapestry. Every footstep, every burst of laughter was a potential catastrophe to Jakob, each note a potential herald of his doom. His heart competed with the rhythm of the music, a frenetic drum against the calm he so desperately sought.

In his secluded perch, Jakob shuffled softly across the wooden floor, the faint creak of the boards beneath his feet sounding monstrous in his ears. The dusty air filled his lungs, each breath a stinging reminder of his precarious sanctuary. He moved with deliberate care, reaching out to adjust a small stack of forgotten books that leaned precariously near the edge of an old crate. Their thud, should they fall, might betray his presence.

Below, Hans Müller raised his voice, the genial mask of the host slipping slightly as his tone sharpened, cutting through the din. “Friends, tonight, we not only celebrate our victories but reassert our commitment to the purification of our society. Our resolve must be unbreakable.”

His words, spoken with the ease of absolute conviction, chilled Jakob more than the draft seeping through the attic slats. Müller was a spider at the center of a web of fear, each thread vibrating with the tremors of his dark intentions.

Meanwhile, unknown to Jakob, amidst the crowd, his parents, Sarah and David, exchanged a loaded glance. They, too, felt the mask of normalcy they wore growing heavier with each of Müller’s words. Their presence at this party wasn’t voluntary; they were part of a cruel game, chess pieces maneuvered by Müller’s sadistic hands. Sarah’s hand reached for David’s under the table, a lifeline in their shared terror.

“We must remain vigilant,” Müller continued, his gaze sweeping over his guests like a lighthouse beam, searching, always searching. “There are those who still think they can deceive us, hide in plain sight. But they forget—they are as shadows to us, and we will find them.”

David felt Sarah’s grip tighten. They knew their son was overhead, so close yet unreachable, shielded only by silence and shadows. The implications of Müller’s words were clear, and the threat they posed was immediate and personal.

Back in the attic, Jakob, unaware of his parents’ presence, drew his knees closer to his chest, making himself as small as possible. His mind raced, every scenario he conjured darker than the last. The noise below wasn’t just a party; it was a hunt, cloaked in revelry.

As the evening wore on, the laughter and music became punctuated by bouts of serious discussion, plans wrapped in harsh, hushed tones. The atmosphere shifted, the earlier mirth descending into something far more sinister as Müller steered his guests toward darker diversions.

“We have a special game tonight,” Müller announced, his voice threaded with a dangerous excitement. “A test of loyalty and cunning.”

Sarah and David froze, fear seeping through their veins like ice water. Each knew without words that this ‘game’ could very well be the end. The room’s air grew thick, suffocating, as if Müller’s announcement had sucked the oxygen from the space.

In the attic, Jakob heard the change in timbre, the shift from celebration to something else. He hugged the locket tighter, a talisman against the growing dread. His thoughts flickered to his parents, wherever they were, hoping they were safe, hidden from the evil that now seemed to seep through the floorboards.

Little did he know how close they truly were, and how much hung in the balance as Müller’s ‘game’ began to unfold below.

The party’s atmosphere, once buoyed by the levity of camaraderie and wine, now curved under Hans Müller’s sinister intent. “We shall bring forth the hidden among us,” he declared, his voice rising in pitch and fervor, casting a heavy pall over his guests. The purported ‘game’ was his twisted invention, designed to instill fear and loyalty but rooted in the most dangerous stakes imaginable—life or deception.

Sarah’s heart raced as she and David exchanged a mute, harrowing understanding. The risk of betrayal nibbled at the fringes of their facade. Each participant at Müller’s gatherings was a potential Judas; each glance or gesture might conceal a dagger of suspicion or accusation. Her mind spun, bathed in the dual matte of fear for her son hidden above and the torment of maintaining her composure under the scrutinizing eyes of their host.

Above them, Jakob sensed the sinister turn of events even through the barrier of the ceiling. Each word Müller spoke seemed to echo up into his cramped confines, stitching him tighter into a fabric of chill dread. He pulled an old cloth around his shoulders, trying to blend further into the darkness, as if he could disappear altogether from the peril that now hunted him more openly.

Müller’s voice dropped a notch, silk over steel. “Members of our pure community, it has come to my knowledge—a chance of subversive shadows among us. Tonight, we unmask them. A reward awaits the vigilant.”

The guests stiffened, a tableau of frozen smiles and narrowed eyes. The heated air of the room became further thickened by suspicion, each person suddenly isolated in their caution. The clinking of glasses halted; the laughter wilted into silence. Each sound seemed to await Müller’s next direction, hanging on his every word as if it were a lifeline—or a noose.

In the attic, the diminutive rumble of voices prickled at Jakob’s nerve ends. He swallowed his panic, wishing he could vanish into the minute cracks of the wooden floor or seep into the shadows that cloaked him. Staying absolutely silent was no longer just a precaution—it was his lifeline.

Downstairs, Müller continued, crafted charm peeling off to reveal the cold schemer beneath. “Let’s enlighten our night with truth. Bring forth the Carlsons,” he commanded, his eyes sparking with cruel anticipation.

A middle-aged couple, pale and trembling, was ushered forward. The room’s atmosphere tensed, a collective breath held. Jakob’s parents, hidden in plain sight among the guests, felt an icy terror clutch their hearts. These games were not new—their nature grotesque, outcomes often fatal. Müller relished the power, feeding off the fear and tension his game incited.

As the accusations began, a dismal theatre unfolded. Denials met with scoffs, evidence paraded with ruthless efficiency by Müller, his every move that of a maestro orchestrating a symphony of dread. The Carlsons cried, pleaded, the woman’s knees buckling under the strain. The party, a jury shrouded in shadows, watched on, some with glee, others with horror barely masked.

Above, every plea stroked Jakob’s spine with ice. The words, though muffled, carried a weight that pressed him smaller into his hideaway. He wrapped the cloth tighter around himself, a futile shield against the creeping cold of fear.

With a crescendo of malevolent grace, Müller presented his final piece of ‘evidence’—a hidden artifact of Jewish origin found in the Carlsons’ possession. The verdict was swift, the consequences dire.

Sarah, witnessing the cruel spectacle, felt a surge of desperation. The realization of what could happen if Jakob were discovered beat at her with renewed ferocity. As Müller’s gaze swept across the room, momentarily catching hers, a shiver darted down her spine.

The stakes were clear: their son was under the same roof, hidden just a whisper away from the monster who rejoiced in their fear.

As Müller reveled in the outcome of his dreadful game, the party began to fragment, conversational clusters thick with whispers and wary glances. David and Sarah, bound by fear and protective instincts, felt both exposed and invisible amidst the chaos. They clung to their roles—unwilling actors on Müller’s macabre stage—yet hope waned with each passing moment, each creak of the old house’s bones.

Upstairs, the haunting finality of the Carlsons’ fate seared into Jakob’s consciousness. The clamor below sent ripples of terror through the dark, silent attic. His sanctuary, a fragile bubble in the tempest, threatened to burst with every shout, every heavy footfall that vibrated through the ceiling. Jakob tucked himself further into the corner, the shadows swallowing him as he prayed silently for the nightmare to end.

Meanwhile, Müller, ever the puppet master, sensed the unrest his ‘entertainment’ had sown. He stood, glass in hand, his voice slicing through the tension. “A toast,” he declared, his gaze sweeping the holdouts of fear and fascination. “To purity, to loyalty, to the strength of our cause!”

The guests, compelled by the gravity of their situation, raised their glasses in a show of compliance. The clink of glass echoed mockingly in Sarah’s ears, a grim reminder of their perilous predicacy. She gripped David’s hand under the table, her thoughts racing for a plan, any plan, that could extricate them from this woven web of deception and danger.

Müller’s eyes, sharp as talons, scanned the room. “We continue our game,” he announced, his voice booming with a mix of threat and glee. “By night’s end, we shall see who else among us deserves the light of truth.”

His words felt like a noose tightening around the room’s collective neck. Guests shifted uncomfortably; some avoided eye contact. The game was far from over, and no one was safe.

In the attic, stale air pressed down on Jakob as the weight of his circumstances became unbearable. He clutched the locket, the cold metal a reminder of a warmth that seemed worlds away now. His heart ached for his parents, for safety, for a breath of wind that spoke of open skies and fields, not the stifling, dust-choked whispers of the attic.

David, feeling Sarah’s despair as closely as his own, leaned close, his voice a husky whisper amid the crowd’s nervous murmur. “We need to end this, find a way to get him out before—”

But before he could finish, a sudden sharp creek from the ceiling cut through the low conversations, a sound out of sync with the evening’s orchestration. Instantly, every eye flicked upward, including Müller’s. The abrupt silence was more terrifying than any accusation.

Müller’s lips twisted into a sinister smile. “It seems,” he said, his voice eerily calm, yet loud enough to reach the rafters, “our evening’s entertainment has yet to disclose all its participants.”

Sarah’s heart plummeted. Eyes wide in terror, she and David sat frozen, the potential implications of that sound – the reality that their son might have just sealed his fate – cascading through them like ice water.

Quickly, Müller gestured to two of his officers. “Inspect the attic,” he commanded, his words a cold hand squeezing the room’s atmosphere. As the officers moved to obey, the scrape of their boots on the wooden floor sounded a death knoll.

In the attic, Jakob’s breath hitched. The thin veil of safety shredded with the approaching threat. As the door to his hideaway creaked open, revealing the stark light of a lantern sweeping across the dim corners, time slowed. The beam of light approached, inexorable as fate.

David’s and Sarah’s hearts raced in unison, pulsating with dread as the lantern’s glow invaded the periphery of their vision. Each step the officers took was a hammer strike against the fragile glass of their composed exteriors. They exchanged a glance, a myriad of emotions passing silently between them—fear, regret, determination. In that look was an unspoken vow: to protect Jakob, no matter the outcome.

In the attic, Jakob recoiled into the shadows as the light bled across the floorboards, filling his hideout with stark, unforgiving light. The officers’ voices were dull hums beneath the roaring in his ears. His small body pressed against the rough wood, heart pounding like a drum in the quiet aftermath of their entrance.

“Look around, make sure we leave no corner unchecked,” one officer grumbled, his voice laced with irritation. They were but pawns in Müller’s cruel diversion, indifferent to the despair they wrought.

As the beam of the lantern swept closer, Jakob squeezed his eyes shut, clutching the locket until the edges bit into his palm. He could hear his own quick, shallow breaths, loud in the silence enveloping him. The fear was palpable, a thick cloak suffocating all reason, all hope.

Below, Sarah felt a surge of protective fury as she watched the officers disappear from the room, the guests murmuring in hushed, expectant tones. This charade, this monstrous game, was her family’s reality, a nightmare from which there seemed no waking. Beside her, David’s face was set, his eyes hard with resolve. They had to act.

Müller’s voice cut through the tension. “Now, let us see what other secrets this night will reveal,” he said, a sinister smile playing across his lips.

But in a breath, in the beat of a heart, everything changed.

Sarah stood abruptly, her chair scraping back loudly against the floor. All eyes, including Müller’s, snapped toward her. The room fell eerily silent, the only sound the slight tremor in Sarah’s voice as she began to speak.

“We cannot do this anymore,” she declared, her voice gaining strength. “This game you play, Hans, it risks lives—innocent lives.”

Müller’s eyebrows raised, amusement mingling with surprise. “And you would know about innocence, Frau Kaufmann?” His words dripped venom, the room tightening like a noose around them.

Silence crackled through the air, each second stretching interminably. David rose to join his wife, his presence a solid, comforting force. “We know our son is here,” he said clearly, the truth laid bare in a gambit for mercy, or perhaps martyrdom. “Please, let him be.”

Up in the attic, as the officers reached toward the darkened nook where Jakob trembled, the door suddenly banged open below them, Müller’s voice roaring up the stairs, commanding a halt. The officers paused, confusion etched on their faces as they listened to their orders.

Müller, down in the party room, examined Sarah and David, his expression unreadable. Then, slowly, a clapping sound filled the room, Müller’s hands coming together in slow, mocking applause. “Bravo,” he sneered. “Finally, some true courage surfaces. Bring the boy down.”

Heart sinking, Sarah and David braced themselves as the officers descended the attic stairs, Jakob held tightly between them. His parents’ faces were the first he saw as he emerged, a mixture of relief and despair greeting him in their expressions.

The room held its breath as Jakob was brought forth. Müller stepped forward, an ominous shadow falling across the young boy. “There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. The truth laid bare.”

Yet as Müller prepared to deliver their fate, an unexpected interruption shattered the tense atmosphere. A higher-ranking officer burst into the room, urgent news upon his lips concerning an imminent threat to Müller himself—an internal investigation into his conduct and misuse of power.

Müller, his attention snapped away, was momentarily distracted, a flicker of fear crossing his usually composed features. In that momentary lapse, a window—brief but critical—opened.

“Run, Jakob!” David hissed, and without a second thought, Jakob bolted for the door, his parents a heartbeat behind him. The guests erupted into chaos, some standing in shock, others choosing this moment to question Müller’s authority.

As the Kaufmanns disappeared into the night, the future uncertain but their family bond unbroken, Müller’s game ended—not with a victory, but with a stunning, unexpected checkmate.

May 12, 2024 18:48

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24 comments

Cedar Barkwood
03:36 Jun 02, 2024

“Müller’s game ended—not with a victory, but with a stunning, unexpected checkmate.” a perfect last line. You wrapped up such a wonderful suspenseful story with incredible grace. Amazing job!

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Jim LaFleur
10:42 Jun 02, 2024

I always appreciate your feedback. Thanks again, Cedar!

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00:38 May 24, 2024

What a gripping story!!! So vivid. So well done. Great to contrast the attic with the party as you did. You write a number to each prompt and it's hard to read them all. Glad I picked this one. I'm so relieved they ran away. My heart is still beating wildly.

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Jim LaFleur
10:10 May 24, 2024

Thank you so much for your kind words! It means a lot to me that you chose my submission to read. Your feedback is always greatly appreciated!

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David Richards
22:44 May 23, 2024

Amazing! You really brought on the suspense the family was feeling. Well done.

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Jim LaFleur
10:07 May 24, 2024

Thanks, David!

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Milly Orie
18:23 May 21, 2024

The imagery in this story was so impressive! ‘Every plea stroked Jakob’s spine with ice’-I liked that phrase, very chilling.

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Jim LaFleur
09:12 May 22, 2024

Thanks so much for the kind words!

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Helen A Smith
09:20 May 20, 2024

I like the way you portrayed the chill of the attic with the scene of false merriment below. Tense piece with a strong delivery which did not let up till the end.

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Jim LaFleur
09:53 May 20, 2024

Thanks, Helen!

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Darvico Ulmeli
20:04 May 18, 2024

Very intensive. Hooked me from the start. I was cheering for Jacob whole the time.

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Jim LaFleur
20:45 May 18, 2024

Thanks, Darvico!

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Kim Olson
04:47 May 18, 2024

Excellent, riveting story!

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Jim LaFleur
09:50 May 18, 2024

Thank you, Kim!

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Laurie Spellman
21:19 May 17, 2024

Great work. I loved the build-up of tension. Bravo🌟

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Jim LaFleur
09:44 May 18, 2024

Thank you, Laurie!

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McKade Kerr
02:38 May 17, 2024

Wow! I’m so impressed! It was a big shift in tone and style from your usual stories, but you did it so well! I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. I’m glad Jakob and his parents had a chance to escape at the end, I was getting pretty nervous for them, haha.

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Jim LaFleur
09:37 May 17, 2024

Thanks for the kind words! Now and then I get in a serious mood and bring out this style!

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Martin Ross
14:29 May 15, 2024

Powerful, powerfully told, and very sadly, still relevant to our times and the monsters who never learned from history. Well-done — I felt every minute of it, which is great writing.

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Jim LaFleur
16:16 May 15, 2024

Thank you, Martin, for your kind words!

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Trudy Jas
21:01 May 14, 2024

Switching back and forth, building the tension. Masterful.

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Jim LaFleur
11:21 May 15, 2024

Thanks, Trudy!

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Alexis Araneta
17:45 May 13, 2024

Jim ! Such stunning stuff ! You brought some historical fiction out of that prompt ! Wow ! Impeccable use of description, lovely flow. Amazing job !

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Jim LaFleur
19:12 May 13, 2024

Thank you so much for the kind words! I felt like writing something a little more serious this time. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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