488 comments

Drama Fiction Teens & Young Adult

The three of us walked down the long stretched out hall-way as I tried to prepare myself for the inevitable to come. It started almost immediately once those idiots saw her barely enter the classroom.


"Vivian you have such a beautiful name!" they would excitedly say and then it would always be followed by, "Can we please be friends? You are so popular."


Her inevitable responses would always end up being, "Aw You have a beautiful name as well" which would quickly be followed up by "Of course we can I'd love that."


I tried my best to make myself not hear any of this during the classes but again, all of this was just inevitable, and no matter what I was able to hear it. The popular girl was of course going to have some fangirls there.


"Vivian, why do you hang out with that girl? nothing is special about her." one of her idiotic fangirls had asked her after the first class. I don't even understand why this girl has fangirls, she's just someone.


I could hear her begin to speak but I didn't want to stick around and see what she was going to tell the girl. Besides, I think I have a feeling about what she was already going to say.


"Oh, I just feel so bad for her and so I'm letting her hang out with me until she finds actual friends. We weren't friends to begin with, I just feel bad."


Though I hadn't been looking where I was going when I walked out into the cafeteria and then proceeded to bump into someone. "Oh gosh, Ivy are you alright?"


Oh great. "Hello, Ash...how's your life been being together with the popular girl?"


Yep, that's right, every popular girl always needs to have a boyfriend with them. Though all of Vivian's stupid fangirls and everyone else didn't seem to really care about Ash, it was just about her.


I again didn't want to stay that long in the cafeteria to see what he would say and I speed-walked out of there. There were still five classes to go to, but I didn't go to them. Not like anyone would notice that I'm missing.


Finally, the bell soon rang, it felt like absolute music in my ears every day. Though it was always a bit loud and I felt almost deaf for a while, though that was good as well, I wouldn't have to hear Vivian's stupid fans.


I ran towards the exit and quickly left Vivian high, and yes that was the actual name of the school. Though it seemed like it was a big present for her and not just the name, this was probably one of the reasons she decided to go here.


It's almost like I could hear her obnoxious voice telling her fan-girls, "Isn't it great everyone? My name was beautiful enough to be the name of something great."


I've wished for a long time that maybe, just maybe one day maybe Zeus could just come down here and get rid of Vivian. He's a greek god and it's Zeus, he could do anything he wants.


Though that was likely to never happen at any point in time, though I wish it would. This isn't a fantasy though, this is just reality.


"Hey, Ivy wait up!"


If it had been Vivian or one of those other people that I've mentioned I would have just kept going, Though I realized it was Ash. He wasn't that bad compared to the others so I decided to stop, at least for him.


"What do you want, Ash? don't you have to be with your girl-friend right about now?"


He seemed to look around the area we were in before lightly chuckling and then speaking, "We have nothing else to really do and Vivian has an old tree-house, would you want to come with us?"


Hm, a treehouse? why would she ever want a tree-house? She could be going on a cruise or something right about now if she wanted to, but she decides to be at a tree-house? Wait...I got a perfect idea.


I must have been in my thoughts for quite a while because Ash was snapping his fingers to get my attention and he seemed a bit impatient. I then simply nodded with a smirk on my face as I walked back to my place.


"Uh...bye! see ya later I guess."


I had a while before I had to go and see the two at her place and the tree-house, so I was left at my house with only my thoughts. They would keep me company, I hope. Wait, do I really wanna try and do this?


I didn't know what to do for the past few hours and the question kept coming up in my mind every so often. The clock on the wall showed me that it was time for me to go.


The clock continued to tick from behind me as I then opened the door and headed for her place, the answer to the question I had been wondering I now knew. Yes. Yes, I will.


"Ivy, You made it!" Two voices which must have been Vivian and Ash say in unison from the backyard. I don't know how they could have seen me since I hadn't even seen them, there were trees covering the whole Tree-house.


While I carefully began to climb up the unsteady ladder I could already imagine in full visuals of what was to come. Vivian was loudly talking on her phone now in which I heard her say, "No they haven't said anything, I'm not sure if ill be in the movie."


"Wait...What?!"


Snap!


In anger, just as I started reaching the top of the tree-house, I end up managing to break off a piece of the old rusted ladder. I swear it would have turned into a million pieces if it hadn't landed in the soft grass, where it only lost a few more pieces.


"You're going to be in a movie?!"


Ash carefully walked over to me as he began to try and lead me to something as he spoke, "She's not in the movie yet, she auditioned and doesn't know. It's not even that big of one either, you shouldn't worry."


He sat me down on a small blue bean-bag that looked like the ocean in a way, though none of us said anything, we just stared. That wasted about five or ten minutes while we tried to think of what to say.


Eventually, Ash awkwardly coughed to get our attention as he then suggested, "Why don't I go and get us some drinks or something? Vivian's mother has some in the kitchen."


"Alright Ashy be back soon!"


I watch him carefully go down the ladder and really slowly as well, almost like a turtle or a sloth in a way. Once he finally got down and back into the kitchen, It was time for me to put my plan into action.


Though it was still a bit awkward as the two of us just stared at each other until I then asked her, "Wait, Vivian, do you maybe see that?" I pointed to the edge of the tree-house.


"Huh?"


"Go check it out!"


Vivian, a bit confused, stared at me until she got off of her stool and got near the edge while trying to find the thing that I mentioned. I quickly got up behind her with a large smirk on my face. This should be enough to get rid of her...


"You know, Vivian...maybe you shouldn't be standing that close to the edge, you could maybe fall" I laugh while I don't have time to see how she reacts, I shove her off the tree-house.


I look down to watch and see what happens, I can see her terrified and confused face look back at me, not knowing what's going on. When she was going to hit the ground though, I looked away not wanting to see it, though I could hear it.

November 11, 2020 04:19

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488 comments

✨Abby ✨
02:41 Dec 11, 2020

Ahhh I already read your story you posted after this, but I now see this is the first part.. I have mixed feelings about the ending. I have empathy for Vivian, I don’t think She deserved it, but at the same time... she did lol I don’t know 😂.

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B. W.
02:49 Dec 11, 2020

You sort of think she deserves it, whats a reason for that? like your own reason to believing why and all that.

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✨Abby ✨
02:54 Dec 11, 2020

I think she sorta deserves it in a lil teeny way cuz of what she says about (omg I forgot her name 🤦‍♀️) the main character, but she probably didn’t quite deserve it because it was probably her parents fault for raising her a spoiled brat... in the, you know, NICEST way possible.

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B. W.
03:46 Dec 11, 2020

The popular girl characters name is Vivian unless your talking about the main character then her name is Ivy.

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✨Abby ✨
03:49 Dec 11, 2020

Yea I meant Vivian knda deserves it cuz of what she said to Ivy.

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B. W.
03:53 Dec 11, 2020

what do ya mean? what did she say to Ivy?

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Keerththan 😀
08:37 Nov 28, 2020

Amazing story to the prompt! The ending was funny in a way I could imagine. The feelings were conveyed wonderfully. I loved the names too. Wonderful work. You have a insy pinsy tiny problem in punctuation. I don't think you can edit so I don't want to take out the mistakes. Anyways, great job and a wonderful story :)

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B. W.
19:11 Nov 28, 2020

Thanks ^^ For my stories ive always tried to use unique or at least strange names in them

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Ashlyn Anderson
22:59 Nov 17, 2020

Well, I'm trying to get a scholarship to become a well known writer in hopes of changing the world and I would like some tips.

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B. W.
23:07 Nov 17, 2020

what kind of tips though? like how to start something?

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Ashlyn Anderson
02:59 Nov 18, 2020

To keep ideas rolling and how self improve. Stuff like that. Why do you write? Like what is your dream- your goals?

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B. W.
03:03 Nov 18, 2020

i dunno

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Good Job! Keep writing!

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B. W.
02:42 Nov 17, 2020

thanks ^^ did ya maybe have a favorite part or anything like that?

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I liked the ending!

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Also can you read my story and give some feedback -Thanks in advance

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B. W.
03:22 Nov 17, 2020

sure i dont see why not

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B. W.
04:40 Nov 17, 2020

Im a bit busy and doing some other stuff though, so ill check it out when I can

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Amaya .
00:32 Nov 17, 2020

hey B i just realized in ur bio u have my old username

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B. W.
00:33 Nov 17, 2020

why did ya ever change it?

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Amaya .
00:34 Nov 17, 2020

oh just for fun

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B. W.
00:35 Nov 17, 2020

I just fixed it ^^

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. .
21:42 Nov 15, 2020

I love the name Vivian it reminds me of valentines day Idk why. I look down to watch and see what happens, I can see her terrified and confused face look back at me, not knowing what's going on. When she was going to hit the ground though, I looked away not wanting to see it, though I could hear it. The way this was written was incredibly filled with sooo much talent! The vocab was amazing -Chrissy

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B. W.
21:44 Nov 15, 2020

I liked it a lot as well and I was trying to find some kind of unique name for this story and my other ones, that's why I used it ^^ though thanks and I'm really glad that you liked the story, did ya have a favorite part or was it the thing you said?

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. .
21:49 Nov 15, 2020

My favourite part would probably be when the girls were 'fangirling' Vivian it reminds me of a childhood book I read

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B. W.
22:30 Nov 15, 2020

is that all?

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. .
07:07 Nov 16, 2020

Maybe the end too

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B. W.
07:14 Nov 16, 2020

would you want to see another part or anything like that?

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Felicity Anne
17:23 Nov 13, 2020

We can use this as a new comment thread because our other one is getting a little long. ;)

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B. W.
17:55 Nov 13, 2020

well, ya know how i told ya about all my novels?

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Felicity Anne
19:12 Nov 13, 2020

Yes, I do! I may have to be reminded of your plot, though!

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B. W.
19:19 Nov 13, 2020

well its a newer im trying to do, ya know 'saving a friend' and 'otherworldly repairs' right?

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Felicity Anne
19:21 Nov 13, 2020

Yes!

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B. W.
19:47 Nov 13, 2020

those are in the same universe and all that, so that's why it'll be a novel together with all of the characters

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. .
15:45 Nov 12, 2020

This is an amazing story, but I think what you need to do is use conjunctions and punctuation correctly. It'll make it less awkward reading through. I really liked the storyline, because it seems as if she doesn't really have a reason to hate Vivian as Vivian didn't do anything to her, but she's still angry. Great characterization, and I loved it.

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B. W.
17:29 Nov 12, 2020

she does have a few reasons for killing Vivian though besides being a bit jealous that she was popular

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. .
19:21 Nov 12, 2020

Well then include those. That's the only logical thing to do rather than withhold them.

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B. W.
19:34 Nov 12, 2020

wait, did you change your name?

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. .
19:35 Nov 12, 2020

Yes, I did! Can you figure out the puzzle

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B. W.
19:36 Nov 12, 2020

something about pulling a rabbit out of a hat?

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. .
15:49 Nov 12, 2020

I really don't like Ivy as a person though, as she didn't really have a reason for killing Vivian other than jealousy.

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Sia S
06:21 Nov 11, 2020

Ooohhhhh, that ending!!! Superb! No grammar mistakes, the story was flowing, and the end was cool!!

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B. W.
06:22 Nov 11, 2020

thanks, im glad ya liked it ^^ what did ya think about Ivy?

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Sia S
06:23 Nov 11, 2020

Her character was also well formed

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B. W.
06:24 Nov 11, 2020

what do ya think about what she did at the ending? do ya think Vivian maybe deserved that or something?

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Sia S
06:25 Nov 11, 2020

Yeah, I guess she deserved it

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B. W.
06:29 Nov 11, 2020

do ya think there should be another part to this or something?

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Orenda .
05:28 Nov 11, 2020

when i started reading this, i thought it'd be the typical highschool drama, but the ending took me off guard. Pretty good. "I look down to watch and see what happens, I can see her terrified and confused face look back at me, not knowing what's going on." -describe Vivian's pain to make it more interesting. You've just said terrifying and confused. If she's hurt, describe her wounds, how she reacts to the situation. Her hands are visibly trembling and she's clasping onto her injured body part or whatever.

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B. W.
05:41 Nov 11, 2020

I wanted to end it on a cliff-hanger type ending and a surprising one, I couldn't describe how she was hurt and all that because it ends right as she hits the ground, also- Vivian dies at the end, so yeah. The ending took ya off guard, but what did ya maybe fully think of it and what did ya think of Ivy?

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Orenda .
05:43 Nov 11, 2020

okay then. even though Viv may be popular, Ivy went too far.

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B. W.
05:45 Nov 11, 2020

do ya maybe like any of the characters in this or no?

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Orenda .
06:18 Nov 11, 2020

it's just the first part, so dont feel connected to them.

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B. W.
06:19 Nov 11, 2020

Uh- i dont think there'll be a second part or anything. I already have a few other series that I have to do and i'd like to keep this as a cliff-hanger ending to the story and just not continue it- maybe there'll eventually be like a prequel though.

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Amaya .
04:43 Nov 11, 2020

"as I tried to prepare myself for the inevitable to come." you don't have to say to come, you can just say "as I tried to prepare myself for the inevitable" woahhhh I was NOT expecting that ending. Wow. I love that, that was really really amazing. I loved this story, super well-written, amazing in general. I love the last sentence especially, and how you kinda showed some chemistry between the main character and Ash (idk if that was on purpose of not) which kind of added something else to the story. It makes you care even more about what ...

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B. W.
04:45 Nov 11, 2020

The ending really surprised ya then? I honestly don't know and I dunno how to check, its a bit over 1000 words though, that's all I even know. Though thanks, I'm really glad ya liked the story and all that ^^

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Amaya .
04:46 Nov 11, 2020

oh yeah it def surprised me, I was expecting something less brutal lmaoo but I loved it! I liked it a lot. <3 good jobbb I'm so proud of you my queen B :)

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B. W.
04:47 Nov 11, 2020

wait, by "less brutal" what do ya mean? like what did ya think would happen instead of the actual ending?

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Coco Longstaff
11:31 Jan 02, 2021

Ugh people stop being rude to B.W. please and just appreciate all the hard work she’s been doing. B I love your story and keep writing amazingly!

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B. W.
17:10 Jan 02, 2021

Awww, thanks ^^

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Coco Longstaff
22:45 Jan 02, 2021

☺️

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B. W.
01:03 Jan 03, 2021

Wait, did you see some of the comments or something?

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Coco Longstaff
01:04 Jan 03, 2021

Yes

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Coco Longstaff
01:04 Jan 03, 2021

Yes but I’m not worried or anything

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12:15 Dec 25, 2020

Sweet Revenge -- I immediately thought of the K drama.

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B. W.
14:52 Dec 25, 2020

Did ya maybe have a favorite part?

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17:50 Dec 05, 2020

Hello, Luna! It's nice to see you join Reedsy. P.S. (as Brooke) (Only reply to this part) To be Luna Lovegood, there are a couple of things you have to do. First of all, anything that goes wrong, say that you suspect it's because of Nargles (no one knows what they are). Also, talk about the Quibbler. It is a magazine that you can almost always find Luna carrying with her. It is filled with bits and pieces of different oddities. Finally, Luna always wears a necklace with a turnip charm.

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B. W.
18:00 Dec 05, 2020

(Alright then, i think i could try to do that stuff, it seems easy ^^ is that everything or is there still some other stuff?)

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18:03 Dec 05, 2020

(as Brooke) that should be it. If someone asks you a question about Luna and you don't know the answer you can just comment on one of my stories or this conversation and I can tell you. ^^

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B. W.
18:06 Dec 05, 2020

(alrighty that sounds like a plan ^^ should I start being Luna now and talking to Hermione and the others fully now?)

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18:11 Dec 05, 2020

(as Brooke) Yes, probably. "Pansy Parkinson" is Megan Sutherland, Cho Chang is Celeste, Ginny Weasley is also Celeste, and I honestly can't remember who the other Ginny Weasley is...

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B. W.
18:13 Dec 05, 2020

(is there anyone else on here who's a Harry Potter character?)

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18:12 Dec 05, 2020

I just realized that the other Ginny Weasley is Amaya.

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Kate Ulrich
16:40 Nov 19, 2020

Hi!

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B. W.
18:37 Nov 19, 2020

how are ya?

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Kate Ulrich
01:10 Nov 20, 2020

Fine, do you need any help with your stories?

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B. W.
01:53 Nov 20, 2020

Kind of

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Kate Ulrich
12:57 Nov 20, 2020

What's up ?

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B. W.
17:20 Nov 20, 2020

well, what do ya think about the new prompts?

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16:04 Nov 17, 2020

Hey, B! Do you want to do an upvote exchange? (100 points)

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B. W.
18:11 Nov 17, 2020

Maybe we could do 50 or 60 if that's alright? I'm kinda busy with some stuff

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18:45 Nov 17, 2020

Yeah, that's totally fine!

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B. W.
19:50 Nov 17, 2020

alright tell me when your done and then ill do you

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21:06 Nov 17, 2020

okay!

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B. W.
22:22 Nov 17, 2020

yay ^^

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03:06 Nov 17, 2020

Hey, B! Are you going to change your name or profile pic sometime??

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B. W.
03:25 Nov 17, 2020

Huh? why are you asking?

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03:33 Nov 17, 2020

Just because I was GOING to change mine, but not anymore haha! Also, I was just wondering, what is your profile picture of?? :)

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B. W.
03:42 Nov 17, 2020

I honestly dont remember what exactly it is or where I found it :/

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14:48 Nov 17, 2020

Hahaha, me neither, well, i can't tell what it is!

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Itay Frenkel
01:44 Nov 15, 2020

I liked this story, the pace was quick and it was a fun read. Also, a lot more realistic than what you normally write, and you pulled it off. The begging was a little confusing for me, as I wasn't sure who 'we' were or what was happening, but that got cleared up pretty quickly. I was also a little confused with why Vivian deserved to die, I never really saw her do anything particularly cruel. That being said, this was a really fun read, good job B! Could you check out my new story 'A Night to Forget?'

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B. W.
02:09 Nov 15, 2020

well, "We" was supposed to be Ivy, Vivian and Ash walking through the hall and into one of the classrooms, though I think ya just said it cleared up for you. That's the thing, Ivy killed Vivian for her own reasons, she hated that she was popular and some other things that weren't fully stated or some of the stuff she thought about Vivian, Ivy was probably the only one that thought Vivian should die for it. though thank you a lot and I'm glad that ya really liked the story ^^ I wanted to try to just do a regular realistic story and this is pr...

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20:23 Nov 11, 2020

Oooo that ending was NOT what I expected XD (not in a bad way, the ending was beautiful 😉) I didn't notice any grammer mistakes, so pat on the back! This was a really nice story, great job!

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B. W.
20:49 Nov 11, 2020

Thanks, im glad that ya liked the story ^^ what do ya think about Ivy and what she did at the end of the story?

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22:19 Nov 11, 2020

Tbh Ivy kinda hated Vivian for no reason, and I think Vivian wanted to be her friend, cause why else would she invite Ivy to her treehouse? If you did a part 2, I think maybe you could add more reasons to why Ivy feels so tense around Vivian

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B. W.
22:51 Nov 11, 2020

Actually, Ivy does have a few reasons for hating Vivian, I could ya if you want?

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23:52 Nov 11, 2020

I've got some speculating theories, for starters, I think that they used to be close, until Vivian got popular, or maybe it's something more personal, but either way, Part 2 would be really nice, to explain why Ivy did what she did. But it's all up to you 😁

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B. W.
23:58 Nov 11, 2020

I don't think ill make a part 2 for this and that it'll only be a stand-alone thing. what are some of your other theories?

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Kate Ulrich
16:50 Nov 11, 2020

Hey! I liked this one a lot. You built up to the ending very well. Is there going to be a second part?

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B. W.
16:52 Nov 11, 2020

thanks, im glad ya liked it ^^ no i dont think that there will be a part 2 or anything else, its just a stand-alone story. what do ya think about Ivy and what she did at the end?

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Kate Ulrich
16:56 Nov 11, 2020

I feel bad for Ivy because judging by what she did to Vivian, she has a troubled backstory. It doesn't seem like she thought it through and I think she might regret it later. But it doesn't make me dislike her as a character- it makes me more interested, and want to know more about her.

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B. W.
16:57 Nov 11, 2020

What do ya think her troubled backstory is or something?

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Kate Ulrich
13:04 Nov 12, 2020

I don't know... but I don't think it was easy.

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B. W.
17:27 Nov 12, 2020

do ya think your gonna make a new story soon?

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