You Know Youโ€™re Screwed When a Clown Needs World-Saving Help

Submitted into Contest #100 in response to: Start or end your story with two characters sitting down for a meal.... view prompt

208 comments

Fantasy Teens & Young Adult Funny

Nothing screams awkward silence like a cynical hacker and a clown discussing the fate of the world on a date.

Or, the supposed fate of the world, as the meet-up form insisted.

Iโ€™m pretty sure it was just a ruse.

And apparently this wasnโ€™t a date.

โ€œHi, Iโ€™m Cy.โ€

I tried to be friendly first, of course. As a 14-year-old emo hacker stuck with the fantasy name Cynan Moonpine, I felt lucky to have anybody pay me for my hobby. But pay they did, and the variety of people coming to me was constantly astounding; today it was a brightly-dressed clown who requested this fancy restaurant for the meet-up, on her.

By hacking, I mean nothing illegal, nothing crazy. I was just a dramatic computer nerd trying to make some money, and besidesโ€”it was fun finding backdoors and glitches online.

So here we were.

And then there was the clown.

โ€œHi,โ€ she said, makeup caked on her face, complete with plastic glasses, a crimson wig, and the whole shabang of a costume. โ€œYouโ€™re the hacker?โ€

โ€œYeah,โ€ I said, then jumped right in. โ€œSoโ€ฆwhat do you want? Revenge? Hackinโ€™ back a bad hacker who stole all your money?ย Something more chill like computer help? Getting back a permanently deleted file? What?โ€

โ€œActually, I was kind of hoping youโ€™d be the bad hacker today.โ€

My eyes widened. โ€œPardon moi?โ€

She sighed. โ€œDonโ€™t look at me like that. Youโ€™ve got it all: shaggy black hair, dark eyes, black clothes and sunglasses. Youโ€™re obviously the kind of kid whoโ€™s going to try to take over the world someday. Letโ€™s keep this hushed-up and you walk away with all the money you want. Remember what I said about the fate of the world?โ€

I sputtered a few curses. โ€œWhaโ€”what do you mean, clown girl? What are you asking me to do and why does it sound like thereโ€™s gonna be threats involved?โ€ย 

โ€œDonโ€™t call me that. This is a disguise.โ€

My eyes widened. โ€œFrom whom?โ€

โ€œThis doesnโ€™t matter,โ€ the clown pressed. โ€œListen to me, Cy. I want you to hack into the biggest bank accounts in the world and hand it all over to me.โ€

My eyes widened further. At this point I was on the road to looking like a cartoon character.

โ€œAnd it sounds like there will be threats involved because there will be,โ€ she added coolly.

Before I could react (or get away), a waitress stopped by our booth, taking in the scene. โ€œHello, welcome to the Lily May Diner, how may I hโ€”โ€

The clown waved her off. Immediately the waitress stopped, eyes flaring red as her hands dropped to her hips and she walked off.

I stared at the clown, warning signs shrieking in my mind. โ€œHow did you do that? And whatโ€™s your name, anyways?โ€

โ€œCall me Valentina,โ€ she says. โ€œNo more questions now. I need money, lots of it, and we need to hurry.โ€

โ€œWhy do you need money if you can afford this?โ€ I gestured to the restaurant.

โ€œNot for me. For him.โ€

I didnโ€™t like this. I started edging out of my bench. โ€œIโ€™m just going to goโ€ฆโ€ย 

Valentina clamped a hand on my shoulder, but before she could stop me, shouted, โ€œDuck!โ€

BOOOOOOM!

She shoved me down just as an explosion rattled in the distance, a shock wave crashing into the wall behind Valentina. My head disappeared under the table and I felt chunks of plaster raining down. More booms echoed in the distance and my breath caught under the tableโ€”a string of explosions going off in the distance.

I inhaled raggedly as Valentina yanked me up again. She was streaked with soot but not damaged in the least, which I could barely believe since the view of the Arizona desert was clear behind her. There was no wall, chunks of plaster littered across the table. I narrowly survived, so how did she?

I did not like this, not one bit. I was cool with retrieving โ€œpermanently goneโ€ adorable cat videos for $50. I was not okay with this mysterious female clown, her rushed threats and now explosions.

โ€œHow are youโ€”โ€

โ€œListen, Cynan,โ€ Valentina said, holding my shoulders. โ€œI am deeply in debt to a certain man who will stop at nothing to inflict punishment. The world will burn without your immediate help. Will you?โ€

I could only think of one thing at the moment.

I ripped off her wig, glasses, and nose in one swipe, splashing my water cup on her for good measure, determined to find out who this lady really was.

I gasped.

In front of me was the most beautiful person Iโ€™d ever seen. Dark curls waterfalled down from under the wig, tanned skin and wide hazel eyes. Even through her dripping makeup I was hypnotized.

Not even fazed, Valentina scowled, โ€œOh, whyโ€™d you have to do that?โ€ย 

She yanked me through the hole in the wall and dragged me a solid hundred feet into the desert, the screams of fleeing people behind us fading. She pushed my computer into my hands. โ€œAre you going to help you or not?โ€

Before I could answer, another series of BOOMS! echoed across the desert. I couldnโ€™t think to react, my eyes just squinting shut in contrast to the overpowering sound.

Silence.

I was alive.

I opened my eyes, shocked I still eXiStEd. Glancing around, a ten-foot beaming shield surrounded Valentina and I, swirling green energy in a dome. The gorgeous girl, maybe in her early 20โ€™s, had completely transformedโ€”her clown costume and remaining makeup was gone, now dressed in a fitting white blouse, pleated mini skirt with a gold hem, a thick golden belt wrapped around her waist. Her makeup was replaced and now she was literally ten feet tall.

Well then.

โ€œO-okay,โ€ I stuttered, my body becoming one giant heartbeat. One thing was for sure through the chaos of the last ten minutes: I didnโ€™t have a choice but to help this used-to-be-clown. Hacking into super-security digital banks seemed like a breeze compared to meeting whatever was in the distance. โ€œBut one thing. Before I help you, youโ€™ve gotta explain.โ€

At first I was worried Valentina would refuse and Iโ€™d be left more confused and panicked than ever, but her eyes just gleamed. โ€œCan I trust you?โ€

โ€œโ€ฆYes?โ€

She took a deep breath. โ€œI hope youโ€™re telling the truth. But okay. Yโ€™know Ancient Greek mythology, Zeus and Hera and all that?โ€

โ€œYup.โ€ย 

โ€œSo that stuff exists.โ€

I blinked at her. โ€œLike, Latin class? Is real?!โ€

She chuckled. โ€œYeah.โ€

โ€œAnd areโ€ฆare you a god?โ€

She laughed again. โ€œโ€ฆYeah.โ€

I gaped.

โ€œWellโ€ฆmaybe I should be more specific. Iโ€™m Aphroditeโ€™s daughter. With whom? I dunno. Iโ€™m basically a minor god, not of anything in particular, just a girl with some magic. Also, the guy I owe is Hades.โ€

I choked, pointing to the distance. โ€œThatโ€™s Hades?โ€

โ€œUh-huh.โ€

I started pacing. โ€œDonโ€™t you think you should have mentioned your pissed off the frigging god of the Underworld before putting my life in danger?โ€

โ€œOh, PLEASE. Everyoneโ€™s lives are in danger if you donโ€™t hurry up and help.โ€

โ€œGimme a second,โ€ I said. I wanted a little more info first. โ€œWhat happened between you and the god of the dead?โ€

Another boom rang out, the wave crumbling when it hit Valentinaโ€™s force field. I wasnโ€™t even fazed. She said, โ€œI, uh, mightโ€™ve charmed like ten thousand ghosts to come to Earth as my own private army. And steal a lot of Hadesโ€™ riches on the way here.โ€

โ€œUh.โ€

โ€œAnd ghosts are totally careless so they destroyed it all.โ€

โ€œUm. Yikes.โ€

โ€œSo yeah, I owe Hades like a billion dollars and I didnโ€™t even get my army.โ€

I stared at the pouting goddess. โ€œCanโ€™t you get the money yourself? And doesnโ€™t Hades just have more gold or whatever?โ€

Valentina laughed dryly. Boom! โ€œWow, get the money myself. Why didnโ€™t I think of that? But no, Cy. Goddesses canโ€™t directly interfere with human wealth, just use humans to get us the money that we can exchange with godly currency. And yes, while Hades has much more underground wealth, he isโ€ฆkinda a butt. Peeved easily and doesnโ€™t forgive and forget much. Heโ€™ll easily wipe out half of humanity to get to me.โ€

I shivered. โ€œAwesome.โ€ย 

Another string of explosions rang out, the smoke plumes much closer. โ€œThatโ€™s him,โ€ Valentina stressed. โ€œAnd my shield wonโ€™t hold against him directly. You gonna help, hacker boy?โ€

โ€œFine, clown girl. Give me my laptop.โ€

She picked my bag back up and shoved it into my arms. I slid out the silver laptop, the ground quivering as dust and smoke billowed in distant Arizona. I breathed slowly to calm myself as I typed in my password. Half an hour ago, I was vibing at the fancy restaurant. Now the clown had turned into a ten-foot Barbie, saying she was a goddess, and that she needed me to get her money ASAP so Hades didnโ€™t rip apart the world.

Lovely.

โ€œSo what do you want me to do exactly?โ€

โ€œGo to the Bank of America site,โ€ Valentina instructed, hands raised to enforce the shield. โ€œOkay, now open another tabโ€ฆyeahโ€ฆyeah, hereโ€™s the database of namesโ€ฆpossible passwordsโ€ฆperfect.โ€

Though wholly confused but with Valentinaโ€™s instructions, I managed to successfully, however slowly, bypass the security. A cloud rolled over the sun, bitter raindrops falling through the summer weather and bouncing off the shield.

โ€œWeโ€™re running out of time,โ€ Valentina hissed, hands poised below the emerald shield.

More explosions echoed. I worked more urgently with the aid of her magic, suddenly knowing all sorts of methods, secret windows and passcodes. I finally reached some rich guysโ€™ bank account.

โ€œWoah,โ€ I said, wide-eyed at the screen. I expected the hidden databaseโ€™s top user to be rich, but I could barely say the number of online dollars stacked up once Valentina gave me the final password.

BOOM! Boomboomboom!

โ€œHurry up, Cynan!โ€ Valentina yelped. โ€œHades taking this long means he has an armyโ€”primarily to strike fear, I bet.โ€

โ€œI am not scared!โ€

โ€œLiar!โ€ she shouted, kneeling down, elbows bent, the green shield shrinking around us as smoke billowed.

Adrenaline coursed through my veins. I showed her the screen. โ€œWeโ€™re in!โ€

โ€œWhose bank is that?!โ€

โ€œI dunno, the computer just led me here!โ€

She peered closer, her goddess body shrinking by the second as her power channeled into the shield. โ€œYou idiot! You literally hacked Zeusโ€™ bank account!โ€

โ€œHe has one of those?โ€ I said, clinging to Valentina, then yelped.

Suddenly a human figure rushed out of the smoke and sound outside our shield (now the size of a broom closet, while still-gorgeous Valentina was the size of a human again) and pounded at the dome. I screamed. Other โ€œpeopleโ€ emerged from the dust store now raging above and banged on our faltering shield, but they werenโ€™t reallyโ€ฆpeople. They had the figurines of humans, but six or seven feet tall and pitch black. It was like they were made of darknessโ€”from the front, dark features blurred together, only the whites of their eyes clearly visible. Ink curled off them, sloshing to the ground then evaporating as black mist. Between the cries they made and their size, this army of the dead was a lot freakier than ghosts or zombies.

โ€œYes!โ€ Valentina glanced around, her shield faltering in second-long gaps now. Her face scrunched with effort. โ€œBut we canโ€™t afford to waste any more time. This shield will be gone in seconds and weโ€™re going to face Hades.โ€

โ€œWeโ€™ll be okay, right?โ€ I whimpered, hugging my laptop to my chest. It was hard to keep a cool expression in the heat of an attack.

โ€œMaybe. Stealing billions from the most powerful god doesnโ€™t seem very โ€˜okayโ€™, but at least we wonโ€™t be picked apart by Hades if we play this right. At least until Zeus gets a *wind* of this.โ€

Bang, bang, bang!ย 

The army continued attacking. Valentina heaved ragged breaths. Now that I knew she was a goddess, it was easy to remember she wasnโ€™t a very powerful goddess. A daughter of the goddess of love and beauty, for godsโ€™ sake.

โ€œHaha, very funny,โ€ I deadpanned. โ€œAnd yeah, if Zeus ever comes down to bash some heads after his account gets drained, Iโ€™m not helping.โ€

โ€œWeโ€™ll see, Cy.โ€ A smile tugged at her lips. โ€œNowโ€” DOWN!โ€

BANGGGCRASHHHKKKKPOW!

A second after she said the word, the shield was shattered by the fists of the dark army. Green splintered everywhere, pellets of the dome bouncing off me. I clenched my eyes and clung to Valentina, expecting the figures to overwhelm us. But instead my stomach dropped and a cool breeze whisked through my mind.

When I opened my eyes, I was in a different place.

Another cracked desert resembling Arizona, but the sky opened to pitch black, stars consumed by unnatural darkness. An extended spotlight covered us, but a hundred feet off the ground the light melted to black.

I shakily rose to my feet, glancing around. My laptop was in Valentinaโ€™s arm, her other around me.

In front of us was Hades.

(I supposedโ€”I could still quite possibly have gone insane.)

Ten yards in front of us was a tall, pitch-black figurine. A huge black cape lined in silver was draped over his body, an old-fashioned knightโ€™s helmet over his head. Emotionless and cold, no exposed skin.

Valentina crouched down and opened my laptop, mouthing one word: Stall.

โ€œโ€ฆHi,โ€ I said as Valentina opened the bank account out of the corner of my eye, clicking a button titled โ€œtransfer moneyโ€. She started chanting softly under her breath. โ€œI supposed youโ€™re Hades? Where are we?โ€

โ€œA private meeting spot.โ€ Hades chuckled, but it sounded wrong. Like nails on a chalkboard but more ancient, evil. โ€œAnd yes.โ€

โ€œWhat do you want with us?โ€ I demanded, confidence growing. Even if I knew the answer.

Valentina continued typing and chant-whispering.ย 

โ€œI want nothing with you, young boy,โ€ Hades sighed. โ€œYou look bad in black, by the way.โ€ I rolled my eyes. The guy wearing, like, two pieces of clothing said my dark attire was bad. โ€œI want a word with our dear Valentina.โ€ย 

One more moment, she mouthed.

I cleared my throat. โ€œWhy?โ€

โ€œYou know, donโ€™t you?โ€

I blinked innocently.

He groaned like rust. โ€œThis pretty little menace made away with priceless precious gems and gold. Plus a ghost army. Which is stupid, by the way, because all ghosts do is try to jump-scare you!โ€

Valentina paid no mind, typing away. She started ritually waving her hands over the laptop. What the heck was she doing?

โ€œUmโ€ฆsorry,โ€ I told him. โ€œAnd who are you again?โ€

โ€œIโ€™m Hades, Cynan. Lord of the Underworld. God of the Dead. That kind of thing.โ€

I gulped. โ€œJust wanted to confirm.โ€ While the god was a bit more humorous than I expected, I could barely believe this was happening. I mouthed to Val, Hurry up!

Almost done!

โ€œActually, itโ€™s annoying,โ€ Hades continued. A swirl of mist curled around him. โ€œPeople always confuse me for Thanos, or worse, Satan. Thanos is the god of death! He kills you! I just give you a nice little afterlife.โ€ He glared daggers. โ€œUnless you were bad, which means youโ€™re going straight to the Fields of Punishment. But yes, it hurts when people call me the Devil! Sorry I like black. Sorry everyone attributes me with sadness. Iโ€™m not even the one whoโ€™s cheated on my wife like a thousand times!โ€

He sneered at the sky.ย 

I would have laughed at his prod to Zeus, but I was more focused on the mini tornado picking up around Hades as his attitude worsened.

The god turned back to me, and I imagined a sick smile spreading across his face. He edged forward, the storm growing. โ€œNow, Cynan, itโ€™s your time to get out of the way. I need to have a chat with Valentina.โ€

โ€œWhat? Nโ€”โ€

Val shushed me, standing up. โ€œIโ€™m done.โ€ She smiled sweetly at Hades. โ€œHey.โ€

โ€œHello. Do you prefer death or paying up?โ€

โ€œWell technically, you canโ€™t kill mโ€”โ€

โ€œI can sure try,โ€ he interrupted.

My breath caught. This was it. Unless Val managed to get the god his money from Zeusโ€™ bank account, both of us were toast.

โ€œWell, they neednโ€™t be a problem,โ€ she said, smoothing a hand down her skirt though her voice trembled. โ€œWeโ€™ve got the money.โ€

โ€œYou do?โ€

Hades seemed surprised. Valentina nodded, and shakily opened my laptop. She whispered one final Greek verse until her breath, thenโ€ฆ

Pop!

A single sheet of paper twirled to the ground next to Hades. The dark god edged closer and picked it up as Val asserted, โ€œThatโ€™s it. Thereโ€™s your money.โ€

Hades inspected the paper, and then the world melted into darkness.



*



Back at the diner with Val the Clown, we had a lilโ€™ chat.

โ€œSo what was that?โ€ I said, still quivering.

โ€œA check.โ€

โ€œA check?โ€

She nodded, waving away another waitress. When Hades teleported us out of the strange place, the restaurant was magically restored. None of the people were screaming, so I supposed their memories were wiped clean of the explosions (which they apparently survived). โ€œFor a gazillion billion dollars.โ€

โ€œNot a number.โ€

She smirked, adjusting her wig. โ€œHades seemed to accept it.โ€

I considered this. โ€œSo weโ€™re not gonna die?โ€

โ€œUntil Zeus learns this happened, yes, but weโ€™re on good terms so hopefully heโ€™ll let us go.โ€

โ€œYou, not us.โ€

โ€œYouโ€™re the one who hacked the account, Cynan.โ€

I rolled my eyes. โ€œVal.โ€

She laughed. โ€œKidding. Thanks for helping me out today. Name your price.โ€

โ€œOh, shut up. Iโ€™d say no worries, but there were a lot of worries. Still, the hacking-and-world-saving is on me.โ€

She grinned. โ€œThanks, Cy. But thereโ€™s one thing I am doing for you.โ€ She waved a waitress over and turned back to me, sliding a menu over along with my laptop. โ€œGet anything you want. Itโ€™s on Zeus.โ€



July 02, 2021 03:08

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

208 comments

03:19 Jul 02, 2021

Short version: This is random, I kinda like it, I loosely used the Reedsy Plot Generator and also I had to cut this down by 1k words lol, enjoy! Long version: VICTORYYYYY ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰ I originally finished this mess at, like, 4k words, and posted it in a pretty rough shape. Hours later I took it down and streamlined it literally as much as I could over yesterday and today. FINALLY I BULLIED THE WORLD COUNT UNDER 3K YAAASSSSSS (even if I had to cut out some solid jokes and stuff to do so :d) Still a mess tho~ ๐Ÿ˜ญโœŒ๏ธ ๐ŸŒˆOkay, tbh, morso โ€œrandomโ€ than โ€œtra...

Reply

03:20 Jul 02, 2021

this was frigging long yโ€™all have another feast: ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ yesss yโ€™all be getting rainbows, THE FOOD OF THE GODS MAN, except for Hades sorry Hades but why do I feel like everything you eat is pomegranates or poisoned apples-

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Ruth Smith
20:19 Jul 02, 2021

Really good story. I would have liked to have read the 4K version, but you did a great job cutting it down.

Reply

02:12 Jul 03, 2021

Thank you so much! Haha, I promise the 4k version was kinda icky, mostly a lot of extra and inefficient words (but also some extra dialogue lines I condensed) :D

Reply

Ruth Smith
03:32 Jul 03, 2021

Then you are a rather good editor. Figuring out what works and what doesn't is an art.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Amany Sayed
19:31 Jul 02, 2021

This was so funny. Sounds sarcastic when I put it with a period...So funny :D That's more like it. I love the names so much! And the ending is fun too. Writing greek mythology has been on my writer bucket list for so long now, and you're so good at it. I always love Hades' character. I mean, he's always funny and not as dark as he's said to be, in everyone's writing. I love it. Keep writing :D

Reply

20:18 Jul 02, 2021

Haha, thanks so much ;D Thank youuuuuuuu! Yus lolz Hades is always more humorous than the real myths so if course I hadda build into that ;D Thank you, you too!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
12:04 Jul 02, 2021

I haven't even read the actual story yet, I just read the title and I'm dying XD

Reply

16:00 Jul 02, 2021

Ahaha thank you XDD

Reply

16:16 Jul 02, 2021

You're welcome XDDD

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Esther :)
18:11 Jul 02, 2021

๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€...

Reply

20:15 Jul 02, 2021

๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ...

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Annalisa D.
13:18 Jul 02, 2021

Very creative and fun story! I enjoyed reading it. I did notice a typo. "I inhaled raggedlh as Valentina yanked me up again." I think you meant raggedly.

Reply

16:00 Jul 02, 2021

Thank you! Ah, thanks for catching that!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply

OMG AERIIIINNNNNNN THIS IS SO GOOD!!!!!! You amaze me for the 500000000th time with your insane creativity. How the heck did you come up with this idea? Contemporary fiction mixed with Greek mythology?? I love your writing style because you make it so easy to picture what's happening in the story. Great job on this story!!!

Reply

16:14 Jul 02, 2021

ACKCKKK TYSM SUHANI!!!!!!! Aqkdjsjwjqjsjw thank you!! I really appreciate it :DD <33

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply

Nice job cutting things down! Both versions were amazing ofc :P I'm still loving the last line, "It's on Zeus," It just ties the whole thing pErFeCtLy Anyways, loved the concept!

Reply

14:16 Jul 04, 2021

Ack thanks hehe :P Yayyyyyy thanks, I was kinda proud of the last line this time around :D Tysm, Starry! XDD How are youuu

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Tricia Shulist
16:42 Jul 03, 2021

Thanks, that was fun. I enjoyed the irreverence of the story. Mythology with a 2021 vibe. Nice.

Reply

17:29 Jul 03, 2021

Haha thanks!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
18:06 Jul 02, 2021

The creativity is mind blowing!, I appreciate it when people are able to think outside the box and create something unique. I never would have thought a story like this would come out of this particular prompt . Well done!.

Reply

20:17 Jul 02, 2021

Thank you so much! :D

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Veronica M
17:35 Jul 02, 2021

Poll: ๐Ÿ“ Poll 2:๐Ÿง Poll 3: ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ

Reply

20:15 Jul 02, 2021

Thank you! :D

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Cole Lane
15:37 Jul 02, 2021

Wow!!! You had me all the way from the title on in! Enormous world building feat you pulled off, I don't know how you could have trimmed this by a thousand words, it didn't feel like anything was missing. The action and anticipation of impending doom bearing down, you also had the classic 'keep the bad guy talking' lol although Hades does get a bad rap, I agree. :) Seriously though the pace of this was intense and the clown idea was spot on, and hilarious!!! Awesome!!

Reply

16:16 Jul 02, 2021

Wow, thank you hehe!!! Ack, thanks so much! It means a lot lolz :DD Ty!!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Philia S
06:33 Jul 02, 2021

Heya! I loved the story! No notes except a few typos here and there and also you used 'peeps' in a monologue, I suggest you use formal language apart from in dialogues... Loved it! Great Job!

Reply

16:01 Jul 02, 2021

Hii! Thank you! Ooh hehe, just fixed that ;D Tyy <3

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Kat Sencen
03:24 Jul 02, 2021

So I could definitely see the editing and how it paid off. It's a lot shorter and a lot easier to follow. It was also really funny! Besides that, you have my critique from before this was deleted!

Reply

03:28 Jul 02, 2021

Thank you hehe!!! Ah, I was kinda worried I cut some of the funny parts out and all thatโ€™s left was my normal bouncy tone, so thanks for the reassurance haha! Oop, yea, sorry about that, but you were a great beta reader so thank you for that *wiggles eyebrows*

Reply

Kat Sencen
03:32 Jul 02, 2021

Okay, thank you! What did you mean by sorry about that? Also, since I'm on here and you're on here, do you want to do like a feedback-for-feedback? Like I read a story of your choice and vise versa and we both give feedback?

Reply

03:34 Jul 02, 2021

I mean, idk, just that you wrote some thought-out feedback but it for deleted along with the story lolz Ahhh that sounds fun! Iโ€™d love to do it but, like, maybe tomorrow morning?, cuz rn itโ€™s almost midnight here and Iโ€™m a mix between half insane and half asleep soooo- yeah Iโ€™m a mess GOODNIGHT <3

Reply

Kat Sencen
03:37 Jul 02, 2021

Okay! Yes it's fine you deleted it, since I literally just saw you use the advice I gave so you've already "used it going forward," as they say. And I get it... it's not that time yet where I live but I'm already tired... Anyway bye!

Reply

03:38 Jul 02, 2021

:D Byeeeee! (I actually gotta get off Reedsy now but every time I pose a story Iโ€™m liked psyched so ima awkwardly try to tell a few friends through half-lidded eyes for 5 minutes haha-)

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Kendall Defoe
03:24 Jul 17, 2021

I needed this movie in my mind...Thank you!

Reply

14:15 Jul 17, 2021

Haha, thank you!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Sunny ๐ŸŒผ
14:02 Jul 03, 2021

You did it! (I have yet to post a story r.i.p) Tbh I had no idea where this story was going at the beggining. I loved how you made something extremely random make sense towards the end.

Reply

17:29 Jul 03, 2021

Haha thanks so much! (Cโ€™mon sisssss you owe us a new story by the end of the month at least *wiggles eyebrows*)

Reply

Sunny ๐ŸŒผ
18:51 Jul 03, 2021

(i'm TrYiNg! I really wanna get something out either this contest or the next. Will it be good? Maybe)

Reply

19:59 Jul 03, 2021

(oKi!! Ooh sounds good! Cโ€™mon, Iโ€™m sure itโ€™ll be awesome ;D This is random but I STILL remember the first few disaster children stories from like a year ago lol, idk why but itโ€™s like a recurring thought and I always pictured it happening on my patio and also me and my friend Sarah have legitimately brought it up IRL before, idk yuh XDD)

Reply

Sunny ๐ŸŒผ
21:20 Jul 03, 2021

(oh yeah Disaster Child stories! I might revisit them one of these days. Key word: might, motivation isn't really in my inventory rn)

Reply

14:15 Jul 04, 2021

(*tosses some Motivation over to you*)

Reply

Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Sunny ๐ŸŒผ
18:59 Jul 03, 2021

(i'm TrYiNg! I really wanna get something out either this contest or the next. Will it be good? Maybe)

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 2 replies
Show 1 reply
TJ Squared
13:54 Jul 03, 2021

wow XDDDDD I liked the pacing on this, nice and fast, very drawn in until the end! Mythology...I see ya XD Val was a creative character (and so was Cy, but still...) The title kinda made me curious despite it's length (length isn't always a bad thing lolz) Twas definitely a fun story and rather interesting as well :D while Cy was hacking, I was kinda like...wut....cause I mean...eh...it was just...it seemed so simple XD you just hack into Bank of America and them somehow find the richest guy's account and push transfer money...XDDDD anyw...

Reply

17:29 Jul 03, 2021

meep :OO Thank you heheee <33 Ah yea, I was worried bout that, but I dunno how to make it simpler and because there was โœจmagicโœจ helping him I was like whatever, โœจMAGICCCโœจ Thank you thank you :DD Yussss *one mil rainbows*

Reply

TJ Squared
17:57 Jul 03, 2021

:)))) Ofc <333 MaGiC lol I get that XD :DDD XD yus ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ

Reply

14:15 Jul 04, 2021

๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ๐ŸŒˆ SO HOW YA DOINGGGG

Reply

TJ Squared
14:28 Jul 04, 2021

Doing pretty well :)))) hbu?

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply

Geez this is good! No- epically awesomeistly great (so weird- idk) I LUVVV mythology, and action stuff, so this is just takin' the cake for me. I mean, it's a burrito of funny, action-y, mythology and overall greatness. This frickin' ROCKS. Omg- I haven't been on is so loooong. If I already have a comment- sowwy.

Reply

01:48 Oct 30, 2021

Ahahah thank you!!!!! Yessssssssss same, I love writing that stuff!!! THANK YOU lol no worries, same here

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Jon R. Miller
05:23 Aug 07, 2021

This was excellent!! I liked this soooo much! ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘๐ŸปโœจA good story about a hacker, a goddess, and a heist.

Reply

14:44 Aug 08, 2021

Thank you so much! :D

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
09:29 Jul 20, 2021

"I owe Hades a billion dollars" I die laughing!

Reply

15:17 Jul 20, 2021

thank you lol <3

Reply

18:52 Jul 20, 2021

LOL

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Reedsy | Default โ€” Editors with Marker | 2024-05

Bring your publishing dreams to life

The world's best editors, designers, and marketers are on Reedsy. Come meet them.