The Windโ€™s Lost Children

Submitted into Contest #86 in response to: Set your story at a park during a spring festival.... view prompt

49 comments

Teens & Young Adult Friendship Fiction

Mona!" Bennet exclaimed, not sounding all too happy to see the witch once more. Her red and purple cloak waved in the wind, adorned with tarnished gold that helped to weigh it down. Her sneer broke Fischl's silence.ย 

"Twas this only such a mere glimpse of stupidity?" Fischl screamed. "Thou truly is a court jester of marvels!"

"I don't understand," Mona brushed a hand through her hair. "Why are you so mad? And who's the boy behind you?"

"Razor not boy!" Razor growled at her. The cocky woman backed up before brandishing her tome.ย 

"I took out the camp when you two idiots weren't helping," Mona shrugged it all off. "I don't see the problem"

Fischl crossed her thin arms. "Then perhaps the stars are as doomed as they appear to be. Bennet, explain what we witnessed in Mondstadt's town square at once!"

Bennet nodded, a solemn look crossing his face. "The knights of Favonious are split. Jean seems to be unconscious, and the plan is to have the abyss order attempt to cross the bridge to take them all out at once. We were going to stalk this camp before night and then take it out. Now the attention will be tracked here. More importantly, they will be attracted to us"

"Well, I'll be!" Mona threw her hands up into the air. "Perhaps if someone had explained the plan?"

"Mayhaps thou shant run off at any moment!"

"Razor has plan!" the wolf boy shouted over them. The trio of adventurers stared at him in shock before Mona broke out into uproarious laughter.ย 

"The kid has a plan?" she asked. "Truly remarkable"

"Abyss attracted to scent," he nodded. "Not place"

"Yes," Fischl put her hand up to her mouth, hiding a shock of laughter as she realized Razor's plan. "That's right"

"Lady has perfume," Razor proceeded to pace back and forth. Mona produced a small grey bottle of elegant perfume.ย 

"Hey!" she protested as he tried to snatch it from her hands. "I'm short on money right now! And this is all I could afford!"

Fischl grabbed it from Mona. "What else lays upon thou's conniving mind?"

Razor took the bottle, smashing it at Bennet's feet. The white-haired boy screamed in shock, protecting his eyes.

"Bad luck man," Razor explained. "Abyss will be attracted to scent"

"Are-" Fischl's voice replaced the formal tone with concern. "Are you sure?"

"I'll lead them to the bridge," Bennet nodded. "And then the knights' plan will come into play!"

"Do not wreck your own mortal vessel, my attendant of the night!" Fischl demanded, her green eyes glowing as the sun began to lean across the horizon, dipping gently beneath the surface. "Be careful!"

"Yeah," Bennet shrugged her off. "But I'd do anything for Mondstadt. You have to understand that"

She nodded, letting go of his arm. "Then tis it decided?"

"Yeah!" the bandaged teen threw his hand up into the air, stuck in his trademark pose. "Let's go endanger my life!"

โŠฑ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ {.โ‹… โœฏ โ‹….} โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โŠฐโŠฑ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ {.โ‹… โ™ซ โ‹….} โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โŠฐโŠฑ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ {.โ‹… โœฏ โ‹….} โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โŠฐโŠฑ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ {.โ‹… โ™ซ โ‹….} โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โŠฐ

"Master Albedo!" Sucrose nearly tripped over a jutting rock as she adjusted her glasses, scanning through the ancient code Albedo had passed her. The alchemist himself jumped over a ruin's cascaded pillar. "Master! Where are we going?"

Albedo ran a hand through his flush face, pulling sweat off his ashen locks. "The Thousand Wind's Temple..."

"Thousand Wind... Thousand... Oh!" Sucrose racked her brain for the information. "A large circular building departed many eons ago by an unknown race"

"Like us?"

"Huh?"

Albedo pivoted, blocking his suddenly pale face. "Nothing. Continue; I fed you this information for a reason"

"Yes... um," the green-haired assistant pulled out her own scroll, trying to allow the information to rise on its own. "It's found to be nearly impossible to enter. Many would agree that it's cells ar- wait!"

Albedo took off, already in awe at the sight. "We're here," the alchemist announced. Sucrose studied his expression, surprised for a moment.

"Master Albedo... there's something wrong with your face"

The shadow of a grin approached Albedo's face. "This is it, Sucrose. We can protect Mondstadt"

His face betrayed his own emotions, showing that half-moon hanging lazily upon the white clouds of his face. In truth, he had never been more excited for something. "We should study the cells"

"Absolutely," Sucrose's face grew flush as she fumbled with her tome. "I'll protect you if the need arises, Maste-"

"Don't bother," Albedo coughed. "In fact, I'll protect you. And please, don't call me 'Master'"

"Yes, Mast- oh no!"

The young girl fell to her knees in embarrassment. "I shouldn't have-"

"Sucrose... it's fine. Just please promise me that you won't needlessly hurt yourself"

"Yes," she nodded adamantly. "Now... are we to check the cells first?"

"Absolutely,"ย Albedo took off against the deep green grass, hopping over the stone towers pulsing in the deep red sunlight still hanging onto the world. "Now... Sucrose... I'd like to paint a picture"

"Now?" Sucrose asked. 'I find that painting a picture is hardl-"

Albedo didn't spend a second heeding her words; within a moment, his painting supplies were withdrawn, lying discarded upon the grass. "A moment is only envisioned once. It's important for artists to take it down the moment they realize its purpose. I need a canvas. As much as you can give me, Sucrose"

"Y-yes! But what are you planning?"

Albedo dropped down to his knees, holding a thin paintbrush. "Don't raise your voice at this, but I believe this to be an Abyss order base"

"Oh!" Sucrose exclaimed. "You mean..."

"Yes. There are to be hilichurls swarming the area. We have but a mere hour to ready my labyrinth"

"Labyrinth? You can't mean-"

"Hilichurls have a very low attention span," Albedo explained. "If they were to see a series of paintings similar to the place they are now, I doubt they'd take much time to ponder. However, there have been studies in the past; Ella Musk created poetry that seemed to bring out a different side of the hilichurls, provided you used the correct words. Paintings should have the same effect"

"So you're saying..."

"Hilichurl's have a very intricate design upon their masks," Albedo went to his parchment, streaking orange paint across the canvas. When he swiftly finished one, Sucrose handed him the next. "Now... if they were to be brought to life..."

He held his hand up to the parchment. "Life is created through imagination and concentration... and with the correct methods of alchemy and creativity one will find that...."

The mask design popped up from the parchment, lying on the grass. "One can create a world"

"Master Albedo!" Sucrose clapped her hands together. "That's amazing!"

"I shall create duplicates of their masks," Albedo announced. "Armies of them. They should remain disoriented unless an Abyss mage is to point them in the right direction"

"But what shall we do then?"

Albedo's hand fell to his side, caressing gently around the hilt of a golden sword. "Then we shall have to make quick work of them"

โŠฑ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ {.โ‹… โœฏ โ‹….} โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โŠฐโŠฑ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ {.โ‹… โ™ซ โ‹….} โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โŠฐโŠฑ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ {.โ‹… โœฏ โ‹….} โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โŠฐโŠฑ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ {.โ‹… โ™ซ โ‹….} โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โŠฐ

To say that the knights of Favonius are a hearty bunch would be true; a jolly group as well. But without their leader, one attribute they seem to lack is... well...

"We are so gonna die!" Amber screamed, falling from the sky. Her brown hair stuck up at the edge, her goggles lying strewn as she jumped to the bridge.ย 

"Did you finish the bombs?" Lisa asked, looking up from her book.ย 

"Yes," the outrider held up her head, giving the older woman a thumbs up. โ€œBut... I donโ€™t know if this is gonna work. What if there are too many hilichurls?โ€

โ€œThen we have to get up and fight,โ€ Lisa yawned. โ€œTo be quite honest, I havenโ€™t the foggiest idea of what weโ€™ll do thenโ€

โ€œMarvelous!โ€ Amber smiled despite herself. โ€œKaeya? Do you see them?โ€

โ€œTheyโ€™re heading this way!โ€ The man shouted from atop his vantage point. He hand sat on top of his sword, fidgeting with the holster. โ€œBut... what is with them?โ€

โ€œHuh?โ€ Amber asked. โ€œWait... I think I see the glow!โ€

The trio of knights bolted up, running to the bridge. Before them stood the valley facing Mondstadt, crisp, clear lakes encircling green grass and drawn-in dandelions. In the midst of the darkness held a flickering flame, darting back and forth like a will o wisp.

โ€œBarbara!โ€ Lisa commanded. โ€œI need you to get Jean to wake up!โ€

Barbara looked up from her sister, where Diluc sat, cradling her head between his knees. โ€œSheโ€™s getting better, but canโ€™t guarantee it!โ€

โ€œWhat are those fires, Lisa?โ€

Lisa glanced over to Amber, her drawl growing heavy. โ€œThose were Abyss magesโ€

โ€œWere they the leaders we heard about?โ€

โ€œNo,โ€ the librarian deduced. โ€œThere must be someone more; Amber, youโ€™ve reported that there were Abyss mages surrounding Mondstadt in the last month, correct?โ€

โ€œYes,โ€ the perky brunette recalled. โ€œThere was a growing numberโ€

โ€œPrecisely,โ€ Lisa cleared her throat, pulling her shirt back up to cover herself from the chilling winds. โ€œThey were being organized. But why this date?โ€

โ€œBecause itโ€™s the festival,โ€ Amber retorted, hands on her hips. โ€œDuh. I thought that much was obviousโ€

โ€œYes,โ€ Lisa put a finger to her plush lips, green eyes crossing as they focused on the sight. โ€œBut do hilichurls know of our ceremony? I think itโ€™s rather odd that the monsters should figure it outโ€ย 

โ€œYouโ€™re right!โ€ Amber gasped. โ€œBut that would mea-โ€

โ€œJeanโ€™s awake!โ€ Barbara exclaimed, her musical voice ringing through the streets. โ€œQuick! I need something for her to drinkโ€

Diluc held out a thin flask. โ€œExcuse me?โ€ Barbecue pushed the bottle back. โ€œWe donโ€™t need her getting drunk!โ€

โ€œRelax,โ€ Dilucโ€™s deep voice countered Barbaraโ€™s shrieks. โ€œItโ€™s just grape juiceโ€

โ€œI-โ€ Jean coughed, leaning up off of Dilucโ€™s lap. โ€œWhat time is it?โ€

โ€œDrink first,โ€ Diluc ordered. Surprisingly, the grandmaster obliged, pouring the juice down her throat.

โ€œThe attack has started,โ€ Kaeya mumbled to Jean as he jumped down to the ground. โ€œOur plan is just about to be set offโ€

โ€œPlan?โ€ Jean coughed once more. โ€œWait! You canโ€™t-โ€

โ€œNow, Klee!โ€ Amber shouted over her boss, looking down towards the small child positioned at the entrance.ย 

โ€œJumpty jumpty!โ€ Klee exclaimed with glee, letting out three gargantuan bombs that bounced across the bridge. The hilichurls that had begun to create hordes scoffed at it, their primitive minds still able to dodge the bombs.

โ€œKaboom!โ€ Klee stomped, causing the explosives to detonate. Within seconds, the entire bridge fell into the lake surrounding Mondstadt, drowning armies of hilichurls.

โ€œWe did it!โ€ Amber cried. โ€œWe saved the city!โ€

โ€œExcept,โ€ Diluc pointed out. โ€œYou didnโ€™tโ€

The knights stared back at the water incredulously. Kaeyaโ€™s mouth fell agape. The floating Abyss mages simply stood there. Perhaps thatโ€™s the wrong word; after all, itโ€™s exactly what doomed their plan.

Before the group could scream out in frustration, a purple glow began to highlight the sky. Electricity darted to and fro, catching on the abyss orderโ€™s cloaks.

โ€œItโ€™s...โ€ Jean took a moment to recall the detail.

โ€œTheย Prinzessin der Verurteilung has arrived!โ€ Fischl, Bennet and Mona hoped from the sky, with the two girls landing gracelessly. Bennet fell flat on his face with a loud crunch.

โ€œIโ€™m fine!โ€ He cried, despite the audible sound of his own face. Behind him stood a feral looking teen, his long grey hair reaching the back of his hip.

โ€œRazor help!โ€ The wolf bout helped his friend up with a toothy grin. โ€œAll better!โ€

โ€œBut...โ€ Jean stuttered. โ€œHow did you get here? You were-โ€

โ€œThe bard of the gusts gave us his calling, using divine magic of the gods!โ€

โ€œWho...โ€ Jeanโ€™s voice drifted off as Venti tiptoed out from the shadows.

โ€œI hope Iโ€™m not late,โ€ Venti smiled, plucking a few notes from his lyre. โ€œIs everyone alright?โ€

โ€œNo?โ€ Bennet looked down toward a bit of gravel embedded in his hand.

โ€œYeah!โ€ Venti cried. โ€œThen Windblume can go on!โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s it?โ€ Jean scoffed. โ€œAfter all that, you truly-โ€

โ€œWind,โ€ Venti leaned into Jean. โ€œIs chaotic. Itโ€™s spurred by the simplest things. And sometimes, we have to just let ourselves be guided by it. So the festival must begin; after all, the dandelion puffs donโ€™t stay forever!โ€

Jean smiled, tucking a small dandelion from the garden below behind her ear. โ€œWind doesnโ€™t have to be controlled. I tried to work through my plan, and at the end of the day? All my friends worked through it better than I did. I threw away their words... and you found themโ€

โ€œI like to give people chances,โ€ Venti grinned at the scene before him; the festival was nearly under way, with the knights whooping into the sky, filled with glee.

โ€œAnd sometimes, we barely even notice. The wind often picks up the lost, even when we donโ€™t even knowโ€

March 25, 2021 23:59

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49 comments

Not my favorite, lol. Thanks for holding out on all the nerd stuff! Also... my bio... Iโ€™m in a vibe, hehe. Get ready for some *Jemma* stories.

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Yolanda Wu
01:20 Mar 26, 2021

What an interesting story! I was hooked by the narrative voice and the humour. The character interactions were so fun to read about, you make the dialogue really engaging, I got a sense of each characters' distinct voice. Well done, Ethan!

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Sunny ๐ŸŒผ
15:04 Apr 03, 2021

I still love Venti, I need to get into Genshin Impact so I can love him even more.

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Lol yeah, Venti is so fun. Heโ€™s also very rare in the game though soooo Lol

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Sunny ๐ŸŒผ
15:25 Apr 03, 2021

Ah i see

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Lol, thereโ€™s one girl youโ€™d love that wasnโ€™t in this story though

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Sunny ๐ŸŒผ
15:32 Apr 03, 2021

oh?

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Her name is hu Tao; sheโ€™s a funeral director, and very morbid

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Stormi Gales
16:14 Mar 29, 2021

Oh wow this was so good! I love fantasy and this was intriguing! You are so talented! Dialogue doesn't come easy to me but it's so natural with you. This seems like there is definitely more to it and when I have the time I'm going to dive into your previous posts. I wasn't expecting something like this after the Kalmin Boomer piece which was awesome and very slice of life. This is more of an isekai?(spelling? ) like reincarnated as a slime vibes. You HAVE to write your own light novel series. I can legitimately see you getting a manga and a...

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Thank you! I'm kinda writing a light novel series anyway, so that's always reassuring! Your words are too kind, you know that! Lol. 25 submissions, yeah, and like 12 of them are part of a series too. I always forget how long I've been here! I guess it's because I write from emotion, and since my life is (purposely) a (n amazingly fun) wreck right now, it just ends up benefiting from the disaster! I'd love to get an anime, lol. Or a manga. OOh and also I'm writing something for this prompt I think you'll like, but I REALLY hope it doesn't get...

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Stormi Gales
17:13 Mar 29, 2021

Oh I loved pretty little liars when it first came out. I read alot, I love reading and its not "too kind" it's TRUE. I think you have a really great way of having characters interact with eachother. You're writing reminds me of the early SAO light novels. I definitely know you have alot of talent and creativity. I'm becoming a fan lol. Plus it's always great to meet a fellow manga/anime fan. I can see it greatly inspires your work.

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Thank you! And oh yeah, it absolutely inspires me. I have nearly a thousand references in my next story, from Madonna to Heathers, from Junko Enoshima to pretty little liars. I kinda keep creating my type in characters (as well as someone that kinda ends up as a self-insert) and this next one is that, but like garishly pink.

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Stormi Gales
17:45 Mar 29, 2021

Well I can't wait to read it and there's absolutely nothing wrong with pink lol I find myself getting stuck in your submissions and not reading anyone else's lol. You're really going somewhere I think. So many people are redefining shounen lately and I think you would be the perfect candidate to redefine it again.

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By redefining shonen, do you mean like changing it up? Like how the old anime was all like dragon ball or whatever and now it's mha and attack on titan? Lol, I wish. Like, that would literally be amazing. A few years ago, I wanted a stable job and no attention; now it's the exact opposite.

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Malini S.
15:42 Mar 27, 2021

Ahhh I love the group dynamics, your dialogue is always so well-written and friendshipโ€™s my weakness when it comes to reading, especially with a bunch of chaotic characters like these guys, awesomee :))

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๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ๐Ÿฆˆ...

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THIS IS AWESOME! Great job! :D I- Iโ€™m sorry, I canโ€™t stop laughing- XD โ€˜ Bennet fell flat on his face with a loud crunch. โ€œIโ€™m fine!โ€ He cried, despite the audible sound of his own face. Behind him stood a feral looking teen, his long grey hair reaching the back of his hip. โ€œRazor help!โ€ The wolf bout helped his friend up with a toothy grin. โ€œAll better!โ€ โ€˜

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Lol why do people love my writing (sweats nervously) Yes, I am one of those people who can't accept praise, lol. THANK U!!!!!!!!!

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Because itโ€™s so good! :D XD

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:) thank u my confidence has down the drain for the last 1000 years

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NUUU. *pulls confidence out of the drain* *wrings it out* *hands it to you* :)

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Wow thank you lol :) I like writing characters with confidence to pretend I have confidence myself

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13:10 Mar 26, 2021

I'm starting to pick up a sign that dialogue is one of your strengths. It was so engaging and interesting to read. It flowed nicely. And once again, a lot of the dialogue has no punctuation at the end. Please fix :) I loved this story! Great job :)

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I think dialouge is one of my strengths bc I view narrative as dialogue, tbh. Could you point out a few of the punctuation? Like I am sorry that I am literally clueless and also very stupid, and I really don't want to waste your time, but it'd mean a lot to me bc my dumb brain cannot compute punctuation, lol.

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14:10 Mar 26, 2021

Lol you're not stupid! Here's the dialogue that doesn't end with punctuation. If you want me to fix it for you, all you have to do is ask :) "I don't see the problem" "The knights of Favonious are split. Jean seems to be unconscious, and the plan is to have the abyss order attempt to cross the bridge to take them all out at once. We were going to stalk this camp before night and then take it out. Now the attention will be tracked here. More importantly, they will be attracted to us" "Truly remarkable" "Not place" "That's right" "Abyss will ...

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Ahh... that's a lot. Yes... I was wondering whether I was supposed to put a period... some books I read don't, but others do. I can't promise that I'll fix it on reedsy bc I am a procrastinator, but I will try to break the bad habit over time. I've just never been taught that (English teacher told me 'It doesn't matter' which is umm) Sorry that you had to do this too!

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14:19 Mar 26, 2021

I understand that. I hope you do. Np :)

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I am trying to write the best story I have written next, and I WILL break this bad habit for u :)

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11:40 Mar 26, 2021

#StopDownvotingNow #SupportFellowAuthors Share with ten friends!

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