81 comments

Adventure Fantasy

its been a while since i've last watched avatar the last air bender so if i forget anything or do something wrong then tell me in the comments.

Water. Earth. Fire. Air. The avatar was the only one that could master all four elements. They were able to keep peace, even stopping a few wars (mostly caused by the fire nation.) before they ever fully began.

Though 16 years ago the avatar had disappeared so suddenly and without a trace. Everyone had been on edge, they tried their best to not start something until the Avatar returned. Though the fire nation had other plans.

They started a war again knowing without the avatar being there that they'd be able to win. They all doubted that a new avatar would come, maybe the one from 16 years ago was the final one.

Evie, a 16 year old girl watched in the distance as some fire nation soldiers captured both Earth bender's and Water benders and started putting them into very large trucks or cells.

She decided to try and blend in and act as if she was being captured as well. She wouldn't be able to save all of those people but she'd maybe be able to save one. If she did then maybe she could go back for them all.

She walked over as she stood next to a water-bender who was waiting to be taken away. She must have known that she shouldn't bend or try to run, something could happen to her if she did.

The water-bender seemed to be around the Age of Evie while having short brown hair and light blue eyes. "hey..." evie said to get the girls attention.

"huh...?" the girl turned to look at her, there wasn't a lot of water but there was a drain nearby that was leaking so she was messing with it. in surprise, she jumped back and dropped the water. she had thought Evie was a fire nation soldier at first.

"i'm Evie...what's your name?" she asked with a small smile.

"Ripple." she wasn't really looking at her when she said this. she was paying more attention to the soldiers that continued to take away the earth and water benders nearby.

Evie sighed as she stared back at what was happening and then back at ripple. "come with me." she said in a whisper as some fire nation soldiers were close by.

Ripple was the oldest out of her family that included 2 sisters and 2 brothers, she hadn't seem them for a while and so she assumed they were already captured.

Her mother had died of an illness when she was around 10 and her father didn't care so much. so she had to take care of her siblings if her father didn't. which was 99% of the time.

Ripple looked around and none of them were looking at the two so she followed Evie behind a building. It was just the two of them back there so she felt safe, at least for now.

"alright so what are you doing?" Ripple asked, this girl seemed interesting to her. she's never seen this one before in the town.

"you wanna get out of here right?"

"yes"

"then come with me"

"what about all of those other people though?? we can't just leave them, who knows what will happen??" she wanted to save her siblings to. what if something worse happened to them and she couldn't do something.

"we'll come back i-" the two of them heard loud footsteps and the clanking of armor getting near. "there they are! get them!" one fire nation soldier said and 4 more appeared. they wanted to get everyone.

"COME ON!" Evie grabbed hold of Ripple's hand and started running somewhere as the fire nation soldiers started blasting fire balls at them. Ripple was interesting to her, and she was still someone innocent, she had to get her away from them.

They ran through the town as they still chased after them until the two of them reached a forest. They no longer heard footsteps or shouting from behind them. they were safe, at least for now.

"come on just a bit farther, lets find a cave." Ripple didn't have a choice in the matter as Evie sort of just drags her along through the forest trying to find one. She was glad Evie had saved her though, who knows what would have happened if she didnt.

The two of them managed to find a cave which was quite big and the two of them went in as deep as they could. "thank...you..." Ripple said, almost out of breath from all the running.

Evie decided that they'd both stay in the cave for the night and if they had to, then for the next few days. Since they escaped some fire nation soldiers would probably go searching for them. they wouldn't want to be caught.

Ripple smiled as she gave Evie a hug and she hugged back. "so what were you doing in the town?" Ripple asked.

the two of them began to talk about things, such as what they were doing before it happened or things such as what they like to do for fun. Ripple liked to pass the time by trying to create things from her water-bending though almost nothing was ever created.

"i promise, we'll go back and save those people or maybe even others" Evie then said as she stared out of the cave and at the moon. it wasn't a full moon but it was still so beautiful.

Ripple nodded and then noticed a few light blue things on her arms and hands, though she fully couldn't tell what those were. so naturally she asked "Evie?" and pointed to them.

Evie sighed, she and Ripple would be together for a long time but they were friend's now, she should be able to know. Evie stood up and started doing things with her hands.

"huh...?" ripple watched confused on what her new friend was doing, was she bending?

Evie soon managed to create a small but big enough to see air ball. Ripple gasped a small bit, Evie...was an air-bender! how...??

"That's not all my friend...." Evie said with a small laugh as she took off her gloves and rolled up her sleeves. Revealing light blue arrows that almost seemed to glow a few times.

Ripple hadn't expected this at all, not only was she a air-bender she was...the avatar! the new avatar! why do all of the other avatar's seem to just disappear for a long time and come back years later?

That didn't matter now though, Evie was the avatar and Ripple was a water-bender who was also practicing with blood-bending. Maybe the two of them could actually do something. Together.

This one is probably worse than the others but hey i tried and there may be a part 2 if any of you like this. and a few things, the air nomads are all still alive but are rarely seen instead of just being full on dead. That's why Ripple was still surprised since the last time anyones really seem them was longer than the avatar disappeared. I probably suck with the moves of them and stuff but you can still tell me in the comments about them or what i should do. If she shouldn't be a full born air bender/air nomad maybe i could change it to something else

August 22, 2020 21:30

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81 comments

It's a great story! I never watched Avatar, but after reading I want to watch it :)

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B. W.
18:56 Aug 24, 2020

Thanks kendra ^^ im glad you enjoyed this one. Yeah you really should try to watch it, its an amazing show and i think its on netflix.

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Alright :)

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Oops i accidentally spammed my comment

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B. W.
19:01 Aug 24, 2020

would you maybe want there to be a part 2 to this?

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Sure! If you want to :D

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B. W.
19:03 Aug 24, 2020

a fun fact: ive actually done a story for all the stuff this weeks prompt put up so i have to wait until the new one comes out to make a few more stories, i get a lot of ideas i guess :/

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Doubra Akika
20:39 Aug 25, 2020

Avatar was my favourite cartoon a whileee ago! As a true fan 😂, I’d say you did a pretty great job. I think you should install Grammarly to help with your punctuations. That was the major problem. I would have tried to point them out but I’m using my phone. My favourite character in this is definitely Ripple. She seems really responsible and like she cares for her siblings. Must be difficult having to raise them without their actual parents. I’ll go ahead to read your next story. Really liked this!

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B. W.
20:46 Aug 25, 2020

Thanks i'm glad you enjoyed it, the thing i was mostly worried about was how to describe the bending but i guess i might have done good with it or it was just bad. I still keep forgetting to use Grammarly or another thing but i'll try to use them at some point with my other stories. Ripple and Evie won't be the only characters there will also probably be a earth bender and a Fire bender or it just might be the two of them. I might go deeper into both of Evie's and Ripples backstories since she's the avatar and Ripple doesn't really have her ...

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Doubra Akika
20:56 Aug 25, 2020

Yeah! Grammarly is great! And a backstory would be great! You can let me know when you write the part two. I’d love to read it!

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B. W.
21:02 Aug 25, 2020

The second part and some other things will be out real soon probably so you don't have to wait that long, ill tell ya :)

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Doubra Akika
21:22 Aug 25, 2020

Nice!

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14:23 Sep 29, 2020

I like the Airbender series and you can go a long way with it. The story lines will take off anywhere you want them too. I was distracted by the punctuation and capitalization. If you don't use Grammarly maybe try ProWritingAid. It's another great tool. Otherwise a great story and I encourage you to continue. Robert

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B. W.
14:25 Sep 29, 2020

Yeah, i was going to try and edit this a while ago but now it's to late. I don't use Grammarly so maybe i'll have to try both of them whenever i get the chance for it though ^^ and thanks, i'm glad ya liked it.

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14:38 Sep 29, 2020

I don't know if you use MS word or Google Doc's but I like Google Doc's myself. It saves everything online and you can access it anywhere at anytime. You can always go back and revise a story for corrections and updates. It's all about the steps to improvement. No one wrote a perfect story the first time. Robert

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B. W.
15:01 Sep 29, 2020

Actually before i joined Reedsy i used to kind of make stories on Google docs and show some of my friends, so i think i'll do the google doc thing

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15:10 Sep 29, 2020

If you use the program Prowritingaid it links to your google docs in the background and you can get corrections along the way. It has so many free functions you almost get information overload. Just a plug for the program that's all. Robert

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Itay Frenkel
21:35 Aug 27, 2020

I really enjoyed your story, especially since avatar used to be my favourite show. The characters here were great, you did a good job of creating a backstory and showing the reader how it affected them, especially with Ripple. The dialogue flowed well and was really funny at parts. Way to go!

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B. W.
21:44 Aug 27, 2020

Thank's i'm glad you enjoyed it ^^ there's going to be a part 2 probably tomorrow and it will have more backstory with them and maybe some other characters.

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Itay Frenkel
01:23 Aug 28, 2020

That's great, I look forward to it! I'm off to read your latest story Goddes child pt.1

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B. W.
01:25 Aug 28, 2020

Yep ^^ and great i'm excited to see what ya have to say for that one as well :)

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Itay Frenkel
01:30 Aug 28, 2020

Just finished leaving feedback on your other story, once again, a fantastic job!

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B. W.
01:31 Aug 28, 2020

Thanks ^^

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R. E. Dressler
22:51 Aug 25, 2020

I enjoyed this! I haven't seen avatar so this story actually enlightened me. You did a good job at laying down characterization and giving backstories. I look forward to part 2! The only suggestion I have is to maybe proofread so that you don't miss out on some of the grammatical mistakes (like capitalizations). Other than that, keep up the great work!

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B. W.
23:04 Aug 25, 2020

Part 2 will have more stuff with this like showing flashbacks for their backstories. There may also be two other characters to join them or it will stay as just Evie and Ripple the entire time. I'm glad you enjoyed this ^^ in my other stories i think i'll try to use Grammarly or something else.

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Maya W.
16:21 Aug 24, 2020

Hey, I love Avatar! I'm kinda obsessed, lol. You have few grammar mistakes in this story, but it was pretty great in general! Would you mind checking out some of my stories? Thanks!

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B. W.
16:32 Aug 24, 2020

I'm glad you like the show and this! ^^ i recently started watching avatar on netflix again for this. Yeah i get that and i'll try to do better with my Grammar. Sure i can check out one of your stories and did you maybe have a favorite part or character?

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Amany Sayed
19:17 Aug 23, 2020

Great story! I have not seen Avatar so it was a bit confusing, but it was enjoyable nonetheless. It could use a bit of touching up with grammar, but the idea was interesting. Can't wait for Part 2!

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B. W.
19:42 Aug 23, 2020

thank you i'm glad you enjoyed it. Some of the things like my two main characters (obviously) were my own characters and never in the show. I haven't watched it in a while either but i still managed to remember most of the stuff. In my next stories i'll also try to do better with Grammar. And if your confused about a few things in the story, why don't you maybe tell me and i can try to tell you about it. and would you have maybe had a favorite character or favorite part?

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Amany Sayed
19:46 Aug 23, 2020

Yeah, I figured. Like what all the powers are and how different people are born with different powers. And what an avatar is in general. And pretty much the whole backbone of the story and sort of beginning part. A lot of my friends tell me to watch the show, so if I ever do, I'll come back and reread this. My favorite character was Ripple. My favorite part was probably the whole of them escaping and then the way they were suddenly friends, it fit the prompt very well.

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B. W.
19:56 Aug 23, 2020

I mean the show's up on netflix so you could go and watch it if you have it. But i'll still you most of the thing's for it if you wont, but not the full on plot from the show. "water-bender's" are people born in what i think is called the water tribe, there's several of those. They have to be near water though to bend it so some may carry something with water. "earth-bender's" are people who can bend kinda like the ground i don't really know how to explain it. they live in what i think is called "earth kingdom" and so on "fire bender's" are ...

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Amany Sayed
20:28 Aug 23, 2020

Yeah, thanks that clears it up a bit. I might watch it soon.

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B. W.
20:29 Aug 23, 2020

no problem i think you'd like it if you do

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01:43 Aug 23, 2020

Hey, B.! You asked me to read this story, so here I am. This was a good storyline, and your characters were believable. I have some advice, though: 1.) You could have been more descriptive. 2.) There were grammatical and punctuation errors throughout the entire story, making it hard to read. I would recommend downloading Grammarly if it is available to you; it helps a lot with that kind of thing. Other than that, I loved this story. And the names! Keep writing and stay healthy, Brooke

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B. W.
01:55 Aug 23, 2020

Thank you i'm glad you liked it at least. i was having some trouble with this one but i'll try to be more descriptive in the other ones i make. Yeah i know with all the error's in it and ill try to start using grammarly or something else like that if i remember. If you do (im pretty sure you wont cuz this is terrible) would you maybe have a favorite character of it and a favorite part?

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01:57 Aug 23, 2020

You're welcome! I totally understand where you were struggling slightly. This story is NOT terrible! I actually really enjoyed it. My favorite character would be Ripple, and my favorite part is when Evie revealed to Ripple that she was the new avatar.

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B. W.
02:01 Aug 23, 2020

Thank you still, i haven't seen avatar in a long time so i was trying to remember some things because i didn't want to get anything wrong. (like the things the air nomads and others can do with their bending and stuff) would you maybe want there to be a part 2 for this and any ideas for that?

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02:06 Aug 23, 2020

It's my pleasure. I have personally never seen Avatar, so if you got anything wrong factually, it didn't bother me at all. I would definitely want a part two, and I would just suggest working on how the world around the characters feels, and how the characters themselves feel.

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B. W.
02:09 Aug 23, 2020

Alright i'll try to work on that then with the next part. You should watch the show i think its been put on netflix. It has 3 seasons and each are really well, i think you'd possibly like it :)

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Adah M.M
20:11 Aug 28, 2020

Amazing story !! Avatar is one of my absolute favorites.

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B. W.
20:14 Aug 28, 2020

Thank's im glad you enjoyed it ^^ if you still wanna check out some of my other stories why not check out "The Camp" its my most recent one and i'd love to see what you have to say

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Jewels 🌊🐅
16:00 Aug 27, 2020

I love this story, 10/10 And I agree with Doubra on Grammarly, That's what I do, (Even though I ignore the help sometimes XD) Great Story. -Juliette

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B. W.
16:02 Aug 27, 2020

Thank's i'm glad you liked this ^^ yeah i know that i still gotta use Grammarly or something like that but i keep forgetting to do ill try to do it with my other ones though. Did you maybe have a favorite character out of the two or a favorite part?

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Jewels 🌊🐅
16:09 Aug 27, 2020

I really like the conversation between Evie and Ripple. Amazing. Pure Humor.

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B. W.
16:16 Aug 27, 2020

I think by tomorrow i'll already have a few more stories out along with a part 2 for this ^^ would you be wanting to read it?

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Jewels 🌊🐅
16:52 Aug 30, 2020

Um.... YA!!

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B. W.
16:55 Aug 30, 2020

so a part 2 for this is actually out i made it yesterday i think "Avatar's past" is the name of the story if ya wanna go check it out and say something about it

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Blake Hogen
23:11 Aug 26, 2020

Even though this story was within the Avatar universe, it was its own unique story, and the characterization was very well done.

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B. W.
23:14 Aug 26, 2020

Thanks i'm glad you enjoyed it ^^ did you maybe have a favorite part to the story or a favorite character out of the two so far?

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Whitney Trang
16:24 Aug 26, 2020

I liked this story! It's interesting to see what's going on in this world before events of the show began. Looking forward to read more about Evie and Ripple.

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B. W.
16:48 Aug 26, 2020

I'm glad you enjoyed it. though im not so sure about the time, i'm not sure if it would be before the show or just in something else completely different. The second part will definitely have more stuff about the two's past, did you maybe have a favorite part?

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Whitney Trang
22:38 Aug 26, 2020

When Evie revealed herself to be the avatar! I wasn't expecting that. Looking forward to learning more about these two's backstories.

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B. W.
22:47 Aug 26, 2020

I think part 2 mostly might be flashbacks or something for their backstories unless i can get a different idea for it

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Shreya S
03:16 Aug 26, 2020

Great story! I’m a fan of the avatar series (even though I haven’t seen or read anything lmao) so this was a fun read :)

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B. W.
03:19 Aug 26, 2020

Thank's im glad you enjoyed this one. though it isn't that good to me tbh (my story, not the show, the show is great) "goddess child" is better than this one, you should check out that one

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Lizzie Brown
19:42 Aug 25, 2020

Hi, it's been a while since I watched Avatar as well, but I recalled some of it while reading this. I think it's in the fantasy genre. I'm not an expert on fantasy but I think this is an interesting story.

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B. W.
19:50 Aug 25, 2020

Yeah i only recently started watching it again right before i started making this. But i'm glad you still liked this story, if you could (if you havent) could you also check out "Goddess child" i'd like to see what you think about that one as well. not sure if you read it already or not

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Jorja Orne
22:25 Aug 24, 2020

Loved this! Though I had never watched avatar before, you have certainly intrigued me :-)

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B. W.
22:29 Aug 24, 2020

Thanks im glad you liked this at least. Avatar is on Netflix so if you wanted to, you could go and watch it. But do you maybe have any questions about it? (the show or my story either one i can answer them) maybe that could help ya understand a bit more

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Jorja Orne
00:15 Aug 25, 2020

Certainly, what is this show about?

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B. W.
00:21 Aug 25, 2020

Okay so there is four nations: the water tribe, the earth kingdom,the fire nation and the air nomads. the bender's are able to control and manipulate the element from their nation, though there are people who can't bend at all. The fire nation is kinda evil cuz they've started a war. The avatar is the only one who would be able to stop this and some other things as they would be strong enough to stop it and since they are able to learn all the elements. The main character in the show (along with my main character evie) is the avatar though i...

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Jorja Orne
00:25 Aug 25, 2020

Totally understand. Sound's like a supernatural related show, or kind of alike! I love shows about supernatural things like vampires, werewolves. That kind of stuff really intrigues me. Some show's aren't entirely realistic, but what shows are (along with books). I will totally watch Avatar.

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B. W.
00:29 Aug 25, 2020

Alright glad to hear ^^ you'll probably like it. when you DO watch it, the intro to the show will probably help you understand it a bit more than what i said.

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20:39 Aug 23, 2020

Hey, awesome Avatar fanfic! I enjoyed this story and definitely liked the characters ;) Keep writing!

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B. W.
20:44 Aug 23, 2020

Thank's im glad you enjoyed it ill try to make a part two when the next prompt comes out along with another part to "we know, do you know?" at some point since i still plan to. I guess these two little things im doing are almost kinda like your jax series in a small way. Did you maybe have a favorite part to the story along with a favorite character out of the two of them so far? there'll be more like in the show since we have a water bender i'll probably add a earth and fire bender.

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Avery G.
02:24 Aug 23, 2020

Hi! This was cool! I liked how you added Avatar to this! I haven't watched it, but this was good! My favorite part was the ending! Great job!

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B. W.
02:28 Aug 23, 2020

thanks im glad you liked this, you should try to watch Avatar if you want to. im pretty sure they put it on netflix. Did you maybe have a favorite character as well out of the two or what did you just think of them?

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Avery G.
03:11 Aug 23, 2020

I liked Evie! She has cool powers! Also, I really like her name!

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B. W.
03:51 Aug 23, 2020

Would you maybe want there to be a part 2 to this? and if so do you have any ideas with it?

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Avery G.
04:00 Aug 23, 2020

Sure! Maybe tell how her powers evolved?

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B. W.
04:03 Aug 23, 2020

What do you mean by that? do you mean by how she's able to do all 4 elements?

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