142 comments

Thriller

Hey there. My name is Rosalie Parks. I was always an ordinary girl. I read books, watched television, went to school, got bullied, wrote stories, etc. I was always one of those people who wanted to be famous. I wanted everyone to know me and scream my name and if you can believe it, it became true. You know except for the fact that I'm living that dream from a dead girl's life.


Whoa, right?


Let me lead you to the moments my life had changed - forever.


"Hey look everyone, it's Rosalie." One idiot says.


"She looks so pretty." A bimbo adds.


"She's so great." Another says.


"I love your outfit!" Someone calls out.


Cheers fill the room as Rosalie walks by.


Now, this is may make me seem like I'm the most popular girl ever. It makes it look like I'm glamorous and that everyone adores me but unfortunately, it couldn't be further from the truth. The fantasy was nice while it lasted though.


This is what really happened.


"Hey look everyone, it's that weird freak, Rosalie." The idiot says.


"She's so ugly." The bimbo adds.


"She's so.... eww." Another says in disgust.


"What the hell is she wearing?" Someone calls out.


What everyone is actually doing is throwing things at me as I walk by.


Now, this was more like it. My life in a nutshell people. I'd wallow in self-pity right about now but today, I'm numb. High school will do that to you.


After people continue throwing hurtful words and garbage at me, I take my leave for the day and go to my favorite bridge. It has the most amazing view. Dark blue waves, doves swaying and flying by. No cars. No people. Just peace.


However, today was different. When I got there, I saw a woman standing on the ledge, contemplating whether or not she wanted to jump. I, of course, rushed over to stop her.


“Hey lady! What the hell are you doing? You’re going to fall down from there!”


“That’s the point! I have nothing to live for, so go on your way and leave me alone.”


“Hey, Wait! I recognize you! Your Viviane Green! The famous Movie Star.”


“In the flesh.”


“What could ever make you want to end your life? You have everything. Fame, fans, and money.”


“Yes, but the real question is, is it even worth it? Everyone and everything is fake. This lifestyle is made to tear everyone down. They feed off of that. But they won’t get me. I won’t let them.”


“Who is they?”


“Everyone.”


“But you can’t leave, Viviane you have people depending on you. I’m depending on you. I aspire to be just like you.”


“Is that so? Ok, then that’s what you’ll be.”


“I’m not following.”


“Be me. I don’t know if you’ve looked in a mirror lately, but your resemblance to me is striking. There is a car waiting for me down that road. They’ll start looking for me soon, so get in that car, and be me.”


Before I could say anymore, she jumped over the bridge. I was baffled and froze. This was freaking insane. I couldn’t just up and be someone else. That’s crazy. What about my own life? Wouldn’t people miss me? Who am I kidding? Nobody would even notice if I disappeared. I have no friends and my foster parents ignore me. So maybe I should do this. Be somebody. I’ll finally have my dream. Thank you, Viviane.


Without thinking on the topic anymore, I walked over to the car and got in. Goodbye Rosalie. Hello Viviane.



Months after, I was invested in Viviane’s lifestyle. The lights, the camera, the fans, interviews, and God so much more. People loved me so much. No one ever suspected a thing. I was everything I had ever wanted to be but then, the guilt started to build up. The real Viviane was dead. Would anyone find out? What would happen to me? What am I saying? These people are too stupid to even know the difference.


Today, I’m making a debut of the red carpet. The millionth for Viviane, but the first for me.


“Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhh omg, its Viviane!”


It feels so good to have people cheering for you in a way that makes you feel good, not ashamed. Like what I was usually used to.


“Viviane! We love you!”


My, this is so magical. This is amazing. The way this is going, I’d be crazy to ever have another problem. I could get used to this.


“Is it me or does Viviane look different?


Yes, I’m – wait what?! I quickly turn and look at two teen girls with suspicious looks on their faces huddled over to one side, whispering, and looking at me. Just like in school. Rosalie would just walk on with her head low, but Viviane wouldn’t. She’d face them with her head held high. And with that, I pointed back and raised my voice at them.


“Hey, you two!”


They both abruptly turn to look at me.

“I don’t know who you two think you are, but I am Viviane Green.”


“Viviane wouldn’t yell at her fans.” One of them says.


“I’m not yelling at you.”


I lean in when I say the next part.


“I’m simply letting you know that if you mess with me, you’re going to get burned. Nobody is going to take this from me especially two ordinary wastes like you. Trust me you don’t want to mess with me.”


I lift up my head and smile like I hadn’t just threatened them and walk away, pleased with myself.


The night consists of partying, mingling, drinking, and laughing. This is exactly like what I imagined it be. This is where I have always belonged. After the movie premiere party is over, I head to Viviane’s mansion which is might I tell you, magnificent. I feel like a queen when I enter.


I walk into the bathroom and face the mirror and smile. But on the other side of the mirror, the face that looks back is Viviane. The real one that is. She, however, isn’t smiling. She actually looks rather sad and begins to speak.


“How could you do this to me? I thought you were my fan. How could you kill someone you admire?”


“I didn’t kill you. You jumped, remember?”


“You’re insane.”

“No, I’m famous.”


I smile and dose away, thinking about our encounter at the bridge, aka the best day of my life.



Viviane stood on the bridge’s ledge looking out at the river smiling. This startled me as I walked over because I assumed, she was trying to jump.


“Hey! What the hell are you doing! You’re going to fall down from there!”


“Oh, hi darling, don’t worry I always do this. I grew up here. Sometimes I come over to stare out at the view, it’s a great way to have time to myself when fans and cameras aren’t chasing me around.”


“What do you- OMG! You’re Viviane Green!”


“In the flesh.”


“I’m Rosalie, your biggest fan! I love you so much!”


She smiles.


“Nice to meet you, Rosalie, it’s always nice to see another fan.”


I smile at her and join her on the ledge.


“Hey, did anyone ever tell you how much you looked like me? Our resemblance is striking.”


I smile wide.



“No, I don’t really have anyone close to telling me that. The only thing people say is that I look is ugly.”


“That’s terrible, well for what it’s worth, I think you’re beautiful, especially if you have a face that looks like mine. I mean that in the most unvain way possible.”


“Thanks, that means a lot coming from you. I hate this town so much. Nobody understands me. I want to leave this town and be just like you.”


“Listen, honey, fame isn’t all that you see. It’s a lot of work and it comes with a lot of emotional baggage. If you aren’t prepared for it, then this business will eat you alive.”


I don’t know what it was but at that moment, I snapped at her. My own idol didn’t even believe in me.


“Are you saying I’m not cut out for it? Is that what you're implying Viviane! I was made for this life!”


“Calm down darling I’m not saying your no-


“Don’t fucking tell me to calm down! Nobody believes in me and I’m tired of it! Why can’t anyone just be happy for me! Nobody cares about me! I have no friends, both of my real parents are dead, and I’m alone! Why would you deliberately try to drain my hope! I HATE YOU!!”


Viviane started to look visibly worried and tried to turn around, but I stopped her.

“You know what, you are right.”


Viviane still looks startled but answers.


“Right about what?”


I smile at her, making sure to never look away.


“We do look alike, don’t we. If I were you, nobody would ever notice.”


“Yes, I suppose that would be true.”


“Then I guess I’ll do it.”


“Do what?”


“Be you.”


A look of horror spreads across Viviane’s face but before she can react, I push her over the bridge, where all that is left to be heard are the screams that escape her mouth. But then abruptly, they stop. Then I’m brought back to reality, staring back at Viviane’s solemn face.


“Thank you, Viviane. For giving me this to gift. You’ve given me a second chance. That day, I was going to jump over that bridge, but there you were, waiting for me, like an angel.”


“I never asked you to take my life! You have a mental problem, Rosalie! What makes you think people won’t find out?!”


“They won’t. They’ll be those who try but don’t succeed. It’s my turn to be happy now. I’ll kill more if I have to. And nobody can stop me.”


“Please don’t do this.”


“I can’t stop what’s already been done. I’m bored with you now. Goodbye Viviane.”


With that, I leave the bathroom, shut the door, and lay on my bed.


I was brought the chance of a lifetime and I took the opportunity. You can call me crazy, but I knew what I had to do.


Now the question is, would you?

September 01, 2020 03:33

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

142 comments

Hriday Saboo
10:46 Sep 01, 2020

Thank ya for following me

Reply

your welcome

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Hriday Saboo
10:40 Sep 01, 2020

Hey brilliant melony. Very beautifully written Would you mind following me

Reply

No problem man just did. Thanks for reading.

Reply

Hriday Saboo
10:46 Sep 01, 2020

Welcome and thanks

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
~💖 YW
18:31 Sep 16, 2020

Woah. Just woah. That went from 1 to 100 like really fast. I really like this like I can't even explain. You did such a great job!! I love it! 💖

Reply

Thank you!!!! It makes me so happy that people like this story, I worked real hard. (:

Reply

~💖 YW
18:39 Sep 16, 2020

Yw! You did AMAZING!! Keep the awesome job up! I especially loved the dark turn :D

Reply

Aww shucks. (: Thank you, dark turns are my specialty.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Ru .
03:40 Sep 14, 2020

Hey Melony, This story had me gripping my armrests and sitting precariously on the edge of my seat. I loved how you portrayed the dark side of fame and the difference in life off-camera — that glamour and beauty can be a real pain. But what really had me going was Rosalie's warped perceptions and how she twisted her thoughts to justify herself and look innocent. Chilling and wonderful — you've got some real talent, girl!

Reply

Thank you so much! I've always wanted to write about a character with a psychological problem, there are many stories about things like this happening in the past. It was fun making a story of my own about it.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Lory Grace
21:20 Sep 17, 2020

The way you play with what is Rosalie's fantasies and what is actually happening--amazing! You hinted at her mental instability just enough that when the twist came, it was believable. Great job, and keep writing!

Reply

Thank you so much for reading, im so glad you enjoyed it!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
B. W.
17:29 Sep 16, 2020

Hey i really liked this and you did great with it ^^ 10/10

Reply

Hey B.W.! Thanks, I really appreciate that. Did you ever figure out what names you were gonna use?

Reply

B. W.
17:36 Sep 16, 2020

Hm? sorry i think i forgot but, what names i'm going to use for what?

Reply

Lol. You had asked me for names for a story.

Reply

B. W.
18:08 Sep 16, 2020

I think i might know which your talking about but it will be an actual novel now, could i tell you the plot for it?

Reply

Congrats on that, and of course

Reply

Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
XANDER DMER
21:20 Jan 21, 2021

Hey Melony! I Like your stories... Keep writing :) Check Me Out - https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/xander-dmer/ I posted a new story today :-]

Reply

Show 0 replies
Emma Lin
23:52 Sep 20, 2020

Hey Melony! I really apologize for not commenting on your story earlier. I have been going through a lot of personal stuff! But I am here and ready to comment :) I liked how you incorporated the twists in your story and beautifully captured the darkness in the MC which is relatable to all of us--the desire to be wanted, admired, and respected and the lengths that we go through to obtain those desires. Thank you for commenting and liking my story! Have a wonderful day! ~Emma

Reply

Hey Emma! You don't have to apologize, that fact that you read and felt the need to comment means a lot so I appreciate that! I'm sorry that you're going through some stuff, cause honestly, I understand, I'm going through some things myself! But I hope you are able to get through it. I appreciate each and every person who likes and comments on my stories, it makes me feel special that my story has caught your eye. (; Your welcome! It was my pleasure. May all your days be bright, bye!

Reply

Emma Lin
23:15 Sep 22, 2020

Thank you so much Melony <3

Reply

Your welcome!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
13:32 Sep 18, 2020

Hi Melony , I loved that story!!!!

Reply

Heyyy Nimrit!, Thanks for reading!

Reply

15:26 Sep 18, 2020

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
The Cold Ice
07:55 Sep 14, 2020

Brilliant story.I like this story.Great job keep it up.It is a wonderful story. Would you mind to read my story “The dragon warrior part 2?”

Reply

No problem, thanks for reading.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Anshika Goyal
17:49 Sep 12, 2020

I really liked this story, it is well-written, and you take the definition of show don't tell seriously. It is a perfect combination of actions, descriptions, and dialogues. Keep Writing!! P.s. Would you mind checking out two of the recent stories?

Reply

Thank you so much! I'd be honored to read your stories.

Reply

Anshika Goyal
09:27 Sep 13, 2020

No problem and thanks hehe.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Andrew Krey
02:01 Sep 12, 2020

Hi Melony, great story - I love an unreliable narrator and you pull it off well. If when you switch reality early in the story, the way the details unfold still build up to the twist and it hits hard. An unhinged protagonist shouldn't be telling their story in a straight forward kind of way! I also liked how at the beginning it felt like the story was being told directly to you, then less so as she becomes famous. It felt to me like as fame sucked her in, she even had less time for narration lol

Reply

Lol, yeah, you may be right. This story is a personal favorite for me, I had waiting for the right moment to write an unstable character and this prompt worked well with it, especially since it is something that really happens.

Reply

Andrew Krey
02:59 Sep 12, 2020

Those are the best when you have an existing idea you've been playing around with, then a prompt fits perfectly. If you're enjoying what you write I always find you have to edit it less!

Reply

Dude that's so true. When I was writing this, there was like two things I had to fix after that made me feel so good. I love writing in general so much.

Reply

Andrew Krey
09:35 Sep 12, 2020

That love shows!

Reply

:)

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Velma Darnell
20:36 Sep 03, 2020

Wow, that's such a powerful and captivating story, Melony! I loved the plot and how it was enfolding, giving real details on the case. It was an interesting decision of yours to tell the story in this way, giving both points of the view, and, I think, that's what made it so thrilling. It's really well-thought and made me want to find out what happens next. Also, I think the title fits perfectly. I'm so glad I read it, keep writing :)

Reply

Thank you so much, Velma! I'm so happy that you enjoyed it. I kept getting so much writer's block when I was writing.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Taylor Pastore
03:31 Sep 03, 2020

Wow, I love the plot twist!! I love stories with two different narratives as the reader tries to distinguish between what is reality and what is the perception of the narrator. Very intriguing.

Reply

Thank you so much for reading!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Estelle Westley
12:53 Sep 02, 2020

My kind of story. Loved the twist.

Reply

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Kristin Neubauer
19:30 Sep 01, 2020

Wow, Melony - that is a heck of story! Very creative, very chilling. I thought your writing was excellent, I just rolled right along with it. I was not prepared for Rosalie to actually kill Vivienne and thought you revealed that beautifully. Well done!

Reply

Thank you so much for reading Kristin! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
A. S.
18:05 Sep 01, 2020

Great job! The only thing I would’ve changed would be to give a little more insight to the main characters everyday life to demonstrate how big of a contrast her new life is.

Reply

I see what mean, thank you a bunch for reading!

Reply

A. S.
23:08 Sep 01, 2020

You’re welcome!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
India Moon
09:37 Sep 01, 2020

This is deliciously dark. Well done! I love the contrast between what Rosalie tells herself happened (suicide) and what actually happened (murder). I also liked the obvious differences in Viviane's speech pattern. When she's "suicidal"— it's all teenage angst– much like Rosalie's own voice. And in the actual scene, Viviane is a different person entirely. The story itself is fantastic, I wouldn't change the thing. I would work on editing the language a bit more, to make it punchier, with fewer words. For example, instead of "Whenever ...

Reply

India, thank you so much for your detailed comment, I'll definitely go change a few things around. I really appreciate that you took the time to not only read but, help me better the story. That's very awesome of you.

Reply

India Moon
09:55 Sep 01, 2020

Absolutely my pleasure! And I expect the same from you! As you mentioned in your author bio, the only way to get better (other than to keep on writing) is to get constructive criticism.

Reply

:)

Reply

What do you think of the title, do you think that's good or should I change it? I was pretty stuck on that.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
. .
05:19 Sep 01, 2020

Wow, this was such a good story! Super creative and I loved the word choice too

Reply

Thank you so much, Sarah!

Reply

. .
05:24 Sep 01, 2020

Np

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply

Hey fellow writers! I wasn't going to write this story but it just popped up in my head so I had to write it! If there are any grammar errors, feel free to tell me, I'll admit I did rush a bit. I also could've put more love into it but hey, I did what I could. Also, tell me what you think about the title, I'm usually good with them but I was stuck with this one. Anyways, please read, like, comment, and enjoy!

Reply

. .
05:19 Sep 01, 2020

Wait- you rushed through this and yet it was that good! talent right there

Reply

Aww your too kind, thanks a bunch!

Reply

Skyler Grey
15:33 Sep 09, 2020

seriously, what the heck. i have to write/edit/edit some more for hours for a story to come out well, and even then it's a train wreck, how on earth do you do this? raw talent miss, you're made for this writing thing.

Reply

THANKS SO MUCH!!!! Trust me I edit for hours too. And if someone points out more I edit again. I'll get this idea and my head and when its there it never leaves till I write it. Writing will be something I'm passionate about forever. And when people enjoy your pieces, it makes me feel good because it shows that this was really meant for me. You are an awesome writer too, never forget that we writers have to stick together. ;)

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
RBE | Illustration — We made a writing app for you | 2023-02

We made a writing app for you

Yes, you! Write. Format. Export for ebook and print. 100% free, always.