***
โNo fair, Alina got the last cookie!โ
โBen, sometimes in life you can't have everything,โ Alina said and chowed down on a chocolate chip cookie.
Gooey, decadent chocolate streamed out of the cookie, like silk ribbons. The cookie looked soft and buttery, crumbs spilling out underneath.
Alina gobbled it right up.
Alina patted me on the back, and said, โYou can always make more cookies, yโknow. Itโs not like that was the last cookie in the world.โ
โWhat if it was?โ I asked.ย
โI wouldโve still eaten it,โ she said and raced up the stairs.
โCatch me if you can!โ
Our house was...cool. It wasnโt a normal house that a third-grader would live in. Everything was antique, which translated to that I wasnโt allowed to play with anything, unless it was on a computer or drawing.
Not that I was complaining.
Basically, when you entered, there would be a place to put your shoes. Past that, it split into 3 pathways; the staircase, the kitchen/dining room, and the living room. The staircase was a wooden swirly one, that wrapped around the pole in the middle of it. The kitchen was quite fancy. Almost everything was made of black marble, except for the oven, fridge, toaster and sink.ย
They were all made of boring steel.
The dining room looked like it belonged in a 17th-century room. All the chairs had swirly decorations on them and were painted in silver. A giant chandelier with crystal embellishments adorned the lights, and the hanger was made out of gold.
Real gold, I didnโt know.
The living room looked like where a British tea party would take place. There was a tiny little pink table, where little teacups made of china would sit there, with no tea in them at all.ย
How sad.
Three couches surrounded the table, each one meter long. The cloth was a light beige, with maroon flowers plastered everywhere.ย
How ugly, isnโt it? Grandma probably designed the decor, it was just so...old.
I raced up the staircase, just at the heels of Alina.ย
Being the younger brother always means Iโm behind, below, second.
Alina makes it better, though.
โHa, I beat you again,โ Alina panted, pausing for breath in between her words.ย
โIโll beat you next time,โ I responded.
โHa, like thatโs ever gonna happen. Follow me, I wanna show you something,โ she said and waved me into her room.
This was unusual, Alina never let anyone inside her room, not even Mom.
Which meant this was a special offer.
โWhat do you want to show me?โ
โI made a fantabulous plan.โ
โFor what?โ
โReally Ben, you are oblivious to everything,โ Alina said, sat down and pulled out a drawer.
โWhat does oblivious mean?โ I asked, and sat down next to her.
โUgh, never mind. The plan I made was for our new treehouse!โ
โWeโre getting a treehouse?โ
โYep! Itโs for my birthday next week, and Mom and Dad are letting us build it!โ Alina said, spreading out a blueprint out on her bed.ย
Why Mom and Dad gave the treehouse to Alina instead of me, I will never know, but the blueprint looked pretty interesting.
โHow do we build it?โ I asked and looked over her shoulder to examine the plan.
โSo basically we use these oak boards and then this glue and we put it in an octagonal formation andโฆโ Alina droned off, explaining how to build that treehouse in the most complicated way possible.
Only Albert Einstein couldโve made it more complicated.
Wowee, my sister was a math nerd, so look how that fits.
โDoes Mom and Dad know that you have a blueprint?โ I asked, curious.
โUm...no.โ
โHow did they expect us to build it?โ I asked, now confused.ย
โI donโt know, I think they wanted us to get a guide instead of me making one,โ Alina replied and stretched out her legs.
โDonโt we need wood?โ
โYeah, weโre gonna get it from the basement.โ
โWhen can we start?โ I asked, anxious to start building.ย
โNow! Race ya to the basement!โ Alina shouted and suddenly jumped off the bed and ran out of the room.
I sprang up from the bed and raced after Alina, sprinting downstairs and almost crashed into 3 tables.
My breath was steady, consistent and quick.
I passed Alina.
This sounds really lame, but that was my first time ever getting in front of Alina.
โNo,โ Alina panted, as little as 10 centimetres behind me.
โYes!โ I responded, two steps away from the basement.
Thumping down the stairs, I flicked on the light a second before Alinaโs feet touched the ground.
โI won.โ
โThat doesnโt count, you were just lucky,โ Alina said, sucking in her breath with tiredness.
โYou always say that,โ I said as I looked around.
It was...messy.
Saying that was weird because my whole house was orderly and organized, so the basement was a horror.
There were boxes everywhere, things spilling out of them with thick coats of dust layered on top. Stocks of food piled on top of shelves, with honey and marinara sauce that looked well past its expiration date. Pictures of Mom and Dad in their teens stared down at us expectingly, waiting for us to do something.
That was creepy.
โLook, these are some wood planks we can use. Can you take them to the backyard?โ Alina asked, pointing to a pile of wood on the floor.
โFine.โ
Alina always gave the hard work to me.
Humphย
I scooped up the wood, the edges threatening to give me splinters. I hauled them up the staircase, across the house, and even managed to open the back door.ย
A monarch butterfly perched on one of the branches, fluttering its orange wings.
Momโs voice called out, โAlina, Ben, dinnerโs ready!โ
The butterflyโs wings flapped about, and it flew into the sky, disappearing into the clouds.
โOkay, coming!โ
I ran inside, slamming into my seat at the dinner table.
โWoah kiddo, hereโs your food,โ Mom said and placed a plate of roast chicken under my face.
I started gobbling it up right away, not caring about manners at all.
โWhat were you doing earlier?โ Mom asked, aiming the question at Alina.
I stared at Alina intently, reminding her to not give away the secret.
โUm...I have a blueprint,โ Alina stuttered out, giving me a forgiving face.
Alina could just not keep a secret, for the life of her.
โOh okay, great job,โ said Dad, and started talking about work-related things.
I bent down to Alina and whispered, โWhy did you tell them?โ
โI just canโt lie Ben, you know that,โ she whispered back to me under the table.
โYeah, just tomorrow let me do the talking.โ
โOk.โ
We sat back up, backs straight, and ate dinner.
~
The next day, at exactly 3:27 pm, I burst into Alinaโs room with my hands flailing over my head.
โBOO!โ I shouted and looked at Alina.
She was sitting in front of a computer, and the camera light was red, which meant it was recording something.
โUgh, I was recording my Student Council speech, and now Iโll have to do it all over again. You didnโt even ask to come in, โAlina groaned and closed her computer.
โSorry, itโs just I wanted to start building the treehouse today. If youโre done school work,โ I asked very politely.
โYeah, okay, letโs go to the basement to get some supplies.โ
โRace?โ
โNo, Iโm tired today,โ Alina responded, and walked out of the room.
โOkay,โ I said with disappointment, as I followed her downstairs and into the basement.
Flick
As light flooded the room, Alina said, โIโll get the glue, and you can get the tools.โ
I nodded my head and walked to the back of the basement.ย
I picked up a screwdriver, a hammer, some nails, and when I reached over to grab a wrench, I saw something unusual.
A ball, sticking out of the wall.
Golden, but rusty, kinda like Grandmaโs doorknob, with little fingerprints printed everywhere.
โAlina, I found something weird over here,โ I called, urging her to come.
โWhat did you find?โ she asked, crouching down to take a better look.
โThis thing that looks like a doorknob is coming out of the wall.โ
โHmm, maybe the people that lived here before us forgot to demolish it,โ Alina said, got up and walked away like it was nothing.ย
I stood up, keeping my view on the doorknob. I backed away slowly until I reached the basement stairs, and I ran up them. At the top, I paused for a few seconds and listened.
Nothing.
I ran outside with the tools in my hands, realizing I was afraid of the doorknob.
I didnโt know why.
~
The next day at dinner, Mom asked us again, โHow was your day?โ
I shot a look at Alina, signalling to her to not talk about anything.
โUm, I did some of my science project today.โ
Yes, go Alina.
โOh, youโve been doing those for a while, havenโt you?โ Dad asked, slurping up his noodles noisily.
โYeah,โ Alina said, staring down at her spaghetti, looking like she thought spaghetti was revolting.
โAnything else?โ Mom asked, as if prompting Alina to tell about the doorknob.
โ...wefoundarandomdoorknobinthemiddleofthewall,โ Alina spat out in a single breath and stuffed her face full of spaghetti so she wouldnโt have to answer any questions.
โCould you repeat that sweetie?โ Mom asked, her face curdling with worry.
โUh, at school we started a new project on worms!โ I piped up, sparing Alina the trouble of talking about what had happened in the basement.
โOh really? When I was your age, I used to love worms,โ Dad said, smiling.
โMay I go to the bathroom?โ Alina asked dramatically, her mouth bulging as if something was gonna fall out.
โYe-โ
Alina rushed off to the bathroom before Mom could finish, and we all heard an unpleasant sound of retching and forced breathing.
I donโt even know if she threw up from the worms, spaghetti or the doorknob.
Mightโve been all three.
~
After dinner was done and Alinaโs throat was nice and clean, I gathered up the courage to ask her something she most likely would say no to.
โCan we go back in the basement?โ
Alina looked down at her feet, sighing.
โ...โ
โFine.โ
I was shocked. Alina proved my theory at dinner that she too was scared of the doorknob, but now she was saying yes andโฆ
Alina started walking to the basement, not saying a word.
I followed her, not wanting to miss this chance.
Once we were in the basement, Alinaโs jaw dropped and pointed at the wall.
I followed her finger, and what I found was terrifying.
Where the doorknob was, there was a door.
A real-life door, with black smoke spilling out of the edges, moaning sounds flowing from that creepy door.
โW-whaโฆโ
Alina backed up moving away slowly like I had the day before, but I was curious, so I stepped closer.
โWhat in the world are you doing?โ Alina whispered.
I put my hand up, asking her to be silent.
โ...โ
I crept closer, trying to cautious of what or who mightโve been in there. The doorknob glistened, much shinier than it had been yesterday. My reflection looked back at me, watching. The door itself was kinda boring, to be honest. It was a dark brown, like most doors, and...that was it.ย
The smoke is what was interesting.
It curled out of the door, flowing out a little bit like dry ice would. The black was hard to see in the basement shadows, but you could tell it was there. It was wispy, like thoughts, like decisions, like Alinaโs voice.ย
It was...mesmerizing.
Open the door, Ben. Such nice things are hidden inside. Do you like ice cream? Thereโs a freezer of ice cream inside.ย
My internal voice was screaming NO!
My brain said Yes.
My hand reached out, shivering from the lack of heat in the basement. My hand closed around the ice-cold doorknob, glistening with polish.
Click
It opened.
Alina, come here
A wispy figure stepped out that was made out of black smoke, the same that was spilling out of the now-open doorway. It was a wolf, but with a human voice, a voice so silky smooth.
Alina, come here. Wouldnโt you like to abolish spaghetti? Itโs the worst food anyway, right?
Alina absolutely hated spaghetti.
Alinaโs eyes turned white, a swirling ball of nothingness.
She mindlessly started walking towards the wolf.
โNo!โ
Alina was right in front of the wolf, smiling.
Thank you, Alina.
The wolf backed up, raising its head high, and licked its lips.
Oh no
I was not gonna let a black smoke wolf eat my sister.
I jumped in front of Alina, waving my arms to stop the wolf from hurting her.
Ksshh
The wolfโs claws scraped against Alinaโs skin, drawing bright red blood.
Alina pawed vigorously like she was doing the doggie paddle, with her eyes closed.ย
Swshh
The wolf was gone.
Alina smiled at me, her eyes back to normal. She ran towards me and embraced me in a hug.
โThanks so much, Ben,โ she cried. โYou stopped that...thing.โ
โYou are welcome,โ I responded with lots of arrogance.
โIs it okay if I tell Mom and Dad?โ
โWell now you have a scar on your face, so yeah, tell them.โ
***
Now I sit here, on my patio, remembering that moment.
Itโs been 8 decades, 80 years since that wolf had visited me and Alina. My 88th birthday was only yesterday, and Alinaโs 94th a few weeks ago.ย
Iโm surprised I could remember something that was so long ago.
I look over to Alina, who is gazing at the butterflies in the backyard.
She always loved butterflies and always will.
I switch my gaze onto her scar.
Right below her left eye, just sitting there. Itโs faded a lot in 80 years, but it was still there.
A little brown line, starting below her eye and ending at her chin.
Faded, but still there.
โAlina, do you remember when you got your scar?โ
She smiles at me just as a butterfly comes to perch on her still fingers.
โYes Ben, I remember.โ
โDo you know what gave you that scar?โ
โSigh. Ben, they say as you get older, you get wiser, but I really donโt know what happened. I havenโt gotten that much wiser since I was 14.โ
I chuckle, along with Alinaโs smile while she looks at the butterfly.
A monarch butterfly, with orange and black wings, just like the one decades ago.
Who knows, this butterfly can be the great-grandson of that one.
I giggle with the thought, startling the butterfly and making it fly away.
Alina said, โYou know Ben, I canโt lie.โ
โYes Alina, I know.โ
โI love butterflies.โ
โI know.โ
โAnd I think I have found a new favourite.โ
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369 comments
STOP HATING ON YOURSELF!!! POINTS MEAN NOTHING COMPARED TO THE PEEPS THAT LOVE YOU!!! THEY'RE TARGETING YOU NOT BECAUSE THEY DON'T LIKE YOU BUT BC THEY DON'T LIKE THEMSELVES AND WANT EVERYONE TO BE AT THEIR MERCY!!! WE LARB YOU AMETHYST BE PROUD!!
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THANK YOU LUKE larb?
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LARB IS THE BEST WAY TO SAY LOVE!!!! OWN YOURSELF AND NEVER THINK THAT YOU'RE BAD BECAUSE OF WHAT OTHERS DO!!!
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oh ok okway luke I WILL LARB MASELF also this is cool: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XZLUfaQAkk
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YASSS LARB!!!! I have a joke for you: What did we say to the self-hating blobfish?? LARB YOURSELF!! Also YAS I WILL WATCH IT
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YAYYYYYY its singer impressions btw :D
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OMG THAT IS SO AMAZING THOSE WERE SO REALISTIC
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IKRR?!
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YOU ROCK AMETHYST AND DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YA NO! KEEP ON BEING COOL!
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:D
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YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS AMETHYST WE LARB YOU :D:D:D
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WE LARBBBBBBBBBBBBB!!! THE CIRCLE OF LARB!!!!
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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP I LOVE THIS XDD
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I MEAN I LARB THISSSSSSSSSSSSSS
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OMG YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST I LARB YOU
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Hiya! This story is random, but I hope you like it! Please give me some critique, I like to know how to make my writing better :D This is LONG, like 2100 words, so sorry bout that ๐ฌ Anyways, hope you have a great day! :) ~ Amethyst
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GIVE ME COOKIE WHERE COOKIE ๐ช I WANT COOKIE Wow! You did a great job describing everything! And now.... I NEED COOKIE ๐ช
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hahah thxxxxx yes, i described it as if I was eating the last cookie and my brother was watching me he LOVE cookies XD
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XDD COOOOOOOOKIEEEEE I canโt wait for Sapphireโs story REeEeEeEeEe
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YESSS IM WAITING
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WAaitTttIkNg IS HArrRrDerD
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yEsSsSsSS
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๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ
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:OOOOO yayyyy im almost done my new story, so brb
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Ok!
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imma upvote you at least 100 points in apology for kicking you :(((((
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from the game :((((
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NO NIANIKA IM SORRY IT WAS MY FAULT YOU DONT HAVE TO DO THAT I MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF EVERYTHING DONT :(((((
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awww....it was my fault thooooo. imma still upvote you bc i'm your friend :D
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NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONOON IT WAS MY FAULT I SHOULDVE LEFT, CAUSE I WASN'T DOING THE GAME, SO I SHOULDVE LEFT, BUT I DIDNT shanks, but you don't have to
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:D and oooohhhhh i'm sorry tho stillllllll
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Here's the link: https://skribbl.io/?LsPhKf36XG3E
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TAKE MY CUSTARD BURSTS AND BEAR HUG!!!!!
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UHM OK THANKS
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BEAR HUG I SAID
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I know you want critique, so here - 1. DA COOOKIIIEEEEEE 2. I think when Ben said "No!" it should've been like more, "dramatic" like "NOOOO!" but idk if that's just the dramatic kween in me XD 3. wow. I t was a total surprise when you said that that was 8 decades ago!! That's so cool how you did that, but I kinda wish you could've added more about the past, like did they get out? How did they get out? I know this is a loooong story, but that would've been nice :) 4. I'm surpised at the action! But I felt it was a bit short and...no...
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1. YESSSS 2. Hmmm. maybe, but Ben is kinda like my bro, and I'm Alina so he really likes cookies, but not enough to be like NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 3. oh ok. as in 'get out', its the basement. sooo they would just go up the stairs...i think I didn't make that clear, oopsies 4. sorrrryyyyy, since it was made of smoke, I kinda just did that eck I'm horrible at this stuff :D more just like a sprinkle of beauty I think ok yeah, I have learned that this isn't the greatest way of writing for me, cause of the wolf stuff and yada yada thanks :) shou...
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NOOOO THAT ISN'T WHAT I MEANTTT!!! It was amazing, when you receive critique it doesn't mean that part is bad, or that you have to change it. It's kinda like "your story was great! just a lil things here and there that would make it polished." If you really don't like it, or if you think it's a good idea, then you can change it. Also, noo your not bad, there's just always room for improvement- ALWAYS- no matter how good you are, and I just pointed that out for you. It's more like "take it or leave it" and it's 150% normal/okay for you to le...
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oh okay now i feel like if i leave it it's not gonna be good tho IM SO INDECISIVE
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XD DO YOU THINK THE STORY IS GOOD? Choose an option: a. Yes. b. No
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uhhh idk if its good or not I cant chooooose
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Nice and Interesting story! You can remember memories no matter how old you areโจ Nice job! -Ruby๐
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yay thanks! yeah if you don't forget XD :D
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True :)
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๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ
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hahahha yay thanks :DDDD
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omg I need to write dialogue like you
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hahah THANK YOU!!!
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No problem! Thanks for checking out my story by the way :)
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:D your welcomeeee :)
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Hi, Ames! Sorry we havenโt talked in a while. Anyway, great story! I really liked the vague mystery and how the two sibling had such different personalities. Maybe you could try to lessen redundancies though? I canโt wait to see what else you decide to write! -Lily Ps, ๐ฉ
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Thanks Lilian! Yes, Iโll keep that in mind for my next story :) Yayyyyyyyy
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:D
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๐ฉ
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Wowww thanks :D
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Would you like to play skribble again at 2:30? :) Megan and Riddhi are playing today.
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i would like to, but i'll join on later, cause then ill be on a walk :)
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Okay, sure! You probably know how long we usually play. :)
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yeah wait, actually i might be back by 12:30 YAY ill join with you on time :D
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Yay!!!! :DDD
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okee math is starting cya in skribleee!!!!
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๐ wow this story was beautiful i just have no words i read your first story and compared it to this one and you've grown so much as a writer like the way you describe things has gotten better i have no critiques sorry i also listening to the song you linked in your bio and i love it its also 2am and i shouldnt be up cus i have to wake up at 8am but its fine i also did like and upvote all your stories cus i was bored and i have a lot of time on my hands so might as well๐ค :)
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THANK YOUUUUUU its fine im just happy you like the story :) tHaNkS you and luna are like the only ones who read my bio XD oh dear me aRe yOu oKaY YAY THANK YOUUUUUU except get some sleep plz :D ~ Amethyst
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i fell asleep at like 6am but that usual happens everyday
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gAcK i wake up at 6 am oof
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i got to sleep at 6 and have to wake up at 8 im just never tired and even when i am i just cant sleep
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only 2 hours of sleep? wow yeah sometimes when you're tired you can't do to sleep, but whenever I have taekwondo, I go to sleep in like 5 minutes (which is insanely fast for me)
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New thread. I posted my new story! :)
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yayyyy i'll check it out right after my class :D
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Thanks! How's your art going?
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i finished the bear and the constellation and I'm probably gonna do the calligraphy today. i like doing the calligraphy on a different day, so my hand is fReSh XD
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That's so cool! XD
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:D today we have mAtH, and we're gonna start a new project that's probably about mathematicians woohoo more projects
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I think I might've found a downvoter: https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/stop-upvoting/
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yeah i know they followed me O.O
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Oh okay :)
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they say marshmallows upvote each other just to get higher on the leaderboard O-O
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Yeah, I saw that. Also, they say they want to downvote people who are upvoted.
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why tho?
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Is this u? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KBcTMRHURM
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hahaha nope i just like the song :D
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Aaaah okie
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๐ Love your bio :D
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thankss
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:D
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Oh my gosh, this was beautifullllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ช๐ชcookies for youuuuuuuuuuuu The descriptions and mystery in this were amazinggggg I don't know how you do it!!!!!! Also, the sibling bond between Ben and Alina was spot onXD That plot twist tho, with the passage and the wolf, caught me off gaurdXD This was rly good Amethyst!!!!! Nice jobbbbbbb!!!! Here's a few more cookies to further applaud you of your work๐ช๐ช๐ช
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THANK YOUUUUUU thankssss, the wolf thing was bit random, but I kinda like it XD YAYYYY MORE COOKIES i wont tell my bro XD
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๐
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