49 comments
Where did I leave my keys?
Where do people usually leave keys?
How often does a woman in her mid-to-late forties lose her kids?
Keys not kids
How often does a woman in her early-to-mid-to-late forties lose her keys?
Is losing your keys a sign of dementia?
DEMENTIA HOME REMEDY CURES NO WESTERN MEDICINE
What is a romantic dinner you can make for your 20th wedding anniversary?
What is a romantic dinner with ingredients that cost less than $60?
What is a romantic dinner with ingredients that cost less than $70?
What are cheap restaurants near me that have candles on the tables and nice tablecloths?
Where is the nearest ATM?
What do you get someone for a 20th wedding anniversary?
Where do I buy china?
How much china do I need to buy as a gift for my husband?
Do men like china?
What is the male form of china?
What music do men in their 50’s like?
What do I do if my husband isn’t romantic enough?
How to cook a steak at home
What is the difference between medium rare and medium?
How many affairs is too many?
Which commandment is infidelity?
Percentage of couples that survive an affair
Percentage of couples that survive two affairs
Percentage of couples who survive more than five affairs
What’s that song that goes “Da dee da da da dee you’re not?”
What is my rising moon?
What is my husband’s rising moon?
What are the best rising moons?
Do men stop talking as they get older?
Do men stop talking to their wives after they have an affair?
Do men stop talking to their wives after they have two affairs?
Do men stop talking to their wives after they have more than two affairs?
What perfume is best after infidelity to say “I don’t forgive you, but I’m trying?”
Where did I leave my keys?
Sexy lingerie for women over forty
Less sexy lingerie for women over forty
Couples Counselors near me
Marriage therapists near me
What is the difference between a couples counselor and a marriage therapist?
What to do about a wrinkle near your eye
Is the wrinkle near my eye cancer?
WRINKLE EYE CANCER REMEDIES
What color hair turns on men over fifty?
Where to buy cheap hair dye on sale?????
My daughter says I sound like I’m spiraling what is spiraling am I doing it?
Will cheap hair dye make my hair fall out?
Are men still turned on by the smell of apples?
How to bake an apple pie
Ingredients for an apple pie that cost less than ten dollars
What was that movie where the couple was unhappy and then happy again?
How many Oscars does Meryl Streep have?
Where did I leave my keys?
Can adopting a dog save a marriage?
Cocktails for a 20th wedding anniversary
Why does my house always smell like lavender when there’s no lavender in it?
Does smelling lavender mean I have a brain tumor?
BRAIN TUMOR HOME REMEDIES
Why doesn’t my daughter call as much???
Things daughters like talking about with their mothers
Home decor for making your husband want to stay faithful
Why are couches so expensive?
Supply Chain Furniture Problem but explain it like I’m a toddler
How long ago was my senior prom?
Is smoking sexy again?
Is milk bad again?
Is it okay to wear high heels on hardwood floors?
How old is too old for high heels?
Do men still like high heels?
Do high heels give you bunions?
BLOCK IMAGES OF BUNIONS FOREVER
Romantic spots where you can see the moon
Can moonlight cure potential eye wrinkle cancer?
Should I have an affair?
Should I have two affairs?
Should I have more than two affairs?
Who should I have an affair with?
Are mailmen still attractive?
How often do mailmen have affairs with women on their route?
What song will remind my husband that we love each other?
What’s that song about porcupines that love each other and the Sailor and Teena Marie sang it?
What’s Venmo and why does my daughter keep asking me to download it?
What romantic movies are out right now in theaters not on the tv?
Is gambling still sexy?
How much does it cost to gamble?
Casinos near me
Does Seven Rivers still have penny slots?
Does Seven Rivers have a steakhouse?
How many stars does the Seven Rivers Steakhouse have?
Is two and a half stars good?
Does the Seven Rivers Steakhouse smell like smoke because they still let people smoke in the casino I don’t know why it should be illegal everywhere but it’s not why isn’t it illegal everywhere why are people allowed to do whatever they want with no consequences and the rest of us just have to deal with it like smoking indoors or cheating on their spouses or falling out of love with their wives just because maybe she doesn’t dye her hair as much as she used to or she doesn’t know what her rising moon is or she calls the daughter you had with her together too many times because she misses her and she’s lonely and you won’t talk to her and and and and and and
Does the government really look at these questions?
Why am I seeing ads for anxiety medication on my phone?
Are you talking to my phone?
Does that medication actually work?
How much does anxiety medication cost if I get it from Canada?
How long does it take for
How
How much does a singles cruise cost?
Do they still have singles cruises?
Divorce attorneys near me
Divorce lawyers near me
What’s the difference between a lawyer and an attorney?
How much does a mailman earn?
Do mailmen make good husbands?
Do mailmen like having steak for dinner?
Love poems about mailmen
Love poems for mailmen
Why didn’t I become a poet?
Why didn’t I leave sooner?
Why do I have a freckle on my left arm that wasn’t there before?
Is the freckle on my left arm cancer?
REMEDIES FOR DIVORCEES WITH ARM CANCER
If the government is reading this, can you help me with my taxes?
Explain Venmo to me again
Explain Vemno to me like I’m a toddler
Do toddlers use Venmo?
Where did I leave my keys?
Do you know where I left my keys?
Am I okay?
Am I doing okay?
Will I be okay?
Will I be okay?
Will I be okay?
Will I?
Will I?
Are you there?
Hello?
Hello?
Just let me know if you see my keys.
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49 comments
Every REMEDY CURE made me laugh that much harder. The ending was so unexpectedly poignant, it was a really moving way to wrap up this anxious mess
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Thank you so much, Elka :)
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Hey Kevin! Wow! I loved this piece so much. I found myself reading faster and faster and faster! It reminded me of a convo I was having with a colleague today about how some people don’t experience an internal monologue. That is a thinker in itself. This internal monologue was beautiful and tragic and painful. The words you used were brilliant and I loved the one long paragraph. Great work!!
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Thank you so much, Amanda. I'm glad you liked it.
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I was really swept up in this story. It's one of the most brilliant demonstrations of anxiety disorder I've ever read. And to do it through google searches added a special kind of edge to it -- that cry "Am I okay?" is so poignant.
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Thank you so much, Kathryn.
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Very clever! Good writing! Been there, done that!
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Thank you so much, Ruth!
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Really love this take on this prompt, very clever, and really connects with my ADHD mind!
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Thank you so much, Madeline!
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Kevin, this is fantastic. The way you stitch together (presumably) Google searches into a cohesive, heartbreaking story is both realistic and magnificent. A fascinating study of loneliness and spiraling, too, and of the "rabbit hole" that exists in today's hyper-digitized world. Really creative and profound use of the prompt; thanks for sharing!
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Thank you so much, Nathaniel!
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Great story! i liked the mailman part.
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Thank you so much, Charlie!
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Fantastic, Kevin! This whole thing had me howling, what a great response to the prompt! - Less sexy lingerie for women over forty - hah I can only imagine the prior results! :) - REMEDIES FOR DIVORCEES WITH ARM CANCER - LOL! Really just so enjoyable, thanks for the story this week!
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Thank you, Wendy. It was fun to write :)
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This was such a clever take on this prompt! It’s fascinating how you put us in the head of this woman by reading her very vulnerable search questions. This story kept me laughing throughout but I also felt a growing sense of pity for the MC. I love how you evolved the plot leading to the divorce at the end. Some of my favorite lines were, “Explain XYZ to me like I’m a toddler”. Well done, Kevin!
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Thank you, Jamie. I have a lot in common with her, that's for sure haha
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This was fabulous, Kevin! It was so hilarious but also so true... 'less sexy lingerie for women over forty' and 'why am I seeing ads for anxiety medication on my phone?' totally cracked me up. I really enjoyed this, thank you for sharing. =)
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Thank you, Beth!
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I love this journey down the rabbithole of search questions and how there really is no end to a search (or story) like this one because, just like in life, one thing leads to another. This is so funny and so well executed! Now I'm going to go back and read the whole thing again.
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Aw thank you, Wally!
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I agree with with the other comments, this story made me laugh, and it hurt my heart. It's very relatable, because we all have gone down Google search rabbit holes before. Some of the lines were just great, though, like, "Why am I seeing ads for anxiety medication on my phone?" I also like the progression, and how your character evolved, even in a fragmented, search results tale.
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Thank you so much, Nona.
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Ha, I feel terrible for laughing :) It really is both funny and sad though, and quite accurate, down to the ads and everything probably being cancer. Search engines are the unsung heroes of our time, tirelessly fielding all the questions we're too embarrassed to ask other people. The sad irony being how much poor communication can contribute to a relationship falling apart. Of course, if he's having affairs, the problems do run deeper. Great take on the prompt!
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Thank you, Michal. This was a fun one!
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Kevin, this was so clever for this prompt! As I was reading, I definitely felt the sense of "Search History". This felt like opening the wife's History tab and reading her story through all of the questions she maybe doesn't feel she can ask out loud. Great job!
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Thank you so much. I loved spending time with her.
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This is amazing, such a great concept to tell a story in the form of questions yet you still give a sense of character and plot through the questions. Also it was such a good mix of funny yet sad, love that kind of humour where it's based in real emotion. I really loved the break in single lines where she suddenly breaks into this big dump of emotion too.
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Thank you so much, Kelsey!
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A story told strictly through search questions! Great idea to match the prompt and you kept the tension going throught the rainstorm of middle aged anxiety and drama.
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Thank you, Scott!
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I am obsessed with this concept, a very well executed idea! Had me on the edge of my seat.
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Thank you, Alexandra!
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Kevin, Wow! Now that was amazingly done. My pulse was racing as I read this. Great job. I found one spot you may want to fix. "Why do I have a freckle on my left arm that wasn’t there for?" LF6.
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Good catch, Lily! Thank you so much.
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Hello, I loved your story and the unique narration style you used. I am interested in your story and therefore decided to write a paper on it. However, I need some personal details to include in the introduction (author's name and a mini bio). I understand if your hesitant to share your information but I'll leave my email below, so feel free to contact me. rahafqhtani@hotmail.com
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This seems like the search history of Rebecca from Crazy Ex Girlfriend if she never got help. https://youtu.be/VsOdQKQduW0 Therapy and divorce sounds like the best course of action.
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