Bartebly's Playground

“Enter! Enter!” the malicious yet light-hearted deity cried manically.

“Have you ever read about the girl’s adventures in wonderland!?  You will see my inspiration once inside” it spoke as it hovered in front of his magic door.

Rogna sweatily gripped the hilt of his sabre tighter but knew he could do nothing.  Stay in this world and walk away, and he would fail.  His vow would be broken and he was sure to be an outlaw to the kingdom’s royal will.  Entering the translucent portal that reeked oddly of onions and glowed lavender in a tricky calming kind of way was playing part in Bartelby’s mischievous game.  Terin placed a hand on Rogna's shoulder.

“It will be alright.  We can play whatever game he is sending us into, we’re just as smart as him, deity or no.” she said confidently.  Terin always faced conflict head on like that.  Her hard will was woven into her from years of discipline as an archer in the elven comandos.

Rogna sheathed his sword and pulled his hand to his chin as he pondered.  Considered a barbarian to most in the kingdom from his large stature and eagerness to handle disputes with the speech of the sword.

“I think you’re right.  I’m no knight but this princess is our only way forward.  That or a life of being chased around all of the kingdom.”  The two would-be heroes looked at each other and sighed.  Years of traveling together brought many trials but they had never dealt with something like this.

“Bartleby, we accept and will enter.” he said reluctantly.

The god grinned from ear to ear and chuckled evilly to himself as he faded piece by piece, leaving lastly, his sinister smile.  Both stepped forward and Terin did the honors of turning the knob.  Behind the door lay a void of darkness.  Both sighed again but stepped inside.  The door closed quietly behind them and on the other side of the void, another door could be seen.  They stepped through it as well and were taken aback by the world they had entered.

A vast meadow of pink grass and trees adorning leaves of all different colors.  The sky was still blue as usual but oddly and irregularly mixed with green and yellow.  It still smelled of onions but now also of a sweet smelling nectar. Odd critters frolicked in the meadows nearby and off in the distance, a creature of immense size stomped in a dark clearing.  Rogna and Terin shuddered as they felt the vibrations from where they stood although the monster seemed to be several miles away.  The two stood in awe taking in the weird and wild world saying nothing for a while.

“So where is princess Vivalia?” Rogna finally said.

A booming voice echoed over them revealing Bartebly’s manic voice again but it was nowhere to be seen.

“Aha it’s not that simple!  Defeat my colossal creation and you’ll earn a way out of my playground.  We talk about damsel Vivalia afterwards.  Not before.  You will either die trying or be trapped here forever!” he finished with more annoying villainous laughter.

Rogna looked at his companion frustrated.

“Great…”

“Look hon, it’s gonna be possible.  God’s like them love ridiculous trials like this and heroes overcoming them.  It’s why books tell this story over and over.” ensured Terin.

“Yeah still…” he said as he sighed.  “Does it have to be a giant monster this time?”

******

The two champion’s ventured through the meadow, past rolling rabbit-like creatures, strange wildflowers with square shaped petals, oversized birds flying overhead, and came upon a beaten path heading in the direction of the giant creature.  It began to rain lightly although they could see no clouds and with it came a fishy scent.  As they walked they saw all manner of odd creatures meandering in the meadow, the most notable was something like an elk but with eight legs and heads on each end of it’s double torso body.

“An odd place indeed.” grunted Rogna.

“Let’s keep heading forward and hope the monster is all we’ll face.”

Along the path was a lonely tree with a thick tall trunk raising into the sky.  It’s branches numbered by the thousands and hung over arching to the ground.  Upon the branches were bright green fruits looking similar to enlarged apples.  Curious of them, Terin went to grab one and Rogna stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.

“Interesting I know.  This whole place is, but let us not forget we are now the playthings of a god.” he said with a stern tone.  Though disappointed she nodded in agreement and they continued on.  The path seemed to lead directly to where the creature dwelled, through the meadow into the darkness it stood.  

Now that they were closer they could make out the giant monster’s features.  It stood upon four hairy legs and had a set of four horns upon its tall long face. The face held two columns of four bright yellow glowing eyes and the middle of its face seemed to have a symbol branded into it. All the land surrounding the beast was gray and dead. Everywhere it stomped or charged died underneath it’s hooves.  Ancient ruins seemed to dot this vast area it was patrolling and if came across them, it would ram them with it’s horns turning them to rubble.  Seeing it closer than before, it’s immense size had only become more clear to Rogna and Terin.  Stopping by a broken structure resembling a shrine, the two took a rest.

“My sword will do no good to whatever that is.” he said as he sat down and  uncapped a sheepskin full of water.  Terin stood quietly eyeing the scene of the monster stomping its ground.

“Well, there must be a way or I’d say we’re in trouble.  Do you see that rune upon its face when it’s been turned toward us?  It looks like a target, or a weak spot.”

“I don’t have any better idea so we’ll go with that.” Rogna said sarcastically.

The two decided to sneak up to ruins just before the blight below the monster and craft their plan to defeat the beast.  

“You’re going to love this.  Remember when we had to dispatch that cave of gobylin’s by drawing them out.” said Terin.  Rogna sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose closing his eyes.

“It’ll be like that.  I’ll head over to that vantage point but you’ll have to get it’s attention.”

Rogna nodded reluctantly.  He understood brute swordsmanship against a behemoth was no answer.  

They proceeded to get into position to lure the beast in a way that Terin could fire an arrow directly into the rune marked upon its head.  To their advantage the monster was so large it did not notice the humans scurrying below it like ants.  Terin climbed a broken structure that stood tall enough to allow her a good shot.  Rogna crept from ruin to rubble to column hiding until she waved as the signal.  As the warrior ran out into the beast snorted and roared beginning to charge.  Rogna ran across the large expanse of dead grass as the monster turned its charge towards him.  As planned, Terin was able to quickly fire arrow after arrow in a barrage toward the center of its face.  After each landed, the monster stifled more and more until it slowed its charge and collapsed shaking the ground like a grand earthquake.  The champions ran to meet on the ground, Rogna panting from his mad sprint and Terin smiling from her skilled success.

At once when they met together, a violet swirl appeared and once dispersed, showed Bartleby standing in front of them.

“OH now look what you’ve done!  Poor Ruffles has passed thanks to you.  I was training him to roll over. Ah well, a small sacrifice and I may resurrect him if I feel up to it.” the manic god said.

“As you said, god of mischief.  Princess Vivalia.” Rogna said contrasting Bartelby’s playfulness with a serious tone.

With a grin, the deity snapped his fingers and in another swirl of purple mist appeared another portal.

“I suppose you may leave now and ask the princess to return home. Thank you for coming to Bartelby’s Playground, please tell all at the inns about your wonderful experience.” he said with a wicked smile.  The winners of his game did not humor his joking and made their way through the door.

******

They had stepped into a room looking to be one from inside of a castle, a grand and colorful study with bookshelves reaching to the ceiling.  Where no bookshelves stood, elaborate portraits of royal heirs from around the kingdom filed the walls.  Tall arched windows let in otherworldly white light that blinded if looked directly into.  Throughout the room, desks were scattered about with books piled high upon them.  Rogna and Terin looked at one another and nodded, knowing what each other was thinking.  This could be a trick.

After scanning the room they noticed a tall dark wooden chair turned away from them.  What they could see was the skirt of a royal blue dress billowing out of the chair.  Rogna unsheathed his sword and stepped carefully towards the chair.

“Princess Vivalia?  I am Rogna of Verla accompanied by Terin of the Woodland.  We’ve played in the mad god’s challenge in order to release you from his realm.” he said while still hesitating to come forward.  

They heard the thud of closing a large book and the seated figure rose and came around from behind the seat of the chair.  She stood with poise and elegance exactly like you would expect a princess to but something seemed off about her expression.  She had a peaceful and content smile, quite happy indeed.

“I am Princess Vivalia no more and no, I will not leave here with you.” she said with joy in the timbre of her voice.  Rogna sheathed his sword but crossed his arms.  Terin put a hand up to him and approached her.

“You say you are princess no more?  Tell us what you mean.  We were sent to find and return you to your kingdom.” she said inquisitively as she soaked in the beauty of Vivalia.

“I have given up my worldly status and become more like Bartleby.  He is mad and plays with mortals for fun yes, but...  my life before…” she said somberly.

“Once captured he asked me if I did not find the rise and fall of kingdoms, the thieving and banditry in the world, the lack of magical knowledge, hatred between different peoples, the disrespect of wisdom, all of our world’s ways... if that was not just as mad as he.” she told them revealing discomfort and sadness in her eyes.

“I have always wondered these things and to be a princess means to be merely wed off as a move in the world’s game of chess.  Once you arrived, the mad god went to the king at once and twisted his mind.  He is no longer concerned for his daughter and while some may search for me, they are concerned more for the kingdom now ruled by a lost mind.” she continued.

“Bartleby has made me free by imbuing me with some of his essence.  I have become part of him.  I can twist others mind’s like him but I have no want but to stay with him here or wherever he goes.  This is living a life, albeit odd, but not what I had before.” she said with a bright smile.

Bartelby appeared yet again and ensured the heroes that they had the favor of one of the many deities in the world and would not need to worry about becoming outlaws by defying the king.  Vivalia and the mischievous god embraced and looked longingly into each other’s eyes.  Rogna and Terin, although perturbed by their experience and what they went through, were mostly relieved.  The god summoned yet another portal and handed each warrior a tuft of the monster’s hair as a parting gift.  Then, oddly, he accused them of stealing the tufts before shooing them through the portal.

To their surprise they did not step back into the glade they had entered Bartelby’s world from but into a vast inhospitable desert with nothing resembling the kingdom in sight.  The two warriors looked at each other and sighed.