"Wow! I met him at last," Hint said.
"Who have you met?" Clue asked.
"I know you are the son of Bobel prize winner—Bracket," Hint said.
"Yeah, I am his son and what is a Bobel prize?" Clue asked. He was a fairly well built man with sparkling blue eyes and curly brown hair.
"Then I'm honoured to meet you. You don't know what a Bobel prize is?" Hint asked. He was a fat, dark eyed man with a round face and blond hair.
"That is what I asked you now," Clue said.
"Hey, guys. The Bobel prize winner, Bracket's son doesn't know what a Bobel prize is?" Hint announced.
"What a humble person!" the crowd gathered in the small street shouted. Then a small car stopped before Hint and Clue.
"All aboard," the driver said.
Clue struggled not to get in but the crowd pushed him inside. Hint also got into the car.
"It's an honour to have you in my car," the driver said. The driver was a plump man with an oval face, dressed in white.
"Please let me down," Clue requested.
"Hint and I will show you around the city and make you understand about this small city," the driver said.
"Why should I know about this city? I am not gonna live here," Clue said.
But, Hint and the driver didn't acknowledge him.
"Our town is known by the name Thing. This is a stunning city and has an amazing sunset and sunrise. The sun rises in the west and sets in the north," Hint said.
"What a stupid name kept to a city," Clue thought.
"The sun rises in the east and sets in the west," Clue corrected Hint.
Clue had arrived in this city to meet his mother after many years. He went to pursue his education abroad and had returned as a doctor.
"Whatever you say is right, my lord," Hint said.
"Why was this town named Thing?" Clue asked.
"Whoever gets the Bobel prize names the city and this was the name kept by your father," Hint explained.
The driver was watching Clue intently. So, he missed the road. He crashed onto a tree and the car's front part became like a jack in the box.
"Hey, you. What are you driving? You could have killed us," Clue said, rubbing away at his bruises.
"Yes, I was driving the car. When I saw you, I was charmed and wanted to watch you as long I could. We may walk from here to see the amazing monuments," the driver said, still watching Clue intently.
"Don't keep watching me. Like the car crash, you may crash onto a tree. Okay, let's walk," Clue said, mockingly.
"Wow! I have got scoldings from a scholar. This is the luckiest day in my life," the driver exclaimed with happiness.
Clue didn't know where to bang his head against. He became distressed as he was travelling with two fools.
The car driver's phone started vibrating. He attended the call and said, "Hey, Physics. I have met the great Bobel prize winner's son."
And Physics replied something and hung the call.
"Why did you name your son, Physics?" Clue asked.
"Then I would become the father of Physics," the car driver said. This annoyed Clue a lot.
Then, Hint pointed at a building which looked like a cheese block and said, "the name of that amazing monument is Butter."
"Wow! Whoever kept the name should be the greatest fool in the world,“ Clue exclaimed.
"Then that fool is your father," Hint said. At least, Clue was not born in such a foolish city and he felt happy about it.
"Mr. Car driver, you are so fat. What activity do you do everyday?" Clue asked with concern.
"I play tennis, cricket and carrom board daily," the driver said.
"How many hours do you play?" Clue asked.
"Until the battery in my mobile phone runs out," the driver replied.
Clue just rubbed his head in confusion.
"What's a Bobel prize?" Clue asked.
"It's the highest honour given to anyone in this city. It's given for great achievers in this city and your father had done a great achievement," Hint explained.
Then a huge crowd gathered in front of Clue.
"Wow! See the Bobel prize winner's son," everyone shouted in unison.
"Another bunch of fools," Clue thought.
"All of them in this crowd follow your father's path," Hint said.
Clue didn't even know about his father's path. He had not even talked to them for many years.
"You should only open our shopping mall," the crowd yelled.
"Okay," Clue sighed. He certainly had no choice.
He was lifted up by the huge crowd and dropped in front of a huge building.
Clue slowly walked near the entrance of the shopping complex.
Instead of a scissors or a knife, he was given a huge stick of wood.
"Break the door, break the door," the crowd chanted.
"But, why?" Clue asked. He saw a man with a small key in his hand and with sheer guessing knew that it was the key of the door.
"It is our tradition to break the door before entering the building," Hint whispered.
"Such destructive thoughts," Clue thought. He snatched the key from the man and opened the door.
"Ooooooh," the crowd went.
When he went into the shopping mall, Clue was shocked.
There was nothing on all those floors. No stalls and no goods. It was completely empty except a large statue of his father. He became completely clueless.
All the people in the crowd looked in awe at the empty building.
"What is this, Hint? There is nothing in this shopping mall, but all the people are watching it in awe," Clue asked Hint.
"This is the most wonderful building ever built in this city. It has completely nothing," Hint exclaimed happily.
Now, Clue had serious doubts about his father.
"What did my father achieve to get a Bobel prize?" Clue asked.
"It was the biggest achievement in the city," Hint said.
"What did he do?" Clue asked, hurriedly.
The driver slowly pronounced,"he did nothing."
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467 comments
Clue said, rubbing away at his blushes. Is he rubbing at bruises? abrasions? This reads like Monty Python- which is the measure used for absurdist humor. You are already funnier than my work in this field, because I can only write dark sarcastic or sardonic humor. Because you are so naturally talented, I have only one suggestion. It may sound strange, but try it. Write down only the dialogue, in a separate file. Set it aside for a day. See if you can correctly identify the speakers (Hint, Clue, the driver). The goal is not to memor...
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Yes , it is bruises. That's a small typo. I am glad you found it funny. I have time to edit. So, I am going to do what you said. Thank you for your suggestions. Yes, the cab driver is just a funny person I wanted to intervene. I will make it as he contractions. It isn't extra work. To make a story well, extra work should be done. (I actually weaved this story in an hour. I am glad you liked it) Thank you for reading.
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Do you have any title suggestions? Because I kept this name because I didn't have time to submit. Please give some suggestions.
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Title, "Award Winning City..." it needs the ellipses for the funny. Or "Nothing To It"
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Award winning city is nice. Nothing to it acts as a clue. I will try award winning city. I will take suggestions from everyone and choose the best. This is one of my favourite. Thank you for your suggestions and thank you for reading.
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Wow it's a really good story . Seems like you have a nice sense of humour. You're good at keeping people engaged to the story. Wishing you to write more stories.
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Thank you!!!
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This is the first time I have tried a funny story. Hope you all like it. If there is a mistake, please point it out. I need a good title. For the time being, I just kept a weird title. I would love getting some suggestions. Thank you for reading.
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-It rocked, bro!! You've got a sense of humour. You should write more funny stories from now. -I loved it!! I loved that 'battery runs out' joke. -Mistake?...um....I found some; 1) "Why did you name your son, Physics?" I think this sentence is not formatted correctly, it should be without the comma. 2) In the above👆 sentence, how did Clue know that the Physics is the car driver's son? 3) There is a typo in the last line. It should be like, 'The driver slowly pronounced, "he did nothing."' (I hope I didn't offend you, I'm really sorry i...
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-thanks -glad you loved it. 1)I don't know if its a mistake. (I didn't do proffreading even once) 2)yeah, that's a mistake ☝️ 3)okay thanks. (No way. I don't get offended easily. No, this is help) -I am worse in keeping titles. This title was given by Clara D Perry. -Sure. Will try to get one out this week. 😁
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-You're welcome!!! -Clara is so nice. She gave me awesome feedback on both of my stories. -Will be waiting.... Bye, going to school!! Have a great day!!! 😊
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-Glad to here that -Yeah, she's one of the best author and editor. She gives me wonderful advice. -i think it will be out today. I am proggressing very fast. Enjoy school, sis.
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I just saw that I didn't 'Like' this story. I'm really sorry, bro. I did it now.😊
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OMG!!!!! You did such a great job with this story. I think you added the perfect amount of detail and your plot was on point. In my eyes you deserve a 10/10! Great job!
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Thank you. Thank you for the score. I am glad I got 10/10
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Brilliant! The last line was ... weird. But this line: "Then I would become the father of Physics," <-- LOL! Awesome job at writing a humorous story, and I hope you keep on writing! PS. Congrats on reaching the top 10!
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Thank you. Yes that's a LOL!!!!😂😂😂 Thank you, Akshat. I will keep on writing and you also keep writing. Thanks. P.S. Do you have any title suggestions? Because I don't think this title fits..
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You're welcome! Yup! No, not really. I think the title's okay though!
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Thanks. If something strikes you, please tell it to me.
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Definitely!
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Thanks. Rip Black panther😭😭😭😭
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I love Narnia too! :)
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Yeah, its totally awesome. I am starting the second book today :)
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Brilliant story K. I think I can call you that. And congrats for making it to top 10 in the leaderboard
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You may call me K if you want. Thanks!!!!!!
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Great story! Kept me thoughtful! Keep writing!
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Thanks!!!!
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This was very well written! The ending left me wanting to know the rest of the story... very well done, I don't really have any feedback, except for maybe trying to add more rich description. But it could totally be a personal choice to leave it out. :) All in all, great job! you're an amazing writer and I can't wait for more of your stories!
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I weaved this story in just an hour. So, I couldn't give descriptions. I just wanted to finish it. And I was close to the finishing time. Thank you.
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Wow, all that in just an hour? I could never do that. Great job, and like I said, you don't have to have rich descriptions to make a good story. Sometimes, simplicity is what makes them great. :)
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Yup. I wrote a story for another prompt. But, it faltered. So, I wrote a new story and this is it. Thanks. Agreed :)
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:)
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:)
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Hey keerthu, I enjoyed your story. My best wishes to you. Keep going..
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Thank you for reading.
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This is funny. I like the name hint and clue too lol. You have a great imagination. “Until the battery in my mobile phone gets over” maybe say until the battery in my mobile phone runs out. But really good anyways good job
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Thank you for reading. I am glad you liked the names. Going to change. Thanks. :)
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Haha, nice work! One thing I’m a but confused about: “ I know you are the son of Bobel prize winner, Bracket," Clue said. "Yeah, I am his son and what is a Bobel prize?" Clue asked. He was a fairly well built man with sparkling blue eyes and curly brown hair.“ Clue asked himself a question, then answered??? I’m pretty sure you meant for Hint to ask the question. Also, the question makes it sound like he’s addressing Bracket. Maybe phrase it as, “ I know you are the son of Bobel prize winner—Bracket," Clue (Although I think it’s Hint) sai...
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Thanks. Changed it. Thank you for reading.
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I really like this story. It's hilarious. My favorite lines are "Then I would become the father of Physics," "Until the battery in my mobile phone runs out," and "he did nothing." Sorry I missed the deadline for editing. I guess I'll have to give you extra homework next time. ;) What happened to your other story? I thought you had figured it out.
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I am glad you liked it. Waiting for the homework. That's ok. My friend is an American too. I asked him to proofread once. That story totally faltered. I couldn't come up with a twist. How much homework I would have got this time? Where there so many? Because I just made this whole story in an hour.
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We may start the thread at this story.
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The homework this time would have been a few things a bunch of times each. For example, I noticed that you keep using the word "kept" with regard to names. I am assuming that the direct translation of "kept" is something that you use when talking about names in your native language, but in English we don't usually do that. For example, this line: "What a stupid name kept to a city," Clue thought. In English I would say "What a stupid name for a city." And this line: "Whoever gets the Bobel prize names the city and this was the name kept b...
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Okay, this time it's a little small. Yeah, kept is like that word I shouldn't use. Onto is wrong I think. But, I can't change it now. I need a nice title beacause the title I kept is really weird. I am glad I got less homework this time. Next time, please try to read the story before deadline. Are you busy every month after September?
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Hopefully I will get less busy as the year progresses. I just started a new job and it's been really busy so far, but it should get easier. I am always busy on Fridays. In general if I see it before Friday I should be able to find time for it. I did not realize you could still change the title. I'll think about it and let you know if I think of anything.
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Great. But, sadly I won't write any other story in this month Because of exams. I would have released that story before Friday but it faltered. Or I would have released it before friday. Congrats on the new job. When will you write your next story?
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How about "Clueless" for the title? The town was without Clue, since he left, and it also doesn't make sense. And Clue is clueless later in the story.
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Do you know what is post apocalyptic?
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I had to ask one of my sisters about this one. It's not a genre I have written before. Post-apocalyptic means after the world is destroyed. Sometimes there are zombies, sometimes one or two people somehow survived, and sometimes a number of people survive by hiding out somewhere deep underground. Or you could have everyone dead and have the planet colonized by aliens. The point is to have some really destructive event that should have wiped out humanity and then the story happens after that.
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Thank you. I understood. I am going to start writing.
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We can actually search the name. But, not in google. If you type in Mae Obusa in google. It would direct you straight to her profile. The same is for everyone. (🤣🤣Even I am in google.)
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Oh, cool. I forgot about that. Yes, that is why I didn't give Reedsy my real name. If you google my real name you will find out way more than I want my Reedsy followers to know about me. I see what you mean about her picture. Maybe she used the same avatar generator as I did.
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What??? is this not your real name?!!!!( Clara)
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https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/mae-obusa/ The link.
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A good try to make a humorous one that too in one hour. You are showing up in all areas. You can imagine things in no time. The best in your story is "father of physics". Keep going
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Thank you for reading.
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Hah! This is such an interesting and creative story, Keerththan. First of all, I love the names Clue and Hint and Physics. I also love the mystery of "what is the Bobel Prize?" But your ending is really fantastic - I did not see that coming. This is the kind of story that I need to go back and read again to really put everything into place, but it's so intriguing that I can't wait to read it again. Well done!
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I am glad you love the names. Thank you for reading.
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This was such a wacky tale. Solid humor; the part about being the Father of Physics made me grin. Maybe I missed something, but why were their names Clue and Hint? I get that they’re synonyms and this is a humorous story, but I’m genuinely curious what their parents were thinking. Keep it up, anyways! 😙
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No, Clue and Hint are just names. I wanted to make the names sound like very normal things. Like the place was called a thing. I may write a part 2. Anyways, thanks for reading.(would you mind liking my story?)
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Enjoy the up-votes :)
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Thank you soooooooooooooooooo much. I am going for you...
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You're ninth right now but I might do some more to secure your spot
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Check out my bio!
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:O Ty
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Thank you. I really don't know what to say. And welcome.
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Thank you sooooo much. I have done all of yours.... go check out.
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Such a clever story! Love the word play and how the characters stayed true their names! Well done!
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I am glad you loved the story. Thank you for reading(would you mind liking my story?) Thanks.
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Quite the amusing story. Had me chuckling to think of a city full of my characters Stewie and Nubert. Very entertaining. Well done on the story
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I am glad you were chuckling. Thank you for reading.
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This is the craziest story I have ever read. Congratulations keerththan, keep it up, wishes to write more and more.
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Thank you for reading.
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Hey keerththan. When’re we getting a new story. Would you mind chking me new story. And I live in Mumbai but I am the biggest fan of CSK
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Hey Hriday Saboo This week I will get one out. Yeah, sure. Great! I am also a big fan of Csk
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Hehe good. Good 😌
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