This was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives.
Isn’t it funny how, when you put emphasis on certain words, it can change the meaning of the sentence entirely?
This was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives, meaning that out of all days in their (whoever they may be) lives, this one particular day was destined to be the happiest.
This was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives. You could take that one in the way of something happened to make it the opposite of happy; something irrevocable and unwonted. Then again, it could be proving someone right, too. It could be following the description of people twirling in fields with daisy chains, not a care in the world. That would be a rather happy interpretation of the sentence, right?
This was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives.
There. That one. It’s the kicker. Hits you right below the rib cage and leaves you leaning on your bedpost, sinking to the soft carpet and curling into your heated blanket. Because your dream day has turned to a nightmare, blurry with falling ash instead of blooming roses. Because the happiest day of your life, the day when everything finally clicked together, is now the day when everything falls apart.
This was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives; that one makes me think of a ruined wedding day, of broken vows, of someone proposing to their own partner in the middle of your reserved courtyard, of flying cake and no one knocking before they open the door. A stolen day. What was supposed to be for them now taken or, maybe, given to them.
Really, the emphasis changes everything.
What’ll this story be, though? A chosen happy day out of many others, or a day proven to be the best/worst? A day gone horribly wrong or a day gone well for the wrong people?
None of the above.
All of the above.
It was different things for different people, as most things tend to be, and the beginning went like this:
“Good morning!”
A girl in a bright red jumpsuit greeted the people below, standing on her balcony and waving. Her dark hair was pulled back with a yellow ribbon and to one person on the streets, her outfit appeared to be a perfect ad for McDonald’s. He waved up to her and smiled, returning the hellos.
“How are you today, Evangeline?” He knew he wasn’t supposed to talk to her until five o’clock, but it was easy to confuse the lines of what he could and couldn’t do all the time. He let things slip, now and then, and he had to hope that in the end it wouldn't mess him up. Evangeline smiled back and turned around to go back inside because she, unlike Sebastian, was much more careful in her ways.
Things had to go well, you see, because this was the day when they would finally run off together. They had planned for months that seemed like years, every hour bleeding into centuries apart from each other. Silly, yeah, but also… what was there to fight for if not for love? Nothing was worth giving up the fireworks, the butterflies, the long walks and silent, not saying anything at all talks.
To Sebastian, Evangeline was the only time he wanted to follow.
To Evangeline, Sebastian was the clock ticking to match her own heartbeats.
They’d been planning this, okay?
This was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives.
On the other side of town, however, in a coffee shop by the littered ocean shore, the beginning went like this:
She misses the way he used to be
He misses the way she used to smile
They aren’t sure what’s broken
But maybe it’s been that way for a while.
The shock of it all is messy
Has them spinning circles in the sand
Where do you go in the dark
With no one to hold your hand?
Staring at the clouds
Making shapes when nothing’s there
Take the soft light away
Love looks different when stripped bare.
Pink smiles hide blue days
Close hands hide far minds
And the cars on the street
Keep crossing blurred lines.
She misses the way he used to be
Gave her baskets full of flowers
He misses the way she used to smile
To know they had more hours
To sit together, do nothing at all
To be the world and to see it
To have a universe together
Then to watch it burn and have to admit
That it wasn’t a one side arson
You helped to set it aflame
He knows this and she hates the fact
That though they’ve played it well
It was all a game.
It’s not fair
How they ended up
An empty bowl
From filling cups.
She misses the way he used to be
He misses the way she used to smile
Neither of them can see the door
So I guess they’ll be here for a while.
This was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives, and instead it seemed like they didn’t know why they were still having a day in their collective lives at all.
Afternoon, back at the balcony apartment, Evangeline was getting ready to leave with Sebastian because unlike the couple at the coffee shop, she was so drawn into the idea of their future together that she couldn’t wait to leave. It was a ribbing curiosity, a marvelous and warm enchantment of body and mind. Evangeline knew in the back of her mind that she was essentially throwing one life down the toilet, but what did that matter when the new one was wild and free and brighter just because of one person? Who knew, she thought to herself as she pulled on her left boot, if Sebastian was such an influence in her reeducation could there be more lessons to be learned, taught by others along the road?
She wanted out of:
the house she’d grown up in.
Off the:
balcony that she had looked down off of, like a princess stuck in a castle, for too long.
To be part of:
something bigger than herself.
It was all close, too, closer than she had ever dreamed it would be. All the nights she spent staring at the posters in her room of people in her fairytale books were now rolled up, much like the posters themselves, and tucked away in memory lane. After all, what use was memory lane when soon enough she’d be skipping next to Sebastian down Making History Avenue?
Evangeline pulled the suitcase out from under the dresser. It was full of clothes and notebooks and snacks she had taken from the kitchen because as much as she loved Sebastian, he wasn’t clothes or food or shelter, which was what she found in her writing.
“To-day my prince will come,” she sang, “To-day we’ll meet again,” she picked up her bag and threw it gently onto her bed, “And away to his castle-” she stopped herself. “No, away to our castle, we’ll go.”
“Evangeline!” There the prince was now! She grabbed the bag, draping the straps around her shoulders and pulling them tight. The balcony door squeaked as she opened it, her red and yellow outfit traded for a darker, more cohesive look. She was wanting to blend it with the shadows, not become one with the light.
“Shh,” she began to slide through the bars of the balcony, “My aunts will hear you.” That was dumb because it was only five o’clock, not midnight, and everyone could hear everyone. For the sake of drama in a sleepy town, though, the neighbors feigned oblivion to the flight of Evangeline, lovebird extraordinaire.
While one girl flew, the other fell.
She was slipping and no one was there to catch her because in another world, not this one but another one, Sebastian had never come to meet Evangeline. He’d been smashed to smithereens by a semi truck and killed instantly, without a sound but a wordless scream escaping, vacuum-like, from his lastly parted lips. Evangeline had received the news from her Aunt Helen, one of the three sisters she lived with, who had swept upstairs and said, “That bloke you liked is dead, Leena. A big ole semi truck done come and whacked his head clear off. The paramedics called your phone, said you were the boy’s emergency contact or whatnot.”
And Evangeline didn’t believe her aunt, in this other world.
And Evangeline heard Sebastian’s voice calling her from outside the window, in this other world.
And Evangeline was waiting for someone to catch her, in this other world.
Only no one was there, and she met the sidewalk with a bone chilling kiss.
It was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives.
In this same world, mind you, this wild other dimension we know little and too much about, the coffee shop couple were not arguing. They were sleeping underneath the big tree down in the park, picnic blanket wrapped up around their shoulders like a cocoon. It was a happy day. Some might even call it the happiest because in this parallel place, they weren’t drifting apart, but instead realizing that the best kind of love was not always going to be fireworks. It could be the soft flickering of a home’s chimney, all lit up and beaming for the winter holidays. They realized love was not always going to be butterflies, either. It could be the way you look at someone while they do something simple, like watching the clouds or chopping up an onion.
In this world, it was the happiest day of their lives.
What’s the moral of this story, if you can call it that? Is it a testament to a scientific theory of multiple universes all bouncing around in the same heaven ordered chocolate box? Is it a warning, a history?
No.
It’s just a reminder that emphasis,
Makes all the difference.
One way, the story ended with a beginning, and the in the other:
It was too late.
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82 comments
I LOVED this story Rhondalise! I think you did a great job, and this doesn't seem like a brain-fried story to me! XD
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Oh awesome, thanks for reading!
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No problem! :)
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Warning: this may be a brain-fried edition of the story I wanted.
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the inside of being buried alive? (from ur bio) alise, maybe I'm stupid but i don't understand?
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It's just a really dumb metaphor, don't worry about it!
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okay :)
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Poetry, it is. Loved this so much. It's formatted creatively. I never thought about the emphasis of that one little sentence. Also, the rhyming poetry part was lovely. Probably my favorite part. :) This was fabulous.
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Hiyee, Rhonda, I have a feeling you might specialise in this profession. So, any tips on how to irritate your elder brother to death?
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Oi, well, I just have a younger brother but let's see. You could... does he have a girlfriend? You could tell her (little, not offensive) secrets every time she comes over to the house.
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🤣🤣 I wish!! Lol, I do see him texting someone on Instance all the time, lol
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.... hmmm, that could work. My brother had an imaginary girlfriend from Canada and we set up this whole thing to trick his friends into thinking she was real.
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Lolllll, nice! Did it work?
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Yeah, for a while!
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I love how you define the different meanings of the prompt's sentence and then go on and use them all! This is a really beautiful creation, Rhonda. I enjoyed this part: "She wanted out of: the house she’d grown up in. Off the: balcony that she had looked down off of, like a princess stuck in a castle, for too long. To be part of: something bigger than herself." I'd suggest making your section breaks a little clearer, by indenting more or using asterisks or something. And you know I love the incorporation of lyrics or po...
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Hi! Thanks for the feedback! So you'd just cut the poetry line entirely, correct? And I think it makes total sense to do that, like I said, this was the "hey, let's dump everything in one" cake of a story and too much sugar in a cake is GROSS! How would I tell the story of the coffee couple in place of the poem, though? Any suggestions are welcome and if not, I'll figure it out. :D
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I would, yeah. Well, you could write a scene of dialogue where they sit at a table and drink maple lattes and talk about love.
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FINALLY. I'm going to read this thoroughly in a few minutes :)
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Awesome blossom don’t eat possum! :)
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This line is its own universe: Close hands hide far minds. Very interesting exploration, says someone who likes when things get meta, and peaking into parallel universes.
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Very interesting. I love how “Evangeline” and “Sebastian” come to embody all the couples you’ve featured—as if you’re saying, no one is special, you’re only happy because you got lucky, etc. Kudos 😙
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Okay so, this took the chocolate cake! Your writing style is the distinctiest of distinct and it's so poetic yet also so realistic and heart-touching. Hands down, so many authors have been coming up with unique elements lately so I loved your emphasis concept, one of my favourites. This is looking to me like a shortlist.
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Ahh thank you so much! I cut down part of the story after several people recommended doing so I'm glad it still was the same story without the extra parts! I was worried it wouldn't be cohesive/coherent the way I'd written it but yay, it made some sense!
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First story in a while Rhonda! "unwonted." minor typo here--in the third paragraph. "Nothing was worth giving up the fireworks, the butterflies, the long walks and silent, not saying anything at all talks." Might want to consider hyphenating that last clause to fix the flow; "and silent not-saying-anything-at-all talks." "No more just king and queen" Try out "the" instead of "just"--it should clarify the meaning while holding rhythm scheme. "Restless parties They visit with hopes Of finding something To cut the uneasy ropes...
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Hi, Leo! Yeah, thanks for pointing out the specific things that weren’t working because I wasn’t sure myself and now I can get to editing! Glad you liked... parts of it 😂 and soon you’ll like it as a whole. P.S Unwonted is a word of its own.
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Unwonted is a word??? No! I was not aware of this! I must add it to my vocabulary! *dictionary noises*
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Yeah! So it means unprecedented or literally unwanted, can also mean weird and out of the ordinary. If you read any Charles Dickens books, you’ll see a lot of “unwonted circumstances.”
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Oh nice! I'm familiar with "wont" but not it's more advanced form. I've actually never read anything by Charles Dickens... ;)
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Oh boy, well, I recommend you do!
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Wow!!! This Story was exceptional!. I just joined Reedsy and I have to say, I'm glad I did. I didn't want this story to end, I wanted to keep on reading, I was addicted. I was so beautiful and so thought provoking. Happiness and Sadness graceful displayed, through a view of what could happen, or what might happen. I am definitely going to be reading your other stories. Great!, Great! Great Piece of writing Rhondalise. Thank you so much for sharing.
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Hi Don! Welcome to Reedsy and thank you so much for reading, I’m glad you liked this one, it was on the rocks whether I should post or not!
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I'm so glad you posted it!! It was so great. I honestly felt so much joy reading it ( the kind of excitement that makes you wish it was a book). Your writing is really good! :)
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Absolutely amazing
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U did a GREAT job Rhondalise!
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Hi Rhondalise I just wanted to know what you meant by these lines "Then again, it could be proving someone right, too. It could be following the description of people twirling in fields with daisy chains, not a care in the world. That would be a rather happy interpretation of the sentence, right?" Great story btw loved everything!
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Hi Natya! That sentence was just splitting the second interpretation of “this was supposed to be the best day of their lives,” because I couldn’t decide which one to use. Thank you for reading and I’m so glad you enjoyed it! Do you have stories up?
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RHONDALISE YOU ARE A GENIUS! I love how it lapses into poetry in the middle! And the bit about how the girl's outfit was like something out of an ad for Macdonald's was great! :) Keep writing!
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Woooow! I love this so much! This is awesome! This is a very descriptive story that draws you in instantly! Thanks for writing! :D
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Awesome story. I really loved the short lines in the middle. They made they story move more faster and interesting. Amazingly done. Enjoyed reading it. Keep writing. Would you mind reading my new story “Childish dream?”
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I like it! It's dark, but in a good way, a fun way.
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Amazing story!!! The structure is so unique and I love how you show that an emphasis on one word of a sentence can change its meaning entirely. I'm excited to see what you write next!
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