The School Sports Day, a memoire........

Submitted into Contest #102 in response to: Frame your story as an adult recalling the events of their childhood.... view prompt

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Adventure Bedtime Funny

A sad but true account written in memory of lost friends.............

The date is imprinted on my mind, 14th July 1972. It was a Friday, it was a warm sunny day, but the worst thing about such a fine sunny day was that it was going to be ruined. Why, because it was the school sports day.

I hated school sports day because I am not the type of person who likes to be at the forefront of attention and as I was to take part in the event, for me it was a day of dread!

The day began by having to attend school at eight thirty, taking with you your sports kit in preparation for the event or events that you were due to take part in. This instruction however, meant travelling two miles in the opposite direction from the sports ground just to shout out “Yes Sir” to Mr. Grimsdyke, the form teacher at registration before then having to make your own way on foot the four miles from Longbridge to Bournebrook sports ground where the sports day event was always held.

My group of friends were a diverse bunch from all backgrounds and had known each other through previously attending the same school and had bonded in some sort of strange way. We always hung around together when at school, looking out for each other, watching each other’s back. I think the reality of it was that as a group of friends we were amongst the poorest in our school so always had to find ways around anything that involved paying out money.

Getting to the sports ground was simple according to Mr. Harvey the headmaster, just catch the number twenty seven bus, it stops right outside. Sure, buses pass there alright but that meant paying for the privilege which for us was out of the question, we had no money. None of us could afford pushbikes either, so we had no choice but to walk.

The school could not afford to supply a bus but they expected everyone to make their own way to the event, something that would not be allowed in today's world!

To amuse ourselves en route, we used to wave at the bus drivers and passengers as they sped past using our specialised and crafted "Winston Churchill" gesture which involved the raising of two fingers. We couldn’t really see who was on the bus because of the reflection of light on the glass, it was just a bit of fun to us, we were just fourteen and making the best of the situation we were in at the time.

We knew all the short cuts around the area, all the alleyways, all the cut throughs; they added that bit of fun to the journey. Usually one of the group of friends would invent or exaggerate a story about a murder, a flasher or a rabid Alsatian that somebody or other had the unfortunate misfortune to experience whilst walking down the very alleyway we were about to walk down.

The alleyway itself was at least half a mile long with thorn bushes lining each side. At about halfway down, someone had erected feather edge board fencing to border their garden and to house a rather vicious dog. As we approached the alley, we all clenched our fists in preparation for any attack that might ensue. I stopped mid stride and pointed out that if it was a rabid Alsatian that made the attack, fists would be useless! However, John Gaffney provided the answer, if Wayne went ahead of us; the smell of his pants would either scare away or indeed attract the dog allowing us to make a hasty escape!

Wayne Small for some reason always smelt of excrement, he was like a walking nappy. I pointed out the fact that we would be down wind of Wayne but given the alternative choice would be bearable! Also, given that it would be a sudden and surprising attack on Wayne, the shock may well cause a sudden natural bodily function in the pants area; however the smell could not be any worse than it was now! Despite his usual protests, Wayne went on ahead as instructed.

It was David Bevington who suggested we hide in the undergrowth when Wayne was not looking. David had his own affliction to contend with, as most kids do. His particular affliction was a constantly running nose and he always had what we called "a lime ripple candle" hanging off the end of his nose. He also had a nasty habit of licking the snot off the end of his nose with an exceptionally long tongue. Nobody ever shared their lunch sandwiches with him!! However, as I recall, David became a big hit with the ladies for some reason a short time later!

So, we hid in the undergrowth, Tom Brown who was only a member of our group because he provided the cigarettes. He was allowed to smoke at home so always had a pack of twenty in his pocket. Suddenly and without warning, Tom started screaming like a banshee as if we were being attacked. We all joined in the screaming and on the signal, became silent and stood still, hidden in the brambles.

Wayne shouted us, we didn’t answer; he became more concerned and ran to where he had last seen us looking back and forth hoping to catch a glimpse of one of us. He called out again, panic tinged in his voice. He came a little way into the undergrowth before we all jumped up from behind a bush, arms waving and screaming loudly. Wayne ran away, terrified that we were every bit the monsters we had talked about before walking down the alleyway.

We eventually found Wayne a little way up the alley just around the next bend. In fact we could smell him before we saw him. We all laughed and calmed him down before pushing him ahead of the pack as an attack of some sort was still an option whilst we remained in the alley.

We were approaching the feather edge border which told us we were about three quarter of the way along the alleyway. Tom generously crashed the fags but he only had one match to light the cigarette. The pressure was on Tom and he felt our piercing eyes on him. If the match went out before he could light the cigarette he would suffer the disdain of the group. There was no wind so Tom, being the champion lighter of cigarettes even in windy conditions, managed to light our cigarettes.

We could see Wayne ahead near the feather edge boards, he did not smoke, but we wished he did as it would have somewhat disguised his unfortunate odour!

As Wayne reached the feather edge boards, a huge dog jumped at the fence barking and growling. It was trying to get through the fence at whoever was on the other side. Wayne fell backwards with the shock; water ran from the short leg of his trousers. We laughed of course because we were at a safe distance. Then we could see the dog’s paws gripping the top of the boards, trying to pull itself up and over the top to get at whoever had dared to go near his property. Wayne ran off in terror leaving a trail of water behind him. We found him further up the alleyway; he had no trousers or pants on and was cleaning himself up with a huge dock leaf. We all ran past the rabid dog still hanging on the top of the fence and left Wayne alone with his ablutions.

We waited at the end of the alleyway and Tom crashed the fags again and we begged a light from a passing pedestrian who was only too pleased to be of help. Wayne joined us a few minutes later followed by a dozen or more blue bottles hoping to feed off his unfortunate event.

We arrived at the sports ground and duly reported to Mr. Grimsdyke to check in. He ticked off our names without a spoken word. Wayne approached him and as soon as he uttered his name, Mr Grimsdyke clutched his nose and took Wayne by the left ear directly to Mr. Lewis the history and gym teacher. We saw Wayne get bundled into Mr Lewis’s Morris 1000 Traveller car and Mr. Lewis took him off in the car, opening all the windows of the car as he sped away.

The event itself went well with me, Julian Race coming second in the javelin, after narrowly missing the judge’s leg. John Gaffney came second in the sack race, Tom Brown winning the shot put and Wayne, well he arrived at the end and it was the sweetest we had ever smelt him! Mr. Lewis had taken him back to Wayne’s house where he was made to bathe and change by his mother before being brought back to the event just in time for him to join us in the four mile walk back to school!

We had to report to Mr. Grimsdyke before leaving and he congratulated us all on our achievements and told us to report to him as soon as we arrived back at school to ensure we were all safe. We did not think there was anything wrong with that instruction as that is what normally happened on sports day, it was his way of making sure you didn’t bunk off early!

We arrived back at school earlier than we would normally have done because when we reached the bus stop, Todger Brown who was allegedly attracted to other boy’s, hence his nick name and of course being the odd brother of Tom was waiting there. The open back double decker bus pulled up and Todger got on, flicking his hair back with a backwards flip of his head as he always did. The bus pulled away and we all jumped on to the platform at the back. Luckily we all managed to stay on for three stops before the conductor noticed us and threw us off for not paying.

As we stood on the pavement, Mr. Lewis pulled up in his primrose coloured Morris Traveller and surprisingly offered us all a lift back to school. We all squeezed into the back of the car because as we knew, Mr. Lewis liked to stand and watch the boy’s go through the showers after a cross country run, we were never sure of him although he was a married man.

We arrived back at school and reported to Mr. Grimsdykes office. He hadn’t yet arrived back so we waited in the class room. Suddenly the classroom door was kicked open and in walked Iain Ferris and John Joyce the school’s best fighters and tough as old boots. They had arrived at the school at the start of the term from another school on the other side of Birmingham (UK). Since starting at the school they had fought their way up through the ranks of school fighters to become the best. They were feared wherever they went. I suddenly had the urge to urinate as Iain stood face to face with me. Julian he said with a smile on his face. Hi Iain I replied wondering why he was calling me by my first name and not Race as was the norm, you OK mate. A dickey bird tells me you play a musical instrument he asked, guitar I hear? Err a bit I said just in case he played guitar as well and did not want to imply I was better than he was. Play me something he said. Sorry Iain, I broke a nail this morning on the javelin, it smarts a bit I said defensively. I’ve heard through the grapevine that you are pretty good he said? Who said that Iain, well he’s a liar and I’ll.. John interrupted and said “I did”! Well not too bad I said feigning pain from my allegedly broken nail. Grimsdyke plays nursery rhymes to the first year on guitar said Iain and he walked to Mr. Grimsdykes stock room and opened the door. Here’s his guitar, play me something. Sensing Iain’s urgency I told Tom Brown to watch for Mr. Grimsdyke at the door. The three of us, Iain, John and I crowded into the small space of the stock room. I checked the tuning and gave them the full rendition of T Rex, Hot Love with vocal. I looked up from the G chord and Iain and John were smiling. At the end, I put down the guitar and we exited the stock room. Iain then astonished me by asking if I wanted to join his new band as a guitarist. I quickly ran through the pro’s and con’s of the offer in my mind and after thinking of the benefits of having the two best fighters as band mates, I accepted and roped in Tom, Wayne, David and John as the road crew.

Mr Grimsdyke came into the room. What do you want Ferris, Joyce? Nothing Sir, we’re just talking to Julian about band practice. Mr. Grimsdyke looked at them suspiciously and they left. He turned to me, Wayne, Tom, David and John and said right you lot, what the hell gives you the right to stick two fingers up to me when I was on the bus this morning, I want you all to write out one hundred lines after school, he picked up a piece of chalk and wrote on the blackboard “To learn from my mistakes I must write out one hundred times, I must not stick two fingers up to Mr. Grimsdyke”.

I think of those day’s sometimes and wonder where all the other people who were in my class are now. A tear comes to my eyes every time as I recall that John Gaffney was killed on his first outing on his 50cc moped, David Bevington drowned in the River Cole after an accident on a cross river swing, he apparently knocked himself out and fell face down in the river, no one else was with him. Tom died of leukaemia at sixteen. Iain lived till he was forty nine and died from a heart attack, I’d seen him a week earlier at a restaurant in Alvechurch, he was morbidly obese and I was shocked that such a nice looking lad had changed so much. John Joyce went into the army at seventeen, unable to find work; he was killed in Ireland a couple of years later. Wayne, I lost touch with Wayne after his parents moved away after he finished education. I have just found his name on social media; he died of liver cancer only a few weeks before.

I’ll never forget those friends, and Wayne, I can still smell him now!

©Julian Race 20/06/2021

July 11, 2021 15:30

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2 comments

Julian Cope
11:33 Aug 07, 2021

Excellent well written story with my kind of humour!

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Julian Race
06:31 Aug 08, 2021

Why, thank you Mr. Cope, glad you liked it :-)

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