*Trigger warning: Suicide*
Silver sat next to Blue in the early morning light, one of his wings curled around Blue’s tiny body as they watched the sunrise. Blue’s eyes were wide and fascinated; due to his time with the scientists, this was his first sunrise. The corners of Silver’s mouth twitched up into a slight, rare smile at the wondrous expressions on the smaller angel’s face. He should have felt the pure joy of seeing the skies sooner, Silver thought quietly.
The pure ones like Blue deserved to see the sky and enjoy the vast expanse of the heavens above. It was the failed dark creatures like Silver himself that deserved to be here, skulking around the earth. The scientists had given the wrong creatures the freedoms; the truer angels should be flying, not the assassins. Silver glanced at Blue’s right wing; the feathers were growing back from the regular clippings and soon the primaries would be long enough to fly. Silver could imagine the look on Blue’s face the day he finally was able to fly...he could feel the happiness even now. Maybe in a week, they could...Silver lost his train of thought and was startled as Blue’s head settled on his shoulder.
Blue still looked fascinated with the sun, but as the vibrant colors faded to the now cyan sky, Silver felt a calmness in Blue that he had never seen before. Silver himself was never calm, if he were he would have instead assumed he had been drugged. Instead, he often sat still with deadly laziness that one might see in a tiger or a leopard. Silver was like a coiled snake, still but ready to move with a quick deadly accuracy. Not now...he wasn’t calm exactly, but he was less on edge than he should, less on edge than the norm. Until he heard the faint sound of fluttering wings that quickly began to grow in loudness.
“Blue!” he whispered quickly, breaking the spell. Silver yanked his wing back in, nearly knocking over Blue in the process. Blue, as confused as he was, still followed Silver up off the ground and under the cover of the nearby pines. As Silver yanked Blue down to the ground underneath one of the larger trees. Silver felt guilty as he saw the pinpricks of blood dotting Blue’s hand where he had fallen on the sharp needles, but this was far better than the alternative.
He spread his dark-colored wings over Blue’s pale cyan ones, covering the bright splash of color. That would have been a dead giveaway against the dusty brown earth. They lay perfectly still there for about 30 minutes since Silver insisted on waiting till the noise had been gone for at least five minutes.
“I think it’s safe Sil,” Blue whispered. Silver begrudgingly agreed and folded in his wings after a swift shake-off of the dirt that had been rubbed into his feathers when he had taken cover under the tree. Blue’s light-colored wings, however, stayed the dusty brown even when he tried to shake them out. Silver’s heart twinged sadly, remembering another pair of small brown wings. It had been a different time, and Silver had been a different angel then. Now, all that was left of Hope was gone and he remained.
“Silver?” questioned Blue sounding a bit worried. Silver realized was staring and looked away.
“It’s nothing,” he answered, trying to sound reassuring. It wasn’t a convincing ruse, but Blue, who always believed what people said, believed him and chirped an “Okey!”. Silver forced a tight grin and Blue beamed back, guilt stabbing Silver in the chest.
He hated lying to Blue...but was that really true? He had been doing it for so long, since they met really, so could he truly say that he hated it? Could he really say that he had regretted it? No, he admitted to himself, as wrong as this was he couldn’t regret it. He had felt sorry for his innocent target but he had never felt remorse for what he was doing, not really. It didn’t matter though, not now. It was time for his final lie.
“Hey Blue?” Silver called out.
“Yeah?” chirped out the reply. Blue would have no idea what was coming.
“I have to go back home.” He wasn’t taking Blue to where he lived. But Blue wouldn’t know any better. The chipper angel’s face fell and Silver quickly backpedaled.
“You should come with me,” he added, hating himself with every word. Blue’s face brightened up immediately. The small creature wouldn’t know that he would be trapped when they arrived. He wouldn’t know that Silver would be taking him back to the labs and a lifetime behind bars and glass panes. He wouldn’t understand the pure guilt Silver was feeling; he would only remember that he had trusted Silver...and been let down.
“Let’s go then!” said Silver with a forced grin plastered onto his face. It had never been this hard before to hunt his targets. A flash of the blade, a thump of his wing and it was over. He would collect evidence, usually a wedding ring or other jewelry, and leave and never look back. He wasn’t even killing Blue, so why was it so hard? He was just another target in the end.
Silver shook his head vigorously, clearing his more unhelpful thoughts. As much as he tried to keep people out of his head, being trapped in there alone with his thoughts was almost worse. It was a different sort of poison, one’s own mind. He glanced over at Blue who had gotten distracted chasing a bright orange monarch butterfly. Blue’s mind was one of the few, Silver thought, that had escaped tainting. Blue was 19 years old and still innocent as a 5-year-old, if not more so. Silver, however, was 21 and his mind was beyond further taint; being an assassin-and being in the real world-did that to you.
Silver called Blue over and squatted down, beckoning for the smaller angel to get on his back. Since Silver was the only one who knew how to fly, he would have to get them to the warehouse with the other assassins; it was the place Silver had gotten the assignment and so the place he was to report back to. Silver stood up and with a few sprinting steps launched himself into the air. Flapping hard to pull himself and the tiny barely noticeable weight of Blue into the sky, Silver tried his best not to knock Blue off of his back. As they reached a cruising height, Blue nestled his face into Silver’s neck and held on even tighter. Silver, of course, didn’t show emotion but since Blue couldn’t see, he indulged himself in a real smile. This was where Blue was meant to be. ...but instead, he was being taken back to a lab.
The moment was poisoned now. And Silver wiped the smile off of his now expressionless features.
About half an hour later, they could see the warehouse; a giant rectangular metal building that looked like, you guessed it, a warehouse.
“You actually live there?” Blue asked, sounding incredulous.
“Yep,” lied Silver convincingly, “Home sweet home.”
They landed in the very front of the building and Blue slipped off of Silver’s back. Silver nodded at the two guards (Levi and Rio) and walked inside, Blue following closely behind. For the sake of appearances, Silver stiffened his wings, raising them up and slightly out in a dominant position. He was beta here and he needed to re-enforce that since he had been gone. This simple display of Silver’s kept most of the other angelic assassins at bay and, more importantly, kept them from messing with Blue. Although Silver realized, he was the biggest threat to Blue’s safety now.
“We’re almost there,” he told the small angel, who looked extremely excited. As they neared the end of the halls, Silver quickened his pace and Blue had to take swift hopping steps to keep up. The sooner they got to the end of the hall, the less time Silver would have to lose his crumbling resolve. They arrived at the end of the corridor and Silver gave a pointed glance to the messenger who had been waiting by the heavy steel door. The messenger, Luca, nodded curtly and scrambled off to inform the scientists of their subject’s arrival. Then it was just the pair of them, Blue and Silver.
Silver typed in the code keeping the heavy steel door closed and stepped back as it swung outwards. It creaked as it opened, hinges complaining bitterly from years of little use. The area in front of the only two cells was dim. The doors of the cells were open and Silver led Blue into the cage. There was a bed on the left side and a small bucket in the corner that served as a bathroom, but that was the only furnishing the bare room had to offer. Blue looked confused, but Silver thought he’d be understanding soon. It was time; Silver had to go.
“I’m so sorry Blue…” he whispered hoarsely.
Silver hesitated then kissed Blue’s cheek. He turned away then, leaving Blue’s wide eyes and fluttering wings behind. He was leaving it all behind and he was sorry but this was his job. As Silver walked away, wings at a slight droop, the cell doors slammed shut behind him.
“Silver!” Blue shouted desperately, and Silver heard a louder fluttering of wings. Not the usual happy flutters that Blue made, but an awful, hopeless rustling as Blue’s wings hit the bars and ricocheted off of them. Through tears, the first in over ten years, pricked at his eyes, Silver didn’t look back. He couldn’t; if he looked back he would see the betrayal in Blue’s eyes and have to face the reality of what he had done. Instead, he kept walking until he was out of the building and took to the evening sky. Silver flew and flew and flew, numbing his pain in the freezing night air.
He flew until he reached the lake where they had watched the sunrise together. It had just been this morning and it was too late now. He slumped down onto a rock, letting his wings droop and brush the ground. He looked up; the sun was gone now and things could not be the same. It was too late to fix it.
Silver was numb inside as he watched the moonlit lake. He pulled his dagger out of its sheath, watching the shadows play over the icy blade. He rested it over his wrist and gave an experimental quirk of his hand. A drop of shimmering silver blood oozed out and slid down his wrist. He hadn’t been there for Blue the way he should have been. Silver lifted the blade and brought it directly over the pulsing artery. He had failed him and now he was gone. He brought the cold steel down to his wrist. Without Blue, there was nothing now. “From dust, we came, and to dust, we shall return,” muttered Silver and he pressed down the blade.