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Adventure Fiction Fantasy

Vibranium was made solely for me. It came to me and obeyed me. It taught me how to live. I had a strong desire towards it; maybe even some lust, but I knew for a fact that this belonged to me.


Nevertheless, no one understood this substance.


Why would they?


The immense potential the vibranium holds is astounding. We, as a world, could combat genetic diseases and create a dynasty. Yet, no one knows where this precious material comes from. But trust me, I’m going to be the first one to find it.


Above me, I heard a siren wailing. Someone’s here. They have found me. I felt the tension when I heard the intensity of the footsteps. Dum Da Dum Da Dum. Each one was louder than the other. In my left hand, I held a vibranium shield that could reflect and absorb kinetic energy; yes, exactly like the one that Captain America has, but much better. On my right, I clutched vibranium arrows that could pierce through absolutely anything. I had been making these for over a year and now was my time to use them.


They entered inaudibly, and I hid behind the pillar; they had not seen me yet. Everything about them was robotic. They moved like robots and scanned everything in the room, and stopped at the vibranium. Coming out from under the shadows, I made my way into the arena and threw my arrows at each one, and kept on doing so until the one at the end came and caught my spear. He threw down his mask and looked me in the eye.


I couldn’t believe it. This was not real. This couldn’t be possible.


Oh no no no.


I rubbed my eyes, but nothing changed. It couldn’t possibly be like this. I observed this man; he had dark chocolate skin and curly black hair, his eyes were mildly brown, which looked like a milk chocolate river, his lips were pink like cotton candy. He was completely identical to me. Everything about us was the same: up to the same freckles, the same hair type, and the same tattoo on his wrist that had the letter W in the middle. Looking at him, I could see that he also had vibranium weapons. How did he get these? I wanted to lean forward and to touch this being. I couldn’t do that. He was trying to kill me but he didn’t and walked away. Looking as baffled as I was.


Questions infiltrated my mind and set off a negative cascade of inquiries to harm me. What had I just seen? I felt these questions suppressing my neurological tissues; I needed to get out of here. They will come again and next time they will show no mercy.


But where will I go?


I have stayed here for 5 years since the day that my foster parents ditched me. My foster parents were the only family I had left and told me to be grateful for them, but I wasn’t grateful because they were monsters. They were cruel, barbaric creatures whose only intent was to make my life filled with pain and suffering. I always got told that my biological father was a King and that I should never actually tell anyone and they meant I was secretly part of the nobility.


Where to now? I thought.


I held up the vibranium, however; it was trying to move out of my hand and it was trying to guide me somewhere. The incessant buzzing and the writhing of the vibranium were telling me to go somewhere. Then it all stopped and all I could hear was the persistent mumble of the word ‘Africa’ in the distance.


It was leading me somewhere.


It went from a mumble into a chant. I could hear it all around me, but no one else could. I could feel the vibranium in my veins; my blood pumped with the force of the vibranium in my hand. It was in me.


It baffled me. It baffled me because I needed to gain another perspective. I needed to take a step back and see the wide-angle version. My brain couldn’t process my subconscious brain. This had never happened before. The vibranium became warmer as it absorbed all the heat from my hand.


Then it hit me: what if I get discovered possessing this secret substance? Then I could die. Just then, my thoughts scattered like a flower scattering its seeds in a strong wind and I remembered something vague from my past. I heard someone telling me, “We will not let our fear of discovery stop us from doing what we want” and maybe this was my father, the King. This is the only memory I have of my past.


That is why I have to find where all this vibranium came from and that is why I wanted to go to Africa.


With every mountain peak, there was another. With each stretch, I reached greater altitudes, and with every stride, I got stronger. I felt the sharp rocks as they whispered to walk lightly. The vibranium grew stronger in my hands; it vibrated more and kept on leading the way until I came off the mountain range. Then it stopped shaking.


I felt a powerful sensation of sway coming from here. It was in the middle of a field and then the vibranium lost all its temperateness and fell to the ground. Something was pulling me forward, it was something that attracted me like a magnet; it felt familiar, a little too familiar. Then it literally hit me: a transparent barrier. They had sealed this wall with some translucent substance. I needed to get inside somehow; I needed to do something. There I saw it out of the corner of my eye: it was the letter W on the ground, just like the tattoo on my wrist.


Perplexed. Yes, completely perplexed. What was this place? What was my connection to this place? Why am I here?


Then he came through the wall towards me. I couldn’t see where he came from or how he did this. I saw his face; he was the man who looked identical to me. He was everything like me…


I asked him who he was and where I was and I began telling him that the vibranium lead me here and that I needed some answers desperately.


"We know this place as Wakanda;" he said.


Wakanda; that seems quite unusual. Why? Because it wasn’t even on the map. It was a hidden place overflowing with vibranium and they had enough to last them for centuries, but no one knew about them. This man who was standing opposite to me and looked exactly like me introduced himself as Abeo.


Before I got to answer, three men pulled me inside the walls, and there, I saw it: the city grew as a platinum petal into a teal sky. This city had a heart, a rhythm, and a beat- all revolved around vibranium. I had never seen so much vibranium in my whole life. From the railway lines to the streetlights, were all powered by vibranium; it was the heart of this place. From the trees in the streets to the mansion in the middle, the city was alive.


They dragged me across the entire city and put me in a room filled with soldiers. I couldn’t run freely or enjoy the outdoor world. Why? Because I was an outsider and I didn’t belong here, but there was something about this place that seemed memorable to me; none of this was new to me. The city beckoned me; it chanted my name, and it called me to worship it.


Then the door flew open and there he was: Abeo and he looked as astounded as me.


He commanded me to get up and follow him, and I obeyed. We walked through the mansion up onto the floor with a throne. They had smothered it with vibranium and gold. Chandeliers were lighting up the room, and I saw enormous pieces of tapestries representing the Wakandan past, and it was mesmerizing. The weapons and machinery were far more advanced than ever in history; this was a utopia.


An old woman entered with her hair braided into a crown and her face was like mine with dark chocolate skin and freckles. However, her eyes were deep blue like the rough sea but tender like the waves on a beach. As she walked in, everyone bowed and greeted her, so I did the same. Then it occurred to me: she was the Queen. I saw on her wrist that she also had a tattoo of the letter W etched into it. I looked around and everyone had this tattoo engraved on their wrist.


She didn’t sit on the throne but on a chair to the far side and looked at me; she looked overwhelmed, like the rest of them. I wanted to say something to break the silence, but Abeo met eyes with the Queen and she nodded.


I couldn’t believe what she said afterward. She told me I was the Prince of Wakanda and Abeo was my twin brother. She told me I got captured in the late wars and they tried to find me but they couldn’t and all hope vanished. Then it came to me: the Queen was my mother.


I asked who my father was, and they told me his name was King T’Challa; I was part of the nobility here in Wakanda and then I remembered that my foster parents told me I was secretly part of the nobility and that my father was a king. It all made sense now.


There he came in: the King and everyone bowed. As he looked at me, tears streamed down his eyes like a river escaping a dam. My parents came over to me and hugged me telling me, they will never let go.


It baffled me: When I heard them calling me ‘Prince Aldrin of Wakanda’ my heart skipped a beat; I knew I was part of the nobility, I never actually thought of myself as a Prince. When looking at everyone’s faces, I knew for a fact that this was my actual family. I looked over the magnificent city which was my own and there it was: all vibranium.


Then everyone chanted “Wakanda forever.”




August 08, 2021 12:04

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225 comments

Ruth Smith
14:08 Aug 09, 2021

Very good Black Panther story. I enjoyed it very much. You have a typo in the sentence "our fear of discovery stop of from doing what we want” I think you meant stop us from instead of stop of. Good job!

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Palak Shah
19:33 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks for this amazing feedback and thanks for spotting my typo I will fix that right now lol :)))))

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Jon R. Miller
11:06 Aug 09, 2021

This was awesome! I really liked how it builds up steadily and steadily. It keeps you reading. The descriptions are good too, and make me picture everything in my mind. I particularly liked this passage. It was subtle, beautiful and powerful. I liked this imagery of sharp rocks "whispering": "With every mountain peak, there was another. With each stretch, I reached greater altitudes, and with every stride, I got stronger. I felt the sharp rocks as they whispered to walk lightly." Wow! I would actually like to read more about the adventur...

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Palak Shah
19:32 Aug 09, 2021

Thank you so much Jon; I appreciate this amazing feedback :))

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09:28 Aug 09, 2021

Great job Palak, I loved the story !!!

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Palak Shah
09:30 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks Natasha :))

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06:45 Aug 09, 2021

The flow of the story was incredible, it kept me on the edge till last. Good going

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Palak Shah
09:25 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks Prathamesh :)))

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Daniel R. Hayes
05:35 Aug 09, 2021

Hi Palak! I thought this story was brilliant. I love the creativity here, and the whole story flowed really well. You did a fantastic job with the details and I really enjoyed reading this. Thanks for recommending it. Great job :)

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Palak Shah
09:24 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks Daniel, I am glad that you enjoyed it :))

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Keya J.
04:14 Aug 09, 2021

It is a very nice story. The descriptions are beautifully detailed. Usually, secret nobility, people tend to believe it to be secret goodness in someone. I am happy to see someone interpret the literary meaning. Great Job.

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Palak Shah
09:24 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks, Keya. Oh, that is a very good interpretation of the prompt. I really didn't think of that and took the literal meaning lol :)))

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Keya J.
10:20 Aug 09, 2021

hehe lol....it happens

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Palak Shah
10:24 Aug 09, 2021

:)))))))

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M C
00:02 Aug 09, 2021

Wow! Awesome story, the beginning kept me hooked and made me want to keep reading, I also love your descriptions! I really feel like I am in the story and can clearly see everything! I also love how you based it off of Black Panther and set it in Wakanda! There are a few sentences I had to read a couple times but overall a great story! Great job! :)

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Palak Shah
09:20 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks, Maci, I am glad that you enjoyed it.

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Cathryn V
23:10 Aug 08, 2021

Hi Palak, Interesting story you have. I want some of that vibranium! Maybe watch out for the questions that you ask and immediately answer. It sort of stops the action (IMHO). You might want to change one word in the part below. I thought he wanted to find the vibranium according to the first part below. But then further down it seems that he already has it. Then I understood that he was looking for the source. The immense potential the vibranium holds is astounding. We, as a world, could combat genetic diseases and create a dynasty. Y...

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Palak Shah
09:19 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks, Cathryn, this all makes sense and I will take this into account in my next story and I have also tried to make changes to my current story. Thanks for this amazing feedback :)))

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Cathryn V
15:42 Aug 09, 2021

you’re most welcome!

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Hassan Amhaz
22:45 Aug 08, 2021

i am a marvel fan and this story is a magnificent and amazing one! i really enjoyed it and i'd like to see more like this one! 👑💎

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Palak Shah
09:16 Aug 09, 2021

Thank you so much Hassan :))

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22:41 Aug 08, 2021

Hey, Palak! Sorry it took me so long to get around to reading this… I love this story! You are so creative, and I like the characters. The imagery is so good!! 😁 I think that might be the best part. What a sweet ending!! I love it!! Critiques (these are all just suggestions and you don’t have to listen to them): -“He was trying to kill me but he didn’t and walked away, looking as baffled as I was.“ I feel like this like would be more intriguing if it was written as two sentences. -Also: I noticed in this story you keep switching from pa...

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Palak Shah
09:16 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks for this amazing feedback. Your suggestions are amazing and I have put them into my writing. I will bear all this in mind when writing my next story. I don't know if I should make a part 2 maybe I'll make a part 2 with the brothers and their interaction if I ever get a suitable prompt that is.

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Jasey Lovegood
22:33 Aug 08, 2021

Hey Palak! Loved the MCU story, the way you tied it in with nobility was very clever. Good job! :)

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Palak Shah
09:13 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks you so much Jasey, I really appreciate that :))

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Jasey Lovegood
10:02 Aug 09, 2021

Np! :D

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Eric D.
22:03 Aug 08, 2021

Cool fanfiction!!

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Palak Shah
09:12 Aug 09, 2021

Thanks Eric :)))

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18:02 Aug 08, 2021

Great story! I love Marvel (and superheroes in general) so this was so much fun to read. Really nice ending, too! Nice job, keep up the good work! :D 🐈‍⬛

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Palak Shah
21:19 Aug 08, 2021

Thank you so much for this amazing feedback, I'm glad you liked it :))

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00:00 Aug 09, 2021

No problem! :)))

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16:55 Aug 08, 2021

yassssss such a great ending!! I love marvel and this was a really interesting take on it, and I loved it!!! Great job Palak! A few notes: "But where will I go." -needs a question mark instead of period They know this place as Wakanda; he said. -Maybe use quotation marks there? It will make it even more clear he was talking. "I could feel the vibranium in my veins; my blood pumped with the force of the vibranium in my hand. It was in me." -amazing line, especially "it was in me" "the city grew as a platinum petal into a teal sky" -gr...

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Palak Shah
17:09 Aug 08, 2021

Thanks for the great feedback Lunana, I am also a very big Marvel fan and thanks for the corrections and I have just edited my story with them :)))

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17:10 Aug 08, 2021

yeah! It was really fun to read!

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Palak Shah
17:11 Aug 08, 2021

:))))))))))) I'm glad that you enjoyed it :D

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Johana Htwe
16:36 Aug 08, 2021

Oh My Gosh!! Palak, I am Wakanda fan!! 😍😍 It is like I am watching a movie, a new version of Wakanda, a princess. This will make a perfect movie. You should try writing a book, a real book, about Wakanda!! I just love the story, but I think I want more, like ya know, a fight scene, an action and how she will rule Wakanda. That would be so awesome. Great job writing this story!! 👏👏Let me know if you're going to continue this Wakanda version, please.👃

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Palak Shah
16:42 Aug 08, 2021

Thank you so much, Johana, this comment has just made my day. I really need to check out this movie because I have just based this all on Black Panther lol :)) Yes, I will definitely let you know. Please let me know if you post any story I would love to read it :))

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Johana Htwe
16:46 Aug 08, 2021

I know, I love Black Panther too!!! My fav marvel movie!! You deserve it! Keep going, Palak.😍😍

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Palak Shah
17:02 Aug 08, 2021

Thank you so much. I also love Black Panther.

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Pratik Bhandari
16:22 Aug 08, 2021

Very well written Palak, Keep going !!

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Palak Shah
16:27 Aug 08, 2021

Thank you so much :)))

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14:48 Aug 08, 2021

loved it! <3

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Palak Shah
14:53 Aug 08, 2021

Thank you so much :)))

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Dhwani Jain
12:36 Nov 15, 2021

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Dhwani Jain
03:16 Nov 15, 2021

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Esther :)
18:41 Nov 09, 2021

🍿🍿🍿

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Palak Shah
16:36 Nov 11, 2021

Heyy Esther, how are you doing?

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