Baby Dolls Aren't Always Comparable

Submitted into Contest #70 in response to: Write about someone trying to atone for a mistake they’ll never be able to fix.... view prompt

24 comments

Sad Fiction

Dear Artemis,

When I was a child, we all dreamt of the day we would grow up. Get married. Have children of our own.

We carried baby dolls, so when we were mothers we were prepared. We would be great mothers! Wouldn’t we?

As I grew older, we learned a lot more about the role we were supposed to play in society as women. Get married to a guy, not because of their actual core values, but rather for their monetary value. If you can get the CEO’s son to notice you, great job! Have a million babies and become a meek little housewife.

But around the same time, I found Greek mythology. The stories of heroes and gods were so enchanting, I found myself wanting to go back in time. Of course, women had even less rights back then. Women weren’t even allowed to go to the agora, or the marketplace.

I frequently got lost in daydreams of hunting with a bow and arrow in the woods. Being the child of someone important, instead of the child of an absentee father and a woman who worked three jobs to provide for the two of us.

My grades started to dip. B pluses turned to D’s and F’s. I was a failure. The only thing I was good at was reading.

I started working at age fourteen. Whatever could bring in money for me and my mother. McDonald's cashier, singing at local restaurants, anything that would take a fourteen year old in to work.

It turned out that I was actually a good singer. An agent, Mr. O’Leary, heard me singing one night.

β€œLuna, you have the voice of an angel.”

He offered to find me a vocal coach, and when I refrained, he told me money didn’t matter. He would personally pay for it if he had to.

I was so touched by his kindness, I accepted his offer.

After many months of learning in between jobs, I took to the stage to sing again, and this time an agent for many of music’s biggest stars was in the audience. He confronted me as I was leaving, and said my voice was great.

I thanked him and attempted to get on my way. I had a job to be at in fifteen minutes.Β 

He grabbed my shoulders. β€œLuna, do you understand what I’m saying? Fame! Fortune! It could all be yours. You could leave this behind!” He waved his hand around the restaurant. β€œYou could be famous!”

As a girl who was nothing, who came from nothing, I caved into temptation. Before I knew it, I was at a recording studio, performing songs.

I wasn’t Luna Grey, small town nobody anymore. I was Luna Grey, superstar. I didn’t know who this new me was. But the public, my fans liked it, so I kept it. Everyday, I would put on makeup and delve into a world that was so bright and colorful it left my head spinning.

Then my mom died. I had left her, and she drank herself to death.Β 

I will never be able to forget this. I will never be able to live this down.

I rushed back to my small town for her funeral.Β 

After, I really wasn’t the same.

My childhood was touring the country, singing. More than ever, I wanted to escape into the world of Greek mythology.

Three years later, in Wichita, Kansas, I met a man who forever changed my life. Your father.Β 

He had green eyes, and hair the color of a shimmering wheat field. He was sitting in the third row of one of my concerts, but I could've picked him out of a crowd. He seemed to glow like that.

I left Kansas, but he followed suit. He lived in his car, following me around on the road.

Nine months later, I had you.

I named you after Artemis, the Greek goddess of the moon and the hunt. Artemis was always my favorite goddess, and I wanted to pass that on to you.

At the same time, I was eighteen years old. I had a baby. And a tour.

My manager gave me an ultimatum. My baby or my fame.

I made the worst mistake of my life. I chose my fame.

I gave you and your father up. I continued my tour. I told myself it would be fine. You guys would be fine.

When I was little, we had dreamed about having children. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was giving up my dream. Giving up my life.

We had thought we would be good mothers. When I gave you up, I lost a part of me. I lost more of me saying goodbye to you than saying a final goodbye to my mother.

I became racked with guilt. I was eighteen, and I had already lost all of my family. Those baby dolls taught me nothing about motherhood. Taking care of a plastic person is so much easier than taking care of a real one.

Plastic ones may not cry. They may not demand food or attention. They do not mind if you drop them in mud or dent their little heads.

But real babies give you a sense of hope. They make you feel needed. Their unconditional love for you is so pure. Their first words are priceless.

Artemis, I will never be able to fix this. I was not there for your first words. I was not there to give you my love or receive yours. I was not there to be needed by you.

I’m sorry.

I sit here on my deathbed writing this. I hope it reaches you, a first and last letter from your real mother.Β 

I could not deal with my grief and stress. There is no way to go around it, I will meet the same fate as my mother. I dealt with my fear and guilt by drowning it in a bottle of alcohol. And now I will die.

I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you, Artemis. I should have been. It is unforgivable.

I will never be able to fix this, and I will take this guilt with me to death.

Your mother,

Luna Grey

December 02, 2020 00:05

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24 comments

THIS STORY DIDNT GET APPROVED AND I AM LESS THAN PLEASED ABOUT IT. (If it does get approved I will remove this, I am sorry to everyone for being such a sore loser.)

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Ximena Chavez
13:48 Dec 09, 2020

I for one thought that you're story was beautiful. It was well composed and had such emotion to it. I'm not so sure as to why it wasn't approved, but if it does, you sure deserve it! I don't think my first story will get approved either. I'm not even sure anyone has even read it. Would you be kind enough to read it and give me some feedback? I would be so grateful for that. The title of the story is "Boogeyman".

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Radhika Diksha
16:42 Dec 03, 2020

it was so good and full of emotions. The story had heartfelt lines. Loved it. I think the story can win. If you have time do read my story "A shade apart" and give your feedback on it.

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Yolanda Wu
01:48 Dec 03, 2020

Wow, what a heartfelt story! You wrote those words real and raw, and I got sucked into it right away. I see you're also a fan of Greek mythology, which is fantastic! I love how this whole story is Luna's letter to her daughter. The way you wrote how she changed and evolved, became someone she wasn't because of fame. It was so beautiful how you linked the playing with dolls and dreaming of motherhood to what she gave up in the end. Fantastic story. Amazing work, Carolina!

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Magarette Daya
00:27 Dec 17, 2020

The storyline was really well put and it had a very real feeling to it. You are a very good writer and I hope you continue because your stories are very interesting. Keep writing!

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Magarette Daya
16:57 Jan 04, 2021

You are welcome!

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Mira Caplan
03:25 Dec 05, 2020

Wow. I am seriously impressed. First of all, I LOVE Greek Mythology. I also love the whole concept of it being a letter, as Yolanda Wu said below. This story was SO well written, and I could feel my heart breaking at the end. Really, really good job. (Also, it was Apollo that she noticed, correct? I love how she named their daughter Artemis- it just tied the whole story together, beginning to end.)

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Thank you so much! I'm so glad you enjoyed it. (It's actually just a regular mortal guy, but I see how you could think that ;) )

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Mira Caplan
15:22 Dec 05, 2020

Ah, got it. (It was the blonde hair and the fact that she was preforming when she noticed him.) :)

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21:39 Dec 02, 2020

THIS WAS POSITIVELY INCREDIAWESOMAZING!!!!!!!! I loved it so much, and the emotion that you put in your writing, but maybe include language that connects it to the purpose: A letter to a daughter from her biological mother. AMAZINGGGG. I put you in my story of the week in my bio!!

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04:17 Apr 30, 2021

Wow amazing story! (Like always) Your writting style is so pleasent and beautiful to read. It isn't bogged down with tons of fancy words and is short, simple and sweet. I like reading styles like that. The story was beautiful also and it captured alot of emotion. You showed people what this young womans life was like and her downfall from pain when she gave up her bady for fame. I just loved it. Great job!!!!!!!!!

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Coco Longstaff
00:02 Feb 07, 2021

πŸ§ƒ

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Kate Reynolds
19:33 Dec 09, 2020

OMG THIS WAS SO SADDDDDDD. I loved how you formatted it as a letter, which describes Artemis' mom's life. Good job!!

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Kate Reynolds
19:44 Dec 09, 2020

You're welcome! :D

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