Demetria’s Tale

Submitted into Contest #83 in response to: Write a fantasy story about water gods or spirits.... view prompt

154 comments

Fantasy Inspirational

The morning breeze touches my face with the caressing stroke of a mother. My golden hair floats, lifted by the gale falling from the mountain Annaliese high above our camp. Above the highest peak, the wind sweeps down the rock faces until the mist shrouds it entirely. The great Annaliese shines above us all...


The mountain seems to shift with the wind, swaying this way and that as if it were not solid and unmoving. I always smell the sun on her stony depths, feel the pull down to the center of the Earth. Her sister, the river Galatea, dances through the oak trees that stick out from the damp topsoil. Her wiles draw me closer to the edge every day, bring me to the brink of jumping in.


"Come, Demetria," Galatea called to the light of my soul. "There is nothing for you here, I will take you away."


Each day I turn away in sorrow, yearning to be one with the river and mountain, one with the sisters of beauty. They call to me in turn every day... every day...

**

It was a bright dew that touched the prickles of grass. I had awoken in a feverish sweat, thinking not of my people or my obligations but of my sisters, my beguilers, the lovely spirits... I knew that I would have to restrain myself for the day, but that didn't make it easier upon my aching heart.


The mortar that held the logs of my house together was creaking in the light of morning and the cold seeped in through the holes. Shifting morning air tickled my arm as I forced myself to a sitting position.


"Why do you stay, Demetria? They do not value you..." Annaliese called through the cloud of my morning-head. Like the sun, or rather like rain, it penetrated the thick silence that lay in a blanket over my nerves. Still, I silenced the call as I did each day, dressing my bare ankles in sheepskin.


"Thrall, where are ye?" The gruff voice of my master echoed through the camp of warriors. I threw on my clothing as best I could, rushing to the door.


"Your Strength, I have awoken." My head bowed like a swan's delicate curve, staring at the leather-bound feet of Bragi Borg. He was quite tall for his stout name, but he made up for it in fat. Jiggling jugs of skin cascaded off of his hips and legs, flapping a little as he walked. My Master was a man with a short temper, so I did my very best to follow his orders.


My face held taut as he leaned over and breathed down my neck. Smells of tobacco and barley drifted from his unkempt mustache.


"Awoken, are ye? Well, you left me awoken with nay a spot o' breakfast for some time..." He rounded his Os to the point of babbling, where I had to strain to decipher what he was saying. Bragi was an impatient man, so there was no option of not listening.


"Ye know why yer here?"


"Why, Your Strength." I always replied in a bland manner, never letting any emotion seep in.


"To make me breakfast!" With a whirl his hand connected with the side of my nose and I reeled back in surprise. The pain... it pressed deep into my bones like a branding iron. I showed no emotion, a face of stone was all that he saw as he shoved me towards the stove.


"Make breakfast. Ye wanna keep yer pretty face, don't ye?" His words threatened and taunted, daring me to defy. I stood still as ever, remembering what happened to those who disobeyed the warriors.


"Sethe, what happened?"


"Not now, stupid girl. Go to yer cabin."


"Why? What's happened?"


"Go now if ye wanna live."


"SETHE?!" The harsh voice of the warriors resounded through the huts as I ran to close the door to mine. There was pounding and grunts and screams all through the night, and I sobbed behind my oaken door. The poor old thrall never spoke again.


All through the next month I heard her oaths and curses at the warriors like a faulty loop in my brain. All through the month I reached to the table where water would lay filled in a bucket every morning to find the bucket empty and abandoned.


The only girl left in the camp, they poked and prodded at my chores every chance they could get. Spear butts would knock over cups of ale that the foul beasts knew I had to clean up. All through the next year, there was no happiness but in the cold embraces of the mountain and river, of my sisters of nature.


"Come, Demetria, let us hold you..." The warmth of the stone and water would melt my sunken heart and fill it with grit. It was thanks to the sisters that I survived...


"MAKE THE BREAKFAST!" I rushed back to work as my dream faded away in the pale light of day. The warriors would be out hunting soon, running to catch a deer or two. I would run to the crossing of the water and rock, hug the mountain with my two scratched bare hands.


My fingers shook as I placed the whale blubber onto the cast-iron pan. I brushed up against the scorching metal on the side and gasped in horror at the red bumps that rose from the flames.


The meat that the warriors brought in each day was warm and roughed up, ravaged by the berserk slashes and stabs. I would wash it in the river until all of the blood had escaped it. Galatea received the spirit of the poor animal, drifting it away to the horizon as I watched. Whenever I placed the skin on the pan, there is no fight left in the sallow bones. There is no life. I cannot help but be glad for it to have left the horrid world in which I must still live.


There was silence all throughout the camp after I fed the savages their morning grits. No laughing or growling or fighting or yelling or stomping or rustling... silence. There was nothing but me and my memories and my sisters.


I ran to the spot where river met mountain, sibling met sibling, and stopped to catch my breath. Air sped in and out of my heaving lungs, and mist felt its way into my nose as I inhaled. Galatea and Annaliese gave the air I breathed a blessing, in a way, and I enjoyed every gulp of it.


"Demetria, you must leave them... stay with us..." The entreaties of the sisters warmed my heart as I listened in harmony with the flitting of the water.


There was a peace that came over me when I sat amidst the cascading folds of rock and water. I could only realize the stunning beauty of the world around me when I could no longer realize the ugly. When I rested at the shore of the river, I could feel myself and the echoes of my spirit in everything around... from my smile in the river to my heartbeat in the depths of the rocky peak. Galatea and Annaliese were here, and so was I, and so I was.


"Sisters... why must the world be this way?" There was only silence as I stretched out for an answer. I didn't expect any to come; After all, they knew naught the terrors of my world as I did... but one can hope.


The sun began to pierce itself on Annaliese's peak as I sunk down to dusk. I admired the washes of crimson that fell from the canopy of the trees and their shadows. They caught the golden whispers in my long, wavy hair.


"THRALL!" A wave of perfect terror crashed upon me. There was a storm of panic as I ran back to camp. They would hurt me... they would punish me... how could I have been so careless? Even after what happened to Sethe I was careless... I didn't think.


"YOU. Get over here. Now." I trembled in terror as Bragi and his folk crowded around me. Stone face, Demetria, stone and nothing more.

**

"What ar we going to do with theh body?" Mirkin, the thin, wiry archer of the company, said. He sauntered over to Demetria's feet and took out his knife with a great flourish. With a grunt, not caring for neatness, he sawed off the big toe on her right foot. "What? Makes fer good bait." The others scoffed at him.


"Everyone take a toe for bait, then throw 'er in the river." Bragi swung his large axe over his head and severed Demetria's foot from the bone. With a ghastly flourish, he threw it to the company and hauled her over his shoulder.


Upon reaching the river, he saw the waters churning in a darker fashion than ever before. Bragi paid it no mind and threw Demetria deep into the depths with a cold sigh.


"Where'r we going to find a thrall now?" He shook his head in disdain and took a swig of brandy. He had dropped his guard and turned to leave when a slab of rock impaled the ground before him.


"The hell?" As he turned to go around it, more began to fall from the sky, seeming to rain upon him like hail. They formed a pyramid over him and he shouted to his companions, seeing if they would hear him through the walls of rock. To no avail.


A wave rushed over the rock pyramid and swept it down into the depths, sinking Bragi far away from any hope of rescue.


The sisters Galatea and Annaliese smiled within their walls of stone and water, smiled to each other for the sister they avenged.

February 26, 2021 16:58

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154 comments

Laiba M
22:33 Feb 26, 2021

Hi, Luke!! Happy belated birthday! I was busy and wasn't able to wish you one yesterday, sorry about that T-T How did your birthday go?

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22:49 Feb 26, 2021

Thanks so much Laiba!!! It went great!!! I went on a bookshop run and bought two short story collections, one Alice Munro and one Haruki Murakami, the first book of Mistborn, an 1840 edition of Isaac D'Israeli's essays on literature which is SO DARN PURTY, the first two books of Remembrance of things past, and a Dostoevsky short works book. Then I had triple choc cake!!!

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Laiba M
23:38 Feb 26, 2021

Of course!!! That sounds SO fun especially considering your Reedsy name :D Amazing talented author/book choices!!! And chocolate cake is one of my favorites!!! I'm so glad you had a great day!! Bookshop sprees sound so funnn T-T I can't wait to go to one after it gets safer in my area!!!

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00:39 Feb 27, 2021

Awwwwww thanks!!!! Yeshhhhhhh chocolate cake is sooooo good!!!! Bookshops are so amazing! Yerp Litlover XD

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Laiba M
01:48 Feb 27, 2021

I agree with everything you said!!!! :) Random question, do you like the smell of new books or old books better?

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14:14 Feb 27, 2021

Old bookssssss definitely!!!

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Jasey Lovegood
22:31 Feb 26, 2021

OML THIS. HOW LUKE- Okay, I absolutely adored this story, it had this crazy medieval and fantasy vibe to it, and I loved the use of Old English, it really boosted the 'yE oLd vIbE'. Each character seemed to have an aura surrounded by power and mystery, and the plotline was really engaging. Is this the story that you need help with the title? I think I have some ideas... KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK, MY FRIEND! :)

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22:47 Feb 26, 2021

THANKS YOU SO MUCH!!!!!! Yerp I need a better title!! Thanks you so much!!!! again thanks you so much!!!! and one more time: thanks you so much!!!!

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Jasey Lovegood
22:54 Feb 26, 2021

No problem! So, the ideas I had for your story title were: - Annaliese, Galatea and Demetria - To Be With the Sisters of Nature - Stay With Us, Demetria - The Avenged Sister I might think of more later, hopefully you like them! :)

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22:55 Feb 26, 2021

Oooooh I love the fourth!!!

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Jasey Lovegood
22:55 Feb 26, 2021

Awesome! I can't believe ur actually using smth I thought of **faints**

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23:00 Feb 26, 2021

XD Of course I am!!!! Its a great one!!!

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Kate Reynolds
20:46 Feb 26, 2021

This is your best story I've read HANDS DOWN. WOW. THOSE DETAILS, THE TONE AND JUST EVERYTHING!!!!!! (Btw sooo sorry this is so late, I forgot to comment on your story XD)

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21:43 Feb 26, 2021

THANKS YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!

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Kate Reynolds
17:04 Feb 27, 2021

OFCCCCCC!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Dorsa S.
19:19 Feb 26, 2021

"He rounded his Os to the point of babbling, where I had to strain to decipher what he was saying. Bragi was an impatient man, so there was no option of not listening." I LOVE THIS- this is truly a magical story and it is definitely perfect for this writing prompt. it is definitely yours and it is spectacular. gosh, fantasy hits a sweet spot. like you can make anything when writing in a fantasy genre! :)

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19:22 Feb 26, 2021

Thanks you so much Dorsa!!! I knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww thank you so muchhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

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Whitney Jones
17:32 Feb 26, 2021

You should use exclamation marks to put more excitement, anger, feeling to it. It was just kill* * I don't mean literally. I mean it would be killler!!!!

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17:32 Feb 26, 2021

Aw Thankooooo!!! I wanted to make it kinda fable-y, but I guess so. :DDDDD

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17:22 Feb 26, 2021

As usual, I was NOT expecting this. You always surprise me. Ofc, I was expecting it to be amazing, but WOW. The emotion, the characters, the EVERYTHING, really went above me expectation. I loved it. This story is probably the best out all of the ones you've written, ngl :) Minor errors: "'Why, Your Strength.'" --> "'Why, Your Strength?'" "[...] running to catch a dear or two." --> a deer or two. I'm being so annoying I comment on little errors all of the time XD This was unique and incredible. Great great job!!! :DD

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17:23 Feb 26, 2021

Thank you so much!!!!!!! This was so fun to writeeeeeee!!!! For the first minor error, I was trying to show how stone-faced and unemotional she was acting, but for the second one OOF

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03:46 Feb 27, 2021

(sorry I took so long to respond lol) Your welcome! Ohhhh that makes sense XD And hey, everyone makes mistakes :) New story out btw!!!

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14:18 Feb 27, 2021

I CHECK IT OUT!!!

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14:21 Feb 27, 2021

Thank you!!! :)

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Sia S
10:51 Feb 28, 2021

I'm a zombie now ;) new one

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13:43 Feb 28, 2021

XDXD

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Danny -
05:51 Feb 28, 2021

Ohh, you changed the title, the new one really gives a better theme of the story (?) and I loooooove it! :)) As for the story, it's amazing! best thing you've ever written, but then every time you post a new story it's always better than the last one aaaaand I can't exaggerate this enough; all your stories catch me off-guard every. single. time! Ahhhhh im cryingg, this is toooooo good, hmmm, too good to be true...are you some undercover author or something, maybee a witch-y author, hehhe weird voodoo stuff.. Also, how do you pronounce Ann...

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13:45 Feb 28, 2021

Yeah, I thought so!!! Thank you so much!!! I did a bit too much description, but yeah... XDXDXD Nope just me!!! Ah, well Annaliese isn't common, but Liese rhymes with knees, and Anna is like Mana.

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Danny -
13:48 Feb 28, 2021

yeah lol, it happens sometimes XD Of course :)) Ohh alright, thanks, I just thought it was a nice name XD

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18:09 Feb 28, 2021

Lollllllllll thank you!!!!

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Danny -
22:59 Feb 28, 2021

Lol no problem XD

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17:06 Feb 26, 2021

ALSO ANY BETTER TITLE IDEAS?

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17:23 Feb 26, 2021

I honestly have no idea XD I recommend asking Jasey Lovegood. She always has great titles and I'm sure she can think of something :)

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17:23 Feb 26, 2021

OOOh I will!!!

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17:28 Feb 26, 2021

:)

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17:29 Feb 26, 2021

:)))))

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17:06 Feb 26, 2021

...w-wow I dont know what to say this was amazinggggg how are you so good at writing poetic intro paragraph thigsss???? this was filled with rich emotion and jhgfjkdj i dont even know what else I'm at a loss for words amazing story Luke!!:)

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17:07 Feb 26, 2021

Thank you so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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17:08 Feb 26, 2021

:DD

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00:41 Feb 27, 2021

You flatter me lol

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00:42 Feb 27, 2021

XD:D

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