Story Time

“Kung Pao” by Story Time

Claudia approached me holding a box of kung pao chicken. “Since when do I eat kung pao chicken,” I asked, holding a salad from Bernfield’s and an umbrella to shield my new hairdo from the rain. Claudia lightly scooped her arm through mine with a kind of grace the version of myself I currently am has none of whatsoever, and she guided me into an alley behind a lingerie store. “You need to quit your job,” Other Claudia informed me, as though she were telling me to find a new dentist or replace one of the lightbulbs in my many lava lamps....

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“Sancho Panza's Last Dance” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #195

I return to avenge my friend in the shadow of a windmill. Charging at it on my trusty steed, I cry a warrior’s cry. “No hay viento en el infierno!” The windmill will not budge. It only turns. I pull back on the reins. My horse makes not a sound. There is no sound to make. It would be captured by the wind. My horse is not a horse. She is a giant caterpillar. She is not a butterfly, but her name is Luna. Luna Panza, my only living friend. All others are ghosts. Ghosts that search the Heavens for my face. “Sigo vivo y no se porque...

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“Frankel and Kelso at the Track” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #194

“Why did you tell him you’d eat your hat?”“Those were the terms. Joseph Macabee comes in less than third, and I eat my hat.”“But it’s such a nice hat, Frankel.”“I know, Kelso, but those were the terms. You know how these guys are.”“A horse only ever owns two or three nice hats in his life.”“I got at least six good hats back at the stable.”“I’ve never seen six good hats in your stall.”“Well, you shouldn’t be looking around my stall anyway. Mind your business.”“I’m not trying to look around. I just notice how it looks when I come to pick you u...

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“Well Enough Alone” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #193

Frieda Frasier stirred her tea as her little sister tried solving her murder. “But we know that she went to the convenience store after stopping to get money out of the ATM. If there’s one thing I can tell you about Frieda, it’s that she NEVER went to convenience stores.” Frieda went to convenience stores all the time. Who didn’t? What person was able to avoid going to convenience stores? Where else would somebody buy gum or a scratch ticket or those shareable size bags of Peanut M&M’s? The cat jumped up on her lap and she tenderly...

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“Bobsy's Treasure” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #192

Larry, so help me God, if you come near me right now, I am going to scream so loud, it’ll shatter every window in this godless convention center. I am so mad. I am so mad I could eat salami, and you know how I feel about salami. I could take one of those big rolls of salami and tear into it like a magpie. That’s how mad I am. I don’t even know what a magpie is. I’ve lost all my knowledge in this moment of my rage and fury. I am nothing but anger at this point, Larry. Nothing but irritation. Imagine me taking Bobsy’s treasure here and t...

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“A Beer Day for Lilies” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #191

Every time we went for lilies, a letter would disappear.“Ptr tlls m that us that w can’t lav lttrs bhnd whn w go to the flowr shop,” we would say to each other, “H says h knows it’s an honest mistak, but nvrthlss.”Peter is our uncle. Our GREAT-uncle, although not really, because a Great-Uncle is a real thing and not just an uncle you think is great. Peter seems like more than an uncle to us. He’s actually more like a father when you get right down to it. Our Father is lovely, but he’s not around very often and he doesn’t take us on outings. ...

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“Demeter” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #190

Mother, I just know you’ll love him once you get to know him. Sulfur. My daughter smells of sulfur. Great fires have burned around her. I know this and I know to keep my mouth shut. I clutch my clutch. I avoid biting down on my lip, because I fear getting lipstick on my teeth. Howser should have come with me, but New York City is no place for a dog that wasn’t born here. That wasn’t born smelling the skyscrapers and inhaling constantly the fragrance of streetside hot dogs. Mother, don’t be too hard on him. He’s misunderstood the way all ...

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“Owen in October” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #189

I had always found Saturday afternoons to be the hardest. Sunday afternoons were for cleaning and Saturday nights were for going out. Sunday nights you unwind and Friday nights you can grab a drink with a friend or see a movie. The Saturday afternoons were what got me. I never knew what to do with them once I was alone. Two days into October, and it felt as though there would be jack-o-lanterns decorating every door until the end of time itself. Kids ran by me in the drugstore to see what they could convince their parents to buy them f...

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“The Chipmunk” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #188

Harriet Bowson would have had the perfect yard if it hadn’t been for the chipmunk.She had taken great pains in creating a wonderland for nature. Native plants and flowers sprouted throughout her little, fenced-in paradise. Consultants had been brought in when she first purchased the house to advise her on how to construct a sanctuary for both herself and whatever miniature wildlife might grace her with their presence.As the yard was taking shape, she found herself dreaming of butterflies. Monarchs and swallowtails, luna moths and red admiral...

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“Lotus Decrees” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #187

I see you all here begging at the foot of our Great Lotus. Lotus, Goddess of Fresh Fish from the Sea. Lotus, Goddess of Comfort on a Cold Night. Lotus, Goddess of the Hunt When the Hunt Involves Rather Small Animals Such as Mice or Things That Look Like Mice. I see you all here, but only on the Feast Day of Lotus. Only on this, the day of her birth, the day when all come to worship. But where are you the rest of the days? Where are you when Lotus fills up her defecation box and it must be changed? Where are you when her hair is matte...

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“Search Results for an Unhappy Marriage” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #186

Where did I leave my keys?Where do people usually leave keys?How often does a woman in her mid-to-late forties lose her kids?Keys not kidsHow often does a woman in her early-to-mid-to-late forties lose her keys?Is losing your keys a sign of dementia?DEMENTIA HOME REMEDY CURES NO WESTERN MEDICINEWhat is a romantic dinner you can make for your 20th wedding anniversary?What is a romantic dinner with ingredients that cost less than $60?What is a romantic dinner with ingredients that cost less than $70?What are cheap restaurants near me that have...

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“Magford's Gold” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #185

And lo they did come These so-called friends Of your good dragon, Magford Who never did bother a soul Now, did he? ‘A Dublin dragon!’ They all said When I first did appear Out of a November storm Wings never furling Fire through my teeth And down below The ministers and the holy people Cliffmongers to the village Of this and that Looking up at me With their bad breath And their fishy eyes exclaiming-- ‘Whomsoever heard Of a Dublin dragon?’ This was back When Dublin was a village And I could make my way As I saw fit Diving down to san...

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“Goats, Arrive” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #184

He threw his phone away on a Tuesday. By Thursday, he was crossing the second bridge leading into Delle Faire. The first bridge would bring you to a little island in-between the mainland and the big island. The little island was called Marco’s River even though there was no river, but there was a small town, and Scott could just have easily bought a house there and been a little closer to his old life. He could have done a lot of things that would have looked like half-stepping. He could have kept his phone. He could have left his social...

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“The Tango of the Sun” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #183

The light entered the room before I did. A cavernous elegance to a spot unclaimed by dream’s worst reckoning. I hear the sound of my shoes as they touch the marble beneath them. Marble flooring and shiny blue shoes. I have a tuxedo fitted for me by Venus herself. She made me promise not to stain it with burgundy wine. The lapels were soft cerulean demigod dust that she’d gathered from her favorite myths. Venus was the only entity I knew who could dance through narratives at will. She was the one who told me about the ballroom. She was t...

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“Invasion” by Story Time

Submitted to Contest #182

The one night I set the alarm, they show up. I think there are three. Three would be a good number. There are always three burglars in the movies. The smart one, the muscle, and the one who panics and dies at the hand of the protagonist--sometimes by happy accident. I shouldn’t project. I shouldn’t start all this by projecting. I’m bound to let myself down if I do that. They might run now that the alarm has been sounded. They might flee. I would flee if I were them. No point in dealing with the hassle of an alarm. Back when I was at the top...

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