Frost

A blizzard lightly stormed through 

As I tiptoed down the glass, clear tiled floor 

And into his arms 

It is Thursday January 21 of the 21st Century and my husband is after me 

To kill me (in my sleep, behind my back, worse not at all)

To live this world with me (*sighhh of a puss and boots eyed girl in love*) 

- who knows 

Last we seen each other : as I recall in my memory diary (; : 

9 months ago

Conception

Marriage 

I awoke two days later by the whispers of a full moon *Now realizing indeed it was a full moon*

Whispers that felt like a cool breeze , some type of retrograde through the electric current. 

Electric visions of a gorgeous night 

Bits and pieces of a scrambled time-line puzzle of our marriage taking place 

A visionary current I was never granted in such short notice ever before 

Had it not been for the moon that night

I may have never known I was pregnant having not remembered what we shared together two nights prior

A fiesta, his surprise presence let alone a proposal and then the classical, pop up “shotgun” of an eloped wedding. ( I think it even all happened in five minutes)

He surprised me.

Showed up out of the blue and romanced me away

What a guy huh

If it wasn’t for him the empty spot of alone wouldn’t have changed - only for him

If it wasn’t for the moon the emptiness of not remembering would have lingered 

The feeling of completeness as we play our I do’s in a cloud we admired on our first date 

The feeling of completeness as I rewind the magic of our night 

But I still woke up without it 

And that’s why I had to go - one last time

Following the moon when the calls came

To the end of the world 

To a lost cabin in one of those gorgeous Thomas Kinkaid paintings. 

Think of me as a Henry David Thoreau. Like Walden 

In the middle of nowhere at the ends of the earth

The only woman these animals to know

Practically the only two people on earth and I was alone with them - the animals

The open grassland and trees

I couldn’t go back and I’m afraid that is why he’s after me

Memory, I can’t go back to or get back 

Like a black liver on a good night 

We can’t ever go back 

Just like those mad enough to search for the existence of black hole, an elixir 

Time Travel! 

Configure the loophole of the catacombs hell

That’s what the fires tail sometimes when I’m looking at it deep in trance

How stuck we aren’t

Now once again I am trapped -alone

No electricity

No internet

No phone service 

Just an open window to the greenest outdoors in the middle of summer

In an old cold cabin the floors tile as cold as cement 

A sweet breeze would chill the spine 

I stayed for nine months

Days full of search for food, water and the warmth away from the outside's dreary hot days. 

Sung with the birds and sipped water with the trees off of their leaves 

No water tap or even a stove to control heat 

No body baths or mid day naps 

One day the winds trickled through the window and moved the moist sweat from the high hot ceilings into the cold cabin air- falling and freezing

I laid on the cool floor, full of leaves for warmth, that day staring into the vast ceiling of nothingness

I could have sworn it was snowing

Feeling the hot winds, watching as they shook off the drips of humidity, dropping into Antarctica as balls of snow dust disappeared 

Like glitter of the starry nights

Nine months

At night I tucked-in warm inside 

During the day I froze indoors as the heat gorged the outside

This day the storms above trembled the grounds below 

A crumbling like the sound of someone crunching some type of paper through the telephone- to make the person on the other side- believe they have bad reception and therefore can’t hear

Sharp bolts lit the skies, seconds apart 

Listening in for the next to peacefully hit

Storms of rain and clouds of glory 

A blizzard stormed through the window and 

(Fake Braxton-Hicks contractions)

...And there he was standing at the end of a hallway

This hallway , out the door and down the wooded tile floor 

Ready to be rid of anything that I was

Kill me off of a past and clear a way of future 

He killed me 

He killed me w his undying love and shot bows in a heart filled kiss

I tiptoed down the iced floor

Tip toed eagerly into him as he caresses and dips me to my side to lift and hold me in his arms 

Carrying me romantically through and out of the threshold 

Stepping into the crisp field of flowers and green 

Our new beginning

January 22nd 2021 8:40pm

It’s Friday night and the rains have just cleared 

I hear there’s snow in the mountains 

We’re going skiing 

I think my husbands going to kill me 

I repeat:

This day the storms above trembled the grounds below 

A crumbling like the sound of someone crunching some type of paper through the telephone- to make the person on the other side- believe they have bad reception and therefore can’t hear

Sharp bolts lit the skies, seconds apart 

Listening in for the next to peacefully hit

Storms of rain and clouds of glory 

A blizzard stormed through the window and 

(Fake Braxton-Hicks contractions)

...And there he was standing at the end of a hallway

This hallway , out the door and down the wooded tile floor 

Ready to be rid of anything that I was

Kill me off of a past and clear a way of future 

He killed me 

He killed me w his undying love and shot bows in a heart filled kiss

I tiptoed down the iced floor

Tip toed eagerly into him as he caresses and dips me to my side to lift and hold me in his arms 

Carrying me romantically through and out of the threshold 

Stepping into the crisp field of flowers and green 

Our new beginning

January 22nd 2021 8:40pm

It’s Friday night and the rains have just cleared 

I hear there’s snow in the mountains 

were headed for the slopes

I'm still Pregnant

P.s

I think my husbands going to kill me