10secs Of Countdown!

Submitted into Contest #74 in response to: Write a story that takes place across ten seconds.... view prompt

5 comments

Thriller Adventure Mystery

Preface: This story is about a young teenage girl named Claire Jossen and her friend Annie Willis. Claire has a passion for spying and wants to be a detective. Her extraordinary intelligence and keen observation caught the eye of her aunt Floren, who is a police woman. Floren encourages her and helps her on her way to become a detective. And Annie is her childhood best friend. She doesn't want Claire to solve dangerous cases alone so she decided to be her assistant. She takes care of her and helps her with her investigation. They had solved a few cases by themselves and it has been widely popularized by the newspaper editors. This is a story of a dangerous incident that happened in their life where they met death so closely!

Hope you enjoy it ;)

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"Cling cling cling!" My phone started ringing in the first hour of morning. "Who on earth is calling me now!?" I thought. I didn't feel like picking the phone as I was feeling very sleepy but it kept on ringing until I was forced to pull out my hand from the blanket and pick up the phone from the side-table. "Hello!?" I said as I clicked the answer button without even seeing the contact name. "Is this Claire Jossen? The so-called young detective?" a deep voice replied from the other side. "Yes? How may I help you?" I asked as I felt a shiver run down my spine, I didn't knew why. "We don't need any help young fella, but your friend Annie might. If you wanna save her, then come to the address I am telling you at 10pm sharp. It's 36 Rosevegan's street Block D Aleen park. And remember don't dare tell the police, else you shall loose your friend forever" the caller said. I could feel sweat running down my forehead even in the middle of winter. I immediately got off my bed, pulled my coat from the hanger, tied a bun somehow, grabbed my car keys and went to Floren's house. She was surprised to see me so early in the morning. "Anything wrong?" she asked. "Yes, let's go in first." I said as I hurriedly closed the door. "Floren!" I cried. " Calm down dear...Tell me what's wrong?" She consoled me. "An-Annie! Sh-She's kidnapped!" I broke down. "I recieved a call in the morning from someone and he told me that if I want to save Annie I have to go to the mentioned address tonight 10pm." "Oh my! I should then raid that place right now" she said. "NO!" I screamed. "He told me not to inform the police. So he will definately be alert from beforehand. They might kill Annie! They surely are some criminals who doesn't want me and Annie to expose them. That's why they're doing all this. But how do I save Annie. I'm feeling so helpless."

"Don't cry Claire. Pls don't. The first day you stepped into this job, I told you it's not safe. But I believe that no-one can harm people who risk their own lives for other's good like you both. Don't worry, everything's gonna be fine."

I calmed down and regained strength by her words. "They messed with my friend, so now they'll pay" I said. "Floren listen. You be ready with the force. I'll call or sms you as soon as I get the opportunity. I'll send you the location."

"Be careful Claire..." Floren said as I left her house making further plans.

It was 9:55pm. I had almost reached Aleen Park. I asked my driver to drop me there and wait. I walked to Aleen park myself. It was a very easy location to find. It was dark and cold. I started looking around when suddenly a car drove at full speed and parked up near the gate of the park. I tried my best to stay calm, though my heart was beating faster than the speed of the car. A man wearing a black suit, black hat, dark black glasses and a black mask walked up to me and said, "Come with me". I had no choice. I had to follow this mysterious man who I knew, was upto no good. He took me to the car and almost pushed me in. I was stiff like a statue. The car drove for sometime and I was getting impatient and nervous. I finally picked up the courage to speak. "Who are you and what do you want? And where is Annie?" I firmly asked. "You are brave I gotta admit. No-one else would be able to speak in this condition. Well I'm sorry because your bravery will be of no use now as you'll also end up like Annie soon" he said. "Wait wh- aah!" I screamed as I felt a someone hit hard on my back shoulder.

I opened my eyes to find myself in a dimly-lit room, my hands and legs tied. I tried to set myself free when I heard a voice beside me, "It's of no use Claire." "Annie!" I exclaimed. "They kidnapped me yesterday night" Annie sighed. "But why?" I asked. "I heard what I shouldn't. I was coming from the store when I passed a man speaking with someone on the phone. There was no one else there on the street. I was coming from behind when I accidentally heard him say, 'Yes boss I'm done. He's finished, out of this world now' I couldn't move after hearing that. My legs had turned into stones. After a moment I realised I should run and it's not safe there but it was too late. The man turned around and saw me. I ran as fast as I could but he blocked my way with his car and caught me before I could run back. And then I ended up here. But it wasn't the end. They recognised me as our pictures were published in the newspapers and got your number from my phone and called you. They knew that you'll find me no matter what, so they decided to kidnap you too and kill both of us." I didn't know what to say when suddenly the door slammed open and a man entered. "Well..Well...Well! Look who's here." he said. "I recognise your voice! You're the one who called me" I said. "Oo yes it's me. So sad, looks like the game is over." he said pulling out a revolver from his pocket. "Whom do I kill first, hmm... inky pinky ponky, oo it's Claire!" He aimed the revolver at my forehead. There's no way he was going to miss it. Annie cried hopelessly. I struggled to untie the ropes but of no use. He had already started the countdown. "10............9...........8............7...........6.........5"

I had too given up all hopes by then. There's no way out of this.

"4....."

He gripped the revolver tighter

"3...."

His index finger was on the trigger

"2...."

His Aim was perfectly set!

"and....."

"Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk" The room vibrated with the sound of police car sirens. Soon the place was raided with police. "What? How?" the man looked about cluelessly. Soon Floren and other officers broke into the room and arrested him. "I'll come back!" He growled as the police handcuffed him and dragged him out. We were set free. "But how on earth?" I asked confused.

"Well...looks like you're driver is the man of the match!" Floren said. "He didn't feel right about you going with the man so he noted down the car's number and then called me. I tracked down the car and found this location. But I also tried tracking you phone but unfortunately the locations didn't match. That's how I knew your phone wasn't with you which is unusual and I didn't waste another minute."

~~~~~~

Well that was a dreadful day indeed. I met death so closely. I can never ever forget that 10 seconds of countdown.....

December 26, 2020 16:36

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5 comments

Monisha Saha
03:12 Jan 04, 2021

Wonderfully Written. Well done 👏👏👏

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03:14 Jan 04, 2021

Thank you =)

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10:40 Dec 29, 2020

Hi readers and authors =) Hope you're having a great day ;) So I just wanted to say that I've approached the prompt a bit differently. Instead a writing a story that takes place across ten seconds I've focused a very important 'ten seconds' in my story and made it the highlight of the story. Hope you like it =) and please feel free to give any suggestions or correct any errors. That will help me a lot while writing stories in future. =) Thank you!

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Aarshia Ray
18:26 Dec 26, 2020

A nice story :-)

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18:18 Dec 27, 2020

Thnx =)

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