I was just joking. I didn’t think the fucker would actually show me his hot wheels collection. Also, who keeps their hot wheel collection on their yacht? This guy is a billionaire and I have no idea how. Regardless, I’m trapped in a sex dungeon on a moving boat with no idea how to get out. There is a deeper explanation to how I got there. My friends and I got invited to a who’s who of Hollywood party due to my ability to make friends. I have no intention of ever being an actor, director, or writer. I just love to be around it, and apparently I’ve made a lot of powerful friends whilst fetching coffee and building props. This particular party happened to be at Nicholas Cage’s house. I bet you didn’t know he threw absolute bangers. We were all having a good time getting fucked up and listening to Leonardo DiCaprio’s stories about his cat. Then it took a wild turn for me. The Paul brothers were there. Don’t ask me who invited them. You see everyone is my friend but nobody actually keeps up with me. I’m like Todd from Bo Jack Horseman. It’s quite the life. This Jake Paul guy invited me to see his hot wheels collection and I said sure thinking everyone was gonna jump on the bandwagon of ‘Who the fuck wants to see that?’ Nobody did. As I said earlier, I hopped on this man’s yacht and I’m looking around. Everything seems normal. There are fine bitches everywhere so I guess looking at a couple model cars isn’t so bad. And I mean everywhere. On the dock, in the kitchen, driving the boat-It’s a fucking whirl wind of beautiful women. So I’m finally done looking right. Maybe I can finally get back to my friends after an hour of entertaining this goof. Not so fast. I turn around and this fucker is gone. But there are some girls scattered here and there. So I’m talking to them, you know thinking with this little dick of mine. They talk me into coming on a more detailed tour. The tour did not last very long. We got to the Second floor bathrooms before they asked me if I wanted to get absolutely blasted with them. I’m not gonna lie-I said yes. So I guess I did this to myself. Now that it’s over I’m honestly glad I did it. Before I knew it I was slinging dick like David on a bay of rocks. Yes, I was able to sneak a bible reference in this story. It’s not like I knew what I was doing. I don’t even remember making my way to the basement. It was just all bitches. Some guys scattered here and there. No Paul brother’s to be found. That’s what made me nervous. I thought to myself I’m a part of a giant orgy on someone else’s moving yacht. That’s when it hit me. About 3 hours after arriving I realized this puppy was moving. I panicked. I was no longer high within a matter of minutes. Some other fucked up dude told me he’d been on the yacht for days and all he had to eat was ass. What kind of twisted joke did I just become a part of? I was doomed to fuck fine bitches until I die. It was over. No light at the end of the tunnel. How was I supposed to make it back to shore in the dark. And once this took off there was no way I’d ever be able to get off before the next port. No telling where the next stop would be. It was the Paul Sex Dungeon and I…did more heroin so I could forget about it. I was gonna die anyway. But right after snorting cocaine off Alexis Texas’ ass I thought about my light at the end of the tunnel comment in my brain from earlier. It was probably only ten minutes in real time. The point was-it was about to be the time change. The clock would move forward an hour and since I had remembered somebody saying we weren’t taking off until summer officially started that must mean he waited for daylight. Had it only been three hours? Was this Logan giving me a chance to prove myself and get out of here? I had felt worthy. This was all a test. Would I let beautiful brunet number 3, also known as Julia Fox, suck my cock off, or would I fight my way out of here. So that’s what I did. Okay I admit I let her do it first, but I came quickly. Then I started fighting my way out. Looking back on it I really hope I didn’t punch any of the girls in the face. I climbed out of there as foreign milfs tried to claw me back in. I could smell the freedom. Or maybe it was the smell of sex. Hopefully Rihanna wasn’t close because she’d die in there. Once I was on the 3rd floor I only had two more to climb before reaching the deck and touching the sunshine. Then I ran into one of the Paul brother’s. He said I was losing my mind. Probably. Turns out I always had a chance to leave. He just didn’t realize I was still on the boat. I liked my story better though. I guess I’ve been around these Hollywood hotshots for too long. I usually just stick with my favorite story but I’ll tell you the truth. He was just gonna let me walk up the floors. No nonsense, no ninjas. An amazing story with a terrible ending. One of the brother’s even offered to turn the boat around. But I said no way. If I’m gonna tell this story to my celebrity friends I had to make it good, and I had to keep myself from lying. So I asked Logan to try and fight me. He of course swung horribly and missed. Once I dodged that I went up the stairs. The elevator was too easy. Then I finally reached it. The crack of dawn was peering onto the top deck. I stepped out from under the overhead covering and let the sunlight finally touch me before I dove in the water and swam to safety.
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