Targeted Mad

“Can you keep a secret?”

That was the question that started it all. I quickly clicked out of the dialogue box that had posed it upon my screen, but it was persistent. Another appeared, prompting me to answer the same question. There was only one option to click on; ‘yes’. I assumed it was the beginnings of a scam or some type of malicious software bait. Again, I clicked the close button on the window. My screen flickered and it returned to taunt me a third time. I squinted at it, mildly frustrated.

“What the hell?” I asked aloud.

I dragged my mouse over to the menu to restart my computer, hoping this would solve the problem. However, the screen had other plans. It flickered once more, and the arrow returned to the center of the monitor. A distorted chuckle echoed out from my speakers. I raised my eyebrows- this was weird. I bit my lip and slammed my finger onto my tower’s power button, holding it down as if I were forcing the source of my annoyance beneath water to suffocate it. Just when I thought my attempt to drown it was about to be successful, there was a flash. A spark shot out from the power button, shocking my finger. I quickly retracted my hand, sucking on the tip of my index as my speakers proceeded to cackle once more.

“CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET?” The dialogue box was in caps this time.

I started to sweat. What was going on? I pushed myself up from my seat. I had to get away for a minute and think about how to approach this peculiarity. I turned and walked towards my bedroom door, placing my hand on the knob.

“I wouldn’t leave if I were you.” A warped voice came from the speakers.

“Who’s there!?” I jumped around.

The monitor flickered and the dialogue box flashed brightly. It multiplied, layering clones of itself across the screen like the crude pasting of concert posters upon the wall of a city building. I pivoted and gripped the doorknob again, turning it slightly.

“Open that door and your internet history will be uploaded across all of your social media accounts.” The voice spoke again.

I was going to ignore it. I continued to twist the knob around, but then I froze. What if… whatever this thing was was serious? I released the handle.

“That’s what I thought. You wouldn’t want Grandma Sharon to know what kind of pornography you watch would you? Cousin Gail? Aunt Cynthia? Mom? Dad? Pastor Tom? You have your boss friended too, don’t you? Bold move.” It snickered.

“Wha- I- It’s not even that weird!” I tried to defend myself, though I knew it didn’t matter. It would be embarrassing either way if such a devastating invasion of my privacy came to pass.

“Oh? Let’s see here… Nun costumes- Pastor Tom will love that, I’m sure. Candlewax… Shibari… Feet? You think they won’t find your foot fetish weird? Oh, interesting. You’ve been on some webcam sites too. Participating in the chats even. Giving tips, making requests. Let’s read some of the things you’ve sai—”

“Okay fine!” I said in a defeated tone. I sighed. “What do you want?”

“Sit back down and answer the question.”

Begrudgingly, I sat back down in my chair.

“Who are you?” I asked.

The voice did not respond. Instead, the many dialogue boxes blinked their requests once again. I peered through the corners of my eyes to the power strip beneath my desk. Raising my foot over it, I prepared to push down and flip the switch, cutting the power to my entire setup. However, as my foot started to descend, the screen flashed and I froze. Several windows spawned and I watched as the username and passwords to my many social media platforms were all being filled out, logging me in. I retracted my foot and rested it back down on the floor in front of me. The voice laughed through my speakers.

My social media profiles disappeared and were replaced again by the collage of dialogue boxes- this time each one was adorned with an emoji that appeared to be laughing so hard that tears ran in streams down its face.

I jumped at the sudden feeling of a buzzing in my pocket. Of course! My phone! I could just call the police and report that someone was harassing me! I pulled it out and, ignoring the notification, opened my phone app. I dialed the emergency number and hovered my thumb over the ‘call’ button. I nervously looked up to the screen. It didn’t appear to have changed.

Suddenly, my hand felt hot. Very hot. My phone screen started to distort as the device overheated. I tossed the phone away from myself and clutched at my seared hand. The voice chuckled again, and the lights in my room flickered- I momentarily chastised myself for getting those wifi bulbs as I jumped back up from my chair.

“This isn’t funny!” I shouted. Panic began to set in as I cradled my burned hand. “What do you want from me!?”

“CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET?” The dialogue boxes strobed and all the emojis were replaced with red angry faces.

I don’t know what the hell I was dealing with, but it clearly wanted me to play along. I lowered back into the chair slowly. I began to sob. I felt trapped. I couldn’t leave, I couldn’t call for help, I couldn’t even power the machine down. What other choice did I have? I winced and the voice cackled as I slowly and shakily hovered the pointer over the ‘yes’ button.

I wanted to turn away, but I couldn’t. I had to see what this was all about. I bit my lip and pressed my finger down, finally giving in and clicking the only option I was given. The dialogue boxes all suddenly disappeared. A video began playing. A kind-looking middle-aged man walked alongside a stream with his hands in his pockets. A nostalgic, yet uplifting tune played along in the background.

“I’ve got a problem.” A male voice came over my speakers- an audio narration laid over the video.

I raised an eyebrow. The man was now sitting down with a woman of similar age. A fancy looking meal was laid out before them. They clinked wine glasses that glimmered softly in dim candlelight.

“But you wouldn’t know it.” The man’s voice continued. He was now walking in a park playing fetch with a dog. “Can you keep a secret?”

The man turned towards the screen and grinned. I cringed slightly, unsure of what was about to happen. The scene changed again and the man was now attempting to pump water from a spout in the ground- with little success.

“I suffer from erectile dysfunction.” He said.

“Wait, what?” I blinked wildly and shook my head in disbelief as the woman walked back on screen. She gripped the handle, laying her hands over the man’s and they proceeded to vigorously work the pump together. The spout finally burst, generously spraying water across the entire scene and all over the woman. Her already form-fitting dress clung closer to her skin as she was soaked through. They tossed their heads back in laughter.

“Thanks to Hardenuf, I feel like a new man. Just one pill twenty minutes before intercourse and I can satisfy her needs- AND mine!”

The screen changed and a Hardenuf pill bottle appeared, peering out from behind the fine print listing potential side effects and warnings that scrolled across the screen.

“Hardenuf- because life should only be hard, when you want it to be!”

The video faded out and disappeared completely. My screen returned to normal and I sat silent for a moment. Trying to process what had just happened.

“All this to make me watch an ad? … ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?”

I never heard the voice again.