THE TIME HAS COME

Submitted into Contest #39 in response to: Write a story about a Google Street View driver.... view prompt

175 comments

General

The time has come.


If you are a finding this, then either you have passed away - or you’re about to.


No one else knows this place but him.


If you do, then you can’t go.


If he has let you come this far, then you can’t live.


Don’t try to call the cops - it will be too late anyway.


Don’t try to yell - he made sure no one can hear you.


Don’t try to catch him - he won’t be caught unless he wants to.


Don’t try to run - he won’t let you get far.


Don’t try to hide - he will find you.


Don’t try to live - he has confirmed your death.


Don’t try anything - he will hunt you down.


Before you ask any other questions, you must know about him.


To know about him, you must know about his past.


***


He used to be a good guy and a really nice friend.


He was the best son in the world and he loved his daughter very dearly for her

entire life.


Not only was he a family man, but he was also a driver - just like you and me, and

many others - like us.


He was a driver for Google and he screened the streets for everyone to see - sound

familiar?


He took his daughter with him one day to seek out a new place.


She enjoyed it the whole way to the place.


They stopped at a carnival on the way and they got on every single ride.


You could even give them the title of “Best Father and Daughter.”


When the night was falling, they stopped by a hotel - not far from where you are.


They stayed for the night and decided to leave in the morning.


They slept sound and when they woke up in the morning, his daughter was missing.


There wasn’t a place where he didn’t look.


He looked in the room and in the lobby of the hotel.


He asked the neighbors and he ran around the parking lot.


He left the hotel in his car and looked all around the hotel.


He drove for miles.


He drove for hours.


He drove for his daughter.


After driving for a long time, he started to head back - thinking that his daughter

might have shown up back at the hotel.


On his way back, he found a forest - the exact one where you are right now.


He looked around everywhere, but she was found nowhere.


He got back in his car and started to head back.


Unfortunately for him, his camera on his car fell off and it blocked his view from

seeing the back.


Just then, he hit something.


Whatever he hit, it made a loud thump.


He couldn’t quite tell because the camera was in his way, but he saw blood.


When he got out, he saw her there.


He saw his daughter, bleeding and on the ground with an ice cream cone in her

right hand and a balloon in her left.


He felt bad, but he didn’t know what to do with her.


He couldn’t tell anyone, but he couldn’t keep it to himself.


He buried her right where he found her.


You are sitting on her grave.


***


— Now, you might be wondering how you are related to this, but trust me, you fit

perfectly into his story.


You both have had a family.


You and he are both drivers for Google.


You both chart the uncharted as a street driver.


You both brought your loved ones to the hotel.


You both ventured out to this park here.


You both —


Even if you live - your loved one won’t so don’t fight it - your loved one is next.


Now, don’t think that he’s a psychopath.


He is actually really not.


He is just like you and me.


The only difference is that he cares.


He cares about his daughter and he cares about himself.


He even seems to care about you.


After realizing what happened to him, he wanted to protect others from the pain.


If he sees a Google Street View driver or even the car, he will go for them.


He targets those who are just like him.


He doesn’t want to see another driver kill a loved one.


He killed his daughter on accident, and you are the victim of his change.


He will first kill you, and then your loved ones.


No one knows about this place, and no one will.


You need not worry about hurting a loved one - you won’t be there to hurt them,

and neither will they.


***


Let me just sum up everything real quick:


— He was a father and a driver.


— He accidentally killed his daughter because he couldn’t see the back of his car -

due to the camera on the top of his car.


— He wants to kill you so that you won’t have to worry about killing anyone else in

the future.


— He will also kill your loved ones so that they won’t have to suffer going through

life without you.


— He will bury you right next to his daughter so that you die peacefully.


— To make you feel even better, he will bury your loved one(s) along with you.


— He is doing you good in a way, so respect him.


— He is me, and I hope that you have signed this book - or else . . .


***


Do you hear that sound in the bush behind you?


That is him.


He is coming for you.


Don’t scream - he feeds off of fear.


Don’t run - he was a Google Street View driver, and if you know what I mean,

nothing ever goes out of his sight.


Everything is being recorded, so don’t try anything.


His motto is: “You won’t be there to kill anyone, ” and trust me - he means what he

says.


He’s coming closer, right?


But don’t worry; just sign your name in this book - next to all of his other victims.


At least your loved ones will find you in this way - oh wait, they can’t.


Remember that I am doing you a favor, so don’t feel bad.


Everything is going as planned.


All you have to do is cooperate with me.


Your cooperation is the least that I expect from you - after all, I am doing so much

for you.


Try to think happy thoughts - it’s now or never.


The time has come for you to part with this world.


The time has come for you to say your goodbye’s.


THE TIME HAS COME . . . for your death.

May 01, 2020 21:00

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175 comments

Vrishni Maharaj
18:00 May 27, 2020

Wonderful story!

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Abigail O
13:48 May 10, 2020

your stories are so amazing like when i read them it sets me in the same scene as the story as if im a character there or it has happened to me, keep up the good work

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Pranathi G
15:23 May 10, 2020

Thank you so much!

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14:48 May 09, 2020

"Will you still love me" by ravinder singh

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Pranathi G
17:02 May 09, 2020

Oh, ok. I will definitely try to read it!

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Joy Barton
05:53 May 09, 2020

Interesting technique of writing, I love the suspense too. Very well done!

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Pranathi G
14:15 May 09, 2020

Thank you!

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Hawwa Yusuf
17:58 May 08, 2020

like it really good!

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Steve Douwes
17:28 May 08, 2020

Well Pranathi, I must say WELL DONE. It was an immensely intriguing and cliff-hanging story. It felt like I was watching a SAW movie in text form. Suspenseful and dramatic. My only critique is not really a critique, but a suggestion. I only say this to heighten my intrigue. Bring more descriptive words or phrasing to simple things to broaden the imagination.. Ex: 'The time has come... for your death' could be 'The time has come for your ultimate demise, eternal slumber, never-ending darkness'. You know what I mean. Great story still. Well Done.

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Pranathi G
18:08 May 08, 2020

Thank you! That is great advice, I will certainly use this the next time I write! Thanks for reading!

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Manahil Khan
17:01 May 08, 2020

OMGGG!! The best short storyy I have ever read. Pranathi, you did an amazing job on this❤️. Really grateful to have read this. Totally understood the concept behind this one.

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Pranathi G
18:07 May 08, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Hapsat Mohammed
16:47 May 08, 2020

the story is well written, nice story line really, great work

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Shirley Medhurst
13:00 May 08, 2020

Very interesting & poetic style of writing which I thought was really effective. One thing: I do agree with some of the other comments about not really being overly concerned about the driver & his feelings though.... Maybe more of a build-up of the character before the accident would get the reader more emotionally engaged with him??? Well done overall !

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Pranathi G
13:05 May 08, 2020

Thank you! I will definitely take your advice the next time I write! Thanks for reading!

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18:37 May 07, 2020

Like Abigail said, it is very powerful! I ope you win!

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Pranathi G
18:42 May 07, 2020

Aww! Thank you so much! I hope I win too! :)

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16:52 May 07, 2020

Pranathi, I liked this story, because it moved fast and was furious in its intent. I feel that you build up tension and brought in a lot of detail about the Google driver (which by the way I had no idea was a thing, because I am behind the times), but after reading your piece I feel I know a really bad one. Keep writing.

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Pranathi G
17:03 May 07, 2020

Thank you!

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Felicity Edwards
14:33 May 07, 2020

Quite a story and an unusual presentation. I loved the almost poemlike quality and the repetition makes it visceral. One small thing it should be by accident not on accident. Well done

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Pranathi G
15:21 May 07, 2020

Oh, ok! Sorry, I will fix that! Thanks for reading!

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Hannah Reitz
04:04 May 07, 2020

This was really good an intriguing!! It was fun to read and had me asking a lot of questions

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Pranathi G
12:46 May 07, 2020

Thank you!

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Tina Laing
00:38 May 07, 2020

A very good story.

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Pranathi G
02:05 May 07, 2020

Thank you so much!

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19:23 May 06, 2020

I really like the format of this story. The single lines are like bullet points, they feel like individual thoughts. It's like a poem. I wonder about the motivation though - is he just going to kill any (street view) driver, because they might run over someone in the future? It would perhaps make more sense if he targeted dangerous drivers (people speeding, driving drunk, etc). Anyway, just my thoughts :) I look forward to reading more of your stories!

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Pranathi G
19:38 May 06, 2020

Thank you! I understand what you are saying and I will definitely take this advice into my mind the next time I write a somewhat similar story! Thank you for reading!

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14:38 May 06, 2020

Hey Pranathi. You asked for some feedback so here goes. The story format and the plotline was very strong and I loved the simplistic tone and no overuse of vocabulary. But, I suggest that you could turn up the emotions a bit, descripe them perhaps because I wasn't able to establish any real connection with the father or the "you", so even when the daughter died, I wasn't much moved. But overall, it was a very thrilling story. And this is only an advice. Ps: Thank you for viewing my story.

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Pranathi G
14:55 May 06, 2020

Thank you for the feedback! I will definitely take your advice the next time that I write a story! Thank you!

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NANDINI MUJUMDAR
10:27 May 06, 2020

Very engaging style of writing, especially for horrors & thrillers. Thanks for reading mine. Any way everyones time comes good or bad, as destined. It does not matter how you drive your exit should be peaceful and happy.

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Pranathi G
13:05 May 06, 2020

Thank you!

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03:35 May 06, 2020

Hey Pranathi :) You asked for some feedback so here goes: Firstly I found your format to be engaging and worked really well for your story- not over explaining things and leaving certain details vague (like the identity of the narrator or details about 'you')worked well and kept it uncomplicated. However, I found it a bit hard to be convinced by the fathers motivations to kill more people. Perhaps if the motive was stronger (revenge due to guilt etc) his reasons would be more compelling though this would involve tweaking the plot a little ...

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Pranathi G
13:06 May 06, 2020

Thank you! I will take your advice the next time I write another story! Thanks for taking the time to read my story!

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Pranathi G
22:54 May 05, 2020

Please like my story if you do like it!

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Harken Void
20:57 May 05, 2020

Hey there! I read your story and I liked hte formating and the concept that you were going with... but like others have pointed out already, there was a major misalignment behind the character's motivations. It would work better here if you portrayed him as a psychopath, because; killing others so they won't suffer makes no sense, it's precisely what makes them suffer, and what makes their loved ones suffer too.

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Pranathi G
21:08 May 05, 2020

Thank you! I do understand what you are saying and I will try to improve the next time I write! Thanks for your time!

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