Friendship Romance

She sketched out a faint drawing of a heart with an arrow in it. 

He peered over her shoulder.

The arrow was sharp as their words, she claimed, and when it pierced her heart, it stuck.

He always stood in awe of her meaningful artworks from scribbles to masterpieces. 

She quickly tucked away her drawing pad when she caught his eyes on her.

“Why do you hide your work? It’s beautiful,” he said softly, reaching out to tuck her hair behind her ear.

“Leave me alone!” she said as she pushed his hand away. 

“Wait,” he called, but it was too late, her sunshine hair was already flowing down the hall.

She ran and never looked back; she couldn’t look back.

He sighed as he stuffed his hands in his pockets and turned the other way.

She leapt down the stairs at a frightening pace, hot tears streaming down all the way.

He slowly shuffled his feet as he gathered his load.

She came to an abandoned corner, and softly whispered, “I’ve found my place.”

He let the crowd shove him about as they all flooded to lunch.

She sat in the corner alone and resumed her drawing, making the arrow sharper.

He got his cold lunch from the cafeteria and sat alone at a blue picnic table.

Tears came back to her eyes as she remembered many words, no, the words spoken to her.

He lifted a forkful of noodles, and set it back down in the cold bowl.

You’re such a dork!

He sighed once more.

Nobody cares, Loser!

He laid his head of brown hair on the table.

Get lost!

“Why won’t she listen to me?”

Sorry, no jerks allowed, Jerk!

“I was just admiring her drawings.”

Teacher’s pet! Teacher’s pet!

He played the thoughts over in his head.

Tear-stains covered her sketch pad. 

A voice called to him.

She turned the page and began on curvy silhouettes of trees and shadows.

“Hey, you alright?”

She was so engrossed in her creation. 

“No, not really.”

Her brow furrowed and her steady scratch of her pencil ticked on the paper.

“Need to talk about it, man?”

It was coming alive inside her, she could see it clearly.

“Well, it’s a bit complex…”

A big towering tree stood tall and proud.

“Go ahead, we got all of lunch to talk.”

A valley of broken bones and dead trees stood begrudgingly beneath the tall wonder. 

“It’s about my friend.”

That’s me someday.

“Go on, what about them?”

I’m a leader, just like my mother said.

“She’s been kinda toxic lately, kinda keeping her distance.”

Those bullies can’t stand up to me if I don’t let them.

“She wouldn’t even let me see her drawing today.”

I’ll break their bones and scatter their flesh over the earth.

“Well, why do you think that she’s avoiding you?”

I’ll stand up to them.

“I’m not too sure. I never really understood women-folk anyway.”

She clenched her pencil hard enough to crack it.

A small chuckle escaped their lips.

But then, she lessened her grip, easing her temper. 

“Any guy that can understand women at all is a smart guy.”

I’ve made a mistake.

“Ain’t that the truth!”

She gulped down regrets and lies.

“Now, onto the reason, why?”

She hurriedly packed up her stuff and ran back up the stairs. 

“I told you, I don’t know.”

She bolted out the doors into the noisy cafeteria. 

“Maybe something’s been going on in her family life?”

She scanned the room, honing in on one suspect in particular. 

Maybe...But I suppose all I can do is ask.”

She walks over to the table, nervously messing around with her backpack straps.

“And you’ll get your chance, here she comes now.”

She nodded shyly at the boys, and she was appreciative when the stranger left.

“Hey. Are you doing okay?” he asked.

“About that...Look, I’m sorry about my behavior. It was childish,” she said quickly. 

Taken aback, he quickly searched for words, but she was ahead of the game.

“No, don’t apologize or say something pitiful like you boys always do,” she said sternly.

“Wait, I wasn’t going to say any of that. If you will just listen to me…” his voice wandered off.

She took a deep breath. “I’ll listen.”

“I love your artwork,” he blurted out as his face reddened. 

Now it was her turn to be taken aback.

“It’s just...so meaningful and amazingly drawn,” he said, shifting his legs under the table.

“No one’s ever commented about my art before. And never nice things. You really like it?” she said.

“Of course I like it! Why wouldn’t any guy in his right mind like that beauty?” he said.

A smile grew on her face.

He returned the gift.

“That’s really sweet of you. Thanks for caring,” she said halfheartedly. 

He took her hand and gazed into her crystal eyes that reminded him of the ocean, stern, but gentle when it chose to be. 

Her smile became genuine.

“I really meant everything I said. And also, I think your eyes are very pretty. Reminds me of the ocean, stern, but gentle when it chooses to be,” he said.

“Your hair reminds me of the forest floor, dirty, unkempt, and full of life wherever you look,” she said with a wink.

His wild laughter spread as an echo over the tables. “Now you’ve got me. Say, may I see that drawing you were working on earlier?”

She shyly handed over her notebook. 


And that’s how he and she became they and them. They lived a long happy life, she as an artist, and he as a writer. They made many friends along the way, always savoring the small moments and special times.


Life is too short not to laugh, so laugh while you can. -Unknown

Posted Aug 20, 2021
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25 likes 25 comments

Amel Parvez
09:27 Aug 22, 2021

Beautiful!

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19:22 Aug 28, 2021

ahhh I loved the end <3
this was really poetic and...aHmAziNg <33 loved the quote too :D
GARLICAPTIVATING 🧄🧄🧄 job!!!
~ Amethyst
[sorry for reading this so late~<3]

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20:13 Aug 20, 2021

This was such a sweet story! Great title. I love how you alternated between the POVs of the boy and the girl. The overall plot was just amazing, and the ending...perfect! Loved the quote too :D
Great job!! (Also I noticed I missed two of your other stories before this one so I’ll get to those soon XD)

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11:45 Aug 20, 2021

Aww! I love this! I really like the way you switched between each POV. It makes the story so unique and interesting to read.

The ending by was so sweet! Literally so perfect for this story.

I also appreciate the stranger character, providing advice.

Amazing job, Tiffany! :)

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Sapphire 🌼
21:12 Oct 16, 2021

Hello wolf 'tis Countess Soup here with her critique! (sorry idk, im rlly bad at starting off comments-)

~~~
- When you said "from scribbles to masterpieces" my brain tried to correct "scribbles" to "skribbls" and it took me an entire minute to realise that was wrong LOL

I love how you switched between she and he, I don't know why but I just found it so cool how the story flowed, all while including the switches. It was amazing in the first paragraph when she ran away, I really enjoyed the parallel actions of the two.

~~~
My favourite part:

He played the thoughts over in his head.
Tear-stains covered her sketch pad.
A voice called to him.
She turned the page and began on curvy silhouettes of trees and shadows.
“Hey, you alright?”
She was so engrossed in her creation.
“No, not really.”
Her brow furrowed and her steady scratch of her pencil ticked on the paper.
“Need to talk about it, man?”
It was coming alive inside her, she could see it clearly.
“Well, it’s a bit complex…”
A big towering tree stood tall and proud.
“Go ahead, we got all of lunch to talk.”
A valley of broken bones and dead trees stood begrudgingly beneath the tall wonder.
“It’s about my friend.”
That’s me someday.

--> That was so...so beautiful and smooth...and- and- so....simultaneous. I admire your writing <3

You should definitely try this style of switching perspectives more, I sincerely loved it so so much.

~~~
And this: "A smile grew on her face.

He returned the gift."

I SWEAR I SMILED TOO-

~~~
For critique, this part- "He took her hand and gazed into her crystal eyes that reminded him of the ocean, stern, but gentle when it chose to be.

Her smile became genuine.

“I really meant everything I said. And also, I think your eyes are very pretty. Reminds me of the ocean, stern, but gentle when it chooses to be,” he said."

--> I think you should change the description of her eyes in the dialogue when he says "I really meant everything I said...etc." because you already said it before. Either changing the first part that he thinks in his head about her crystal eyes, and keep the dialogue or change the dialogue and keep his thoughts the same.

--> Also, while I loved the simplicity of the story, I think adding more emotion, more backstory would've helped to enhance it. I love it how it is though :) The quote at the end really tied it all together!

~~~

This was such a sweet story, and so so well written! I loved it wolfie <3

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Naomi Mordaunt
04:14 Aug 26, 2021

Oh my goodness this is amazing!!
I love how this has someone scared of showing their art even when it's beautiful, I find myself constantly terrified as well that everyone who sees my drawings are secretly judging, and if I think something is good, and show it to someone, I almost immediately think it sucks. It's the same with my writing. My older sister is an amazing writer and I often feel overshadowed by her, so I often hide my writing from anyone, because I'm utterly mortified thinking that they're comparing me to her.

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Kat Mordaunt
04:45 Aug 26, 2021

NAOMI DON'T YOU DARE HIDE YOUR WRITING IT'S AMAZING!!!!!!!!!! HAVE YOU READ ANYTHING THAT I WROTE A YEAR AGO??? IT'S ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO KEEP WRITING, KEEP GETTING FEEDBACK, KEEP GETTING BETTER, AND YOU'LL BE AN EPIC WRITER ONE DAY!!!!!!!!! EVEN IF YOU ONLY WRITE AS A HOBBY!!!!!!!!!!! YOU'RE EPIC DON'T TELL YOURSELF ANYTHING ELSE!!!!!!!!!!

I know what you feel Nay that's what I feel when I show my drawings to people, cuz either Ella or Nora are always better than me so I rip all my bad drawings out of my sketchbook to make me look not as bad at drawing

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Naomi Mordaunt
04:55 Aug 26, 2021

Katrina, you started lost Child a year ago. That book is amazing!!!

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Kat Mordaunt
05:03 Aug 26, 2021

hehe I cringe every time i look at them so I rip them up so I don't have to cringe anymore

and right now you're comparing your writing to mine. I'm a year older than you!!! A lot can happen in a year!!!
random quote I'm pretty sure I didn't just make up maybe-idk-probably:
don't compare yourself to others who are better than you, or you will think of yourself as bad. don't compare yourself to people who are worse than you, or you will become arrogant. COMPARE YOURSELF TO YOURSELF, AND SEE HOW FAR YOU'VE GONE INSTEAD.

wow. that sounds fancy. huh.

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Naomi Mordaunt
22:30 Aug 26, 2021

sure does

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Naomi Mordaunt
04:57 Aug 26, 2021

But I know how you feel with Ella and Nora, I hate when they look at my drawings

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Kat Mordaunt
03:40 Aug 26, 2021

omgggggggggggggg yassssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

I kinda hate romance books/novellas/short stories/just romance in general (but romance in epic fantasy/action/you get what I mean is greattttttttt) and for some reason this is just amazing 😁❤
It might be because I see a bit of myself in her - I totally hide my drawings because I think that everyone's gonna hate them and tease me for them or give me fake compliments while they're actually judging me.

maybe it's just because it gives poor kids like me hope 😂

anyway
It was epic I loved it good job and all that snazzy stuff

Reply

Epiphany Moucka
01:52 Aug 25, 2021

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Sadie Rae
22:51 Aug 24, 2021

hey there, this is saturn, i changed my username, just letting you know

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18:17 Aug 23, 2021

I love this! Great work as always! Also, I nodiced you changed you're name. Did you change it to match mine? Or is it just random?

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Dhwani Jain
03:03 Aug 23, 2021

I am back!!!
Please help me by upvoting/downvoting one or two points so that I can get away from the curse of '2020'.

Reply

Dhwani Jain
03:03 Aug 23, 2021

I am back!!!
Please help me by upvoting/downvoting one or two points so that I can get away from the curse of '2020'.

Reply

Dhwani Jain
03:02 Aug 23, 2021

I am back!!!
Please help me by upvoting/downvoting one or two points so that I can get away from the curse of '2020'.

Reply

19:52 Aug 21, 2021

ohmigosh this was so beautiful i cant-

This is POSSIBLE my favorite story you've written so far, I absolutely LOVED the formatting (every line switching the POV), it really enhanced the story! And the quote at the end really tied it all together! Gj!

(also, happy late 80 stories!)

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18:01 Aug 21, 2021

🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼🐼

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17:03 Aug 21, 2021

such a charming and delightful story, Wolfie! I absolutely love the title and I think it matches the story really well. The ending was great too. I think the quote at the end was great and original. I love all your stories and this did not bring down my expectations!!! Keep it up! Happy writing!

-❤- 𝔹𝕖𝕝𝕝𝕒

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Dhwani Jain
05:27 Aug 20, 2021

Oh wow!
This was so special! It felt precious, price-less. I don't know why, but it felt so real, so true!

I do have one suggestion. If you could make the girl-sentences in italics and the boy-sentences in normal....then it could be easy to identify them.

This story was like a caterpillar turning into a butterfly and waiting for it's wings to dry to take off. And when it did take off, it was more beautiful than anything else in the world!

♥💖💗💓💟❤💞💝🧡❣💕😍

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Keya J.
04:20 Aug 20, 2021

What a sweet and unique piece of art!! I love it.
It was indeed an extraordinary way of representation. It's the first time I have read such way of narration.
Great Work!

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Unknown User
13:19 Aug 25, 2021

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Unknown User
07:39 Aug 20, 2021

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