Life with Reggie

Life with Reggie

Suzanne Marsh

"You found a what and are bringing it where?"

"I am bringing home a baby raccoon, I accidentally ran over it Mama. It is so little,

I can't just leave the poor little thing here to fend for itself."

"Okay, but you take care of it."

"I will Mom, no worries."

Now I had something to worry about; any time my son said: no worries Mom.

I knew I would be stuck with taking care of the raccoon. I already resolved myself to that fact. I had no idea how to care for a baby raccoon. This is a wild animal, I decided I would Google Raccoons. Goggle, was a big help. I already had a child proof, cat proof house, what could a raccoon do? I was intrigued to discover President Calvin Coolidge had a pet raccoon. I decided that if a raccoon could reside in the White House, then surely it could reside in our home for a short while. A very short while.

I checked the house, the baby locks were still on the cabinets, I found the baby gate and put it across the stairs going up to the bedrooms. The basement door was closed. I wondered what this little creature could sleep in. Google didn't really mention anything about bedding a raccoon down. It was so small, I wondered what to feed this little being. Once again Google came to the rescue. I made a quick trip to a farm store where I purchased a farm baby bottle and KMR (Kitten Milk Replacement).

The clerk handed me a pamphlet about Raccoons, showed me where the items were that I needed; that was all well and good but I still had no idea what to expect. Forty five minutes later my son Todd arrived home, with this tiny little ball of fur. It peered up at me with one little eye open. That was my introduction to Reggie aka Reginald aka oh no you don't.

We settled him in his box, all nice a snugly. I had followed the prescribed building of a raccoon nest. I then showed my son, the baby bottle, and the kitten formula, informing him he would have to feed the little creature every two hours, six to eight cc's. He stared blankly at me:

"Mom, I can't do that! I wouldn't get any sleep! How could I get up and go to school?"

I knew this would happen, good ole Mom gets stuck with another project.

"All right Todd, I'll tell you what I will do: I will feed little Reggie here during

the week, on weekends you take care of him."

"Awe, Mom."

"Don't awe Mom me, you are the one that brought him home; that make's him your

responsibility. Is it a deal or not?"

"Well, okay I suppose.'

"How do you feed him any way."

"I Googled it we have to warm the formula up, then we place him on his tummy.

He will suck. We have to clamp a hand firmly over the muzzle, (nose, mouth area)

then we rub his back to get him started."

"Mom, I can't do that."

"Oh, yes you can. We will do it together this time."

Those words in the weeks to come would come back to haunt me. Reggie, those first two weeks would wake every two hours like clock work. The first night, Todd gave him his ten o'clock feeding. So just like any newborn, Mom was up every two hours. The three o'clock feeding scared me, I thought I lost Reggie. I must have tucked him into the old flannel shirt by accident. He was fine, I was in a panic!

So our lives continued. Reggie, was growing and changing. He was now roughly four weeks old. He was eating every four hours, which beat every two hours. Todd, still moaned and groaned on weekends because he had to feed the critter. I reminded him each time he was the one who brought it home. Reggie, was now beginning to develop some personality. He liked to cuddle, which at times could be a problem. One evening as I was getting ready for bed, Reggie appeared. I sat down on the bed, Reggie climbed up my leg, seated himself in my lap. I put him back in his box, thinking that would be the end of it. Unsuspecting fool that I am; Reggie was now nearing adulthood, meaning he would begin his nocturnal jaunts. These jaunts quickly became the bane of our existence.

The first night Reggie decided it would be interesting to see what was in the cupboards. I heard a loud bang. Whatever it was it wasn't good. I jumped out of bed with fireman like haste, taking the stairs two at a time. Todd, was hot my heals. The kitchen wasn't pretty, Reggie had emptied the flour container all over the tiled floor. I think there might have been some sugar mixed it by the time we arrived. Todd, captured Reggie, he put him back in his box. Raccoons, are very intelligent animals and Reggie was no exception. While Todd returned to bed, I cleaned up the kitchen. I stumbled back to bed, only to find Reggie in it, very pleased with himself.

I decided at that point Reggie required a cage, to keep him out of trouble at night. The following morning I Googled "cages for raccoons". I found one at a pet store called "Rat Manor". I brought "Rat Manor" home and assembled it. I couldn't find Reggie in his box, this definitely was not a good thing. Actually things were to quiet. I didn't have to look to far; there on the dining room sitting up his haunches, eating grapes from a bowl of fruit. I motioned, then spoke:

"Reginald, get off the table, shew!"

He waddled off the table, grumbling. He followed me to the refrigerator so I gave him some grapes. I then proceeded to put him in "Rat Manor". He wasn't a happy camper by any stretch of the imagination. He chattered, then became quiet. Not more than three minutes after I put him in "Rat Manor" he was out! This was not working here. I knew it was time to attempt to return Reggie to the wild. I just didn't have the heart to do it; I had actually become rather attached to him.

Reggie's first Christmas, was...well...a disaster from the moment the tree went up. Raccoons enjoy round shiny objects, and Reggie was no exception. I let him out of his cage, one I Reggie proofed. "Rat Manor" had long since been discarded. Reggie, took one look at the blue spruce Christmas tree, making a leap for the middle of the tree. The tree began to sway...I ran over to steady it...so far, so good. Reggie found a branch and settled in. That was all well and good until he decided that a very pretty sparkling Christmas tree ornament required a closer inspection. He reached out to grab it...the tree began to wobble. Before I could catch it, the tree fell. Ornaments were all over the floor, some broken, some not.

"Reginald!"

He knew he was in trouble, he sauntered over as if he did not have a care in the world. Todd, came home later that evening. I was grumbling under my breath as I picked up the last of the pieces of several ornaments.

"Hey, Mom, what happened?"

"Reginald happened, that is what happened."

"Now Mom, you know you love him."

"I tolerate him Todd, nothing more. I think we should return him to the wild."

"Mom, apparently you forgot what that wildlife group told you. Remember?"

"If you raise the raccoon to adulthood you can't return it to the wild. Yes, I

remember."

Reggie remained with us for almost twenty years, until his demise...no I didn't help with his demise: old age did that for me. Life with Reggie had a great many laughs and just as many tears.