Entries towards Change

1st Entry: February 29th, 3001

I've finally started writing the journal I promised my therapist about back on Earth, now that we've reached Marrs. it has two r's. I don't misspell. As scientists had predicted due to weakening magnetic fields, the sun rose in the West and Earth's gravity was basically kicking us out. In a flurry of panic and disarray, humanity once more succeeded, exactly as irritably as it could get.

I had been hopeful when Mars didn't work out. Until Marrs started surfing Media when I was fifteen. 'Can't quite believe I've lived a year after that.

I don't exactly love to reflect but my therapist is a cunning tester who told me I should "transfer" my "thoughts to ink" to "make way for the noble mind". So, I wish the human race had ended with the sunset in the East– right then and there, no worries after departure.

Things haven't changed much over here except my dad's low-paying job has turned into a no-paying job. He volunteered to help with the construction of houses for the poor. I wonder if he actually believes that anyone suffered poverty's trauma more than us. I wish he'd prioritize us over humanity sometimes; empathy over sympathy– Do I sound like Thanos? I shouldn't care.

My mom has started tutoring kids and teenagers. She's done with her fifth class of the day now. The kids are pleading her to repeat her adventure tales.

It's annoying how she has turned a matter of not affording to get to safety– not affording life to something worth pride.

This journaling b.s is really doing a number on getting on my nerves. We need to stop wasting money on it. I'm talking to mom tomorrow.

2nd Entry: 30th February, 3001

Turns out, there's 30 to 31 days in February and November, and 31 to 32 days in the rest of the months here. That's approximately 376 days– if I've managed to not blunder through calculation.

Nothing interesting really happened today. I've just been studying and using low-class pass in the library to understand this whole new world to get my mind off mom not caring about my opinion bregarding my own mental health and financial choices.

3rd Entry: March 1st, 3001

The flowers on this planet are kinda weird. I haven't seen many but I like to walk around and I saw a bunch of breeds with belly-like stems, juicy petals, watery cores and there was this one bed of air-floating flowers too. The owner had caught me oggling at them so he gave me a bit of background and basics. Embarrassing, but it was almost worth the knowledge.

If we had been here sooner, mom would have had studied these amazing breeds instead of the boring ones back home and actually made sales with her Botonical Bussiness Buddy book. And I would have been able to study with people at school.

I keep dreaming. It frustrates me. J don't think writing's for me.

4th Entry: March 3rd, 3001

I skipped two days of journaling and got an earful from Miss Therapist. She's okay at her job, but she's annoying as hell and won't keep her nose out of my bussiness and is a sly trapping witch that knows how to lure secrets out of me.

Welp, doesn't matter that I badmouthed her. She asked me to write. I wrote.

5th Entry: March 5th, 3001

Since she became my thirteenth birthday gift, till now, she's been nosy. So I don't know why I didn't see her discovery of my yesterday's journaling topic coming. A load of foolishness, I am.

She gave me a list of questions to answer "at my own pace and comfort" instead of choosing unsuitable topics. And I don't care if it's childish but I'm not listening to her because she's sly, nosey, selfish and she's only ever blabbering or asking me to do so for the sake of cashing.

6th Entry: March 27th, 3001

I haven't been journaling for a while. I've been salty and I don't exactly know why but I'm choosing not to dwell on it for the sake of my sanity.

I'm seventeen now. It's my birthday. Molly told me her name as a gift. Wow, saying her name's weird, she's always been Miss Therapist to me. She never gave me a gift before but said that this was her spirtual gift to me this year because she couldn't afford a concrete one. Sounds fishy to me. I've been feeling so mentally unstable that I think I heard her muttering about being stupid to waste time here when she could actually be earning somewhere else. She's weird, and she's making me weird too. It's what happens when you can't afford real therapy.

Anyway! First question on the list: What are you feeling right now? Woah, wait. Waitta catch me off-guard there... I can go at my own pace and comfort.

Random question: What's happiness? Answer: Joy.

Bye.

52nd Entry: May 10th, 3001

A couple of skips on the journey but I can't believe I've beared it this far. Molly's still annoying but her tactics are less annoying and more eye-opening now. Swear to God, she can't squeeze this one out of me. Ew, I just imagined pride on her face. Ugly.

Anyway! Question no. 46. A reason you're glad Marrs exists?

The plants! And other natural stuff. It's really much more beautiful than that messed up blue ball we used to live on. And I don't really know how to be eloquent about this but the nature here is just so.. captivating and appealing to the eye... and somehow the heart too. Yeah, that's my way of putting it, I guess.

3012th Entry: May 12th, 3008

It's Molly and I's first wedding anniversary so I'm going to be gifting her this notebook to let her know of the torture she's put me through. Also, how she's helped me not want to wish to be the one comitting suicide in place of Charlie, and understanding mom and dad, and encouraging me to work towards my passion (which she guessed was botany even though it wasn't obvious, she was just sly, doesn't matter what she says) and slipping in some no-payment sources, and basically teaching me what life is.

Thank you, annoying Miss Therapist.

(P.s. drop in at the Senior Centre after work. Let's drop our parents some pizza-macaroons. You have to drive there yourself. I've done enough by making you suspicious of my extra working hours due to buying a restaurant for various reasons. Surprise!

I know I'm still not that eliquent so excuse my form of communication xoxo)