Treasure

“You’re going the wrong way!”

I rolled my eyes. “You’ve been going the wrong way for the last century and a half!”

“Well, I didn’t ask you to tag along,” my prickly companion grouched back. She may not have asked for my presence, but was nonetheless unsurprised when we ran into one another. Quite literally.

I’d been trudging contently down the remote game trail, which ideally would have led me to the treasure we both sought, when suddenly something had rushed toward me, crashing through the underbrush. The next thing I knew, our bodies collided and we were rolling down the steep hill beside the trail. The hill’s slope gradually eased. However, a few meters after the ground flattened completely, it ended altogether. In a cliff. Whose edge our momentum merrily carried us over.

More years than most could conceive had taught me caution. After all, I never would have lived so long without a little help. So, I’d taken to wearing a protection charm I’d discovered in a crusader’s crypt almost a hundred year ago now. It absorbed most of the shock of hitting the water several dozen meters below me. And the rough riverbed below that. My breath was knocked from my lungs, but I didn’t liquefy instantly. Dragging myself to the surface of the rushing river was another matter, especially with my once partner in crime, Gabrielle O’Connell, still clinging to my chest.

I didn’t know how she survived. Perhaps it was the power of the Babylonian amulet she’d once stolen from me before I could determine its use. Or maybe she picked up an invulnerability curse somewhere. Or it could be that if one falls off a cliff enough times, their body just adapts. All I knew was that once again, she’d crashed another of my expeditions. And wherever Golden Gabby went, trouble followed.

After pulling ourselves from the river, far from where we’d fallen, I planned to leave Gabby to her own devices, but she insisted on following me as I tried to figure out how I could get back to the trail I’d been following, preferably sans the woman who knocked me off a cliff.

“All I’m saying is that maybe if you let me take a look at the map I know you have squirreled away down your trousers, perhaps I could help get us back on track.” She shrugged and casually looked toward the front of my pants. I resisted the urge to push her back into the river.

“The last time I let you anywhere near one of my maps, I woke up tied to the bed wearing nothing but my socks. And I didn’t hear from you again until I read in the news that you’d snatched that pirate’s chest from the derelict ship I told you about!”

Gabby shot me a smirk that said, well what else did you expect?

“There are no beds around this time,” she pointed out, pouting. I couldn’t respond. I refused to let her get any more under my skin that she already was. Growling, I marched ahead, doing my best to ignore her. I tried to picture the map in my head, loathe to give her the satisfaction of pulling it from where I’d hidden it the moment she crashed back into my life again.

Gabby stewed in silence for more minutes than I thought her capable of, but in the end, her extroverted nature won out. She jogged up to walk in step with me.

“So, I’m sure you are wondering what I was up to before we…crossed paths,” she started.

“Not really.”

“Well,” she continued, as well used to ignoring me as I her, “I was recently in Monaco when the delightful oil tycoon on my arm got into a heated debate with some friends about the existence of a rare gemstone that they believed was hidden somewhere in these very hills.” As she spoke, she glanced over at me, studying my face. I kept my eyes focused straight ahead and schooled my expression into an easy disinterest. I knew what she was up to, trying to read my reaction into revealing something. I wasn’t going to give her anything. Not this time.

“Anyway, he seemed to have all but forgotten I was standing there while his pals went on and on. Finally, after hours of bickering, they agreed to check it out. Can you believe that? Equating an archeological expedition—”

“Treasure hunt,” I corrected.

“…to ‘checking it out’? As if these things don’t take planning, effort, know-how.”

“What effort have you ever put into this game? You follow around, ahem, real explorers and mooch off their work. And then usually snake their finds out from under them,” I added bitterly.

“Please. I don’t need you or anyone. But why get my hands dirty when it looks so much better on you?” I knew Gabby was far from afraid to get dirt under her fingernails, both literally and metaphorically. But she also had a bad habit of scheming, double-crossing, and just plain getting lucky. I was unmoved, a skill that took me far too long to learn.

“He didn’t even invite me on this little trip. After I spent the whole evening listening to one boring story after another.”

“Smart man.” She stuck her tongue out at me.

“Honestly, he deserved to have his first class ticket stolen. And a little pocket change for incidentals.” Which explained why Gabby was running through the trees when she found me. Or more accurately, who was chasing her.

“Gab, you have to stop fleecing guys. A thirst for adventure won’t hold up as an excuse in court.” I shook my head, well aware of her dalliances with the wrong side of the law. Not that my own record was spotless. A long life combined with one spent seeking tales and treasure wasn’t for the saintly. But I didn’t make a habit of outright robbing people.

 “You act like I will ever get caught. I know how to run a con, thank you very much. I’ve been around almost as long as you.” She loved to gloat over the fact she was younger than me, always ignoring that while that might be true, we were both well past our natural expiration dates. “Certainly long enough to know not to use my real name.”

“You mean your latest one, of course.”

She smiled. “Of course.”

I snorted. “Golden Gabby, master of deception.” She scowled at the long time pet name, but I knew she’d secretly grown fond of it, even if the only time I used it these days was to make fun of her.

“You know that’s right,” she said, taking my teasing in stride. “Besides, it’s not like I’m the only one who’s ever bent the truth about their identity.”

“I can’t exactly get a new, legitimate passport every time my date of birth starts to look a bit questionable,” I responded.

She nodded knowingly. “Yes, all these legal documents really are the worst part of living so long.”

“Enough to make you dump your souvenir from Ponce de Leon’s fountain? Or avoid the next time-bending alternate dimension you stumble into?”

“Oh, even you have to admit that the beaches on that island in the Bermuda Triangle were divine.” She raised a hinting eyebrow. “Would you ever give up your stockpile courtesy of the Philosopher’s stone? Or that little protection charm you cling to?”

I dropped the necklace I’d been idly fidgeting with. In truth, no. I wasn’t ready to stop exploring yet, to truly grow old, all my best memories behind me.

Gabby shrugged. “I guess we’ll both just live forever,” she said glibly. I knew she was joking, but part of me wondered if that were actually possible. Could we keep avoiding death indefinitely?

We kept walking in what I hoped was the right direction, though I didn’t see any sign of the game trail I’d been following yet. Finally, I had to relent and pull out my map.

“Uh, nature calls, Gabby. I’ll be right back.” I headed toward what looked like a secluded copse of trees, listening closely for the tell-tale rustle of following footsteps, but there were none. Which was suspicious in itself. Gabby wasn’t typically one for respecting privacy, especially mine. “Back in a flash,” I called out for good measure. She didn’t respond.

As quickly as I could, I took the map from its case and tried to orient myself. After a few moments of searching, I spotted a landmark I was sure we’d passed maybe twenty minutes ago, an ancient tree growing at a peculiar angle. The good news: We were walking almost parallel to where we needed to be. The bad news: Gabby hadn’t come snooping yet.

Part of me wanted to proceed on my own. This was perfect. I knew where to go, and I didn’t have that nuisance of a woman trailing me, waiting for a chance steal the prize from me. On the other hand, Gabby wouldn’t sneak off on her own without the map. And yet, as I made my way back to where I’d left her, there was no sign of her. It seemed no matter how many times she’d gotten me into trouble, I just couldn’t leave her to get out of it on her own.

“O’Connell! Gabby, where did you go?” Several seconds of silence had my heart racing a little faster. “Stop screwing with me, O’Connell!” But still, nothing. Something really might have happened to her. “Come on, Gabby! Help me out here.” My calls echoed into the waiting woods.

A snap behind me broke the quite. “Funny, I was going to say the same thing,” a man’s voice said. I spun to seen a tall, well-built man in expensive hiking clothes, complete with a clearly well stocked Patagonia pack, Ray-bans, and a Rolex sport watch. A similarly attired man stood behind him. “You are acquainted with Gabrielle as well, I take it?”

“That’s one way of putting it. Where is she?”

“Well, that’s what I was wondering. After she ran off, I tracked her back and forth across this cursed jungle. We were supposed to find this treasure together. She told me she knew the perfect guide for such an expedition… and I suppose that must be you. I’m Everett Regan.” He smiled at me, but it was far from friendly.

“Let me get this straight. You and Gabby were in on this from the beginning? Then why the hell did she practically run me off a cliff?”

“I don’t know anything about that. All I know is that when she spotted you, she insisted she approach you on her own. That was the last time I saw her.” The man shrugged, apparently unconcerned with her whereabouts now that he’d found me, his ‘guide’.

She’d lied to me. Again. I don’t know why I didn’t see it coming. Gabby has double-crossed me countless times. Why should this journey be any different?

“I don’t really care what Gabby told you, but I am no one’s guide. So, I’ll just be on my way. Enjoy the woods. Watch out for cliffs. It’s a long way down.” The click of a gun stopped me in my tracks. Yeah, I had a feeling it wouldn’t be that easy. Gabby could never manage to con passive, non-violent men.

“Gabrielle told me you have a map to this coveted gemstone. I’d like to see it. Now, please.”

Of course she did. Not only did she lie, she led this lunatic straight to me. And then conveniently disappeared, leaving me to face the consequences. I considered remaining concerned for her safety, but with the gun now pointed at my head, I didn’t really feel like it.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The likelihood of talking myself out of this was slim. I wondered if my protection charm would deflect a bullet point blank. It was a risk I wasn’t quite ready to take.

“So, that wasn’t a map you hastily stuffed in your waistband when you returned from that cluster of trees over there?” He pointed over to where I’d been feigning a bathroom break to check the map. Dammit.

“Oh, you mean this map?” I pulled the case out, gripping it tightly. Regan pressed the barrel of the gun painfully against my temple with one hand, the other held out expectantly. Begrudgingly, I handed over the map case.

With his attention on the case, slowly he let the gun lower as I backed away. But not fast enough.

“Where the hell is the map?” he roared, shaking the empty waterproof case. I spun and sprinted toward the dense trees. A bullet sprayed splinters of wood inches from my head, and a tightening between my shoulder blades told me where the next one would go. I stopped running, hands high in the air.

“Stop!” someone shouted off to my left. I’d know that voice anywhere. “Please, don’t kill him,” Gabby pleaded, running between me and her gun-toting oil tycoon from wherever she’d evidently been hiding.

“Why shouldn’t I just kill you both? After you ran off on me.”

“Ran off? I was securing you a guide. And here he is, with a map, just like I promised.” She unceremoniously stuck her hand down my pants to retrieve the actual map. “Here.”

“Perfect. Now I don’t need either of you. You are certainly not worth the trouble.” The gun was leveled at my head once more. Jeez, she really could pick them.

“If you kill him, you’ll deprive yourself of one of the most experienced treasure hunters the world has ever seen,” Gabby told him smoothly. “Trust me, you need him to make it to the gem in once piece.” She didn’t meet my eyes or subsequently see the shock there.

We waited in silence. Regan’s eyes bounced between us. Finally, I sighed. “And if you kill her, I won’t help you. I don’t care what you do to me.”

A tendon stood out in Regan’s jaw as he clenched his teeth and released a pent-up breath in a huff. “Fine. Tie him up. And keep a gun on Gabrielle at all times. Let’s go find that gem.” His friend nodded and complied, pulling my hands roughly behind my back while Regan took Gabby by the arm, dragging her ahead.

I knew making myself useful was the best way not to get shot, but every time Regan consulted me about some aspect of the map, or the trail ahead, I had to force the truth out. Helping him find my treasure was worse than knowing Gabby would try to swipe it given the first chance.

“Just like old times, isn’t it?” Gabby whispered while Regan studied the map. I rolled my eyes.

“Oh I don’t know, usually it’s you who ties me up and tries to steal from me.”

She giggled quietly. “Don’t tell me you minded it all the time.”

“I certainly mind now.”

“Relax. I have a plan.” She winked, which did nothing to reassure me.

“I don’t need your help. Trusting you is what got me into this. It’s what always gets me into messes like this.”

Her eyes flashed angrily. “And I hardly begged Everett to find you. But Mr. Misogynist over there didn’t believe a woman could guide him to the gem, even if she’s been adventuring longer than he’d been alive. No, he wanted a second opinion. It was hard enough to get him to bring me along in the first place.”

“Why not just steal his plane ticket?” I asked sarcastically.

 “The man is almost more paranoid than he is stupid. In fact, I’m surprised he’s let me out of his sight for this long.” It was like watching a movie. I watched Gabby’s spine straighten as she sensed him walk up behind her.

“Having a nice chat, are we?”

“Hardly. Have you talked to her for more than five minutes? It’s infuriating.”

Gabby made a face, but didn’t respond, Regan’s hand tight on her arm. “Well, if you’re finished flirting, I believe we’re almost to our destination.”

“Flirting!” we said in unison.

“Not since 1920,” Gabby protested. I stared at her.

“What are you talking about?” Regan demanded, looking confused. But if Gabby stared at me any harder, my head would have exploded. And I got it.

“You’re mad, O’Connell. I haven’t been interested in you since the 1870s, Paris.”

“Paris! You were a boar then. Left me in a catacomb.”

“You fell. After running into me.” I knew where we were now. I’d been closer than I thought before.

She nodded. “Of course. Now I remember.”

Regan, still staring between us, never saw her rush at him. He fell right off the trail. Down the steep hill. And merrily over the edge of a cliff. I doubted he had anything to protect him when he hit the water.

Regan’s friend stared at her wildly, swinging his gun up. Before he could fire, I shoved her to the ground, losing my balance with my hands tied. I felt the bullet crack against my shoulder, but thanks to the protection charm, it didn’t break the skin. The bruise throbbed though. Fear won out over loyalty, and the man ran back the way we’d come.

“Are you okay?” Gabby asked, rolling me off of her and prodding the hole in my jacket.

“I think so. Although, you realize that moron you shoved of the cliff had the map, don’t you?”

“Which one?”

“Very funny. Now what?”

“Well, I figured we’d find this blasted gemstone. We came all this way.” Grinning, she held up the map. It was a little worse for wear, but still readable.

“Golden Gabby and her sticky fingers.”

She laughed. “You know that’s right.” She pulled me to my feet. “I still don’t need you, you know.”

“Nor I you.” But she never dropped my hand.