Write it Down

Submitted into Contest #46 in response to: Write a story that takes place in a writer's circle.... view prompt

4 comments

Fantasy Adventure

The monotonous voice droned on.

“…… the princess’s hair rippled down her back and then, although she had no reason to, she turned and saw…..”.

What she turned and saw, George didn’t know as his attention wandered.

Glancing around the room he looked at each person gathered in the circle, all holding tightly onto their own manuscripts, awaiting their turn. Most of them were staring vacantly straight ahead of them, rousing every few minutes to smile or nod, before drifting back to their own imagination.

Still the monotonous voice droned on.

The only person listening, her best friend, was sitting with her chin leaning on her hands, her lips slightly parted, a look of wonder on her face.

Trying not to laugh, George looked away.

The large clock on the wall was ticking slowly. The sound adding to the dreariness.

As he watched, it stopped, the big hand only moments away from the session ending.

Sighing, and then wishing he hadn’t as the reader paused to glare at him over the top of her paperwork, he glanced as casually as he could at his mobile.

The time was the same as the clock and, even though he stared at it for what seemed forever, it didn’t change.

A drop of cold water landed on top of his head making him jump. It was followed by another and then another, one running down the collar of his shirt, making him shiver.

Looking up at the ceiling, a bubble of water was growing , about to explode.

“Hey, do you see that?”, George asked the lady sitting next to him.

She continued to stare straight ahead, her eyes glazed.

“Hey, did you….’, he started to say, tapping her gently on the shoulder but stopped as the bubble burst.

“Watch out!”, he yelled, leaping up and throwing himself into the middle of the group, rolling and somehow landing on his feet, dropping his own manuscript, the pages scattering.

Water cascaded from the ceiling, splashing the people who remained seated, staring in front of them.

The reader coughed and glared at him again.

“You know, we all listen patiently to your story”, she snapped, before continuing to drone.

Shivering as the water started to swirl around his ankles, George looked between her and her best friend who resumed her pose.

“But what about the water?”, he asked.

No one answered or even looked at him.

“Hello’, he asked, staring at first one person and then another,’ can anyone hear me?”.

A loud sound, like a foghorn, echoed around the room.

George looked around wildly.

What was that?

The water was continuing to rise rapidly, it was almost at his knees. His clothing was soaked, sticking to his skin, and his hair which had been brushed carefully beforehand, dripped into his eyes.

The foghorn sounded again, louder, closer, than before.

The light bulb above his head started to flash and then died, leaving him in darkness, the torrent of water still flooding into the room.

A faint mist started to appear from the surface of the water, growing thicker and spreading until it surrounded him.

Cautiously George walked a few steps and swung his arms out, trying to reach for another person.

“Hello? Is there anyone else there?”, he asked, his voice wavering as he sensed he was on his own. Even the monotonous voice had gone, drowned out by the sounds.

“The princess will never finish her story at this rate”, George muttered to himself.

The water was growing colder. He wrapped his arms around himself trying to keep warm. His fingertips were freezing. He could see his breath in front of his face.

The foghorn sounded again, louder than before and then a fishing boat, it’s hull painted a bright red, appeared through the mist, two men in yellow, waterproof jackets hanging over the bow, old fashioned lanterns held in their hands.

George felt the blood drain from his face as the light from the lanterns shone on him.

“Oh, there you are!’, one of the men yelled,’ we’ve been looking for you!”.

Silently, George pointed at his own chest.

“Yes, you!’, the other man said impatiently as they came closer,’ how many monster hunters do you think we have?”.

George continued to point at himself.

“Well, don’t just hang around there like some guppy fish! Get on board!”, they both yelled, throwing a rope over the side at him.

Instinctively, he caught it. It felt rough in the palm of his hands.

“Hold tight!”, the men yelled and, before he could think what else to do, they heaved on their end.

“Ahhh!”, he screamed as he felt himself flying through the air.

Landing on the deck with a thud, he stared up at the two men as they leant over him.

“What do you think you were doing out there anyway?”, one of them asked.

The other laughed, clapping him on the back,” Ah, you’re the best monster hunter we’ve had. Going out in the water to find it”.

“Monster?”, George asked, wishing the two of them would move further away. The smell of fish and body odor was almost overpowering.

“Monster ahoy!”, another voice, yelled.

The two men reached down and grabbed him by the arms, dragging him up and pulling him with them.

George looked out at the water. Large waves were crashing down against the boat making it rock backwards and forwards, and side to side. He felt his stomach heave as the water landed on the deck, further soaking him. The mist was no longer thick and he could see the clouds above, dark and grey. A bolt of lightening shot over the top of him.

Trying to move his feet, he felt them slide from underneath him, the deck too slippery.

“Watch out!”, one of the men yelled, making a grab for him.

George felt himself thrown from the boat by an enormous wave, and land back in the water.

He gasped as he became submerged, kicking out and struggling to reach the surface, the water entering his lungs.

He’d give anything to hear the two men.

Hell, he’d give anything to hear the monotonous voice again, and the never ending story about the princess.

Something tugged on his foot.

Glancing down, his arms still thrashing around, George felt as if his heart stopped beating.

A creature was holding onto him with a tentacle, it’s many tentacles moving easily through the water.

It’s one eye stared at him, unblinking.

A row of shiny teeth gleamed in the tiny amount of light that shone down from the surface.

George opened his mouth but no one could hear him as he screamed.

Water filled his mouth as he struggled to free his foot, the creature dragging him down to the bottom.

“…..and then the dragon, whose name was Percy, slowly walked out from behind the castle where he’d been napping……”.

George jumped as he opened his eyes, his snoring so loud that it had woken even him.

Glancing around, he looked at the other people.

They were all staring at him, the lady next to him grinning.

Blushing a dark red, he shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

How long had he been asleep for?

He glanced up at the clock. It still showed the same time but the second hand was slowly moving.

A drop of cold water landed on the top of his head.

Impatiently, he ran his hand though his hair, rubbing the water away.

The drop was followed by another and then another, one running down the collar of his shirt, making him shiver.

Looking up at the ceiling, a bubble of water was growing , about to explode.

George felt the blood drain from his face and a cold shiver, nothing to do with the water, ran down his spine.

“Oh no”, he muttered.

June 14, 2020 05:00

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4 comments

Nandan Prasad
11:52 Jun 22, 2020

This story sent a chill up my spine. The narration is really good and the ending is brilliant imagination! Loved it! Also, can you please review my stories, if you have the time? Thanks! Good luck!

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14:27 Jun 21, 2020

Oooh, I love the implications of a never-ending, Groundhog Day daydream in a boring writing group meeting. Your idea is unique and creative with the character that is trapped in the imaginations of his fellow authors. One suggestion I have is that instead of the two men who find George immediately calling him a "monster-hunter" and "the best monster-hunter we ever had," I would use more vague terms, like a made-up word for monster-hunter and some more natural dialogue like, "You think we can take down the Kraken without you, eh?" Something l...

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Vicky S
00:17 Jun 22, 2020

Thank you so much for the comment.

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Batool Hussain
10:28 Jun 21, 2020

Hey Vicky! Great story:) Mind checking my recent story? Thanks.

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