155 comments

Drama

I woke up floating and saw my own body lying down on the back, eyes tightly shut, and hands put together on top of the flat stomach.

Filled with curiosity, I flew around, observing my body that was in a black dress. The long sleeves covered my entire arms, hiding all the scars. The scars that were also on the pale face, making me stretch my hands to touch it. Yet, I couldn’t feel a thing. 

Letting out a deep sigh, I had no choice but to keep observing my own body. 

Until this one man came.

A man that I knew very well. The man who wore the black robe, the one whom I always saw for the last eighteen years. The man who gazed at the body lying inside the nicely engraved wooden box with neither a smile nor words.

I stared at the man, knowing very well that he couldn’t notice my presence. I observed his wavy red hair and dark brown eyes; the same one as mine. I examined the shape of his lips, his nose tip and his high nose bridge, then turned to see the face on my lifeless body, only to realize how similar we were.

Yes, similar, in terms of physical appearance. Ironically, our relationship wasn't that great.

I remembered that he was a busy man. He wasn't there when I needed him, even from when I was a kid.

"Papa, play with Bella, please?" 

"Maybe later. Papa is busy preparing a sermon."

"Sermon? What's that?"

"Papa's work. Now, go and play by yourself, okay?"

Change the sermon to midweek worship practice, church leader meeting, morning prayer, group bible study, Sunday service, and funeral service. You get the point: he was never available to spend time with me.

Also, he was overly strict. He expected me to obey everything he said, although he was asking for something unreasonable, to the extent that it annoyed me.

“Pa, just letting you know I’m going to a party with my cheerleader squad tonight,” I messaged him during my lunch break.

“You are going nowhere tonight, my dear. Stay at home.” In just a few minutes, the man had sent me a text back. The text that made me boil in anger. The text that made me excuse myself from my friends, walked to the secluded area behind the school building and dialled his number.

“What? Why can’t I go to the party?” I spoke as soon as I heard his greetings.

“I just feel it’s going to be unsafe. I can imagine your friends getting rowdy, drinking all night until you’re all wasted.”

“I can assure you it’s safe, Papa.”

“Hm…, well, I’ll let you go as long as you come back home by 10.”

His reply made my jaw drop in disbelief. “What? You're unreasonable, Papa! The party is going to start at 8, and you want me home by 10? They're going to call me a loser! I might even get bullied for this, you know? Do you want me to suffer?”

“You're the one being unreasonable! You’re comparing me to your friends; some strangers over a family member who took care of you since you were born?” He continued his nonsense preaching about my ungrateful behaviour. I rolled my eyes at his long reply, cursing him inside my mind, waiting for him to stop talking.

“Ugh, you never understand me! Fine, whatever you say, I’m still coming to the party tonight!”

Change the party to trivial matters like my cheerleader uniform, the length of my shorts, my newly bought swimwear, and the new piercing that I got. You get the point: debates, arguments, and fights were common occurrences between us.

To top that, he didn't even bat an eye when I told him I got a boyfriend.

“Sure, Kevin has a good attitude and looks trustworthy,” he commented, then glued his eyes back to read his book as if it was nothing special.

This reply made me realize a lot of things about our relationship.

This man never worried about my feelings; he only paid attention to how I acted toward him.

This man couldn’t care less about what’s going on with my life; he didn’t put me as his top priorities in life.

This man simply didn’t love me, his one and only daughter. At least that’s how I felt.

But what I saw today proved that wrong.

Because the man in front of me stretched his hands, gently caressing my pale face, slowly moving his fingertips from one cut to another.

Because the man who never looked sad for as long as I could remember, removed his hands from the cold body, covered his eyes with his right elbow, and started shedding tears. 

Because the man finally calmed down, dried his tears, then took the powerless hand of the girl into his and started talking to the dead body in this white-walled room.

“I never thought you would pass away before me.” Oh, neither did I, Papa.

“The past four days after the car accident, I started to think more about you, and realized that I knew nothing.” Same, Papa; I also feel I knew nothing about your actual feelings.

“Life introduced us. Yet my busy lifestyle was stopping me to know you more.” I’m partly at fault; I was busy partying with my friends and going on dates with my boyfriend instead of getting close to you.

“I’m sorry.” I’m sorry too, Papa.

“Pastor Gerald?” A familiar voice called the man in front of me. My eyes followed the source of the sound, only to see my sweetheart, Kevin, dressed in a black shirt and pants.

The man gave a faint smile to the boy, gestured him to wait at where he stood. The man then kissed the weak hand, placing it back, and looked at the girl inside the coffin for one last time.

"Goodbye, Bella, my beloved daughter. May God be with you until we meet again in Heaven.”

And the man in the black robe twirled the purple sash around his neck, walked towards Kevin, ready to start my funeral.

And with a heavy heart, with an inaudible voice, I muttered a reply.

Goodbye, Papa.

August 28, 2020 01:58

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155 comments

B.T Beauregard
13:54 Aug 31, 2020

Great job!! A really unique idea. I haven’t read the other stories in this series, but I’ve been inspired to check them out. :)

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Deborah Angevin
09:43 Sep 01, 2020

Really appreciate it if you do check them out! Thank you for enjoying this one ;)

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B. W.
13:01 Aug 31, 2020

Okay i really liked this story and you did a good job with it ^^ i think i might go and look at some more of your stories later after it. you should continue to make more stories they'd be great like the other ones. you know what? i'm going to give this a 10/10

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Rayhan Hidayat
12:39 Aug 31, 2020

Oh this was quite tragic. Passing away before your elders always sucks. Solid and concise writing, the message really came through. Now I have to go back and read the stories in this series that I missed 😅 Keep it up!

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Kristin Neubauer
17:40 Aug 30, 2020

Great job, Deborah! Your last story, about the traffic lights, was so strong that I understood immediately that this was a sequel. I love how you are weaving these elements all together, especially the back story of Bella's life. It gives her such dimension. Can't wait for the next!

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Deborah Angevin
09:42 Aug 31, 2020

Thank you for enjoying the stories, Kristin! Glad to see you enjoy this Bella's background story :D

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16:03 Aug 29, 2020

Ahhhh this was AMAZING!!! I love these color stories...and it was so interesting seeing that conversation the green-eyed girl heard through BELLA’s POV!! Awesome jooooob!

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Deborah Angevin
09:43 Aug 31, 2020

Thank you for checking this out, Aerin! :D

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Saron Mengistu
10:52 Aug 29, 2020

Love this story!! So good to see things from Bella's eyes. Also amazing to see that under all that beauty and popularity was a broken girl with hurt and a not so perfect life. Also good to see the improvement in dialouge!! Loving the progress, Angevin. "And with a heavy heart, with an inaudible voice, I muttered a reply." Too much of 'with' in this sentence. Try 'And with a heavy heart and an inaudible voice, I muttered a reply.' Other than the above, this is great! Also. I didn't like Bella. I thought she was this flaky shallow typic...

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Deborah Angevin
09:44 Aug 31, 2020

Yes, you got the characterisation of Bella perfectly! Thank you for your feedback on the dialogues too, Saron!

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03:12 Aug 29, 2020

Ohh, this was nice Deborah! You're getting really creative with these sequel stories🙃 A nice way to continue it. Once again, Brava! I loved this! P.S. would you mind readingy recent, "Nut Judge"? Thanks!!!

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Deborah Angevin
09:44 Aug 31, 2020

Thank you for enjoying the story, Chimamaka! Yes, I will check yours out :D

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10:56 Aug 31, 2020

Thanks! :D

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This is such a sweet heartbreaking story. Your gentle way of words really settled well in this story. I could picture the story as I read, great job Deborah! :)

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Deborah Angevin
09:45 Aug 31, 2020

Thank you for your kind words, Melony! I'm glad I can convey the imagery well :)

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Your welcome!

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Doubra Akika
00:04 Aug 29, 2020

I loved this so much, Deborah! Purple’s my favourite colour😂. The whole tone of the story was sad, but it wasn’t horribly sad. It’s sad that her and her father never got to understand their love for each other when she was alive. You did an amazing job with this as usual! The last line is amazing! Stay safe!

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Deborah Angevin
09:47 Aug 31, 2020

Thank you for enjoying this, Doubra! I agree, the sad part about it is the fact that they never had the chance to make up with each other when Bella was still alive...

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Doubra Akika
10:14 Aug 31, 2020

Yeah. And it was my pleasure!

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17:44 Aug 28, 2020

Aww this story is sooo sad! This might be one of my favorites, especially since purple’s one of my favorite colors! Keep writing!

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Deborah Angevin
22:30 Aug 28, 2020

Thank you for reading this, Imaan! I'm sorry it's a sad story for your favourite colour :')

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Peggy Gerber
14:12 Aug 28, 2020

This was a very unique way to explore the prompt. Beautifully done. So sad she couldn’t understand her father’s feelings for her in life.

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Deborah Angevin
22:30 Aug 28, 2020

Glad to see you enjoying the story, Peggy :D

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Jen Park
10:32 Aug 28, 2020

Oh, so this was the phone call was all about! To the girl of the 'Yellow Light'(by the way, did you mention the protagonist of Yellow Light anywhere? I don't know how to call her.) the overheard phone call would have been easy to be misunderstood. I feel so bad for Bella, who didn't make up with her father until death, and died in her glorious youth. The more the details of the story uncovers, the more I think that this story is scratched and stuffed with couples of misunderstandings. Bella and her 'stalker' misunderstood each other, and Bel...

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Deborah Angevin
22:33 Aug 28, 2020

You got that right; I haven't named the protagonist of the Yellow Light so far! And yes, I'm planning to write a story to explain Kevin's background. At this point of time, I'm just waiting for the right prompt to submit to :D

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Yolanda Wu
06:20 Aug 28, 2020

So, this story made me sad, especially those last lines. Your writing just has the ability to evoke so many emotions in me, it's probably your descriptions and your ability to capture the voice of the character. I also chose the same prompt, so if you wouldn't mind, I would love to hear your feedback. Always amazing work, Deborah!

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Deborah Angevin
22:33 Aug 28, 2020

Thank you for your kind words, Yolanda! Sure, I will check yours out too!

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Deborah Angevin
02:08 Aug 28, 2020

To those who read my previous stories: another one for the colour series! (I'm naming them as "To All Colours In The World" :D) To those who haven't read my previous submissions: enjoy this one as a standalone story! Alternatively, check the series out ;)

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23:43 Dec 17, 2020

Hey Deborah! I really miss your stories🥺! Are you gonna post on reedsy anytime soon?

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Deborah Angevin
11:13 Jun 25, 2021

Hi Ugochi, I'm back at Reedsy! :D

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20:29 Jun 29, 2021

Yay!!

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Amogh Kasat
08:53 Aug 30, 2020

Actually, I read it but forgot to comment. As all-time it's an amazing story. I am following to on Wattpad

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Deborah Angevin
09:42 Aug 31, 2020

Thanks for checking and following me out on Wattpad! What's your handle? I'll follow you back :D

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Amogh Kasat
16:11 Aug 31, 2020

My username in Wattpad is Amogh228 and thanks for your comment

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Deborah Angevin
09:40 Sep 01, 2020

Followed you there!

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Amogh Kasat
15:19 Sep 01, 2020

Ok

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The Cold Ice
03:06 Aug 29, 2020

Super story.I liked the ending so much.Great job👍keep it up.Waiting for your next story.

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Deborah Angevin
09:45 Aug 31, 2020

Thank you for reading and enjoying it, Sahittian! :D

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The Cold Ice
09:48 Aug 31, 2020

You are welcome.

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