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Speculative Funny

Gita kicks off her sandals and squishes her toes in the sand. There aren't any beachgoers to worry about at this hour so she can relax. "You know," she says, tone conversational. "I wasn't so sure about going on this trip at first. Fire elemental plus water tends to be a volatile mix." She crouches to gather her sandals. "Though it is odd the trail led here."

"Because this is a wrong turn," Cyprian says. He crosses his arms. "You went left. We need not need to go left." He was still debating why he chose to get up at this hour to help track down treasure they may not even find.

"What are you talking about?" Gita demands. "We obviously had to go left!"

"No, that was the wrong way. Did you not listen to the instructions at all?" Cyprian asks. He runs a hand through his hair. "You have no sense of direction."

"You're wrong," Gita argues, bristling. "I was paying far closer attention than you were, Mr. Gaze-Into-The-Distance!"

"What?" Cyprian gestures around them. "If you're so right, then tell me, do you see any treasure hidden around here?"

"No," Gita says with the utmost patience she can summon. "Because treasure isn't left in plain sight!"

Cyprian huffs. "Then tell me where you want to start digging?" He knew for sure that the treasure was not in this stretch of beach. As lovely as it was, this was all wrong.

"I'll tell you when we get there," Gita says. She stomps off down the beach in a huff.

He glares after her. "That is the wrong way!" His littlest sister could tell this is not where a self-respecting pirate would bury his treasure. It was too in the open. Too close to the water. And it was all wrong.

"Shush, spare digger!" Gita cries. She scans the beach, looking for anything a supernatural pirate would use to mark their buried treasure. "It may be buried closer to the water," she muses. Gita pauses to peer into the water as it comes up to tickle her feet. "Does it count as burying if they sunk it?" She asks.

"Maybe, that's why I suggested we look in the cove. You know in the water!" Cyprian calls after her. He had no idea why he agreed to this whole charade of an adventure. 

"We can look in the cove after," Gita insists. "Tons of people have looked in that cove already, though, so I'm sure it's not there."

"That's why the map said to check the Coral Cove, not the Fauna Cove." He marches after her when he realizes she has no intention of slowing down so he can keep up.

"Coral Cove wasn't on the map!" Gita can feel herself starting to steam, so she sidesteps like a crab to be out of the water's reach.

"Not on the updated one but the one from a few centuries ago it was! Before, it was considered too unsafe for the public after that whole shark thing." He hurries down the hill after her. Cyprian keeps his steps small, not liking how small the path was and how high they now were above the rocky water below.

Gita skids to a stop, wobbling a bit due to the sand. "That wasn't in the briefing!"

"No, but it is in history." Cyprian nearly collides with her when he finally catches up. "I grew up around the docks before my parents were killed. I heard a lot of seafaring stories and talked to a lot of fishermen. We ate a lot of fish."

"So that's why you came along." Gita scowls up at him. "You could have said you'd be helpful sooner."

"I told you this was the wrong way. I told you in the car. I told you when we parked. I told you when we got out of the car. I told you when we went down the path. I told you at the beach. When exactly did I not tell you?" Cyprian asks, crossing his arms.

"No, no," Gita argues, wagging her finger at him. "You've said I was wrong this whole time, not that you were helpful for more than digging." She realizes how close they're standing when she pokes his arm. "I'm not wrong," she adds for good measure.

"What? You are literally going the wrong way. And I am very helpful. You don't listen." He points at her. "That is not my fault."

"We don't know I'm wrong yet!" Gita insists. She turns, careful thanks to the narrow path, and continues down the hill. She'd show him! 

"Fine! When you find the treasure, you can call me!" Cyprian yells after her. He waits a few minutes then sighs. "Wait up!"

Gita looks up from where she was sitting in the surf. "I thought I saw something glowing," she explains when Cyprian reaches her. She holds up a shell. "This was the culprit."

"Oh, wow, we have really found treasure now. Maybe we can talk to the ocean with it." Cyprian looks around her towards the water. "Maybe the ghost of the pirate will answer."

Gita stares at him for a heartbeat. "Wow," she says. "That was very unbecoming of you."

Cyprian shrugs. "You aren't the only one that could win the prize for sarcasm."

"Aw, that's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me." Gita stands and thrusts the shell into his hands. "Give that to your sister. She might like it." She sets off again before he can respond.

He sighs and puts the shell into his pocket. "You do know they'll fight over this, right?"

"Then keep an eye out for more glowing lights!" Gita calls back.

"Alright." He's never met someone more argumentative. He'll just have to wait for her to prove herself wrong. The path on their right was steeper, taking them up a rocky incline that he nearly lost his footing on twice. He had excellent coordination and grace, but this was almost more than his feet could take, yet Gita kept going like it wasn't even bothering her. "You're going to get us lost."

"What?" Gita calls, the wind choosing that moment to pick up. She half turns to see him lagging behind. She sighs and backtracks. "What?" She repeats.

"You. Are. Going. To. Get. Us. Lost!" He emphasizes each word, so maybe she will listen. "And I can't really afford to be lost. I'm a single parent. You take me out of the picture, then there will be no parent."

Gita studies him for a bit. Cyprian is a lot of things. Stubborn, argumentative, snappy, sarcastic... but he'd gone along with her despite his protests, and he did have more waiting on him back home than she did. A lot more. She sighs. "I still don't think I'm wrong," she says, "but maybe we can go back to safer ground."

"My boys will be so proud you didn't kill their dad with your wrong turn." Cyprian sighs. "Look, if you want to look here, we can. I still don't think I'm wrong, but we can see. If it'll prove to you that you're wrong."

"It's not a wrong turn!" Gita insists. "Whatever. We're wasting time arguing. Let's just go to the historic cove and see what we can find. Which is probably nothing!" She slips by him and starts back the way they came.

"And when it's something, you can realize you're wrong!" he yells back at her. 

Gita grumbles all the way to the flattest part of the beach. Once there, she's surprised by how calm she feels. Yes, Gita was frustrated. Yes, she was positive she's right, and Cyprian's wrong. And, yes, they've done nothing but bicker the entire time, but... Gita smiles to herself. She'd be lying if she said she wasn't having fun.

May 20, 2021 02:12

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RBE | Illustrated Short Stories | 2024-06

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