Submitted to: Contest #110

Little Casanova Town Diner

Written in response to: "Set your story in a roadside diner."

Asian American Creative Nonfiction Friendship

I watched the downpour pound away at the old gas pumps through the window. They were already rusted from however many years they’ve stood there, barely covered by the awning hanging overhead. Must have been about seventy years by now. My chin resting on my palm, I sighed into the silence of Little Casanova Town Diner, just outside the town.

“Nice weather out there,” called a voice a few rotating stools away. I turned around to look at the young man with pretty, silver hair and a kind smile. A dark silver, almost like he was going gray despite looking twenty-four or five at most.

“I guess,” I said quietly. He raised a silver eyebrow at me like he was confused.

“I was being sarcastic,” he said.

“Oh.” I nodded quietly. I turned back to my little mug of tea that had gotten cold by then. How long had I been looking out the window for that to happen?

“I’m Nathan. What’s your name?”

“Heejin,” I responded.

“Heejin? That’s a weird name. Does it mean something?” I looked over at him again and noticed he had golden eyes.

“I don’t know. It’s just a name. It’s Korean.”

“Oh, I see.” He turned his gaze to the swinging door that led to the kitchen in the back of the diner as the only server and cook for that night came out with a light blue plate. He walked toward me gently set the plate down in front of me.

“Here’s your usual, Heejin.”

“Thank you, Jay.”

He picked up my mug of cold tea as he asked in his Louisianan accent, “want me to get you a fresh cup, darlin’?” I nodded. Jay turned and walked the few steps to swing door and passed through it. I noticed Nathan watching the exchange with curiosity.

“You know him?” I nodded in response to his question. “So are you like a regular here?”

“I come here every night after work.”

“Ah, I see,” Nathan said with a smile. Jay came back with a different mug with steam rolling into the air above it.

“Her you are,” He said jovially as he set the drink down in front of me. “Anythin’ else you need before I go back to slackin’ off,” he joked.

“Nope.” He returned to the kitchen with his friendly smile. I looked down at my grilled cheese sandwich and little bowl of tomato soup sitting on the plate. My stomach growled a little, barely audible over the rain.

“‘Feed me, Heejin,’” Nathan said in a high-pitched voice. I glanced his way. “Your stomach is yelling at you. You should probably listen to it.”

He turned back to his own plate of half-eaten food and cup of some type of pop. I picked up the first triangle of my sandwich and dipped it carefully into the red-filled bowl. My usual order always comforted me. After having come here night after night for a few months, Jay picked up on the routine I had and had gotten to know me a little in the few years that followed. We had very different backgrounds. He came from Louisiana up to this little midwestern Wisconsin town with his dad when he was young after his mom was killed in a hate crime. I was born in Korea and brought to the United States to this little midwestern Wisconsin town before I turned three. He grew up going to prestigious private schools that you have to take tests to get into. I went to run-down public schools. Now he works part-time in the Little Casanova Town's Diner just outside Casanova, Wisconsin to pay his online college tuitions that his dad agreed to help pay for half of, and I come in to see him every night after my shift at the factory, ordering the same thing and meeting different people that come in from time to time.

I polished off my sandwich and began to eat (drink?) the rest of my soup, adding the occasional bland saltine cracker to spice it up. I remembered the pretty man with the silver hair and turned my head to find those golden eyes again. Nathan had moved to the seat next to me in the time I was focused on eating my meal. He didn’t look at me when I turned, just casually kept eating his burger. Having no conversation to bring up, I went back to quietly finishing my soup and tea. Nathan had a strangely comforting presence, so I didn’t mind the sudden closeness. And I liked the silence. People always have this annoying need to fill quiet moments with conversation like they’re anxious from them. Sitting with someone in silence is an underappreciated experience. After another ten minutes passed, the silence was broken.

“You enjoy the quiet too?” We turned to look at each other, almost in unison.

“Yeah, I do,” Nathan responded. “I like it when it’s quiet. Especially on days like this when you can hear every drop of rain.” He pointed at the window I was focused on earlier. “It’s nice, you know?” I nodded.

“Underappreciated,” I said.

“Exactly! Nobody recognizes the value of a good silence these days.”

“You say that like you’re a cranky old man who yells at kids to get off his lawn every day.” Nathan hunched his back made an angry face.

“Well, these damn hooligans these days, always being all loud,” he said in a mock-elderly voice, “no appreciation for the days when we sat around playing with sticks in the yard.” We laughed at his old-timer jokes for a little while. Eventually, he returned to his normal voice and raised his hand toward my head. He gently patted the top of my head.

“What’s that for?”

“You just seemed like you needed a good pat on the head.” I blinked at him for a moment.

“You’re odd, Nathan.” He nodded at me with a big grin.

“Life’s no fun when you aren’t.”

Suddenly, the swing door opened, and Jay walked out, heading towards me. He reached out and took my empty plate and mug. He turned around to set them on the back counter and opened a glass cloche on a cake stand. He placed a slice of Chocolate Peanut Butter Pie on a small black plate and passed it to me along with a small metal fork. He placed his hands on the counter and looked at me with his usual kind smile.

“Finishin’ touch of the night,” he said. I picked up the fork and sliced into the tip of the pie.

“Is he real, Jay?” Jay looked down the counter through the small, empty diner before turning back to me.

“Not this one, Heejin.” I nodded sadly and took a small bite. “What was this one’s name?”

“Nathan,” I said.

“An’ only one this time?”

“Yeah. No other voices, either. Just him.”

“Was he a nice one, at least?” I nodded and continued to chip away at my little slice. Jay patted my head gently like he always did by this time. “They’ll stop soon, darlin’. Them voices gotta go away sometime.” We smiled at the optimistic statement, and I spent the rest of my night like I always did: sitting in the old gas station-turned Little Casanova Town Diner just outside of a little midwestern town in Wisconsin, talking to my best friend who always gave me comfort when my schizophrenia was at its worst.

Posted Sep 10, 2021
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50 likes 14 comments

Nina Flanagan
14:34 Sep 14, 2021

I liked the twist at the end, but I don’t think you need to point to a specific diagnosis. Let the reader decide/interpret it.

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Allie Mae Sakry
19:26 Sep 14, 2021

I get where you’re coming from for letting the reader interpret the story, and I originally didn’t plan on specifying that Heejin has schizophrenia, but I didn’t want people to see this as a ghost story. The vast majority of people don’t understand what schizophrenia is or how it actually affects people because of how the media and movies portray it, and I wanted to make sure people knew that this is much closer and much more accurate of a portrayal of the disorder to help get better insight for that community that is very misunderstood. I had some friends read before I added the sentence about her disorder, and without me stating what she has they all got the wrong message from the story. So forgive my sort of “hand-holding” of the reader at the end, I just wanted to make sure people didn’t turn the story into something it’s not.

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Nina Flanagan
17:41 Sep 18, 2021

I understand. I have a family member with schizophrenia.

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Jude S. Walko
07:55 Sep 13, 2021

This story is beautiful on many levels. First the tangible; Patter of rain, warm tea, golden silence. But also in its simplicity. The familiar surroundings. The stranger you feel oddly comfortable with, and comfort food.

The horror fan in me thought this was an extremely suspenseful situation from the get go, which is a testament to your superb writing skills at creating that situation so subtly, and so perfectly. I didn't know what was going to happen, but I felt it. The way Jay left Heejin by himself (or alone with a stranger), the causal reference to hate crimes, death, and assimilation into new surroundings. I thought someone would pull a weapon, or an agitated stranger would bust in guns blazing... Little did I know that you were saving the suspense for the M. Night Shamalan style ending.

The whole time Heejin was building his own suspense, inside his own head, yet, like the story, it was oddly familiar and comforting.

I enjoyed it a lot and look forward to more. Also, I never new what a glass cloche was called. I have looked at those things hundreds of times in diner's throughout my life, and never knew. It's always great to broaden the vocabulary, and I am definitely using that word somewhere down the line. So thanks for the story, and thanks for that!

Jude

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Allie Mae Sakry
21:42 Sep 13, 2021

Thank you for the compliments! I was trying really hard to make the situation ambiguous for readers, so depending on their preference or mood they’d interpret the beginning differently and come to the same comforting conclusion at the end.

I will correct you on one thing, though…Heejin is actually a girl. I didn’t even notice that I didn’t specify that through the entire story except in one place (where Jay calls her “darlin’”). I took the name from a female character in a Korean show (“Abyss,” it’s on Netflix if you’d like to watch it), whom she does not resemble in any way, I just liked the name and wanted a little diversity.

But in regards to the feeling of suspense you had while reading with the little essences of comfort sprinkled in, I was hoping at least one reader went that route and not everybody would automatically assume a calm setting, because why would this poor girl not be afraid that late at night with some rando in the diner that she doesn’t remember seeing our hearing enter the place? I know I’d be terrified!

Your welcome for the fun new vocab, and thank you for enjoying the story! 💛

Allie Mae

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Jude S. Walko
02:46 Sep 14, 2021

Amazing. The fact that the character is a woman, makes it even more suspenseful, because all alone late at night with two men, one of which is a stranger who keeps getting in her personal space and initiates physical contact!

Now please excuse me while I go search out a cloche with some red velvet cake inside! =)

Jude

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Skyler Woods
11:48 Dec 08, 2021

I loved your story. Just wanted to say that if you have any fantasy or scary stories that you want me to narrate then follow this link! Also, I'd love to have you as my subscriber!
https://youtube.com/c/AfterDarkFairyTales

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Graham Kinross
10:00 Nov 24, 2021

I really like this. The twist was cool. If you break up some of the bigger paragraphs it will be easier to read. Other than that, awesome story.

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Ruth Smith
04:46 Oct 26, 2021

I really enjoyed this story. You did an excellent job of describing the diner, the rain, the small town feel. I think the contrast of Heejin and Jay was a bit much, however. You didn't need that part in the story, it flows better without it. Or maybe modified a little bit.

Also, you wrote : “Her you are,” He said jovially as he set the drink down in front of me. I am wondering if you meant Here instead of Her.

Over all it is an excellent story with a fantastic ending.

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Lily Rama
22:15 Oct 07, 2021

I love this story! Amazing job! I really liked the twist at the end and thought it was a very good idea to actually include a specific diagnosis-It gave the story a nice informal touch to it :) I really enjoyed all the dialogue too!
Keep writing :)

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Gosiame Njilo
15:14 Sep 21, 2021

I litrally clapped my hand over my mouth. I was not expecting it to end this way, this is downright ingenious. PERIOD. you're brilliant. I often feel bad for my simple writing when I do it like my words aren't exquisite or intricate enough. But this just showed me that simplicity in writing can be just as engrossing as any other. Just WOW!

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Keya J.
17:55 Sep 16, 2021

It was a cute little story, one that gives the readers 'the feel'. The dialogues and pace were perfectly balanced, giving way to the partial reality. The choice of words felt really thoughtful, and overall, the story is well appreciated.

Great job Allie!

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Little Buzzie
12:38 Sep 16, 2021

An excellent story in every respect. The only thing I would even consider changing would be to put a period after "comfort" in the last sentence, leaving us to decide on our own whether it is schizophrenia or a ghost story, but after seeing your response to Ms. Flanagan, I understand your decision.

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Eliza Entwistle
01:01 Sep 15, 2021

An expertly woven story. It flowed well, using dialogue as a way to frame the plot - forming a balance between too much information and not enough. I love plot twists, and I thought you did a good job of setting it up for the darker turn at the end. I think I would have preferred if you maybe reworded the last sentence or something to close it off, but very well done!

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