Big City, Big Dreams

Suitcase in hand, you head to the station. You can’t believe the step you have just taken. Never did you ever think you would have the courage to do this, just pack up and head out like that. The train station appears in the distance. Almost there. You are giddy with excitement and fear. As the cab pulls up by the entrance, you pay the cabbie and step out with your suitcase. 

You walk up to the ticket booth and by your ticket. The man in the booth tells you the train will depart in an hour. You thank him and walk away, feeling the big, goofy grin on your face stretch even wider. In an hour, you will be heading towards your destiny. You find a little café in the station and enter. You order an apple turnover, a glass of milk, and a cup of coffee. You aren’t really hungry, but it is only five in the morning and you have a long train ride ahead of you. 

As you eat your apple turnover and alternately sip your milk and coffee, you allow your mind to drift into a daydream about what is ahead of you. This is a huge step for you, and it is an important one, as well. 

Several hours later, as you step off the train into a brand new city and a brand new life, you feel like shouting out to the world. You have never exhibited this kind of bravery before in your life. Your first order of business is to hail a cab and find a hotel. You step out of the train station and wave down a cab. Step one complete. You tell the cabbie that you are looking for a decent but inexpensive hotel. He says he knows just the place, and you are off. 

Fifteen minutes later you are walking into the hotel lobby. You go up to the desk, check in, and head to your room. You realize suddenly that is one in the afternoon and you are starving. You freshen up and head out to explore and find some lunch. Just down the block you see a lovely little restaurant with tables outside.

You find a table outdoors and sit down. The waiter arrives immediately with a menu and a glass of water. You peruse the menu, and when he returns you place your order. Once your stomach is quieted down, you set off to explore. 

Everything just looks so exciting. You realize some of this is because you are new here, but some of it is just being in a truly big city instead of the small city you came from. One your way back to your hotel, you grab a paper and an apartment finders guide.

Back in your room, you shower and change, order dinner from room service, and sit down to look for apartments. You have a week before your new job starts, and you would like to have an apartment secured by then. When your dinner arrives, you take a break and watch some television.

You wake up the next morning eager to get a jump on your day. You found several apartments to look at, and you want to get started. There is a definite skip in your step as you head out of the hotel. 

You spend your day looking at apartments, and return to the hotel that evening with a little less joy than you had when you left. None of the apartments that you saw were what you were looking for. Well, not true. There was that one that you really liked, but the man passed out in the hall with the needle in his arm was sort of a deal breaker. You have a new newspaper, so you order dinner and begin to go through again, hoping for some new listings.

You have been in this new city for a week now, and it is beginning to not look so shiny and new. You still haven’t found a decent apartment that you can afford, and your new job starts tomorrow. You can’t afford to keep staying in this hotel, but you don’t want to move to a cheaper one because they are pretty raunchy. You know, because you have been looking around.

You take a cab to your new job, a little excited and very much nervous. Right off the bat you wonder if you are in over your head. The receptionist introduces you to an associate that begins rattling off instructions and duties quicker than you can walk, much less take notes. He shows you where to put your purse and jacket, shows you how to log into your computer, rattles off a few more instructions, and disappears. You have no idea what you are supposed to be doing and you feel like crying a little. The day goes by fairly quickly, and soon you are on your way home.

After a couple of weeks, you are settling into the job. You have finally found a tiny, dingy apartment that you can afford. The walls are paper thin and there are numerous pieces of sexual and drug paraphernalia in the hallway, but it is all you can afford for the time being, and it is close to your job so you are able to walk to and from work when the weather is good. It is Friday evening, and your phone rings. It is your friend, Kate, from work. Well, friend may be a strong word since you have only known her for a couple of weeks. At any rate, Kate wants you to go out with her this evening. She doesn’t feel like staying at home, and honestly neither do you. 

The two of you meet up at a club and spend most of the night dancing and drinking and just cutting loose. You have such a good time! This is the best time you have had since you moved here, and you are beginning to feel like things may work out, after all. You take a cab home, go inside, and pour yourself into your favorite pjs, then turn on the tv. You have to turn it up fairly loud because the neighbors are fighting and you can hear everything.

Suddenly, there is a knock at your door. You have no idea who it could be, but you go to answer the door. You open the door and see a man standing there. You ask if you can help him. He needs to borrow a phone. You grab your cell and hand it to him.

On Monday morning, at work, everyone is wondering where you are. You never show up.