Let's just be normal for an afternoon (Also pt.10 of Mutants versus Witches, from Devon's POV).

Devon didn't how to do romance. It was like the whole world had some idea of what "love" looked like and nobody had bothered to explain it to him.

From the unspoken rules of love, and the Godawful romantic movies Elysse had made them watch, Devon learned only one thing: people were dumb.

No girl he'd ever met had been impressed by insults or some guy acting like he knew them better.

"No, she's like, figuring him out. Okay? It's complicated." Elysse had answered her face red when Devon asked. "Stop taking it so seriously!"

Devon scoffed. There wasn't anything complicated about girls swooning over insanely good-looking white guys wearing leather jackets. Someone with piercing blue eyes and the sensitivity of a pigeon shitting on your head.

Okay, but what if you weren't an Abercrombie and Fitch model? Devon didn't think for five seconds that black guys could act like the cigarette smoking, shadow-eyed creeps in these movies. One break in through a sleeping girl's window, or some weird habit of staring at her and Twilight would have ended quite differently.

Yeah, Elysse had made them watch Twilight too (for the "aesthetic" she said). It had been beyond awkward for all of them to sit through it.

But now, Devon had found a girlfriend of his own, and Vanessa made him want to be good at romance. God, that sounded disgusting.

Vanessa had shown up when Devon entered college, far away from everyone, especially Elysse. Whatever thing had been growing between Elysse and Devon...let's just say that meeting Vanessa kind of buried it.

The first time Devon and Vanessa met, both of them hated each other. Devon thought she was some stuck up nerd, and she clearly thought he was obnoxious and dumb.

But there'd been something there, something Devon was pretty sure he'd been imagining until they kissed outside her Biology 341 lecture hall. Vanessa was beautiful, with black hair and piercing green eyes. An adorable accent, and athletic figure, which blew Devon's mind, considering the only workout the girl got was lugging her books from one classroom to the other.

Over time, they bonded in the cafeteria, and Devon enjoyed watching her nose wrinkle when she tried not to laugh.

Slowly, Devon tried to be charming. It worked two percent of the time, and Vanessa always called him out on his bullshit. Sue him, most of his life had been on the run, and most of what he knew about relationships came from Elysse's dumb movies and the internet.

So right now Devon was rummaging around the drawers of their newest home, trying to find a pen so he could sign this goddamn card. He'd chosen a funny one, because there was no way in hell he was giving Vanessa some sappy, over the top card.

In one of the drawers, he found a small, heart shaped box. Devon's eyebrows went up. That worked out great.

He almost cleaned off the dust on his dark pants, but remembered in the last second not to. Earlier that week, Elysse had helped him pick out a necklace. Something that made him a little guilty.

Devon shook his off, going back to his room and putting the necklace in its special, velvet box.

He heard literal howls of laughter and rolled his eyes, making his way to the kitchen to see what the clowns were losing it over.

"And what the hell are you guys going crazy over?" Devon asked as he entered, taking in the situation.

Simin was laughing, arms around her stomach, while Elysse smiled at him, her hair in braids. She looked dressed up and pretty.

Harry raised an eyebrow at him, and Devon buried the thought, glancing at Elysse as she said something.

Simin laughed again and Devon narrowed his eyes. "You guys better not be this weird when Vanessa arrives."

"Aww, Dev, are you two totally, like, in love?" Simin asked in a sickeningly sweet way, proving every day that she was the most annoying person on earth.

Devon groaned, "Jesus, okay, you're banned from saying anything to Vanessa."

Simin grinned viciously, "Scared I'll steal her from you?"

"More like you'll scare her away. She's a psych major, one look at you and she'll know you're crazy." Devon frowned at her.

Harry handed Simin a dish, and Simin winked at Devon, "Well if she's dating you, I think she's into crazy."

This was exactly why he didn't want Vanessa to meet his "family". According to one of his new friends, Mark, girls met the family for evolutionary reasons. No girl wanted to marry into some weird-ass, psychopath-infested family. "Very funny, but seriously guys, nobody can do anything, anything that makes her think-"

Elysse spoke up out of nowhere. "That we're a bunch of superpowered runaways, all living together and hiding from the government?" When Devon gave her an exasperated look, she pouted, which was unbelievably cute. "That's too bad, we were planning on putting on a talent show."

Devon threw up his hands, irritated. Vanessa was going to take one look at this family and run.

Elysse said something about a cover story, and Simin started quoting Mission Impossible.

"Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is tricking Devon's soon-to-be ex-girlfriend into believing we're normal," Simin said robotically.

"Feel free to self destruct now. And by the way, we're all adopted." Devon announced to the room.

He let them have some fun with the idea, knowing he needed them to pull it off.

Elysse smiled then, saying, "-seriously, Devon, we're not gonna embarrass you. We want you and Vanessa to succeed."

Something about this situation was very weird, and Devon watched Elysse make faces at Harry. God knows what the hell that's about.

"Thank you, Elysse, but I didn't think for five seconds that you'd be the problem." Devon smiled at her, trying to ignore Harry's odd, knowing smile.

Simin rolled her eyes at them. "As your sister, Devon, I just want you to know that we accept you, and love you. Give me a hug, big guy." She held out her arms and Harry started laughing.

Devon smiled. "And you wonder why nobody wants to date you."

He knew he'd scored a point, and before Simin could say anything, the door rang.

"Children, please come greet our guest!" John yelled from the front of the house.

Devon moved to let Simin sprint out of the room and saw Elysse staring at him. "You got John to play along?" She asked, gaping at Devon.

"I really like her," He explained to Elysse, blushing for some reason. "I hope you guys get along." Before he knew what he was doing, he squeezed her shoulder and smiled as he left.

Quickly he scribbled a message into the card and brought everything to the living room.

Van looked golden in the light, smiling at John and Harry, and shaking Simin's hand. "Very nice to meet you guys!"

"Devon never stops talking about you." Simin said conspiratorially, and Devon forced himself to smile, seeing his girlfriend grin.

"Hello." Devon went for a handshake, turned it into a hug last minute, and holy shit that was embarrassing.

"Happy Valentines!" Vanessa grinned, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"Everyone's very, uh, excited to meet you." Devon smiled. "Please don't judge me based on them."

"Don't be silly, they're very sweet. Oh! And I brought you guys some wine." Vanessa handed it to John, who accepted it graciously.

Elysse and Van did one of those polite girl hugs, and Vanessa immediately complimented Elysse on her hair.

"Come children, let's wait in the kitchen. Vanessa, I hope you're hungry, we may have gone overboard for you." John winked at Devon, and herded everyone away.

"Last chance to run and never look back." Devon informed her, chuckling dryly.

"Babe, relax, wait 'till you meet my family. I promise it's just as crazy." Vanessa exhaled anxiously, grinning like crazy. "I'm so nervous, but also, stop stressing. It's not a fucking test. I just wanna meet your family."

Devon nodded and Vanessa elbowed him. "So are we gonna keep hiding here?"

Devon rolled his eyes. "Fine, fine. Word of advice though: don't believe a word Simin says."

"Oh, I can't wait to hear all the embarrassing stories!" Vanessa cackled and squeezed Devon's hand, both of them wandering towards the sounds of talking.