Here We Go Again

Submitted into Contest #53 in response to: Write a story about another day in a heatwave. ... view prompt

76 comments

Kids

It was a hot summer Sunday, and I was already ready for winter. I was in my house, a nice two-story suburban home. We lived in a nice neighborhood that had a community pool. There were a lot of nice families and kids here. The thing was, all of my friends that lived here were on vacation. So here I was, bored and at home.


“Mom,” I asked. “Can we please turn on the air conditioner? It’s so humid.”


“No, Claire.” She answered, making cookies in the kitchen. “We need to save money. Go cool yourself off at the pool.”


I pouted. “Mom, I have no one to go with. It’s gonna be so boring.”


“Take Bryan, then.”


“He’s locked in his room, listening to that Hamilton music.”


She turned and looked at me. “Listen, honey. Read a book. Do crafts. There are so many things you can do. Wanna bake with me?”


“No thanks.” I turned and went back to my room.


I have my own room, with turquoise walls. Bryan is my brother, who lives next to my room. I could hear faint traces of Yorktown (The World Turned Upside Down) from Hamilton. I like Hamilton, just not as much as Bryan. He is obsessed with it.


I plopped down on my bed, and looked at my Kindle. I checked the weather app, then groaned. 95 degrees? It’s only June! This was definitely a record. I mean, it normally is hot, but never this hot. I live in Southern California! But of course, we never get snow. We get rain, but not that much. And about once in a million years, we get hail.


I closed the cover of my Kindle and laid on my bed, staring at the ceiling. The ceiling is plain white, and flat. Except for that smoke alarm and the sprinkler. They both pop out.


I got up and went to ask my mom if I was allowed to play on my Kindle.


“Claire, you know the rules.” She said, putting the tray of cookies in the oven.


“Yes mom.” I sighed.


You see, my mom is strict about screen time. I mean, I can use my computer, but not for games. We get about 30 minutes a day, but it has to be after three o’clock. I look at my watch and sigh again. It’s only ten o’clock.


I try doing my doodle book, but I’m too bored. Finally, I put on my bathing suit, and get my towel and goggles. I knock on my brother's door to see if he wants to come.


“Bryan?” I ask. “Do you want to come to the pool and swim?”


“What?” He pauses the music and peeks out.


“Do you want to come to the pool with me?”


“No thanks.” He goes back into his room and unpauses the music. He’s playing It’s Quiet Uptown. That is not my favorite song from Hamilton. It’s quite depressing.


I go downstairs. My mom is on her computer, the cookies cooling on the counter. 


“So you decided to go, after all.” She says, not looking up from her computer.


“Yup.” I said, grabbing a cookie.


“Have fun! Oh, and don’t forget sunscreen!”


“Oops!” I grab a bottle of it. “Thanks.”


I walk out my door and start walking out to the pool. It is only a few blocks away, so it's nice.


We have no lifeguard, so you have to know how to swim. Nobody new has moved here in the past 3 years, so most of us can swim.


When I got to the pool, there were a few families there. It was mostly little kids there, while the parents chatted. I saw another girl there, who looked a bit familiar. I think she went to my school. She was in the deep end, diving and swimming.


I put some sunscreen on, then jump in. Our pool doesn’t have a heater, so it’s cold. But I like the cold shock it gives me when I first jump in.


The other girl swims up to me.


“Hey! You’re Claire, right?” She said.


“Yeah! Sorry, I’m terrible with names. What’s your⎯” 


“I’m Narcissa! Isn’t it hot! I got bored at home, so I decided to come here.”


“It’s super hot! Yeah, I’m extremely bored.”


“Do you like swimming?” Narcissa asked.


“Sure. Mostly just for fun.”


“Cool! I’m on the swim team, so I have to practice a lot. I live a few blocks away.” She points the opposite way where my house is.


“I live a few blocks away, too!”


“Awesome! It’s funny we never run into each other. I’m super busy, so maybe that’s part of it.”


“Cool!”


“I brought some pool rings. Do you want to dive for them?” 


“Sure!” I exclaim. Narcissa is super nice already, but she does talk a lot.


The pool rings were medium sized. They could fit around my head, like a crown. We threw them in the deep end, and dove for them. It was really fun. Narcissa was actually good at diving. She could hold her breath for the longest time.


After that, we relaxed in the chairs that were on the sides of the pool. We talked, and it turns out she loves Hamilton.


“Oh my gosh, it’s like the best musical ever!” She said.


“Yeah...sure.” I reluctantly agreed. “I am not the biggest fan, but my brother is. What’s your favorite song?”


“Ooh, that’s hard. Hmm, maybe Satisfied? I love it, and I figured out how to sing it without messing up!”


Narcissa then launched into a fast rap. She was pretty good at it!


Finally, it was lunchtime.


“I gotta go, Narcissa! It was fun hanging out with you!”


“Yeah, this was really awesome! Maybe we could meet up again sometime!”


“Definitely! See you soon!”


We said goodbye, and I walked back home. When I got there, my mom was cooking lunch.


“How was it?” She asked.


“Awesome! I met a new friend, Narcissa! She is super nice!”


“Oh! Does she live close?”


“Yeah! She lives like a few blocks away from the pool on the other side!”


“Cool, honey! Now lunch is ready! After lunch, I have to work. So please don’t distract me.”


“Of course, mom!”


I went upstairs and took a quick shower. I changed, then ate lunch. I went to my room and plopped down on my bed. I quickly realized I had nothing to do. It wasn’t three o’clock yet.


Here we go again.


August 01, 2020 22:14

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76 comments

Jonathan Blaauw
16:22 Aug 06, 2020

Nice story. You've got such simple, clear way of writing. Last time I commented you told me you are a young writer. But I rather think you should say you're a developing writer, because that's what we all are. And you've got lots of potential. I would like to see you up the stakes a bit for your characters, add in a bit of drama maybe, but that'll come with time. You're on the right track and doing so well. Keep it up!

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Avery G.
16:46 Aug 06, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Shikha ♫ ♪
10:59 Aug 07, 2020

Nice Story, Avery!😊 I read all your stories and they all are really nice. Stay safe & keep writing -D

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Avery G.
15:18 Aug 07, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Scout Tahoe
16:35 Aug 05, 2020

Avery-- Despite what others commented on your story, I can relate. I'm not even allowed to get screen time during the week unless it's writing for Reedsy. Is this story true? Sorry I had to ask because I read your bio and you said you lived in Southern California, and the character in this story lives in Southern California too. Also, while reading your bio, I realized we have a lot in common! I love soccer, writing, art, reading, and Hamilton. Anyways, fantastic story. Stay knee-deep in ink, -Scout

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Avery G.
16:58 Aug 05, 2020

Thank you so much! No, this story is not true. I tend to make my characters similar to me in many ways. It just happens. Oh wow! We have a lot in common! Thank you again!

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Hi, Avery! Like usual for your stories, this was terrific! I loved how the begin first and end looped back together. I have a couple random comments that aren’t really suggestions but I just want to say: 1. Only half an hour of screen time a day?! Poor kids. In quarantine, I spend an hour a day writing CQ #2, over an hour editing CQ #1, maybe and hour or so playing Minion Rush, and at least 2 hours on Reedsy (yep, I’m obsessed). Half a hour is sad, just sad. 2. Playing??? On a kindle???? Please correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t...

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Avery G.
01:12 Aug 02, 2020

Thank you! Okay, so my mom is also strict, and I only get 30 minutes of kindle. I can have my computer most of the day, but mostly for writing stories. Well, I have a kindle, and you can download games and other stuff. I'm guessing some kindles can have games and others can't. I used to have a reading kindle, but it was old. So some kindles have games and stuff while others can't. Otherwise, thank you so much!

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No problem! 😁😁😁

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Sunny 🌼 🖤
22:36 Aug 03, 2020

You poor child. Only 30 minutes of games and entertainment! I could never!

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Avery G.
01:39 Aug 04, 2020

Haha! I get to use reedsy anytime, but still.

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Saron Mengistu
17:57 Aug 03, 2020

You're like me aerin!! 😂😂

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Avery G.
18:55 Aug 03, 2020

Haha!

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Hehe 🤣

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Felicity Anne
21:19 Oct 18, 2020

Avery, I love this story! I totally get the strict screen time, my mom only lets us on screens for an hour a day, and only on weekends. :) I really loved the names you chose, and the connection to Hamilton! I love Hamilton as well! Keep up the good work!

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Avery G.
19:03 Oct 19, 2020

Hi! Thanks! Yes, screen time is the same for me. I also love Hamilton! Thanks again!

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Doubra Akika
16:29 Aug 05, 2020

This is really nice. Your writing suited your approach on the story so much! Great job! Poor her though. Only 30 mins 🤣! I don’t think I would have survive.

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Avery G.
17:00 Aug 05, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Rose C G
21:24 Aug 02, 2020

Nice story. The dialog fits the young girls. I hope you don't mind one simple correction: Kindle needs capital K. 🌹Thank you for following me!~Rose~🌹

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Avery G.
22:27 Aug 02, 2020

Okay thank you! I was wondering about that. No problem!

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Megan Sutherland
17:20 Oct 28, 2020

How did I miss this? lolllll great job, Avery!! (btw my friend is sitting next to me and she's like iT's So CoOl sHe'S fRoM CaLi) hehe. Great story! Talk soon! -Megan S.

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Avery G.
18:56 Oct 28, 2020

Lol!! Thanks so much!!!! haha! Yes, let's talk soon!!!!!!!

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Megan Sutherland
01:33 Oct 29, 2020

How's it been for you lately?? Hehheheheeheehheeh my birthday's tomorroww the 29th!

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Avery G.
14:19 Oct 29, 2020

Good! You? HAPPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEGAN!!!!!

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Megan Sutherland
17:09 Oct 29, 2020

GREAT!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH AVERY!

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C.J 🤍
15:27 Oct 05, 2020

Awesome job 👏🏼😊👍🏻🙂

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Avery G.
18:47 Oct 05, 2020

Thanks!

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01:25 Aug 28, 2020

Haha😂 I loved this. Awesome! Especially the ending. So fun and nice and light. I really love your stories Avery☺️ I MUST confess. I think I'm going to go through ALL of them right now! And it's already my bedtime! You're an awesome writer!🤗😁

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Avery G.
03:00 Aug 28, 2020

Wow, thank you soo much!

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23:22 Aug 28, 2020

You're VERY welcome! It's my pleasure🙃

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Avery G.
02:01 Aug 29, 2020

:)

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Tariq Saeed
12:30 Aug 23, 2020

Your topics are good.

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Avery G.
16:43 Aug 23, 2020

Thank you!

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Rebecca Lee
01:26 Aug 17, 2020

Nice story.

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Avery G.
01:36 Aug 17, 2020

Thank you!

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The Daltons
01:18 Aug 16, 2020

OK, I love ALL of your stories! And I love how you incorporate your liking for Hamilton in this. Also, I've watched and I'm not INTO it, into it, but it's still great! Could you maybe check out my stories?! Thanks! Stay safe!

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Avery G.
01:21 Aug 16, 2020

Thank you! I love Hamilton! I'll check out your stories!

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The Daltons
01:36 Aug 16, 2020

Thank you! I'm also a new writer on Reedsy! I'm a blooming author, but I kinda also came on here for the money (LOL!)

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Avery G.
01:48 Aug 16, 2020

Haha!

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Iona Cottle
21:30 Aug 13, 2020

A nice glimpse into the teenage mind :) It would be interesting to see what you could do with changing the sentence lengths sometimes, mixing it up and having some longer ones for a change of pace.

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Avery G.
00:16 Aug 14, 2020

Thank you so much! I'll keep that in mind!

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Maggie T
21:11 Aug 12, 2020

Nice job! I think you had believable dialogue and the voice of your main character seemed accurate. My main suggestion would be to take the plot somewhere else, introduce a problem the main character has to solve or make her have some kind of realization about her life.

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Avery G.
23:00 Aug 12, 2020

Okay, thank you!

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A.G. Scott
06:13 Aug 09, 2020

Hi! You a good job painting a picture for us. In terms of plot, you should try to add some conflict to make things more interesting. If everyone agrees about everything, there are no problems to solve, and stories are all about solving problems! Hope that helps.

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Avery G.
16:05 Aug 09, 2020

Wow! Thank you so much for this great feedback! That helps so much!

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J.L. Schuhle
03:34 Aug 09, 2020

Great story that felt like a glimpse into a whole summer- like looking in through a window. Very fluid and the resistance to spending time with siblings even when you love them was very relatable.

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Avery G.
16:04 Aug 09, 2020

Thank you!

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J.L. Schuhle
03:34 Aug 09, 2020

Great story that felt like a glimpse into a whole summer- like looking in through a window. Very fluid and the resistance to spending time with siblings even when you love them was very relatable.

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Avery G.
16:04 Aug 09, 2020

Thanks!

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J.L. Schuhle
03:34 Aug 09, 2020

Great story that felt like a glimpse into a whole summer- like looking in through a window. Very fluid and the resistance to spending time with siblings even when you love them was very relatable.

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Avery G.
16:04 Aug 09, 2020

Thank you so much!

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María Barrios
00:39 Aug 09, 2020

Screen time has saved me during this quarantine and even before that due to the state of my country which is why I think this poor kid needs a little more screen time. The internet can save lives lol. That said I liked your story. It felt like a mini TV summer special. Maria

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Avery G.
03:17 Aug 09, 2020

Okay! Thank you!

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