Rejection x 5 (Part 1)

Submitted into Contest #73 in response to: Write about someone who gets proposed to five times on Christmas Eve.... view prompt


Christmas Friendship Romance

โ€œWhat happened all those years ago, you left me cause โ€˜it wouldnโ€™t work outโ€™, I quoted him.

โ€œLookโ€ฆ Nessie.โ€

โ€œVanessa,โ€ I corrected, didnโ€™t want my ex to use my nickname heโ€™d used when we were together years ago.

โ€œVanessa,โ€ He pronounced shyly, keeping his head low.

โ€œIโ€™ve changed, and so have youโ€ฆ itโ€™s almost Christmasโ€ฆ why donโ€™t we make it memorable?โ€

โ€œSo am I just a toy you use whenever and throw?โ€ I questioned, flickering my honey golden eyes to stare at his blank expression.


โ€œStop Jared, weโ€™re doneโ€ฆ Iโ€™m sorry to disappoint you but Iโ€ฆ I canโ€™t,โ€ I shuttered to tell him โ€˜noโ€™, it was hard to ignore his luscious blue eyes drop in frustration. He had kneeled down, wearing his best suitโ€ฆ his coffee brown hair combed with perfection. His eager eyes awaited for my โ€˜yesโ€™.

Unfolding his chosen ring in a velvet box, the sapphire shore like the moon, I had shed a tear or two in the process. It was beautiful, extraordinaryโ€ฆ I so wanted to feel it's cold metal on my ring finger, smiling back to look at the man of my dreamsโ€ฆ yet that wasnโ€™t the way it went.

Iโ€™d denied his proposal, shunning him away from my life. I wasnโ€™t one of those girls who fell for looks and money.ย 

I had a spine, I didnโ€™t want to be used. Sucked for my money and fame. Jaredโ€™s face fell in dismay. His ears turned bright red as he shrugged, walking off before I said anything else.

โ€œYouโ€™ll be sorry,โ€ He murmured, giving me the stink eye before throwing the ring; that precious piece of jewel into the trash. I saw a lady who had been the witness of his failure faint in surprise.

I rolled my eyes, walking away from his annoying presence.ย 

Guys are all over me ever since Iโ€™d become a backup dancer. Yes, Iโ€™m just a โ€˜backupโ€™ but I was extremely popular, making millions of dollars every year. I didnโ€™t have a relationship with anyone or seeing anyone I was interested in so guys always crowd over me, invaliding my personal space. Trying to forcefully talk to me, to see if I found them mesmerizing.

I tried to avoid my โ€˜fansโ€™ as much as possible, staying indoorsโ€ฆ not going out unless there is some emergency.

I have always loved dancing, it was myโ€ฆ speciality. Dance and me were like peanut butter and jelly. They were meant to be together.

My mom had been a dancer, so had my grandmother. Guess it runs in the family, yet Iโ€™d always been the best one. I exceeded them in bounds they didnโ€™t think was possible. My footwork was always in rhythm. Iโ€™d never fallen down due to my clumsiness. Mom would remark that I walked like a cat, light and in sync.ย 

Why was I a backup then? My dance teacher has insisted that I be the main lead but I contradicted. Iโ€™d had enough people all over me, didnโ€™t need more bothering me.

My cousin was the lead, she wasnโ€™t as good as me but she was amazing, if I say so myself. Her pirouette was graceful, her foot tucked in as she spun. Her teasels would lift up, she was like a blur to naked eyes. Spinning like a ballerina from the nutcracker.

โ€œHey Vi.โ€

โ€œTucker! What a pleasant surprise,โ€ Tucker was my exโ€™s best friend, heโ€™d been a great friend to me as well. Supporting me during high school when Jared and I broke up.

โ€œI followed Jared, tried to put some sense into him but heโ€™s egoisticโ€ฆ you know.โ€

โ€œOf course, thanks for trying though, all he got was a broken heart,โ€ I said, smiling. Tuckerโ€™s brown eyes reminded me of hot cocoa. He wore a plaid t-shirt. His muscle showed off from the thin shirt. He was stunning, reminded me of my little brother. The chocolate brown eyes glanced back to meet my auburn iris.

He shyly invited me over for coffee at his house. I agreed, overjoyed to spend some time with a friend. I deserved some break.

โ€œSoโ€ฆ what are you looking for?โ€ He blankly asked, his hands searching for mine. I rubbed the cup against my skin, warming it up from the cold sensation. The aroma of coffee flowed into my nose, I took a quiet sip.

โ€œLooking for what?โ€

โ€œInโ€ฆ a guy,โ€ He blushed, I uncomfortably shifted in my seat, was it getting warmer in the room.

โ€œWellโ€ฆ Iโ€™m not reallyโ€ฆ looking yet,โ€ I confronted. He seemed thoughtful, keeping a safe distance so I could be comfortable.

โ€œAny plans?โ€

โ€œNot reallyโ€ฆ I just wrapped up college this year, I want to focus more on my career.โ€

โ€œOhโ€ฆ I see,โ€ He spoke so silently I had to strain my ears closer to make out his words.

We exchanged random conversations, keeping it lighthearted.



โ€œIโ€ฆ I wanted to ask you something,โ€ He locked eyes with me, โ€œNever mind.โ€

I took a deep breath, holding his hand. He froze in shock, but didnโ€™t show any chance of wanting to let go.

โ€œTell me,โ€ I insisted.

โ€œPromise you wonโ€™t be mad?โ€

โ€œYes, Iโ€™m sure it canโ€™t be that bad,โ€ He read my light expression, leading me towards the living room. An enchanting Christmas tree was decorated with every possible color, lights flickered in every direction, the ornaments seemed to have so much history behind them. An Angel adorned the top.

โ€œBeautiful display,โ€ I murmured.

He smirked, โ€œThanks, my momโ€™s big on holidays.โ€

โ€œSoโ€ฆ tell me,โ€ I watched his face flush, he grabbed a box from under the tree, securing it in his hands. Keeping a straight face he faced me again.ย 

โ€œOpen it,โ€ He instructed, handing the box to me.ย 

Speechlessly I opened the box, ripping out the colorful wrapping paper. I watched for glimpses as I uncovered it. Yet, I seemed totally lost when I took out a thin necklace. It was garnished with diamonds and pearls. It was charming.

โ€œThank you.โ€

He smiled. I looked deeper into the box. There seemed to be a piece of paper. Throwing back a quick glance at him I opened the letter.

Dear Vanessa,

Iโ€™ve always thought you were an amazing girl. Your laughing auburn eyes brightened my day, your shiny hazel hair always in perfection. Your laughter is like the tingling of bells.ย 

I have admired you since I laid eyes on your personality. I hope you feel the same way.

Your best friend/admirer


I was trying to search for the right words as Tucker seemed edgy.

โ€œTucker, Iโ€ฆ I didnโ€™t know you felt that way,โ€ I tried to keep calm.

โ€œI know itโ€™s stupid, donโ€™t botherโ€ฆโ€

โ€œIs thatโ€ฆ a ring?โ€ I noted the small silver box on top of the coffee table.ย 


I narrowed my eyes.


I smiled, hugging him. He returned my friendly hug.

โ€œTuckerโ€ฆ Iโ€™m deeply sorry, you know that's not possible for me,โ€ I politely broke down my refusal.

โ€œIโ€™m aware.โ€

โ€œYouโ€™re like my little brother,โ€ I added, trying to ease his pain.


I grabbed my coat, kissing his cheek one last time before setting out.ย 

He waved, I could understand his agony.ย 

It was only the afternoon. I wanted to sleep badly, take a break from reality for a change. Canโ€™t wait for Christmas, just hours away.ย 

โ€œVanessa, I was hoping youโ€™ll be here,โ€ I turned around to see who had disrupted my thoughts.

โ€œOMG, Dave?โ€ย 

โ€œYup, the one and only Dave,โ€ I ran over to give a comforting hug.ย 

โ€œHavenโ€™t seen you in a while.โ€

โ€œYa, been busy.โ€

Dave had been my first dance partner back in college. He was a great break dancer now. His dreamy black eyes still imprinted in my head when we first met. He shook the snow off his coal black hair.

โ€œMind if we take a walk?โ€ He asked, reaching for my hand.ย 


We chattered about life after we separated, he made me laugh so often.ย 

โ€œSo hear your famous now.โ€

โ€œUgh, not you too,โ€ I preferred to not talk about fame when I wasnโ€™t on tour.

โ€œSorryโ€ฆ didnโ€™t know youโ€™re still touchy on that.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s fine.โ€

We reached the park, he seemed to know where to go, leading me to our unknown destination.

โ€œVanessaโ€ฆ I wanted to speak with you about something,โ€ I felt uneasy, my stomach indicated that I felt restless.

Dave came closer, something I wasnโ€™t very comfortable with. I could smell his peppermint scent as he covered my eyes with his hands; blinding me.

โ€œOpen your eyes,โ€ He instructed after leading me through obstacles.ย 

The light flowed back, I grasped at my surroundings. A banner hung from the park gates. My eyes lit with tears reading the words.

Will you marry me Vanessa?

โ€œDaveโ€ฆโ€ I couldnโ€™t describe how I felt.

โ€œSoโ€ฆ yes?โ€ He looked hopeful.

I couldnโ€™t help but feel guilty, Iโ€™d let down two guys already, how hard could one more be? Dave was one of my best friends, I couldnโ€™t imagine living with him. Butโ€ฆ I couldnโ€™t. I didnโ€™t feel that spark between us.

โ€œIโ€ฆ Iโ€™m sorry Dave, I hate to say it butโ€ฆ no,โ€ I whispered. He nodded, as if he knew my answer ahead of time.

โ€œItโ€™s cool, I get it.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m so sorry,โ€ I mouthed back.

He left me alone.ย 

I walked back home, mom must be worried over where I was at. Checking the time on my phone just in case; 6:12. It was such a long day today. What was up with these guys? All proposing to me on the same day.

โ€œVanessa, finally your home!โ€

โ€œMom,โ€ I nodded, taking one of the freshly baked cookies. The heat burned my tongue but the flavor replaced the burn.

โ€œOh and Ken called earlier, said something about having a surprise for you.โ€

โ€œOh goodness,โ€ I whispered unaudibly, I hoped this surprise would have nothing to do withโ€ฆ breaking his heart.

Ken was my childhood friend, his mom and mine are really close. He wasnโ€™t a bad dancer either, sometimes weโ€™d mess around as kids. He was such a sweet guy. Iโ€™d hate to break his heart.

โ€œKenny!โ€ I exclaimed, embracing my old friend. His toasty brown hair was a mess; as usual. I laughed seeing that Ken hadn't changed a bit. His greenish brown eyes were mellow as he returned my hug.

โ€œVi-Vi, glad you came.โ€

I rolled my eyes at the nickname. Ken always called me Vi-Vi since we were toddlers. He couldnโ€™t say my full name so he shortened it; Vi-Vi was a hit.

โ€œShall we?โ€ He took my elbow in his, we laughed. This was like the old times, walking together; hand in hand as weโ€™d spend time together. Ken always helped meโ€ฆ live a real life.

I noticed his eyebrows furrow multiple times. He seemed tense about something, Ken wasnโ€™t much of a worrier; it must be something big.


I stopped, turning my head around.

โ€œI heard you let down Jared.โ€

โ€œYes,โ€ I hissed, not wanting to talk about it.

โ€œAny specific reason why?โ€

โ€œIโ€™m not into him I guess,โ€ I could only think of one logical explanation.

โ€œAnyone else you have in mind?โ€ We continued to walk, yet the awkwardness surrounded us.

โ€œNot really.โ€ย 

He blushed, hiding beneath his loose curly hair.

I heard the faint whisper that set me off again.

โ€œMe?โ€ He locked eyes with me, knowing that Iโ€™d heard him.

My face felt hot as I looked away.

โ€œKen,โ€ I stared into his gorgeous eyes. The same eyes Iโ€™d seen as a child.

โ€œVanessaโ€ฆ wonโ€™t you stay with me?โ€ His eyes were warm, he smiled slightly. His hand gripped on mine as he closed the gap between us.

I felt him brush his lips against mine, not letting go. I couldnโ€™t feel my senses. My breathing stopped altogether. I pushed his face from mine, my cheeks were hot.

โ€œSorry,โ€ He mouthed.

I nodded, embarrassed.

โ€œSo?โ€ He was waiting for my answer.

โ€œKen,โ€ I looked back at him, I knew heโ€™d keep me safe, I wished we were meant to be together. Butโ€ฆ I didnโ€™t feel chemistry. He wasnโ€™t the one for me.

โ€œIโ€™m sorry Kenโ€ฆ I... canโ€™t,โ€ My voice broke as silent tears rolled down my cheeks.

โ€œIโ€ฆ itโ€™s ok, Iโ€™ll always love you,โ€ He cupped my face, bringing his face closer. โ€œGood luck on finding your true love,โ€ With that he left, talking the warmth away. Leaving me alone.

โ€œOh Ken,โ€ I murmured, shaking my head.ย 

Feeling awkward as I reached home, mom had already decorated the tree, she wore a ugly Christmas sweater that lightened my mood rapidly.ย 

โ€œHoneyโ€ฆ how'd go?โ€

โ€œBad,โ€ Apparently my mom was in on this matter.

โ€œOh,โ€ She seemed sorrowful about my decision but she managed a weak smile.

Mom and I settled into the couch, watching the old Christmas movies we watched every year.ย 

Abruptly the doorbell rang during the best part of Home Alone. Groaning, I opened the door.

โ€œOh Mr. Diaz!โ€

โ€œNo formalities needed Vanessa, just call me Justin,โ€ He corrected, smiling.

โ€œJustin it is.โ€

Justin was my dance instructor although he wasnโ€™t much older than me, only two years difference but he was much more graceful. Iโ€™ve known him since college so weโ€™ve known each other for a while.

โ€œMrs. Almโ€ฆ what a wonderful honor to finally meet you,โ€ He bent down, taking to my mothers hand and placing a kiss on her hand. Mom nodded in approval.

โ€œJustin, Iโ€™ve heard so much about you, I hear you're going on a tour tomorrow?โ€

โ€œYes, in fact I was hoping Vanessa would join me,โ€ He gave me a curious look.ย 

โ€œItโ€™s Christmas thoughโ€ฆโ€ Mom trailed off, โ€œWellโ€ฆ tours wait for no one.โ€


โ€œSure,โ€ I grinned sarcastically. I didnโ€™t want to go on tour already, butโ€ฆ it was my job. Oh but the fameโ€ฆ I despised it. People crowding over me. Asking for autographs. Wanting my number. Why this hassle?ย 

โ€œCan we talk?โ€ย 

I nodded, biting my lip again. We went out to the porch. Without waiting for an invitation he sat on the swinging chair, patting the seat beside him.

I sat at the very end, he scooted over. I felt hot all of a sudden, he put his arms around me. Coming closer with every blink of my eyes. My throat felt dry, my lips trembled as he brought his face closer to mine. I closed my eyes, trying to push away but I couldnโ€™t find the strength.

Were we meant for each other? Justin and me?

He was just inches away from me, he held my face. Locking it in place as we glanced at each other in silence.

โ€œJustinโ€ฆ stop,โ€ I hesitated to upset him, heโ€™d helped me so much in achieving my dreams of becoming a dancer. Butโ€ฆ this was my life.

Justinโ€™s face turned red as he quickly released me.


We didnโ€™t face each other, we were too embarrassed to talk.

โ€œVanessa,โ€ He called for my attention again.

โ€œWhat?โ€ I snapped, he seemed surprised over my outburst.

โ€œIโ€™m sorryโ€ฆ I donโ€™t know what came over me.โ€

โ€œHey, donโ€™t blame yourself,โ€ He chided, smiling slightly.

โ€œWhatever,โ€ I mumbled. Still felt an awkward vibe between us.

โ€œWill you marry me?โ€ He blurted out, his ears going red.

โ€œWhat?โ€ I stood up.

โ€œPlease?โ€ He added.

โ€œIโ€ฆ Iโ€™m not ready.โ€

โ€œOh, will you be ready soon?โ€

โ€œJustinโ€ฆ I canโ€™t, we canโ€™t be together.โ€

He nodded, standing up and handing me a card.

โ€œI understand, meet me in the airport tomorrow,โ€ He smiled bitterly and turned away. Jumping into his car and dashing off.

I felt heated up as I threw myself into the bed. Closing my damp eyes. Today had been such a coincidence. Five guys that meant so much to me had proposed to me butโ€ฆ none of them won my heart.

โ€œIโ€™ll find himโ€ฆ soon,โ€ I mumbled as I dozed off. Tomorrow was a fresh day, I hoped it would be a fresh start in life for me.

Christmas miracles can happen...

December 23, 2020 18:04

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Akshaya โœจ
04:49 Dec 25, 2020

Hi Varsha! I really enjoyed reading your story! I always love your dialogue and fast pacing. I can see how you incorporated the backup dancer on her tour prompt into this! Does that mean you're going to be putting out a story based on that prompt, too? I can't wait for part two of this! Keep writing! :)


Akshaya โœจ
05:08 Dec 27, 2020

Of course! I'll read it now!


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Lilliane Wei
00:35 Jan 05, 2021

Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!! I'm finally here. I am so, so sorry. Something came up. Anyway, this was a great story, Varsha! Lots of raw emotion. I thought you wrote it all very nicely and connected it all through her profession. Very nice job! I look forward to reading more of your stories!


aww, thats ok Lillian, I toatally understand:) Thank you so much:) I'll def let u know when a new stories up!


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17:47 Dec 25, 2020

Another great story from you! It was a really good read, Varsha!


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Kate Reynolds
22:31 Dec 23, 2020

Hello Varsha! I really liked this story, especially the ending! Tell me when part 2 comes out! :D Great job!!


Kate Reynolds
03:02 Dec 24, 2020



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Maya W.
18:42 Dec 23, 2020

Hello Varsha1 I'm sorry I haven't gotten around to reading your stories until now - I've been really busy and quite honestly just haven't been super good about remembering things lately (just look at all my missing assignments). but I'm glad I did eventually come, because I quite enjoyed this! You used the backup dancer thingie from the other prompt, but this was still very clearly meant for this prompt. The dialogue was well done, and the main character seemed to have good motivations for her actions. As for the others, well...they fell a l...


Hi Maya! Thats fine, I get that:) Yes, I did need more details on the other characters but I felt like it would go over 3000 words so I let that be. And I'll love for you to check out my other story I posted yesturday "True meaning of Christmas" and for sure I will check out your story:)


Maya W.
19:05 Dec 23, 2020

I'll go read it right now!


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Maya W.
19:16 Dec 23, 2020

Okay, I just left a comment there!


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Coco Longstaff
02:55 Jan 16, 2021

This was so cool and really entertaining to read, although I mean wow, who would throw away a ring just like that? Hehe. Also, would u mind doing my quiz on my bio? Thx!


Coco Longstaff
05:28 Jan 16, 2021

Oh huh weird ok just a sec


Coco Longstaff
05:32 Jan 16, 2021


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Jane Andrews
08:39 Jan 01, 2021

Hi Varsha. I had fun reading your response to the prompt 'Write about someone who gets proposed to five times on Christmas Eve.' Poor Vanessa - five proposals and not one of them was from someone she liked enough to accept! You tried to make a strong distinction between Vanessa's would-be suitors by referencing hair colour and eye colour, and you also gave a bit of backstory for each one too (ex-boyfriend, best friend, childhood friend, fellow dancer, dance teacher); however, the proposal from Mr Diaz/Justin seemed to come out of nowhere,...


Hi Jane! Thank you so much for reading, yes that sounded way better. Thank you for giving me great ideas like this to improve my writing!


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