The Voices Inside My Head...

Written in response to: Set your story in a labyrinth that holds a secret.... view prompt

221 comments

Fantasy Teens & Young Adult

The voices in my head are telling me something…


I am in a labyrinth.


All the cries in my head were telling me something extremely different. My head didn’t have the mechanisms to reflect or linger, it just jumped to a resolution because it saw the world at face value and searched no deeper than it should. The fog in my head augmented as my head made transitions by spinning around incessantly. I was in a labyrinth…


How did I get here?


Had I been here before?


Of course, I got no convincing answer.


I surveyed my neighbours; it was just like my normal life with cars and houses; my environment did not vary from anything else I had seen before; like my normal life. My eyes kept cruising to catch something. Suddenly I realized a light at the end of this channel; it was a trail heading up to something colossal.


Was this a figment of my imagination?


My Meemaw told me that actions and words are divergent; no not like the book. Words make up the world that we wish to live in, they create Utopia and actions generate the Utopia to come alive and my brain didn’t have the thinking capacity to establish its own Utopia nor the techniques to do so; so, it just went with the flow and questioned nothing; until now. 


I have been in many worlds before jungle, moon, rainforest, and considerably more than I can even remember. I feel like my intellect is playing tricks on me and I cannot stop this utter absurdity.


The walls of this labyrinth make me feel confined making me claustrophobic, even little noises echoed in the ambiance, that making up of my shivering and breathing and the built-up of condensation in my glasses causes my vision to be warped and the wisp of white on my glasses makes me lose my sense of direction; but I can still see the light at the end of this tunnel as it will be my guide through this labyrinth. 


In the reflection of a window, I looked at myself distorted, panicked, and I ran my palm over the brick wall to touch something absolute. This wasn’t a phantom. This was reality. I thought that the sun should set already; I had stayed here for so long pondering and waiting; however, the neighbouring light seemed so luminant as the noon beat down upon my head.


I noticed that there was something peculiar about this tunnel as I walked towards it, as it looked familiar and overly memorable. Each crack and crevice of the homes looked well known. It was like wandering along the same trail; the familiarity startled me, but I just carried on walking forward.


I lumbered to the centre of an insignificant town; it was derelict, like my brain. I heard the taunting voices telling me I wasn’t suitable for society; meaning I didn’t have a normal brain persuading me to go to therapy, and I genuinely tried not to take any of that to heart, but it didn’t work. The word sin rang in my ear; that is what I was: a curse. I know for a fact that it is hard for me to be alive. Nothing was real to me anymore. My world was becoming a virtual reality, and I hoped that all the medical operations make me normal again.

Normal is an unachievable fantasy.


Every step I took in this tunnel brought me closer to my destiny. It drew me closer to the light in the distance, getting closer by the second, and it made me want to run towards it. Every step I drew, the light ebbed away, its luminescence burned out, causing it to dwindle and fade. How had I stumbled into this labyrinth? 


My feet chilled before the air and ground became so cold, the sky emptied itself as the last raindrop and cloud passed away; there was nothing to look up to. It was all gone. My mind was disorientated. Nothing was going right; nothing was guiding me anymore because of the light withering in the distance. Even it didn’t appreciate me. The voices in my head were howling; it was sheer turmoil. None of this was intriguing, and I had never felt this overwhelmed by my senses. This was becoming unbearable. So, I ran through the labyrinth; my distorted vision caused me to slip over my very own feet but my voices continued to shout at each other. It was all so messed up.


I didn’t know how to differentiate between virtual and reality? 

Was I hallucinating?


Everything seemed to beckon me to come towards it; it was signalling my name and luring me towards my fate. I didn’t want any of this. I didn’t want my life, my friends, my intellect. Nothing. The mere request I had from God was to make my suffering go away; I demanded to be alone; as I preferred it that way, but evidently it doesn’t matter what I prefer, but what society prefers. My doctors wanted me to have a social life and adequate friends to cope with my condition, but I don’t and that doesn’t matter.


I recognized a familiar building, and I realized; this was my destination, making it my entire world. My inner navigation was wrong. I didn’t want to be here or anywhere near it, but it was the end of the labyrinth. It was a complete circle.


What was the point of my journey?


Summoning me in front, the hospital stood proudly; with its doors wide open and the nurses staring intently at me to come inside quickly before I collapse again. Though the hospital has been my home for the last month, it has always felt alien to me. Every inch of the building was a habitation of torture; they did experiments and operations on my brain to discover its capacity and willpower. I was a guinea pig being tested on; reluctantly. As expected, I had no say in this because ostensibly it was good for me.


Yes, it was good that schizophrenia had taken over my existence.

Everything in this world was a secret; because I understood none of it and the labyrinth has taken me to my ultimate resting place.


The labyrinth was all an uncontrollable hallucination.







December 11, 2021 16:12

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221 comments

Cookie Carla🍪
15:01 Dec 13, 2021

I like how your story is so visual and I can see the story instead of just reading it. You did an amazing job with creating the right balance of imagery. You took me on a ride and it was like I was actually living the life of a person with schizophrenia. Amazing read!!

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Palak Shah
16:53 Dec 13, 2021

Thank you so much, Carla for this amazing feedback :))

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Cookie Carla🍪
17:44 Dec 13, 2021

No problem😁

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Yuk Yuk
21:04 Jan 13, 2022

You took the words out of my mouth.

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Cookie Carla🍪
15:22 Jan 18, 2022

<33

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Moon Lion
18:32 Dec 11, 2021

Interesting how the character slowly came to see the madness. I like how we ended still not knowing a lot about the labyrinth they are in. A nice, short read! Also, side note, what/who is a Meemaw?

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Palak Shah
21:13 Dec 11, 2021

Yeah, I wanted to make that suspense. A Meemaw is a grandmother figure. I have been watching a series on Netflix called Young Sheldon and she is referred a lot so I thought I would make the same reference lol :)) Thank you so much for your feedback :))

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Dhwani Jain
07:06 Dec 12, 2021

YOUNG SHELDON IS ON NETFLIX???

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Palak Shah
13:56 Dec 12, 2021

Yes it is :))

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Dhwani Jain
03:00 Dec 13, 2021

For me, Young Sheldon is on Amazon Prime. The Big Bang theory is on both Prime and Netflix.

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Palak Shah
17:03 Dec 13, 2021

I don't have prime lol :))

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Huh....That's weird. (Scarlet Thread 3 is about to be posted)

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Yeah, Dhwani, it is lol. I'm watching it rn with my parents :)

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Palak Shah
17:04 Dec 13, 2021

Yes it is a very good series and I am completely hooked :))

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Dhwani Jain
04:56 Dec 14, 2021

I know

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Dhwani Jain
03:01 Dec 13, 2021

CHeck mah message for Palak

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Yuk Yuk
21:02 Jan 13, 2022

I just thought it was coincidence. Love Young Sheldon

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Palak Shah
22:03 Jan 13, 2022

Same, it is a great series :)) Have you watched the big band theory?

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Yuk Yuk
07:16 Jan 14, 2022

I haven't watched an episode but I've watched a couple clips to understand the plot of the series and it's connection to young Sheldon

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Palak Shah
17:23 Jan 14, 2022

Nice, they are great series :))

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Ivy Spade
13:18 Dec 13, 2021

Great story! I'm glad I read it!

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Palak Shah
16:55 Dec 13, 2021

Thank you Ivy :))

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Ivy Spade
19:24 Dec 13, 2021

Of course!

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Suma Jayachandar
01:44 Dec 13, 2021

I liked your concept and it's treatment. Well executed! I wondered if you meant ' light at the end of the tunnel' in the beginning? Good story!

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Palak Shah
21:21 Dec 13, 2021

I did mean that. Thanks for the spot. Thank you for reading my story :))

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Cool story, Palak! I liked the kinda feel of madness, a darker version of Alice and Wonderland of sorts. I know someone who needs to read this....

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Palak Shah
21:22 Dec 13, 2021

Thank you Peachie for this amazing feedback :))

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Kevin Broccoli
17:27 Dec 12, 2021

I liked the free-flowing nature of this piece and how you wrapped us up in its detail. Good work.

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Palak Shah
21:26 Dec 13, 2021

Thank you Kevin :))

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Payal Shah
16:25 Dec 12, 2021

Amazing story Palak. I love the description and the plot line is brilliant. Keep up the good work

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Palak Shah
16:57 Dec 12, 2021

Thank you for this wonderful feedback :))

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Francis Daisy
02:39 Mar 07, 2022

🍿Hey there! Feel like coming over to upvote me some? Give me some valuable feedback on my last two stories? I'd love to hear what you have to say! And, you need to find time to post a story...soon! I miss your voice!

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Palak Shah
17:07 Mar 07, 2022

Heyyyy Francis :)) How are you doing? Yes I am coming :))

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Francis Daisy
02:02 Feb 15, 2022

No new stories since December? Where are you? Are you okay?

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Palak Shah
14:00 Feb 17, 2022

Yeah, I am good. I am just quite busy with school and everything. As soon as I find time I will write a story. Anyway, how are you doing?

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Francis Daisy
01:42 Feb 18, 2022

Glad to know you are good. Busy here as well. I've been trying to write here and there. Check out the latest story, if you find the time? Thanks! I always value your input. :)

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Palak Shah
10:48 Feb 18, 2022

That's nice :)) I will do, I love reading your stories :))

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Francis Daisy
11:39 Feb 18, 2022

Thank you!

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Palak Shah
15:27 Feb 18, 2022

Anything interesting going on?

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OMG very beautifully written Palak! The descriptions are wild :DD One thing I'd say is to use less commas, and other than that it was a great imagery and good work once again!

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Palak Shah
16:57 Feb 02, 2022

Thank you for this amazing feedback, I really appreciate it :))

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15:32 Jan 29, 2022

Люблю такие истории, сама пишу нечто про психологию, внутренний мир человека 👍

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Palak Shah
17:00 Jan 29, 2022

Thank you for this wonderful feedback, I really appreciate it Спасибо за такой замечательный отзыв, мне очень приятно

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🍫 Concerning your TBR list: I've read Fahrenheit 451, it's a good one, do read it! AND The Lord of the Rings: Many people have the same deal as you, they start reading and then stop, but want to try again. I read LOTR, and no kidding, it's my absolute favorite book after the Bible. Something I do when I'm trying to read a book I'm not enjoying is: Read one page, or even one paragraph, a day. Then, if I'm in the mood to keep going, read another paragraph/page. If I'm not, wait until next session to read a bit more. Piano is fun and g...

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Palak Shah
21:21 Jan 26, 2022

Yes, I really want to read both of those books. I am kinda on a reading slump right now because I haven't read a book in ages however I have written loads of stories so what would you advise me? I have learned how to solve it and my best time is 1 minute lol I really need to update my profile :)) I will definitely come :))

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If you're still on a roll with your writing, I think you should keep going as long as the stories keep coming. If you're not feeling inspired to write, or just want to take a break from it, then go read a book. After I read for a while, I get tons of ideas, and then I'm all set to write again. My little rule: Read, Write, Repeat! When you read The Lord of the Rings, DO NOT skip the prologues (I think there are 4 of them?), the information they contain is very important. However, if there is a foreword not written by J. R. R. Tolkien himsel...

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Palak Shah
14:36 Jan 30, 2022

I understand now, thanks for this suggestion. Sometimes I can't be bothered to write but I just have to get myself into the flow and it all just works out for me. Ahhhhh nice, well I never actually skip the prologue because sometimes I find that to be the best bit of the story lol :))

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That's great that you don't skip prologues! I never do, but my siblings and Mom do sometimes.

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Palak Shah
16:57 Feb 02, 2022

Nah I like them a lot :))

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Ravali Kertha
00:49 Jan 20, 2022

🍫

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Palak Shah
16:38 Jan 20, 2022

Thank you for reading till the end. I appreciate it :))

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Nora Ouardi
18:18 Jan 09, 2022

Havent talked to you in a while... but this story was great! I loved how the main character was oblivious to whats going on and it's really interesting. Just a little plug lol, but I just wrote my first story in a long as hell time so it would mean a lot if you would check it out!!

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Palak Shah
16:52 Jan 10, 2022

Thanks for reading my story. I will do :)) How are you doing?

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Nora Ouardi
19:23 Jan 15, 2022

im goodddd hbu?

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Palak Shah
14:00 Jan 16, 2022

I am great. Thanks :))

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Francis Daisy
22:19 Jan 03, 2022

🍿 Why is the popcorn always so hard for me to find? Where are you? Come check out my story?

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Palak Shah
12:54 Jan 04, 2022

Heyy Francis :)) I just typed in popcorn and I found it lol :)) How are you doing? I am coming over right now :))

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Lisa Roberts
01:34 Dec 17, 2021

Very interesting, I know this is fantasy but your sentence, I looked in the mirror then touched the brick wall. Is the mirror in the brick wall? Did you walk from the mirror to the brick wall? I got confused.

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Palak Shah
17:20 Dec 17, 2021

The windows were her mirror and she just looked at them :))

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Philip Ebuluofor
20:09 Dec 16, 2021

Fine work palak. Keep it up.

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Palak Shah
17:18 Dec 17, 2021

Thank you Philip :))

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Dee Dee Seaburg
19:56 Dec 16, 2021

Very good story, intriguing and descriptive.

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Palak Shah
17:18 Dec 17, 2021

Thank you so much :))

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Karen Kinley
23:28 Dec 15, 2021

I loved the imagery and description as we got an-depth glimpse of the MC's psyche. You weave that all very nicely! I wish there was a bit more action or dialogue to move the story along. It felt like it was entirely in his mind. Just my opinion! Great read!

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Palak Shah
16:52 Dec 16, 2021

Thank you so much, Karen, I really appreciate this feedback :))

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Elliana Ramirez
12:44 Dec 15, 2021

thanks for liking my story! :) this was very interesting~how the character slowly came to see the madness.

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Palak Shah
15:35 Dec 15, 2021

Thanks Elliana :))

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Elliana Ramirez
14:40 Dec 21, 2021

of-course, only returning the favor :)

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Palak Shah
21:35 Dec 21, 2021

:))

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