Amphitrite's Pearl

“You’re mad, Capt’n. Bloody stark, ravin’ mad, I tell ye!”

The stout, older pirate’s words fell on deaf ears as the younger captain threw off his heavy coat in roguish anticipation. The salty sea breeze ruffled his messy, dirty blonde hair as he exited his cabin and made his way to the upper deck.

“And you worry too much, Mr. Gadd,” he replied, grinning ear to ear like a cat that caught the canary as he began to unbutton his shirt. “I happen to think that I’m quite the bloody genius, actually.”

“Genius?!” Mr. Gadd said, his near-toothless mouth agape in exasperation. “You sailed us directly into a bleedin’ hurricane and nearly got us all killed!”

“But you’re all still alive, aren’t ya?”

“Mr. Swiggs ain’t!”

“Well, nobody liked Mr. Swiggs, anyhow.”

“And most of our food supplies are at the bottom of the sea!”

“Relax, we still have more than enough food to last us once we set sail for Nassau after I’m finished here. Trust me, I’ve got this situation well under control.” Mr. Gadd and everyone else on the ship within hearing distance all stifled a laugh, some better than others. This did little to sour the captain’s cheery disposition, though.

“So just why in ’ell did the Capt’n ’ave us sail right into that ungodly storm and bring us here to the middle of nowhere fer?” one of the crew-mates bellowed, prompting a round of affirming grunts and angry growls. The captain spun around and beamed brightly down at them from his place on the deck.

“I’m so very glad you asked, mate!” he replied enthusiastically. “You see, this here spot in the middle of nowhere is where I was told by my lady-love that Amphitrite’s Pearl can be found!” This time the laughter could not be held back and a great, mocking roar echoed all over and inside the ship and reverberated above the waters around them.

“Stark ravin’ mad! Stark ravin’ mad!” a green-blue parrot roosting on Mr. Gadds’ shoulder squawked, happily bobbing its head up and down.

“Yer lady-love told ye that, eh?” another pirate asked smugly. “Ye got that from one of Madame Rose’s girls at Nassau?” This got another round of chortles from the crew, but the captain’s grin only got wider.

“Even better!” he said. “I got it from the great Lady Amphitrite herself!” The whole ship went dead silent. “I’m serious, lads! Long story short, we met on a beach, had a wonderful night, and she said that I have the potential to become her favorite lover, but I must first prove myself by finding her pearl in her husband’s secret treasure stash and returning it to her. She marked the coordinates on me map, and so here we are!”

Again, nobody made a single noise until Mr. Gadd muttered softly, “Bloody ’ell. He has gone mad.”

“So he’s brought us all the way out here to die just so that he impress some harlot he met with a shiny rock?” another voice rang up, quickly met with more angry rabble from the crew.

“Stark ravin’ mad!” cawed Mr. Gadd’s parrot. “Stark ravin’ mad! Bloody ’ell! Ravin’ mad!”

“First of all, language,” the captain piped up. “Secondly, I ain’t no raven, you squawkin’ feather duster! And most importantly, of course I wouldn’t bring you all this way just so that my lady gets a ‘shiny rock’; all you lads are going home with shiny rocks for your own ladies, and so much more! What part of “treasure trove” did you landlubbers miss? I’m talking gold, doubloons, jewels, pearls, you name it! It will all be yours once I have successfully recovered my lady’s prized possession.” The crew’s angry buzz was somewhat replaced with murmurs of piqued interest, but not all of them were entirely convinced.

“And just what if there ain’t nothin’ down there?” one of them asked.

“Oh, there’s something down there, alright,” the captain replied, his confidence never swaying. “Captain Damian Hawk has never been wrong about this sort of thing! Those of you who have sailed with me the longest can attest to that!” Before anyone could utter a single word, he threw off his shirt and quickly made his way to the port side of the ship. “Are we firmly anchored, Mr. Gadd?” he asked his first mate.

“Aye, Captain, but…”

“And is the diving bell ready for deployment?”

“Aye, it is Captain, but…”

“Then off I go!” But before he took another step, Mr. Gadd grabbed Captain Hawk’s arm and said, “Surely ye don’t mean to swim to the bottom of the sea all by yerself, do ye?”

“Of course not!” Hawk replied indignantly. “What do you think I am? Stupid? I’m takin’ my sword with me, obviously!” He slapped the cutlass strapped to his hip as he said this. “I mean, Lord knows what kind of slimy beasties might be guarding all that treasure! Well, I’m off lads! See ya in an hour!” And with that he swan dived straight into the ocean below like an arrow and then, with a splash, he was gone without a trace.

The crew stared, dumbfounded, at the water below for a solid minute, trying to properly process what had just happened.

“Time ta get a new capt’n, ye suppose?” one of them asked.

“I say we take the ship, make haste back to Nassau and let Davy Jones’ Locker have his crazy ass!” A chorus of “Ayes” and “Hear, hears” began to ring out before Mr. Gadd tried to get everyone’s attention.

“We ain’t goin’ nowheres until the capt’n gets back with ’is treasure!” he bellowed over the roar of the other pirates’ collective groans and jeers.

“Ye don’ mean ye actually believe his crackpot story, do ye?!” they asked him.

“I know it does sound quite mad,” he replied back, “But I’ve sailed with that mad lad for years, and, as reckless and brainless as he can be when he dives into things, he’s always made good on his word! Under his command we’ve always had gold to spare, rum to last us night after night, and he ain’t never let us down even in the tightest spots. If he says there’s treasure down there, then there’s treasure down there, so I say we give him that hour as he said and wait! If he ain’t back by then, then we set sail for Nassau and go from there. What say ye, gentlemen?” There was a more enthusiastic roar of approval, as cautiously optimistic as it was, before the pirates went back to their duties. Mr. Gadds looked over the side to where he last saw Captain Hawk disappear and muttered to himself, “That bloody lunatic better be back with his treasure, or so help me God, there will be a bloody mutiny, and I don’t think I can get ’im out of another one.”

“Stark ravin’ mad!” his parrot squawked again. “Stark ravin’ mad! Bloody ’ell…”

Captain Hawk pumped his legs and arms harder and harder as he swam deeper and deeper into the brine. Even with the bright noonday sun above him, it was getting harder to see this deep into the ocean.

Almost there, Captain Hawk. Just a little further.

In a few moments, he could see the shapes of numerous, rotted shipwrecks dotted all over the sandy floor beneath him, eerie testaments of the poor souls who tried to brave these waters from ages past. He swam past and through them, having a general idea of where his treasure might be.

Presently, he saw a flash, a glint of something partially buried under what appeared to be a huge rock. Upon closer inspection, he saw that it was part of a pearl necklace. Not the kind of pearl he was looking for, but now he was more sure than ever that he was on the right track. Emboldened and on a hunch, he slipped his fingers underneath the rock and began to try and lift it up. The muscles in his arms burned, his legs began to sink into the sand, and his lungs felt like they were lit on fire as he tried to heave the giant slab; he always prided himself on being able to hold his breath far longer than anyone else, but he knew that he couldn’t keep it up forever. Finally, the rock began to budge, then slowly rise up off the sand. Captain Hawk pushed even harder and finally flipped the stone on its side, exposing a man-sized hole underneath.

Jackpot! Let’s see where this leads…

Captain Hawk swam down the hole and found himself in a large cave filled with… just about every kind of treasure he could imagine, and some that he could never imagine. The sight nearly took his breath away (what was left of it, at least): more gold than he knew could exist, diamonds, rubies, emeralds, chalices of all shapes and sizes… it was all so very dazzling to him, so much so that he almost forgot why he was there to begin with. Almost.

Focus, mate, focus. Remember what you came for…

He swam further down, trying his best to ignore all the shiny goodies literally surrounding him on all sides. Finally, he found the bottom, and – lo and behold – there it was: resting on a pedestal in the center of the lower floor was what appeared to be a large, bright blue orb that seemed to have an ethereal glow to it. There was no doubt about it – this had to be Amphitrite’s Pearl, at long last.

Entranced, Captain Hawk gingerly picked it up and stared at it wide-eyed. Such a fine, beautiful gem for such a fine, beautiful lady, indeed, he thought gleefully to himself as he pocketed the orb and started to make his way back up, filling up with as many gold coins as his pockets could hold. Wait until the boys get a load of this. Why, any small portion of this treasure would make them all kings. Imagine if –

His thoughts were abruptly halted as something large and slimy quickly wrapped itself around his leg and yanked him upward. Startled, he drew his cutlass and tried to hack away at what looked like a large tentacle. But before he could do so another one shot at him and knocked his sword out of his hand. Immediately he was pulled out of the cave and brought face to face with a ginormous octopus – a much larger than he had ever seen before – and a really tall man floating next to it. This man had a massive build, a thick beard that looked similar to seaweed, and was brandishing a golden trident. Captain Hawk quickly began to piece together who this man might be: Neptune, ancient god of the seas, and his pet kraken accompanying him.

“So, you’re Amphitrite’s new lover, are you?” the man said menacingly. “I see. My wife certainly has… interesting taste. Now, hand over the Pearl to me, pirate, and I promise your death will be… moderately painless. Otherwise… well, krakens take quite a while to properly digest their food, so I’ve heard.” He gave a small, cruel laugh as Captain Hawk struggled in vain to escape the kraken’s grip.

Better think fast, he thought to himself, Or it’s Davy Jones’ locker for you!