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Fiction Suspense Thriller

"It was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives," Ms. Christina read. "But instead, it was the worst."

The bell rang.

"Class is dismissed! Have a wonderful weekend everyone! I want you to finish this book by Tuesday!" she said in her fake, sweet voice.

The class packed up their books and began to leave. Before the last student left, she called her name.

"Nicole, stay here for a minute, will you?"

Nicole nodded and shoved the last book in her backpack. She then looked at Ms. Christina.

Ms. Christina had always been Nicole's least favorite teacher. She didn't know why, but she always seemed... creepy. There was something about her, something eerie. She gave off bad vibes.

"It's come to my attention that your grades have been slipping lately," said Ms. Christina.

Nicole looked at the ground, wanting to get this over with so she could go home.

"You'll have to bring them up to pass my class. If not, you'll be stuck in seventh-grade math again next year. Your best chance is to get a good grade on the final exam. If you do that, you might have a passing grade."

Nicole nodded again. She avoided eye contact with Ms. Christina, as usual.

"The exam is in a week, you'll have to study a lot to pass it."

Once again, Nicole nodded.

They stood in silence for a minute or two. When neither of them said anything for a while, Nicole took that as her cue to leave. She put the book bag on her shoulders and tried to walk out.

Ms. Christina grabbed her shoulders.

"Study hard," she whispered.

Nicole pulled away and rushed out the door. Why was this teacher so creepy? Nicole wasn't looking forward to studying, but she knew she had to pass. If not, her parents would kill her. She took her cell phone and called her friend.

It rang once, then twice, then a third time. On the third ring, the call was answered.

"Hey Nicole, what's up?"

"Nothin' much," said Nicole. "You wanna come over to my place?"

"Sure, I'll be there by three-thirty," Sasha said.

Nicole hung up. Sarah had been her best friend since second grade and honestly, she forgot how they met. She hoped Sasha would help her not be too bored while studying. Nicole exited the building and walked down the street.

Her house wasn't too far away from the school and she could probably make it there in five minutes.

She walked until she made it there. When she did, she took her key out of her pocket and let herself in.

Nobody was home yet. Her older brother didn't get out of school until four o'clock and both of her parents were still at work. She went upstairs to her room and unpacked, setting her textbooks on her bed. She sat there until Sasha got there. When she did, she heard a knock on the door.

Knowing it was Sasha, she answered it.

"Hey," Sasha said.

"Hey," said Nicole. "I hate to bore you, but do you mind helping me study?"

"Sure, no problem."

Nicole let Sasha in and they went up to her room to study. They studied for about two hours. Nicole was happy she invited Sasha because she made studying a lot more fun. At around six, Sasha said she needed to go home.

"Come on Sasha, can't you just stay for another ten minutes?" asked Nicole.

"Nicole, I really gotta go, my mom will be worried."

"Just text her or something, it's only ten minutes."

"Fine," said Sasha.

She pulled out her phone and texted her mom.

"Is it just me, or is Ms. Christina a bit creepy?" Nicole asked.

"She seems fine to me," said Sasha.

"She said my last chance of passing is to ace the last exam," Nicole said.

"I'm sure you'll do fine."

They talked for a little while longer, until it was time for Sasha to leave. Nicole said goodbye to her friend and walked her out.

For the rest of the day, Nicole continued to study and watched a little bit of TV.

She studied, watched TV, and hung out with Sasha for the rest of the weekend. On Monday, she woke up early and went to school. She pretty much had a normal school day, that is, until it was time for Ms. Christina's class.

"I've decided that we're going to have the exam a day early," she said.

The entire class cried out.

"You can't do that!" some cried.

"That's not fair!" others said.

"Hush, hush, hush. Quiet down, class. I've realized that some of you don't study until the last minute so, with the principal's permission, I decided to try to teach you guys a lesson," she said.

When the class stopped complaining, she handed out the papers. Everyone got one except for Nicole.

"What about me?" she asked.

"You Nicole, will be testing in another room," said Ms. Christina.

Nicole didn't question it very much and followed her teacher to another room. When she entered, she saw Sasha.

"Sasha, why are you here? What happened to you?" she said with concern in her voice.

Sasha had cuts and bruises all over her body. Her eyes were swollen and she looked horrible. Ms. Christina shut and locked the door.

"You two are coming with me," she said.

"What are you doing Ms. Christina?" Nicole asked.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" she asked.

She took a knife out of her pocket.

"Now come one, let's go," she said, gesturing to the window.

She pointed the knife at them as they climbed out the window.

Nicole was terrified. Ms. Christina always seemed creepy to her, but she never expected her to kidnap them. She was worried about Sasha. Was she going to be okay? Why did Ms. Christina harm her? What was she doing? Would they survive this? She tried to push those thoughts away. She needed to focus, to think of a plan to get them away.

They could try to make a run for it, but someone might get hurt. When everyone was out the window, Ms. Christina continued to point the knife at them.

Outside was a bunch of people and Nicole was very happy to see them. She tried to cry out for help. Ms. Christina clamped her hand over her mouth to silence her.

"Head to my car, it's the silver Cadillac. And don't say a word or I'll hurt your friend," she said in a sinister voice.

This was the scariest thing that had ever happened to Nicole in her life. Should she leave her friend and go to the car? Sasha might come right after her, but what if she didn't? What if she was hurt again? Nicole couldn't leave her behind.

She spun around and shoved Ms. Christina to the ground, pushing the knife out the way. Stunned, Ms. Christina laid on the ground.

"Come on Sasha, we gotta go!" Nicole shouted.

She helped Sasha up and they scrambled away.

Ms. Christina's shock wore away and she reached for the knife. She picked it up and ran after the two girls.

"Help, help!" the girls cried.

Ms. Christina was almost to them.

The people around them were looking at them, wondering what was going on. A lot of them were panicked, running in every direction and screaming.

Ms. Christina grabbed Sasha and pulled her by the collar. She yanked her back to the ground.

Nicole lost Sasha in the crowd. There were too many people over there. She was bumping into everyone trying to find her best friend.

Ms. Christina stabbed Sasha right in the stomach. She then ran off, blending in with the crowd.

Nicole looked and looked but she could not find Sasha. When she did, she was horrified. She picked her up and ran for the school, needing to get help for her as soon as possible. Sasha was bleeding at a rapid rate, if she didn't get medical attention soon, she wouldn't survive.

Nicole pushed her way through the crowd. She was almost to the school. When she made it, she shoved the door open.

By then it was too late. Sasha's heartbeat was gone.

November 17, 2020 12:39

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57 comments

NOOO! I was not expecting this to happen!!!! It was a little fast but I still really loved your writing! From the last piece to this one, I can see a huge improvement and I really love it. You used more descriptive and sophisticated language like "sinister" and you did use a little more description of the character's emotion and what was going on! Keep up the good work and wonderful effort! Happy Writing and Lot's of Goodness! :) ~SS

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Julia Boddie
00:10 Dec 22, 2020

Thanks a lot!

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Akshaya Sutrave
06:44 Nov 18, 2020

Hello Julia! Your story was really imaginative. I did not expect Ms Christina to be a kidnapper, although she seemed very unpleasant in the beginning. This unexpected turn actually made the story even more gripping! By the way, congratulations on publishing your novel :)! I will definitely read it!

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Julia Boddie
20:15 Nov 18, 2020

Thanks a lot!

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Akshaya Sutrave
02:26 Nov 19, 2020

:)

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Julia Boddie
12:42 Nov 17, 2020

If anyone reads this and has time (and wants to) could you please give me some feedback? Also, I am proud to say that I got my very first book published. I would be very grateful if any of you bought a copy and/or followed me on Facebook at: Fantasy Dreams with Author Julia Boddie. I hate pressuring people and understand if you don't want to buy one. However, if you do, here is the link and you can just copy and paste it into your Google Search bar. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08N3X672H Thanks!

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CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Julia Boddie
00:03 Dec 22, 2020

Thank you!

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Julia Boddie
00:10 Dec 22, 2020

Thank you!

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Julia Boddie
00:10 Dec 22, 2020

Thank you!

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Felicity Anne
14:34 Nov 17, 2020

I know we have not talked much, but I happened to wander through here and saw this comment! I just wanted to say congratulations on publishing your first novel!!! That is so amazing! I would be happy to check out your book! The plot looks extremely intriguing! Again, congratulations!! :)

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Julia Boddie
14:37 Nov 17, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Felicity Anne
14:55 Nov 17, 2020

No problem! ;)

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Hello Julia!

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Bro, you've published two whole books!!! EEEEEK!!! I would like to read them but not now, my parents are trying not to spend much now. SO for now, I'm not really allowed to buy books and stuff. But I hope to read your book soon!!!!

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Keya M.
15:35 Mar 16, 2021

Hey Julia! Gosh, it's been a while! I was wondering if you could leave some feedback on one of my stories. I'd really appreciate it. Hope you're doing well!

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Julia Boddie
18:17 Mar 16, 2021

Of course! Hope you're having a great day!

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Keya M.
19:03 Mar 16, 2021

Thanks so much Julia!

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Keya M.
17:19 Dec 09, 2020

Wow! This story was so good! I loved the way you described the teacher and their escape. Also, congrats on your novel's publishing! I can't wait to read it!

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Julia Boddie
21:42 Dec 09, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Meera Lakshmi
14:15 Dec 03, 2020

Hi! I really liked this! Can you read and maybe leave some feedback on one of my stories?

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Julia Boddie
23:50 Dec 03, 2020

Thank you and I will definitely give you feedback!

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I loved this story! (I am probably your biggest fan, I've even read your novel!!!) Anyways, I have a question, It's not about your story though. I want to publish a book I wrote. How do I do it? (Preferably free) Did you have an agent, If so, Do you mind giving me their name? Again, I loved your story, I'm kind of sad that Sasha died though. Thank you!

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Julia Boddie
20:07 Dec 07, 2020

I will gladly help you publish your book. I did not have an agent and I got it published it's a really easy process and it's free. To do it, you can paste this link in your google search bar, create an account, and follow the simple steps to publish your book. https://kdp.amazon.com/en_US/ Also, thank you so much and please tell me if you need any more help with your book!

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Thank you! I will ask you if I need any more help!

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Keerththan 😀
03:44 Dec 01, 2020

The ending was heartbreaking! Amazing story! I loved reading this. Amazing work. Keep writing. Would you mind reading my new story "childish dream?"

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Julia Boddie
12:06 Dec 01, 2020

Thank you and of course!

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Jon Turner
06:43 Nov 26, 2020

That was so deep, I loved the beginning and if you studied hard whilst reading it you could imagine you were Nicole, and the creepiness of the teacher, trying to mean well, but you see from another way how things can slowly change.....well written and a good story.

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Julia Boddie
19:50 Nov 28, 2020

Thank you!

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21:19 Nov 25, 2020

Wow, this story is very different (in a good way). I can't believe Ms. Christine would have tried to hurt a student. So sad that Sasha dies. Great job this is really great work!

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Julia Boddie
00:22 Nov 26, 2020

Thank you!

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Keith Edwin
05:45 Nov 25, 2020

That was, interesting. Definitely had a bit of excitement to it, although (please don't take this the wrong way) I didn't find it very realistic. In my head, I can't envision a scenario in which a teacher running after two students with a knife is not taken down by at least one bystander in a crowd. Also, if she was the math teacher, what was she reading aloud to the class at the beginning? I was more confused when she ended up being the math teacher because of that first paragraph than I was that she was evil.

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Julia Boddie
18:21 Nov 25, 2020

Thank you for your feedback and I will change the math teacher part!

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Julia Boddie
18:56 Nov 25, 2020

Unfortunately, I figured out that I cannot edit the story because it has already been approved. I will be careful not to make mistakes like that in the future. Once, again, thanks for your feedback!

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04:16 Nov 23, 2020

Oh my goodness! I loved this so much! It had a very daunting feeling to it, which is hard to capture in a story (usually authors end up making it scary or suspenseful) The twists were placed in such a way, making them surprising without being confusing. Amazing job once more! Keep writing!

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Julia Boddie
18:29 Nov 23, 2020

Thanks a lot!

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Adrian Solorio
19:14 Nov 22, 2020

This seems like a story about trusting one's gut even when it's uncomfortable to do so, like with a teacher or other authority figure. I wonder if the outcome would have been different if Sasha had been as in tune to Ms. Christina's bad vibes as Nicole.

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Elisia Meehan
15:52 Nov 22, 2020

Absolutely mind watering. I want to know more. Great work, you are on point in your categories. Keep up the work. P.s what happens next I'm dying to know. Haha I'm kidding this is really great work.

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Julia Boddie
23:26 Nov 22, 2020

Thank you!

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Ray Dyer
19:46 Nov 20, 2020

There was a twist in this one that I definitely did not see coming. I think, because of the word count limit, there wasn't really an opportunity for Nicole to see more creepy things and start to believe more strongly that she is the only person who understands that this teacher is just...wrong. We have to acknowledge, though, that Nicole did say she was creepy, when the creepiness really begins. I was really surprised by the very violent turn at the end. It left me wanting to know why this was happening, and why she would kill one of the ...

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Julia Boddie
19:53 Nov 20, 2020

Thank you!

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Echo Sundar
17:39 Nov 17, 2020

Wow!! This was great and very eerily creepy :). I love how you made the first sentence me a line in a book. Very creative!!

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Julia Boddie
18:09 Nov 17, 2020

Thank you!

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