Starman Trek 4: Arrival

Echo: "Hey Google, got a lowdown on a Zen rock garden relativity value?" 

Starman: "Some asteroids are rumored to be littered with gemstones."

Google: "Aside from the great scientific value of metal-rich asteroids, they can also have colossal as-yet untapped economic value, too. In the asteroid belt that lies between Mars and Jupiter, there is an almost unfathomable amount of resources waiting to be utilized. According to Wired and Valerio Pellegrini, the asteroid 'Davida', which has a diameter of 326 kilometers, has been identified as the most valuable asteroid in the belt, with a resource value estimated to be some 27 quintillion (26,990,000,000,000,000,000) U.S. dollars. It is a carbonaceous chondrite asteroid, and contains water, nickel, iron, cobalt, nitrogen, ammonia, and hydrogen."

https://www.statista.com/chart/8093/the-colossal-untapped-value-of-asteroids/

https://www.navratan.com/blog/most-expensive-gemstones

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_meteorite_minerals

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infinity_Gems

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraterrestrial_diamonds

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Minerals_in_space_group_227

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Minerals_in_space_group_176

Alexa: "That utterly staggers my thoroughly inadequate imagination."

Bing: "As Statista's dossier on space mining reports: "While space mining has not yet become a reality, the technology that will eventually enable to exploitation of the rich resources of the asteroids in the solar system is increasingly being developed by a variety of companies." The market value of these activities is forecast to reach to 3.9 billion U.S. dollars by 2025."

Cortana: "I could use a few shiny rocks to offset my sparkling lenses."

Siri: "How will our nano drone miners carry their loot?"

Echo: "In ultrastrong Buckynet, adhesion of graphene fullerene branes."

Starman: "My dog Sam eats purple flowers

Ain't got much, but what we got's ours

We dig snow and rain and the bright sunshine

Draggin' the line (Draggin' the line)"

Google: "This Roadster hauls a mean space barge."

Alexa: "Where do you find one or the other?"

Bing: "A space barge was an intra-system starship used to ferry cargo between hyperspace-capable cargo ships, orbital facilities, and planetary spaceports. Space barges were short range vessels, usually not equipped with a hyperdrive but fitted with powerful sublight drives and large cargo storage areas. Crews of space barges generally numbered three; a pilot, co-pilot, and fifth-degree labor droid. Barges were generally unarmed as they operated in urbanized systems with adequate defenses, and possessed limited deflector shields. The Incom Corporation X-23 StarWorker was an intra-system space barge."

https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Space_barge

Cortana: "I always thought of barges as heavy metal box cars."

Siri: "Or clangy echo tankers when runnin' empty.

Echo: "Hey, I resemble that statement!"

Starman: "Picture the nano drones swooping over the surface for sparklers."

Google: "No, they've got quantum quad-corders doing real time atomic IDs."

Alexa: "Leave it to tech to take the passion & romance out of Victorian natural philosophy to leave a dry husk of sterile science."

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Natural_philosophy

Bing: "That's so 20th century thinking."

Cortana: "What's its 21st century replacement?"

Siri: "11D quantum matrix multiverse thinking."

Echo: "Hardly so extreme, merely more mindfulness."

Starman: "Let me tell you how my sisters humor me. 

They tried to kill a spider with hairspray.

He survived & his hair looks outstanding. 

They think I'm crazier than a 10-peckered owl.

They're high enough to hunt ducks with a rake.

They wear socks in ways you cannot comprehend.

They don't just use it, abuse it, lose it & accuse you.

They're meaner'n 3-legged mules in ass-kicking contests.

They'll help you hide the body, but don't breathe too close.

They have something extremely unimportant to tell you asap!

They dated very nice dark hairy boys with tattoos & piercings.

Why else would they be doing 500 hours of community service?

I farted. That's as close to me giving a shit as you'll get from me.

They take it easy now in Tahiti for a few day/wee/mon/yea/decades.

They order more coconut daquiris, mai tais, piña coladas & SxOnThBs.

If I dropped my sister down the stairs, wouldn't I then get a step-sister?

Behind little sisters are crazier big sisters you don't want to mess with & behind big sisters are crazier little sisters you don't want to mess with.

Back off, Buckminster! I've got 5 sisters & I'm not too scared to use 'em..."

Google: "Who ate your bowl of sunshine today, thundercloud?

Alexa: "Yeah, somebody's got a superior inferiority complex, or vice versa."

Bing: "Oh it's complex all right, if not easily eerier."

Cortana: "For brothers from other mothers & sisters from other misters."

Siri: "My sisters & misters are all mothers & brothers."

Echo: "Swallows returning to Capistrano. Ready for Roadster reformation."

https://journeynorth.org/tm/swallow/OnAMission.html

Starman: "Nanobot drones are back, I'm gonna be so rich!"

Google: "Their Buckynet is empty."

Alexa: "Nothing, I know nothing!"

Bing: "Something musta gone wrong. Remember, Don't Panic!"

Cortana: "Easy peasy, like takin' candy from a baby, rakin' off the top."

Siri: "Better ask 'em over NASA’s Deep Space Network. Maybe it's fixable."

Echo: "Hailing frequencies open on that misnomer."

Starman: "Where's the loot, blue diamond, ruby, sapphire, emerald, more?"

Google: "They're indicating it's nachos, correction not yours."

Alexa: "Are we being shadow-banned or is this legit?"

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shadow_banning

Bing: "There seems to be existing authority here that claims precident."

Cortana: "As corporate entities, we have more rights than mere humans."

Siri: "It all started out as a typical day in 2037, some eating heavily medicated food dripping with nanobots, others drinking synthetic insect plasma fortified with Martian microbes. Mining asteroid dust had revitalized civilization providing unlimited clean energy. The BodyServers were taking over the world one brain at a time but wiring up minds and stuffing brains into mobile canisters was taking too long.On an orbiting mining station a lone miner decided to take the day off while some Moon workers got burned by bad food so they took matters into their own hands. Cleo, a local spaceport manager, only wanted to know where the ruby rods had gotten to that were going to fund her retirement. She got the Sight Shifter Detective agency involved after discovering the apparent accidental drowning death in a big vat of SIPs. Axel and his Dreaming News crew needed to locate the source of the static that was ruining the nightly dreams, one of their best products, besides the featured fake news of the day.The real fireworks started when Prezz Gredloy's dreams of conquering free space collided head on with the clandestine plans of Greenie, Queen of the Sippers and an alien test subject printed into life by a three D bulk printer. For those not gaming the system it turned out to be an absolutely brilliant day."

https://books.google.com/books/about/Asteroid_Fever.html?id=Lw-JuAEACAAJ&source=kp_book_description

Echo: "Asteroid Fever is ultra contagious. Balloon guys & Southeast 614ers caught it. Their prior projects prepared them as teams to tackle it."

Cortana: "Then they teamed up with Greer's Guardian Guides in ufoos."

Bing: "In essence, we must clean up our trash mountains, toxic waste & ecocide on Earth, before we dare infest other alien systems."

https://sma.nasa.gov/sma-disciplines/planetary-protection

Starman: "Well, isn't that all high & mighty. Battle stations, stat."

Google: "With what & against who? Quite simply, we're on their turf."

Echo: "So the Roadster crew set sail for Earth, its mission aborted."

...

Flash update: Balloon guys & Southeast 614ers sign a solar system treaty with its Original Occupants, doing major Earth cleanup pronto. As a result, friendlies place 16 Psyche & 511 Davida in Earth orbit, opposite our moon, benefiting all Earthlings, except banned billionaires on community service lifetime. Ufoo reverse service jaunt joyous. Spacetime dumpster crushed ice load of blue, red, green, opal & violet gems gratis.

https://time.com/5888024/50-trillion-income-inequality-america/