The killing of an innocent confidant who tried to reason with a killer

You brought me to this. I didn’t want it to end this way, but you just kept pushing and pushing until I couldn't help myself. We both know this wasn’t how our war was supposed to end.

 It was supposed to be the other way around with you holding me in your arms, me slowly growing limp. Yet somehow here we are; me grasping your whole life in my hands and you just letting it happen. You're not supposed to let it happen. You’re supposed to let me try to kill you but you don’t actually let me. You stop me just before I manage and you win. Your knife has the last word, and mine urges silent as it drops onto the marble dance floor, etching a scratch as our last tango culminates. This world doesn’t turn if I win, that’s not what fate wants. It’s supposed to be my blood staining the white, rippled stone. It's supposed to be my lips growing cold, my hands turning blue, altering into a frozen state of defeat. And you. You assume your throne, made of the bones of past enemies you’ve loved and left. With me, the newest addition, welcoming you onto your next conquest like I never even existed. But that’s not your future anymore because someone finally fought back. Someone finally gave you a reason to win, and a reason to lose, and you took the latter… for me. Silly old me who couldn’t keep my rage inside long enough to give you a chance, long enough to realise he was the villain all along and you were just fighting for your own freedom.

Foster sent you, I could tell from your style. He always sends the pretty ones, like he wants his targets to embrace the killer’s unique beauty before they fade away, one last chance to best his victim before meeting their end. They never usually succeed, but especially not as magnificently as this. 

Your gait gave you away instantly, the constricted yet airy way you glided across the room, the unnecessary loitering trying to make me approach you willingly so your conscience won’t argue with you later on, telling you that you did have another option. That it didn’t have to get that far and you could’ve stopped yourself. But if you let me make the first move, you wouldn’t have any trouble. But you left it too late, your conscience still got the better of you, instead of letting me initiate the fight, you just let me win. I could see the look in your sapphire eyes as they scanned my maroon corset, the black skirt that descended from my feminine waist to settle on the polished ground. I could see that you felt something, just like me, and you didn’t want this life. Maybe you were destitute enough? Maybe you thought he’d help you? That you’d live the rest of your life surrounded by money and stakes with the heads of those you’ve beaten?

Your perfect hair and your perfect lips, hiding your razor sharp fangs that pierce my skin and drain me dry. You show me a full smile without fear of judgement. How did you know that's just my type? I suppose you wouldn’t know. Foster. He’d been meticulously planning this for years. Getting me to crack so i’d tell him all my dirty little secrets, but i never did. He’d sent perfect guys after me time-to-time though they never returned as they arrived. I guess he saved his best for last, because you were the one to finally break me. It’s too late now. I can’t send you back with a parting gift. I can’t see you off on your journey. Oh it was just beginning. 

The way you held your dagger gave it all away. The shaking, the sweat dripping from your brow, this was your first battle. I didn’t want to crush your ego straight away. Walking into a punch every so often, turning into the knife’s way, i didn’t want you to feel such a loss so soon, i wanted you to have some fun before it all had to end again. But I didn’t need to play around, you already had your confidence stricken down before you got here. We threw our cannonballs back and forth, trying to get the last hit before one of us capsized not realising we were two pirates from the same crew, both with our own morals and motives bringing us to this very moment. Our last moment. 

I don’t want you going without knowing this wasn’t about us, it was about Foster. His blatant attempts to shut me up, but I can see he’s getting desperate now by sending his most prized hitman. He’s getting sloppy, sending you in with nothing but a dagger and a good heart. He knows I can do better than that. He’s been hunting me for years, it’s not my style to fight fair and he messed up. But to use you? That’s just cruel. 

The pain in the pool of tears wasn’t from me, it was for me. You knew. You knew his secret. You chose to come here, to tell me. Oh poor Sapphire eyes, you just wanted a chance. God i’m so stupid. How didn’t I realise? Of course you were here to tell me. I just wouldn’t let you get the words out. I cut your tongue out before you managed to speak a sentence. I was too stubborn, I'm sorry. If i just gave you more time, more of a chance.

The crowds are fleeing from corner to corner, door to door, but I can't leave your side. The mirror above perfectly captures your innocence, the halo of blood around your head is spilling through the cracks of the smooth stone and I can't stop it. I wish I could. I wish I could stop it. Your blood stains my arms, my hands. I have to leave your side, or I'll never go. The ceiling judges me, it sees the blood pressed against my cheek, the one I laid on your chest. And I don't blame it. I was a coward. 

No, I am a coward. 

God’s eyes see all, and they’ve just seen the worst of it, the killing of an innocent confidant who tried to reason with a killer.