New Groove

“I did it! We’re all booked and ready to go. I am so excited Steve.”

Nan clasped her hands together and looked dreamily into space.

“I’m sure you are. I probably would be too if I knew what the hell you were talking about.” Steve slapped the newspaper close and threw it on the kitchen table.

“What the hell have you gotten us into now woman?”

Steve was sitting at the head of the table in the dining room of the cozy cottage that they shared doing what he loved to do best- read his morning paper and enjoy a nice hearty breakfast. Nan was moving sporadically back and forth from the kitchen to the dining room with great enthusiasm.

“Oh Steve. When will you ever trust me? I swear! It’s not like I haven’t been doing this for years.” Nan crossed her arms and tilted her head giving her nose just the right angle to point upward, and her lips room to pout.

Steve took no notice.

For over ten years Nan had been the one to search for and book their summer or winter vacations. She took great pleasure in the effort and research she put in to find just the right location for them. She swore Steve was the worst of them. He never seemed to appreciate her effort or even contribute to the planning. If it were up to him, they would vacate at home every year, in seclusion with the air conditioning and a six pack.

‘Sniff Sniff’

“I think you’re burning the bacon again Nan. “ Steve said picking up his paper and opening it up to page 4.

Nan reluctantly left her pouting posture to run over to the stove.

“It’s not burning Steve, it’s crisping. You know I can’t stand soft flesh bacon.” Nan said flipping the six strips in the pan.

“And you know I hate crispily burnt bacon.” Steve said flipping the page of the newspaper with much gusto.

Nan came back to Steve’s side by the kitchen table. She folded her arms across her chest and stared at her husband.

“Now Steve, I really think this trip to New Groove is just what we need to put the spice back in our marriage.”

Steve snapped the paper shut and looked up at his wife. “Spice? We’ve been married for twenty five years now Nan. Spice isn’t what we need, its Alka Seltzer or Tums. Take your pick.” Steve opened up his paper again and resumed reading.

From behind the newspaper she could hear him mumbling.

“Last year you took us to that ski lodge with the special offer of white chocolate. There was one free white chocolate hot drink- one that’s it. The resort was full of couples in their twenties and I still don’t know what the junk is they were listening to- do you?”

“Now now Steve. That was just one incident. But you have to admit the skiing was well…it was rather cool wasn’t it?’ Nan stifled a giggle.

“Then let’s not forget three years ago, the trip to the Monk’s Shrine in Budapest.” Steve grumbled again.

“What was wrong with that? It was relaxing and meditative.” Nan said.

“Meditative my butt. Those folks are running a real smooth operation- millions off of suckers like us- no like you spending their hard earned money promising peace, love and the abundant life. What a load of bullshizer. hmmph”

Nan stared at her husband and quietly subdued the urge to add him to the frying pan with the bacon. She sighed, he was going to love New Groove. That was final.

“I wish you’d told me it was going to be a six hour flight Nan.” Steve said as they stepped out of the airport and headed toward the taxi stand. He pulled down the knee high ends of his coconut palm designed cargo pants and wiggled a little. The pants had slowly ridden up his butt and was giving him a wedgy.

“Oh so you could bring along your newspaper?” Nan asked sarcastically.

“No, so I could have stayed home.”

“Can’t you just feel that ocean breeze welcoming us. Come on Steve breathe it in.”

Just then a tour bus crackled and wheezed as it rode past them leaving a black roll of diesel smoke.”

Nan choked, gasped for air and immediately started coughing.

Steve was only too glad to help put.

He whacked Nan as hard as he could on her back six times before Nan collected herself and turned to glare at her husband.

“You did that on purpose.” Nan glared.

“What? Now I’m in control of when a big diesel smoking bus is going to pass by?”

“Ahghh! You know what I mean. You could have knocked my back out. Then what would we do?”

“Go home.” Steve said looking Nan in the eye.

Before Nan could respond someone approached them.

“Welcome to the Island.”

It was a local cab driver. He was dressed in a bright yellow flamingo designed shirt with a non matching blue dolphin design pants. He fit in well with the rows of palm trees and coconut heavy trunks that lined the airport street and sidewalk.

“Thanks are you a cab man?” Steve asked.

“Yes Sir. The island man for all your Island needs.

“Oh your accent is delightful.” Nan smiled and swayed like a teenager.

Steve rolled his eyes.

“Ah yes, we are headed for the New Groove hotel. Do you know it?” Nan asked.

They made arrangements and soon they were on their way.

Nan and Steve squeezed into the back of an old 1989 yellow sedan and held on for dear life.

The cab man whirled the little old car out of the airport and hit the highway in no time flat. He banked corners doing 40 miles per hour and halted at traffic lights close to never.

Nan clutched Steve. Steve turned the window down and watched the foliage pass by. Every other tree was a coconut, mango or other fruit tree with large inviting fruit hanging generously from the branches.

Steve pulled in deep breathes of the salty crisp air as the vehicle whizzed along. The road was alongside a vast untouched coastline bordering a calm sea where the small ripples seemed to go outward for miles and miles. It was a small compensation for the lack of blood flow he was experiencing in the arm his wife was clutching.

Nan held on to Steve’s hand and repeated her Rosary prayer with eyes shut tight. She took short breaths and held onto to each for five seconds in case it was her last.

They continued on for about forty five minutes before coming to an abrupt halt.

For just one minute, Nan remained stuck to Steve’s shoulder as she clutched his arm. Steve held off for as long as he could before shaking her off and exiting the cab. They had parked under a huge sprawling fig tree complete with dense overhead green foliage and hanging vines. It was a car park. There were several other cabs parked under the tree. Some drivers were also off loading guests while others were cooling out under the shade with cab windows down and all doors wide open.

As their cab man retrieved their bags from the car trunk Steve looked around and whistled.

“Wow this place is huge. Bigger than the dam brochure showed for sure.” The resort was spread out massively with Tennis courts looming on one end, basketball on the other and every other imaginable recreation in between. There were stalls with local vendors spread across the resort compound adding the vibrancy of wood and metal trinkets in contrast to the light playful island colors of the fabrics on display.

Nan was still trying to exit the cab on her own. She adjusted the top of her over-sized coconut shaped breast hugging tank top and straightened out her crumpled Capri pants.

Nan wiped her forehead several times with a hanky from her bag and then looked for Steve.

“Well why the hell isn’t this sweltering heat melting you down too?” Nan asked the back of him since he was now headed towards the main building. It was an old colonial looking building that had been mildly refurbished to give a somewhat modern look. There was a large dolphin waterfall in the front with six life size dolphin sculptures spouting water from their mouths. There were palms lining the path to the main entrance and patches of century plants, mango trees and jasmine bushes nicely arrayed near the foyer.

Steve whistled as he made his way.

“This does not feel like 70’s heat. I’m melting for goodness sake.” Nan exclaimed as she joined Steve at the reception desk.

“Don’t do that honey. It’s not like you’re chocolate or brown sugar. You don’t want to leave a questionable mess on these folks grounds now do you?”

Nan glared at Steve.

“Welcome to the New Groove. May I help you check in please?” The receptionist smiled at them. She had the island accent but it was accentuated by a mild tourist adaptation.

Steve smiled back. He arched his back and was about to say something when Nan shoved him slightly and engaged the pretty young lady.

“My name is Nan Litney and this is my husband Steve Litney. We booked the Matured Honeymoon package.” Nan said holding onto Steve’s arm dearly.

Steve looked at his wife as though she had grown a second nose.

“Yes maam. We have been expecting you. Please come right this way.” The receptionist checked them in and sorted them with keys. Soon a young dark husky looking man with tight shorts and an even tighter collar shirt with pink flamingos grabbed their bags and showed them the way.

Nan and Steve followed the young man along an open path lined with guinep trees, cocoa plums, sea grapes and avocados. Steve put his shades on, occasionally relieved his wedgy and followed the young man with a whistle. Nan reached for her Napkin and dabbed her fore head furiously.

They finally reached the room.

“Wait, is this it?” Nan asked looking at the bungalow in front of them. “ I thought…I thought the brochure said spacious two bedroom villa by the sea? And what is that smell?”

The room was located nearly at the back of the resort compound. The pool entrance could be seen nearly a hundred meters away. There were also few other villas nearby. But the palm trees towered overhead and various fruit trees lined the area. There was a faint smell of passion fruit and jasmine in the air. It smelted with the salty sea air for a pleasant aroma.

“Yes ma’am this is very big, very big. Come inside and see. The smell is that of Jasmine and local fruit. People say it bring healing to ailments; very nice. Also, on the Island, the sea is never far away.”

Nan turned her nose up and stepped quickly into the villa bungalow.

Steve whistled. “This is kinda decent. Not what I was expecting.”

The villa had a small but cozy sitting room area connected with a small kitchenette. There were two bedrooms- on either side of the villa.

Steve whistled. “ I like! I like! Secluded from all the loud hula bula. Got a nice scent going on outside- what would you call that- oh yeah therapeutic; and I got my own room too.” Steve put his head back and a roll of laughter bubbled up from his stomach.

The young man took two steps back and asked if Steve was okay, then he excused himself.

Nan shuddered.

“Nice my foot. It’s not at all what we expected. We’re far away from the pool and sauna. The groove gathering will be on the other end of the compound too- and we likely have to walk there. The smell is..is..well it wouldn’t call it therapeutic- more like puke-ik..”

“Honey…honey…” Steve said in a low deep voice.

Nan paused in her tantrum. She looked at Steve, She hadn’t heard that tone in a long time.

“Honey, let’s not forget the hard work you put in here huh? I am ashamed that I wasn’t more helpful. But you got us here didn’t you?”

Nan looked at Steve shyly.

“Well I…Yes, I just wanted to put my skills to use and…”

“No, no, no. Don’t you dear down play this honey. You worked overtime and I think…I think its time I shut my mouth and give you the praise you deserve.” Steve was patting his wife on both shoulders and smiling like she had not seem him smile in years.

Nan was at a loss of words.

“Now, you know what we need right now?” Steve said smiling a full smile at his wife.

“What honey?” Nan asked sheepishly tugging the edges of her blouse.

“Some well deserved rest. Well, I will see you in a few hours. Happy pool hunting honey. I’ll take this room over here, it’s the smaller one. You deserve more space.”

And with that, Steve rolled his bag into his room, waved at Nan with a broad all teeth motion and swiftly shut the door- and turned the lock.