Heat Seeker

"Heatseeker"

By William A. La Fleur

Suddenly I found myself two steps into a busy street staring at a semi-truck coming straight for me at full speed.

A man texting bumped into me. As soon as he did I shoved him back onto the curb, he fell on his ass and just as the truck was about to hit me I found myself on the top of one of the towers of the Golden Gate Bridge.

In front of me was a worker tottering on the edge. We both looked down and saw that he had not clipped his tether properly to his harness. He fell back completely off balance, only the edge of one shoe on the tower and heading straight for the water far below. I reached out and grabbed one flailing hand in both my hands. As I pulled him back onto the tower he used his other hand to clip himself in securely.

I blinked and was at a public pool with one hand on the reach pole. One of those long poles with a huge hook on one end they keep near the life preservers. I put one hand on the pole just as I heard a loud smack mixed in with the shouts and splashing of people playing in and around the water. Someone had dived off an elevated platform and hit the water wrong. They were unconscious and floating face-down. The lifeguards were all distracted by the other bathers. 

I pulled the pole off the rack, spun it around, and fished the swimmer toward the edge. When she was close enough I grabbed her and pulled her onto the side of the pool.

She wasn't breathing so I turned her head to clear the airway and started mouth to mouth. In a few breaths, she coughed up water and started breathing on her own. 

Just as I felt the hand of the lifeguard on my shoulder I was standing in an alley with a man holding up a gun. Another man at the far end of the alley was running. The man with the gun yelled stop and an obscenity. I could see in his face that he was aiming and saw as his hand started to tense up to pull the trigger. I tackled him, slapping at his arm to spoil his aim. The gun went off, but his shot was wild. 

From the ground, I saw the other man had gotten away, but the man I had tackled swore at me and turned the gun until it pressed against my head. He pulled the trigger and I found myself in a snowbank on the top of a mountain.

I jumped up and spun around. There was a church or temple behind me and a young man holding a bowl.

"Noodles?" he asked.

I looked around, "Are you in danger? Is there an avalanche?"

"Nope," he put a forkful of noodles in his mouth.

I let out a breath and relaxed my shoulders, "Why am I here?"

He continued chewing. "You're the new guardian. The ring found you and now you go to wherever you can do the most good. That's it, ring, guardian," he filled his mouth again.

"Who's sending me to these places, the ring?" I looked at the ring I had bought yesterday at Goodwill.

He shook his head, one noodle dangling from his lip. He slurped it in, "The ring only finds you."

"I bought this ring on a whim when I was donating some old stuff."

"The whim was the ring calling to you."

"This plain ring?"

"It has an inscription."

I looked at it, "There is a pattern."

"That's an inscription. It's stylized."

"What does it say?"

"'The guardian's ring.'"

"Who is sending me to these places?" I was starting to feel the cold. I was shivering and my stomach was twitching.

"Nobody is sending you anywhere. You go to where you can do the most good."

"How? Why? What can I do to get ready? Where am I going next?"

"They didn't tell me," the noodles were done and he scooped snow into the bowl to wash it."

"Who? What else did they tell you?" I had started shivering violently and I almost felt like vomiting.

"They said you're probably having an adrenaline dump now. Don't worry. You go to where you'll do the most good."

"What does that mean exactly?!" I was shouting in my own apartment bedroom. The adrenaline dump really hit me. I let myself fall into bed and didn't remember anything until morning.

When I woke I took the ring off just in case and went about my normal routine with nothing strange happening. I was beginning to think it might have all been a dream when over my cereal I heard a news report about the "latest superhero" who appears and disappears, helping people. They had video or pictures of me. I couldn't believe they even had a video of me on the Golden Gate bridge. Only the gunfight in the alley wasn't shown. 

It was real. I glanced at the ring I had left on my nightstand and thought I might not get zapped anywhere as long as I wasn't wearing it. Then I realized I was late and might miss my train.

The next thing I knew I was standing next to an old lady on the El platform. I helped her pay her fare and then paid mine. 

The rest of the morning was normal interspersed with popping here and there. It was mostly non-life-threatening, holding doors for people, giving directions, I even found myself in our own company copy room to help a coworker get a jam out of the copier. None of it interrupted or disturbed my work. It happened just when I finished a task or was about to take a break anyway.

Then I had a life-threatening one. I was in a restaurant next to a safety sign. I looked and read the response for choking. Then I turned and saw a woman holding her hands up to her throat and turning purple. I ran over, grabbed her elbow, and stood her up before wrapping my arms around her and giving her the Heimlich maneuver. A ball of bread roll popped out and she gasped.

The second Heimlich didn't go as smoothly. That man was much larger. It was difficult to get him to stand and I could barely get my arms around him. By the third one though, I had perfected it and even managed to catch the food so it didn't land among the other patron's plates.

I was a bit rattled after those rapid-fire life-saving events. I sat at my desk breathing heavily for a few moments. I checked my calendar on my computer and noticed a meeting had just been canceled. As I was mentally celebrating the extra hour I had gotten back I found myself in a car.

The driver was texting, had drifted into the oncoming lane and a garbage truck was barreling at us. I shouted, slapped the phone out of his hand, and pulled the steering wheel. I pulled too hard, but the driver, without the phone distraction, took control and avoided slamming into another car on our side of the road.

"Where the hell did you come from?" he said before I blinked away into another car. This one was full of laughing, joking people messing around with each other. The driver had turned to talk to a passenger in the back seat. I grabbed the wheel again and pulled the car back into our lane.

"Hey, who are you?" Was the last thing I heard before I was in a third car. This one was careening through a red light. I didn't have time to swat the phone away and I couldn't reach the brake. I grabbed the wheel and spun it hard with both hands crossing over each other. We managed to just get side-swiped and not tee-boned. The car that hit us and ours stopped in the middle of the intersection blocking traffic both ways.

"Are you all right?" I asked.

"Oh dear God," she said, but I could see that she was okay. Her airbag hadn't even deployed. I jumped out to see if the other driver was okay. He was coming toward me with balled fists and gritted teeth. 

A huge silver man in a silver suit landed between us. He held one hand up as he guided a police car down into the intersection.

"Return to your vehicles, citizens. Everything is under control."

"Magnet Man, this idiot-" was the last I heard from the angry man and found myself at my desk again. I guessed he was okay.

My heart was beating a mile a minute and I had to go to get a drink of water to calm down.

As I calmed down I thought about how the news report didn't know who I was, but if I kept showing up where there were a lot of people someone would either know me or figure out who I was. This didn't matter too much with these little things, but there were superheroes out there. If I were going to be working with the likes of Magnet Man I couldn't just be going around in my work clothes. I'd need a uniform of some sort and something to hide my face.

At lunch, I went to a motorcycle dealership. They sold all sorts of gear including riding leathers, protective clothing, and helmets. I thought I should at the very least get a helmet with a tinted visor to hide my face. Protective clothes wouldn't be a bad idea if I kept getting into crashing cars. I found most of the jackets alone were at the top of my price range, but there was one full suit that was on clearance, and they would throw the helmet in for free. I could see why it was on clearance. It was lime-yellow and hurt my eyes, but I got it, a matching helmet, and a pair of riding boots. The boots were too expensive, but I figured safety first.

After I had bought them I looked at my phone and realized I only had a few more minutes for lunch and I hadn't eaten. I found myself, shopping bag in hand standing in our company cafeteria.

I don't know if it was because I was still a bit jittery from the car crash or if the world had gotten safer in the afternoon, but I stayed at work to finish the day.

By the time I got home, it was dusk. I laid the riding gear out on my bed and stared at it a while before putting it on. I put the helmet on last and as soon as I did I was on the rooftop of a brick building. Standing on the edge of the building was a middle-aged woman in a black camouflage suit. The suit had a mechanical device on the back and the woman had a large club in each hand. Her hair was gray and she wore an eyepatch. Her face was hard, weather-beaten, and scared. She was well-muscled and carried herself like a professional fighter.

"Dragon Thump?" I asked, "Or um, do you still call yourself Flying Dragon?"

"Don't call myself anything," she growled. I looked down into the street to see what she was watching and saw fires and explosions. Cars were scattered everywhere and people were running.

There was a twelve-foot tall woman in metal armor with two giant axes cutting cars apart. I knew she was Battle Queen. A few yards above her floated Count Menace. His cloak flowed around him as he shot lightning bolts into storefronts and light poles. Finally, flowing all around the street was a sickly green fog, the work of the Green Phantom who must be around somewhere.

I looked at Dragon Thump planning her strategy. Without looking at me she said, "What can you do?"

"Not really anything."

"Bullshit, you teleported here."

"I can't control it."

Then she looked at me and grunted. She turned her attention away from me and I thought she might have decided to ignore me completely. She stepped up to the edge of the roof. A set of stubby wings sprang from her suit. She leaned forward, but before she launched herself she pointed with one club and shouted, but didn't turn. "Get them out of there."

She launched herself off the roof. 

I went right up to the edge and saw she had been pointing at a stranded and wedged-in bus full of people. I yelled as loudly as I could, "Keep them away until I do."

For an instant, I thought I saw her nod that she heard me and I was in the bus among the frightened, wailing crowd. I grabbed two young people and we were in a child's bedroom. I let go and was back on the bus.

I was hit in the head with a laptop. It was a good thing I was wearing the helmet. A woman was screaming at me in a language I didn't understand. I shouted, "No comprendo, no comprendo, amigo amigo."

The man with the laptop hit me again. He shouted in Spanish I guess and then in English he said, "You took her children you bastard!"

I grabbed his arm and we were in the child's bedroom. He saw the surprised children who shouted, "Mama, mama?"

I didn't let go of the man and we were both back on the bus. I let him go. The crowd closed in to attack me and the man shouted, "No, this is one of the good ones!"

I saw the mother and grabbed her wrist. We were in her apartment and her children rushed to her. I let go and was back on the bus.

The bilingual laptop man had managed to convince them I was a good-guy and they presented themselves to me in pairs as the fight raged on outside. Often the bus rocked and fires burst outside. Once I went back and the bus was on its side, but no one was too hurt. I ended up taking the injured ones to a hospital somewhere. I've no idea where.

When the bus was empty I found myself on the sidewalk alone. As a complete shot in the dark, I took a step forward, my arms wide and closed them like I was surprise-hugging someone. My arms closed on an unseen person.

"Hey, let me go!" the Green Phantom shouted. I didn't let her go until we were in a police station holding cell.

When I did let go I found myself a few stories above the street. In a panic, I reached out to keep from falling. I managed to catch Count Menace's cloak and we fell to the floor in a police holding cell.

I let go of him and found myself standing on the street as Dragon Thump clobbered Battle Queen and she went down for the count. Dragon Thump quickly scanned the street. "Bus clear?"

"Yep."

"Take her in," she pointed at Battle Queen and turned to leave. Suddenly she turned and looked at me, "Thanks, but if you intend to take this seriously you better learn some things." She turned and leaped about two stories up on the wall of one of the brick buildings. She ran up the wall to the roof and was gone.

I took Battle Queen to the police station and found myself back home. I quickly stripped out of my hero outfit and took a long, hot shower. The adrenaline dump the night before was nothing compared to the night with Dragon Thump.

My night was peaceful and I rested. It was even peaceful the next morning for the most part. I only had to turn the coffee pot on in the office when someone had forgotten, refilled the ink in the copier, and helped an executive with an electronic conference call that could decide the fate of our company. Nothing big.

I found myself sitting in my cube looking at several sites on the web. One was for Krav Maga classes, one for general self-defense that included instructions on something called an OODA loop, but the ones I signed up for were the advanced first aid and Spanish classes.